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Old 2011-02-12, 12:53   Link #8101
Suomi
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Originally Posted by zebra View Post

Spoiler for reaction:
YAY! *hugs*

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well! Are you only writing him back, or are you actively sending him things, too? How long are the texts you send? Do you talk about stuff you don't talk about with everyone? How do you act in front of him? Do you treat him any different than others? Are you always smiling when talking to him? Touching him (like the shoulder or arm) during conversations?
I do both. the text vary in length from a line to several sentences. do I talk about stuff I don't talk about with everyone? not really. Do I treat him any different than others? sort of. He's my only guy friend, so...
am I always smiling? Yes I am! Touching? No, because usually it's when we're both doing something that we end up talking, cause our only class together is orchestra. we pass in the halls sometimes and smile and say hello, and sometimes he says "Hello, [my name]!" or something along those lines even if I just smile and wave.
Quote:
He might be just as unsure what you want from him as you are
My advice is just to wait and see how thing's develop. But be careful to not lead him on unnecessarily. But considering you don't exclude the possibilty of liking him, that doesn't seem likely.
There is no need to hurry, specially if neither of you has explicity shown interest. Just enjoy yourselves like you've been doing the whole time.
probably. And I agree, that's what I plan on doing. Letting things happen as they happen.
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Old 2011-02-12, 12:53   Link #8102
Ascaloth
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Originally Posted by zebra View Post
Its the day someone somewhere misses out on getting a selfmade dessert and dinner by me!
I only care about that day if I have special someone, other than that - there are many chocolates in heart shapes on sale once it passes!
Oh, don't let that homemade dessert and dinner go to waste! I'll happily receive such a wonderful gift from you!

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Old 2011-02-12, 13:06   Link #8103
Hiroi Sekai
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Originally Posted by Moczo View Post
Reasonable. Valentine's is only a holiday if you're with someone. Otherwise it's just a day for all the couples of the world to buy overpriced chocolate and rub their happiness in the face of us single people.
That's not true, in my opinion. The original story of Valentine's Day didn't even involve an actual couple. It IS a great day to do something extra special with your partner, but in reality you shouldn't be waiting for Valentine's Day to give special treatment; that should happen every day.

Oh, and am I trying to justify it because I'm single? N-no, nothing of the sort! *whistles*

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Originally Posted by Illusore View Post
he is a huge gaming fan, video games are like...his life.
I won't go all "gamer" on you, but from my own experience, that sounds like something veeeeeery positive. All my casual gaming friends don't even take a pause once they start playing, but for somebody who basically lives video games, it's quite a push to do something like keep a text conversation going while playing.
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Old 2011-02-12, 14:03   Link #8104
NightbatŪ
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Computers and cellphones

They can throw quite a wrench in anyones lovelife XD
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Old 2011-02-12, 14:06   Link #8105
RadiantBeam
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NightbatŪ View Post
Computers and cellphones

They can throw quite a wrench in anyones lovelife XD
Certainly makes things interesting though when your mom likes to snoop through your text messages.
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Old 2011-02-12, 14:15   Link #8106
zebra
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Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
Certainly makes things interesting though when your mom likes to snoop through your text messages.
o_O That's a total foul!

My mother likes to ask about everything concerning my love life and those of my friends, but she would never snoop around. Privacy is private.
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Old 2011-02-12, 14:42   Link #8107
whitepearl
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But if you are in a very healthy relationship with a significant other, is there an unwritten right for each other to secretly check on text messages and/or email?
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Old 2011-02-12, 14:51   Link #8108
GDB
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Originally Posted by whitepearl View Post
But if you are in a very healthy relationship with a significant other, is there an unwritten right for each other to secretly check on text messages and/or email?
How can it be 'very healthy' if one doesn't trust the other enough that they feel a need to secretly spy on their conveyances?
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Old 2011-02-12, 15:26   Link #8109
Dextro
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ascaloth View Post
Oh, don't let that homemade dessert and dinner go to waste! I'll happily receive such a wonderful gift from you!

Damn you Ascaloth, you beat me to the punch!

On a more serious note can't a guy leave for a bit? You guys have given all the good advice already

Anyway just adding my 2 cents to the "I think he might like you but you should just go on as usual and let things develop on their own for a while" camp. Also another 2 cents to the "Valentines day is just the day people with relationships rub that in the face of people without them" with a side-dish of "Valentines day is the second largest capitalist holiday of modern times"
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Old 2011-02-12, 16:35   Link #8110
NightbatŪ
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
Certainly makes things interesting though when your mom likes to snoop through your text messages.
Oh I was more pointing to the fact people don't seem to want to meet face to face anymore
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Old 2011-02-12, 16:54   Link #8111
Kafriel
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Quote:
Also another 2 cents to the "Valentines day is just the day people with relationships rub that in the face of people without them" with a side-dish of "Valentines day is the second largest capitalist holiday of modern times"
Adding to that, it's the best topic to bring up to see if someone's interested in you or not! Too bad it falls right in the middle of my exams...but it's not like there are any girls around here anyway.
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Old 2011-02-12, 16:57   Link #8112
whitepearl
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GDB View Post
How can it be 'very healthy' if one doesn't trust the other enough that they feel a need to secretly spy on their conveyances?
I brought this topic up because it came up on another discussion forum I post on.

