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Old 2011-06-04, 02:34   Link #8941
Samari
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Endless Soul View Post
Speaking from experience, never date someone you work with.
Every situation is different. Especially since every kind of job is different. Not to mention the people you associate with. I don't think you can just make a generalization like that.
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Old 2011-06-04, 10:41   Link #8942
Endless Soul
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Samari View Post
Every situation is different. Especially since every kind of job is different. Not to mention the people you associate with. I don't think you can just make a generalization like that.
It's not a generalization, it's a rule. You're quite right, there's an exception to every rule. My original comment was intended as a warning. If he can manage to go out with her and keep their relationship out of the workplace, hey great! However odds are that isn't going to happen. If they get together things will get akward in the work place, especially if somewhere down the line they break up and are still working together.

It might happen, it might not happen. Who knows? However, I'm going to stick with my original advice and say don't do it until one or the other works someplace else.
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Old 2011-06-04, 12:10   Link #8943
RadiantBeam
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Streetor View Post
About a month ago. So, what should the plan be? Her ex and her had been together for about 5 years which is an incredibly long time. Shall I give her some time and let her enjoy single life since she has not experienced it in a long time? Or should I try and make my move.

If I were to try to make a move, it may lead to awkwardness, but she is just a part time worker and only works a few hours every few days while I am a full time worker.
I'm going to say give her some time. Five years is a long time for a relationship to last, and she needs time to recover and enjoy the single life a bit.
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Old 2011-06-04, 20:56   Link #8944
Samari
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Endless Soul View Post
It's not a generalization, it's a rule. You're quite right, there's an exception to every rule. My original comment was intended as a warning. If he can manage to go out with her and keep their relationship out of the workplace, hey great! However odds are that isn't going to happen. If they get together things will get akward in the work place, especially if somewhere down the line they break up and are still working together.

It might happen, it might not happen. Who knows? However, I'm going to stick with my original advice and say don't do it until one or the other works someplace else.
Sorry I can't go by that philosophy. If it can potentially cost you your job for whatever reason, maybe. If not, who cares. Sure people break up and things can happen down the line, but I wouldn't let work get in the way of a chance to be happy with someone. Essentially I wouldn't be scared to make a move "just because". That would be like choosing not to go outside because you could get hit by a car.
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Old 2011-06-04, 23:32   Link #8945
Masuzu
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That would be like choosing not to go outside because you could get hit by a car.
finally someone understand, those damn drivers driving too fast
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Old 2011-06-05, 10:12   Link #8946
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Streetor View Post
About a month ago. So, what should the plan be? Her ex and her had been together for about 5 years which is an incredibly long time. Shall I give her some time and let her enjoy single life since she has not experienced it in a long time? Or should I try and make my move.

If I were to try to make a move, it may lead to awkwardness, but she is just a part time worker and only works a few hours every few days while I am a full time worker.
Befriend her first or if the both of you are already friends just spend time with her. Do some gentlemanly stuff but don't make it too excessive. Don't rush as she may still harbor feelings for her ex.
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Old 2011-06-05, 10:40   Link #8947
Endless Soul
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Samari View Post
Sorry I can't go by that philosophy. If it can potentially cost you your job for whatever reason, maybe. If not, who cares. Sure people break up and things can happen down the line, but I wouldn't let work get in the way of a chance to be happy with someone. Essentially I wouldn't be scared to make a move "just because". That would be like choosing not to go outside because you could get hit by a car.
That's fine. In the end it's not up to either one of us. I guess we'll see what happens.
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Old 2011-06-07, 06:04   Link #8948
hamandbacon
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How to start dating after divorce?

My aunt has been divorced for 4 years... his ex husband already has a new girlfriend now. She is now on her 30's... do you know how i can help her to start dating again after her divorce?




