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Old 2009-11-02, 13:08   Link #18261
RadiantBeam
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 00-Raiser View Post
On that note, what's AS's policy on violence and gore?
I think it just needs to come with a warning before the chapter of how detailed it is, or be labelled as "NSFW". I think, I'm not all that sure.

EDIT: Pageclaim for censors!
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Old 2009-11-02, 13:10   Link #18262
Satashi
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Allquall View Post
I haven't written anything other than work-related crap for a long while, and my prose is really off. So, please pardon some very shitty shorts as I try to get my writing chops back into shape.

Spoiler for BATBED!:


@spawn NoW is next and currently underway, but my writing is absolute shite at the moment. I may release another Dusty Trail as a work-out, but I haven't given up on NoW.
XDD always fun seeing them act like that. Here's hoping it wasn't a real life situation
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Old 2009-11-02, 14:05   Link #18263
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Had this song stuck in my head... HAD to modify it for Nanoha...

Spoiler for She Likes to Blast:
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Old 2009-11-02, 14:06   Link #18264
RadiantBeam
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nanya01 View Post
Had this song stuck in my head... HAD to modify it for Nanoha...

Spoiler for She Likes to Blast:
...

I think my IQ just dropped several points. XD
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Old 2009-11-02, 14:09   Link #18265
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Xellos alone would already have been alone to make that fic worth reading. <3
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Old 2009-11-02, 14:12   Link #18266
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Keroko View Post
Xellos alone would already have been alone to make that fic worth reading. <3
Glad you liked it.

Xellos is awesome!
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Old 2009-11-02, 14:48   Link #18267
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DezoPenguin View Post
Good short! Really, the only thing I have trouble with is Fate's lack of response to Nena killing the comm officer. Obviously, this is taking place within the context of a "people are getting killed out here" war setting rather than a police action where standards apply, but...she's Fate, after all; she's adopted Nanoha's ethics not so much as ethical standards in and of themself but as articles of faith. Of course, since I haven't read the last couple of chapters of the major fic since you announced it was going to rewrite, for all I know, that particular bridge has been crossed already...
It really hasn't--at the end of 4th phase, Fate objected very strongly to Chrono's recruiting of Nena in the first place, rather than throwing her in jail alongside... Jail... to rot forever. It was actually Nanoha who spoke up in Nena's defense, which I felt appropriate despite Nena's various misdeeds. Nobody can forgive like Nanoha.

But even though Talking is a Free Action in most anime and manga, I chose to have Fate chew Nena out after everything is said and done. Don't worry, she'll get an earful of Fate's Nanoha-inspired moral code.

Pairing Fate with Nena was a very deliberate decision, especially in a wartime setting. Chrono believes that Fate is the best one to watch Nena, since her magic can pierce Nena's resistance, and Fate won't let the mercenary go overboard.

At the same time, Nena's Neutral Evil-ness, her words and actions will seriously test the foundations of Fate's Lawful Good-ness. I figure this will make for some delicious drama.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DezoPenguin View Post
Stuff I like:

A Yuuno sighting! (Though, um, his name's still "Scrya"--it just sounds like it ought to be "Scryer") Better yet, a Yuuno sighting in which he's been given a nice, juicy research mystery to sink his teeth into; I'm interested already.
I've got big plans for ferret-boy. He's always been one of my favorite characters from the series and I hated seeing him put on a bus in StrikerS. I needed a good reason for an invading force made up of non-administrated worlds to attack the Bureau and its parent government, the Inter-dimensional Administration of Free Worlds.

Since it's Nanoha--definitely AU, but still MGLN--I figured Lost Logia would be as good a plot coupon as any. But rest assured, these Lost Logia are hardly normal, even going by previous examples.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DezoPenguin View Post
Chrono! Heh, for obvious reasons, I approve completely of Chrono being the guy sending out missions with a pragmatic attitude. Of all the franchise characters, he's the one I'd consider best suited for the running of an actual, y'know, war.
Yes. Throughout all of StrikerS, Chrono's attitude was very pragmatic and probably the only member of the main cast that actually acted like a real-world military officer.

He's running the space war, but Hayate will likely be running the ground war. When she recovers, anyway. (read the prequel story if you want to know what happened to her)

Quote:
Originally Posted by DezoPenguin View Post
I loved the bit where the lieutenant was thinking about how the attacking mage would have to stop to unleash anything to seriously hurt him. Here's a solid case of somebody who just isn't used to dealing with extreme-ranked mages (which, to be fair, are supposed to be a lot rarer than we actually see them in the series): I can think of examples off the top of my head where Nanoha, Chrono, and Signum have all stacked attacks in advance.
That's what I was going for. Mages as powerful as the Aces are utter anomalies. We're kind of led to believe that they're not, since we see the story unfold from their perspective, but most mages are nowhere near their power.