Apparently some people believe they have the right to snoop on their significant other's phone to see if they suspect something is up.

I would trust the other person enough not to have to do what is basically an unwarranted search. Just wondered what everyone else thinks.
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Old 2011-02-12, 17:13   Link #8113
zebra
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Quote:
Originally Posted by whitepearl View Post
But if you are in a very healthy relationship with a significant other, is there an unwritten right for each other to secretly check on text messages and/or email?
That's a total no go. It's an unwritten law that it's forbidden!

Snooping around on my phone is an easy way to tick me off really good. I don't mind if my boyfriend takes calls for me or reads messages coming in, while I'm gone showering or something. But he needs my permission first. If I don't allow him to look into my mailbox or anywhere else, he really shouldn't do that. I don't snoop around either. Respecting each other's privacy is pretty important imo and if you really feel like you need to snoop around you don't trust me. And that's something I can't stand.

It's okay to go through things if you have the permission but checking messages and calls secretly is just kick-worthy.

"Say who's that Mike texting you?"
"A former coworker, honey *strangles*"
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Old 2011-02-12, 19:16   Link #8114
RadiantBeam
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Quote:
Originally Posted by whitepearl View Post
I brought this topic up because it came up on another discussion forum I post on.

Apparently some people believe they have the right to snoop on their significant other's phone to see if they suspect something is up.

I would trust the other person enough not to have to do what is basically an unwarranted search. Just wondered what everyone else thinks.
I don't find that healthy at all. The whole idea of having a relationship is that you trust that person enough to think that if something is going on, they'll come to you and talk about it. You snooping through their text messages is an invasion of privacy, and if you're really so worried about something in the relationship, you should ask them up front instead of going behind their backs.
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Old 2011-02-12, 19:48   Link #8115
mindovermatter
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I agree with you @RadiantBeam, except that some people are chronically suspicious and nervous about being betrayed, but constantly asking your partner about it could be seen as mistrust, and break a couple up. If you want to relieve your nervousness without straining the relationship, I can see why some people would do it
I'm not saying it's ok to steal someones phone and look through the messages, but I could understand why someone would want to do it discretely without making an issue.
Having said that though, I would hope that anyone I'm with I can trust fully
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Old 2011-02-12, 20:04   Link #8116
synaesthetic
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My phone is like my computer. Touch it and you die. I don't care who it is doing the touching.
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Old 2011-02-12, 20:13   Link #8117
blissfullyunaware
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I also agree. I firmly believe trust and honesty are essential in any relationship and detest snooping. Open and honest communication is the key and if you don't believe your partner is giving you that then you probably shouldn't be together. Also, by not respecting their privacy, you are demonstrating a severe lack of faith in the relationship. No good can come from this.
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Old 2011-02-12, 21:02   Link #8118
RadiantBeam
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mindovermatter View Post
I agree with you @RadiantBeam, except that some people are chronically suspicious and nervous about being betrayed, but constantly asking your partner about it could be seen as mistrust, and break a couple up. If you want to relieve your nervousness without straining the relationship, I can see why some people would do it
I'm not saying it's ok to steal someones phone and look through the messages, but I could understand why someone would want to do it discretely without making an issue.
Having said that though, I would hope that anyone I'm with I can trust fully
Yeah, but see, you assume that the person will be able to continue doing it without getting caught; sooner or later they will be walked in on, and the explosion will be legendary. The only reason my mom, for example, has gotten away with checking my sister's texts for so long is because I'm always the one who walks in on her while she's doing it, and I don't tell my sister about it because it's none of my business. But I do know that the day my sister walks in and sees her, I hope I'm out of the house.
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Old 2011-02-12, 21:12   Link #8119
Samari
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Originally Posted by synaesthetic View Post
My phone is like my computer. Touch it and you die. I don't care who it is doing the touching.
Agreed. Unless it's some beautiful girl that wants to give me her number.
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Old 2011-02-12, 21:29   Link #8120
cheyannew
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Join Date: Dec 2005
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mindovermatter View Post
I agree with you @RadiantBeam, except that some people are chronically suspicious and nervous about being betrayed, but constantly asking your partner about it could be seen as mistrust, and break a couple up. If you want to relieve your nervousness without straining the relationship, I can see why some people would do it
I'm not saying it's ok to steal someones phone and look through the messages, but I could understand why someone would want to do it discretely without making an issue.
Having said that though, I would hope that anyone I'm with I can trust fully
Meh; if you're that bloody paranoid about your partner, something is seriously wrong that snooping won't resolve, IMO.

Yeah, hubby and I know one another's email passwords; there's been times we'll need something and can't get to email ("Hey, my brother sent us pics, go nab them & print them out please" and the like). do we snoop? nah, why bother? I mean, he can just ask me whatever's on his mind, etc.

I have to say, him sneaking around and looking through my phone instead of just asking me would break us up faster than him asking haha
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