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Old 2010-08-07, 19:39   Link #26341
spawnofthejudge
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Beyond the Edge
Chapter Eight: Time for a Rest
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5651895/8/Beyond_the_Edge

Fate frowned. “You've never seen the pattern before?” Fate barely waited for Shari's nod. “That's... frustrating.”
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Old 2010-08-07, 22:43   Link #26342
Moczo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
Vivio: Um.... Lutecia?

Shari: Ah, right, right! Well, just defeat it all by yourself. Girls are suckers for that.

Vivio: I DON'T WANNA DIE!!!
Shari: Well then, I guess you'd better win.

Vivio: HOW?!

Shari: What, I come up with all these ideas for weapons of terror, now I'm supposed to come up with ways to stop them too?

Vivio: Isn't that just common sense?!

Shari: Geez, calm down. Lucretia is never going to like you if you're panicking all the time.

Vivio: It's Lutec... you know what, never mind, I'm going to go talk to someone sane. (Stops to consider the rest of the cast). ... Actually, I might be better off taking my chances with the Robo-Croc.
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Old 2010-08-07, 22:46   Link #26343
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Moczo View Post
Shari: Well then, I guess you'd better win.

Vivio: HOW?!

Shari: What, I come up with all these ideas for weapons of terror, now I'm supposed to come up with ways to stop them too?

Vivio: Isn't that just common sense?!

Shari: Geez, calm down. Lucretia is never going to like you if you're panicking all the time.

Vivio: It's Lutec... you know what, never mind, I'm going to go talk to someone sane. (Stops to consider the rest of the cast). ... Actually, I might be better off taking my chances with the Robo-Croc.
Shari: Don't worry, I'm sure you'll figure out how to beat it! Eventually!

Vivio: Thanks, that's so encouraging...
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Old 2010-08-07, 22:54   Link #26344
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I'm torn on whether or not to keep this little exchange written down and use it in the actual story. It's just got that 'Shari' feel to it. Or rather, it's got the feel of my power-mad, amoral Shari who thinks nothing of strapping a lethal weapon to a teenager who has no use for it, just 'cause she thinks lasers look cool.
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Old 2010-08-07, 22:56   Link #26345
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I would not complain if you did. For the record.
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Old 2010-08-07, 23:13   Link #26346
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Moczo, if your amoral Shari has parallels to Blazblue's Kokonoe (when she's in her zany mad scientist mood and not a jerkass), then I'm interested in reading more!
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Old 2010-08-07, 23:21   Link #26347
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nanya01 View Post
I've been talking to Yasanagi...

And I'm starting to lose the will to write on Material Days.

Dunno if I'll stop, I nearly did once before, but I might just stop writing on it this time. We'll see.

So, at the very least, I'm probably going to be taking a break from writing it.
Up to you, though I don't really see why my objections would make you lose interest. I'm just one person so my opinion doesn't matter
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Old 2010-08-07, 23:40   Link #26348
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yasanagi View Post
Moczo, if your amoral Shari has parallels to Blazblue's Kokonoe (when she's in her zany mad scientist mood and not a jerkass), then I'm interested in reading more!
Having never played BlazBlue, I can't answer that for sure. All I can say is that she's... well...

She's interesting, let's put it like that. The whole 'robo-croc' goofery I had going with RB for a little bit there is actually not really out of character. She'd make one, and she honestly wouldn't see the problem with it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nanya01 View Post
I've been talking to Yasanagi...

And I'm starting to lose the will to write on Material Days.

Dunno if I'll stop, I nearly did once before, but I might just stop writing on it this time. We'll see.

So, at the very least, I'm probably going to be taking a break from writing it.
Ouch. Sorry, man. All I can advise is that you do indeed take a break before you decide on anything permanent. Material Days has been going pretty steadily for quite awhile, and I can see how it might burn you out. Nothing wrong with relaxing for a little while to refocus yourself.
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Old 2010-08-08, 00:34   Link #26349
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Spoiler for More Material Days:
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Old 2010-08-08, 07:24   Link #26350
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Originally Posted by Yasanagi View Post
Spoiler for More Material Days:
Oh boy... Those kind of things always come back to bite you in the ass at the worst possible time. I can see the reasons as to why use it (needed a full restoration, procedure wasn't enough), but this may turn ugly fast if Yami doesn't take that off before Mid. And suddenly, Yuuno's behavior makes a lot more sense.