The invaders are used to killing Bureau clerks and foot soldiers. Not the Aces, so it was fitting that the recon lieutenant would severely underestimate Fate.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DezoPenguin View Post
I'm intrigued by the team's armor and communications technology, grounded in mundane science rather than magic but obviously operating in the sci-fi scale of operations. Clearly there's a story there I'd be interested in hearing more about.

Thanks for posting, and glad to hear the writing urge is back!
My take on it is that the Bureau and it's parent government may run on magical tech, but the rest of the universe may or may not.

The invaders, much like the vast majority of Earth's humans, don't have Linker Cores. So they can't use magic, but they're much more advanced technologically than Earth's humans.

Not going to spoil too much, but the "main cast" of Reborn: A Magical War Chronicle should be Nena, Fate, Yuuno, Chrono, Hayate, Nanoha, Shari and Teana, with the Nena/Fate/Yuuno triad as the primary characters involved with the mysterious new Lost Logia.

The rest of the Loads and Loads of Characters are going to be relegated to background roles and cameos only. StrikerS gave us too many characters to work with, it's too hard to include everyone.
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Old 2009-11-02, 16:20   Link #18268
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Spoiler for OMG yay!:
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Old 2009-11-02, 17:59   Link #18269
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Quote:
Originally Posted by satashi View Post
Spoiler for omg yay!:
...

My eyes! D:
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Old 2009-11-02, 18:40   Link #18270
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Satashi View Post
Spoiler for OMG yay!:
Bah, when I read something I tend to take in everything within my field of vision, not just the line I'm reading. I always ruin stories for myself in this way
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Old 2009-11-02, 18:42   Link #18271
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 00-Raiser View Post
Bah, when I read something I tend to take in everything within my field of vision, not just the line I'm reading. I always ruin stories for myself in this way
That's an interesting talent.
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Old 2009-11-02, 19:06   Link #18272
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
That's an interesting talent.
More trouble than it's worth Since I take in the whole paragraph, when I looked at what Satashi wrote, 'Yuuno' and 'Chrono' registered in my brain first, completely ruining the surprise.

Sometimes I'll see an interesting looking line and I'll skip over everything else and read that line first. Especially bad when reading mystery novels when I run into something like this:

*Extremely long segment of exposition and explaining*

"Therefore, the culprit is Steve!"

So I know Steve is the culprit before I read what lead to this discovery Does this happen to anyone else?
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Old 2009-11-02, 19:19   Link #18273
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Originally Posted by Satashi View Post
Spoiler for OMG yay!:

YES


*starts up a parade*
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Old 2009-11-02, 19:21   Link #18274
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Satashi View Post
Spoiler for OMG yay!:
.........my word.....

GENDER HAS BEEN BENTED!!!!

Courtesy of Satashi, the apprentice of Bender :3
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Old 2009-11-02, 21:42   Link #18275
Satashi
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Amber Dreams III is finished. Thanks to Dezo for the help <3

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Old 2009-11-02, 22:39   Link #18276
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Originally Posted by Satashi View Post
Spoiler for OMG yay!:
MOAR. we demand it. :3
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Old 2009-11-02, 23:02   Link #18277
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Allquall View Post
I haven't written anything other than work-related crap for a long while, and my prose is really off. So, please pardon some very shitty shorts as I try to get my writing chops back into shape.

Spoiler for BATBED!:
Funny bits between Nanoha and Fate, but...poor bat! Magic damage, Fate, magic damage!!!

Ein: MEOW! (trans: "The woman just hates animals, I tell you!!!")

Edit: Not Allquall, Fate. Just in case anyone was wondering.

Quote:
@spawn NoW is next and currently underway, but my writing is absolute shite at the moment. I may release another Dusty Trail as a work-out, but I haven't given up on NoW.
Darned gainful employment! Can't write with it, can't buy food and shelter without it. Glad you're back writing in any case. And yeah, a new Dusty Trail chapter would be good for, er, shaking some of the dust off.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 00-Raiser View Post
More trouble than it's worth Since I take in the whole paragraph, when I looked at what Satashi wrote, 'Yuuno' and 'Chrono' registered in my brain first, completely ruining the surprise.

*snip*

Does this happen to anyone else?
It happened to me, too. I kind of "gulp" paragraphs when I read, so the first thing I saw was "Yuuno" and "Chrono" before really comprehending what was going on.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Satashi View Post
Amber Dreams III is finished. Thanks to Dezo for the help <3

You're welcome. Excellent, sweet fic! I still love the sig Rick did for you for it, too.
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Old 2009-11-03, 00:45   Link #18278
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Originally Posted by Satashi View Post
Amber Dreams III is finished. Thanks to Dezo for the help <3

lol Very nice references to Metroid XD
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Old 2009-11-03, 00:49   Link #18279
Satashi
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Originally Posted by ghazghkull View Post
lol Very nice references to Metroid XD
Ghaz gets bonus points!!!!
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Old 2009-11-03, 00:50   Link #18280
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Ghaz gets bonus points!!!!
*has achieved bonus points \o/*

*inserts Metroid music*
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