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Last edited by hamandbacon; 2011-07-08 at 14:05.
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Old 2011-06-07, 06:42   Link #8949
Tsuyoshi
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This thread is better suited here imho
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Old 2011-06-07, 07:48   Link #8950
Vexx
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Frankly, I'd recommend a dating service like eHarmony. Otherwise, her options are "church of choice", taking classes (either non-credit or credit), or annoying "friends fix up". Obviously, I do not recommend the random "bar hopping" option.

Crafts, hobbies, learning, activities - places where people with a known chance of like-minded tastes in something....

Several of my friends who have successfully found new companions in "after 30" life all used a dating/matchmaking service or activity clubs to narrow the search down.
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Old 2011-06-07, 15:17   Link #8951
synaesthetic
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I wouldn't suggest eHarmony unless she's a conservative Christian. Since, well, that's all you find on eHarmony are conservative Christians and the odd raving fundamentalist.
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Old 2011-06-07, 15:25   Link #8952
blissfullyunaware
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hamandbacon View Post
My aunt has been divorced for 4 years... his ex husband already has a new girlfriend now. She is now on her 30's... do you know how i can help her to start dating again after her divorce?
Ok, I dont mean any offense by this, so please dont take it that way. But does she even want your help. Because I dont think you can. Or SHOULD. Im assuming your aunt is an adult capable of making her own decisions and leading her own life. 4 years does seem a little excessive, but I dont know how long her and her ex were together or how bad things were when they split. She may just be hesitant to go through that again. Or shes enjoying the freedom of being single.


Of course, if she does want your help then Id listen to Vexx.
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Old 2011-06-08, 03:33   Link #8953
Flinch
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Woah, am I the only one who is more startled by the increase in tags here more than anything? (Sorry if I come off as shallow, I'm running on fumes from yesterday)
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Old 2011-06-08, 04:04   Link #8954
Kafriel
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It's because of the merge with that other thread, from the post above Tsuyoshi's.
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Old 2011-06-08, 09:14   Link #8955
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This thread merged with another thread? When?
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Old 2011-06-08, 10:25   Link #8956
Last Sinner
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From the hamandbacon post.

On-topic, dating services can work, since an uncle of mine is still married to the woman he met through one. But generally they won't.
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Old 2011-06-16, 09:17   Link #8957
Khu
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Bored, so:

If you are in your last year of school, and you have university entrance exams in October, is it advisable to get a girlfriend?

(I'm not in this situation. Just throwing it out there.)
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Old 2011-06-16, 09:24   Link #8958
Sumeragi
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Khu View Post
Bored, so:

If you are in your last year of school, and you have university entrance exams in October, is it advisable to get a girlfriend?

(I'm not in this situation. Just throwing it out there.)
A new girlfriend? 95% no.
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Old 2011-06-16, 09:35   Link #8959
cheyannew
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Khu View Post
Bored, so:

If you are in your last year of school, and you have university entrance exams in October, is it advisable to get a girlfriend?

(I'm not in this situation. Just throwing it out there.)
That depends on an awful lot of things, and there's no single answer.

1: Do you (whoever) have any interest in a possible long distance relationship?
2: does the other person?
3: Do you have the maturity and communication skills, as well as self-confidence to make a LD relationship work?
4: Are you going to plague yourself with "what if they're cheating on me" thoughts all the time?
5: Will you see other people as well, nothing serious? Or is this an all or nothing thing
6: Where do you plan on being in 5 years (however long you'll be apart in Uni)? Can you logistically figure this person in things?
7: Do they perhaps (and/or you) merely want company until such time as you move off into Uni? Maybe you'll both be going to a local one, and LD isn't an issue.

There's a plethora of other questions involved before someone can say "yes" or "no".
But then, that's any relationship
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Old 2011-06-16, 13:13   Link #8960
DonQuigleone
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This is entirely presuming you can get a girlfriend in that time.

All I'm saying is, don't look a gift horse in the mouth. If you meet someone nice, and you get along, why not give it a go? I wouldn't get into anything serious though, but then I wouldn't advise getting too serious with a person after only 3 months anyway.
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