Now, that scene when they arrive may just turn out hilarious. Guys at spaceport expect religious nuts... And when people will see the Materials, it will be general panic, with Yuuno asking what the hell when the area becomes deserted.
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Old 2010-08-08, 07:29   Link #26351
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Oh yeah, Yasanagi, only just caught the BlazBlue ref in super-chapter 3. >_>;
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Old 2010-08-08, 09:21   Link #26352
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yasanagi View Post
Spoiler for More Material Days:
So you've decided to explain it away by saying "a wizard did it"... Well, it's a little cheap, but I guess it'll work so long as Yuuno acts appropriately when he discovers he's been manipulated like that into doing those things.
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Old 2010-08-08, 10:08   Link #26353
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The thing is that I already knew it was going to look like a cop out/asspull since there was a lack of foreshadowing in earlier episodes but I needed to get something out there to show that there's more to things that meets the eye. When I do the FF.Net version, I will be adding in more scenes of Material-D that will serve as background for her actions.
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Old 2010-08-08, 13:28   Link #26354
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I'm glad it's been cleared up, if you can get just a little foreshadowing for the FF.net version that should work out nicely...even if it is a copout. Like Raiser said if you make yuuno react aproprietly everything should balance everything else out.
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Old 2010-08-08, 14:55   Link #26355
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yasanagi View Post
The thing is that I already knew it was going to look like a cop out/asspull since there was a lack of foreshadowing in earlier episodes but I needed to get something out there to show that there's more to things that meets the eye. When I do the FF.Net version, I will be adding in more scenes of Material-D that will serve as background for her actions.
Upon thinking about it more, it's actually a great move on your part. It certainly makes sense, as Yuuno was unwilling to have sex with and recharge the Materials properly. Yami saw this as a problem and knew for the sake of their survival she needed a way to make Yuuno go that far. Manipulating him with magic is certainly an option at her disposal.

It also opens the door for a lot of good conflict to come. Not only will Yuuno flip out about it, perhaps even Seikou may find it distasteful. She's certainly 'main heroine' material (pun not intended) and seems to be genuinely falling for him, so she might not like that he's only willing to sleep with her because of mind control. Not to mention when Nanoha and the others learn what they've been doing their reactions have a lot of potential as well. Definitely something to look forward to.
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Old 2010-08-08, 18:45   Link #26356
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Wow, didn't think that move would swing your opinion so much Raiser. And you were thinking about dropping it a snippet ago.

As for me, I just imagined a heart-breaking situation for Material-S in the future.
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Old 2010-08-08, 18:54   Link #26357
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Originally Posted by Megaolix View Post
Wow, didn't think that move would swing your opinion so much Raiser. And you were thinking about dropping it a snippet ago.
Indeed. Well, the sex bugged me but I can get over that. Otherwise the OOCness was the main concern but not only has that been addressed, but the explanation used has opened the door for so many possibilities.

Well, with all this Materials related happenings lately, I figured I should contribute some of my own. So...

Materials no Jikan chapter 2: Such a Long Day

Chapter 1 can be found here. This chapter is much longer

Spoiler for MnJ chapter 2: Such a Long Day:
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Old 2010-08-08, 19:12   Link #26358
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Raiser, you made my day with this. Thanks for posting it up!
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Old 2010-08-08, 19:19   Link #26359
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Originally Posted by 00-Raiser View Post
Indeed. Well, the sex bugged me but I can get over that. Otherwise the OOCness was the main concern but not only has that been addressed, but the explanation used has opened the door for so many possibilities.

Well, with all this Materials related happenings lately, I figured I should contribute some of my own. So...

Materials no Jikan chapter 2: Such a Long Day

Chapter 1 can be found here. This chapter is much longer

Spoiler for MnJ chapter 2: Such a Long Day:
Oh boy... And to think you still haven't told us the reactions from Nanoha, Fate and Hayate. Then again, Chrono is probably not cruel enough to tell them.

And have you perhaps been playing Blazblue Raiser? I can clearly see where 'boobie-book-lady' came from. Then again, Taokaka is awesome so it's not like it's a bad thing.
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Old 2010-08-08, 19:27   Link #26360
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 00-Raiser View Post
Indeed. Well, the sex bugged me but I can get over that. Otherwise the OOCness was the main concern but not only has that been addressed, but the explanation used has opened the door for so many possibilities.

Well, with all this Materials related happenings lately, I figured I should contribute some of my own. So...

Materials no Jikan chapter 2: Such a Long Day

Chapter 1 can be found here. This chapter is much longer

Spoiler for MnJ chapter 2: Such a Long Day:
I found that unbelievable funny, I don't know why but I couldn't stop laughing. It made me thank God that Yuuno is such a sensible, levelheaded person or he would have been driven insane within five minutes. Characterisation was good and everyone seems to have a very distinct personality, also I love your writing style a great chapter.
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