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Old 2008-05-11, 21:17   Link #9081
Cat Megex
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shaoron View Post
OH CRAP! how the heck am i going to make Kyonko carry Mitsuru!? (bamboo leaf rhapsody)
Fireman's carry?
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Old 2008-05-11, 21:24   Link #9082
Kaisos Erranon
Homo Ludens
 
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cat Megex View Post
Fireman's carry?
She can just carry him normally... he probably doesn't weigh much more than she does, and it gives her a reason to whine about her lot in life.


Anyway, more rewrites:

Spoiler for Chapter 6, Final: Closed Space:


This one needs serious work. I can't write shit for Itsuko...

Jintor, Dkellis, when you read this, I'd like you to edit this.

Edit: THANK YOU AEBLISS. YOU ARE MY SAVIOUR!

Edit edit: Thanks again, Aebliss. Otouto is the most EBIL little brother ever.
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Last edited by Kaisos Erranon; 2008-05-12 at 22:43.
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Old 2008-05-11, 21:30   Link #9083
Cat Megex
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaisos Erranon View Post
*snip*
Do I spy a Shana reference?

...Or are the words the same in Japanese?
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Old 2008-05-11, 21:32   Link #9084
shaoron
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Quote:
[Editor’s note: See! I couldn’t do the line after all. The transformation wouldn’t let me.]
really?


Spoiler for EDIT:


now that wasn't so hard now.. was it?

*runs away*
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Old 2008-05-11, 21:39   Link #9085
Kaisos Erranon
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cat Megex View Post
Do I spy a Shana reference?

...Or are the words the same in Japanese?
Well, I crossed it out, so it was a throwaway reference to Shana...

I don't THINK the words are the same in Japanese, but I'll look.

Edit: No it's not. I think "fuzetsu" means something along the lines of "Timestop Barrier" anyway.

Quote:
Originally Posted by shaoron View Post
really?


Spoiler for EDIT:


now that wasn't so hard now.. was it?

*runs away*
No, see, Kyon-chan can't look up her skirt because she doesn't have a skirt to look up. She's become a giant glowing ball.
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Old 2008-05-11, 21:41   Link #9086
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaisos Erranon View Post
No, see, Kyon-chan can't look up her skirt because she doesn't have a skirt to look up. She's become a giant glowing ball.
That ain't exactly it either. She's just engulfed in a giant glowing ball. It's still possible if you really try hard enough...
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Old 2008-05-11, 21:42   Link #9087
Kaisos Erranon
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Originally Posted by DJ_RockmanX View Post
That ain't exactly it either. She's just engulfed in a giant glowing ball. It's still possible if you really try hard enough...
No, judging by how the text reads, she actually has turned into a giant glowing ball. This does not happen in the anime, but...
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Old 2008-05-11, 21:44   Link #9088
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaisos Erranon View Post
Well, I crossed it out, so it was a throwaway reference to Shana...

I don't THINK the words are the same in Japanese, but I'll look.
'k .
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Old 2008-05-11, 21:47   Link #9089
shaoron
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Originally Posted by Kaisos Erranon View Post
No, judging by how the text reads, she actually has turned into a giant glowing ball. This does not happen in the anime, but...
yes but i made her glow just a bit FIRST, rise up (so she's still human and her "naughty bits" are still recognizable). after the dialogue, THEN she turns into a glowing ball
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Old 2008-05-11, 21:51   Link #9090
Kaisos Erranon
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Originally Posted by shaoron View Post
yes but i made her glow just a bit FIRST, rise up (so she's still human and her "naughty bits" are still recognizable). after the dialogue, THEN she turns into a glowing ball
Otaku stench.

I don't see what the point is anyway. I already wrote myself into a hole with the "be my bride" thing (and will be removing all references to that in my final edit), I don't need to derail Itsuko by making her into a RAGING LESBIAN.

Please note that, while the fandom considers Koizumi to be a FLAMING HOMOSEXUAL, he doesn't act like that in the novels. Therefore, Itsuko should not be as extreme as other fanworks (besides our own) depict her.

Just my two cents.
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Old 2008-05-11, 21:59   Link #9091
shaoron
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we already added the crotch grab and making kyonko dress up...

why not?

besides, weather this gets added or not, i don't really mind. but i was just trying to prove that you CAN add it... hehe... kk i'm going... *runs off*
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Old 2008-05-11, 22:22   Link #9092
Kaisos Erranon
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Originally Posted by shaoron View Post
we already added the crotch grab and making kyonko dress up...

why not?

besides, weather this gets added or not, i don't really mind. but i was just trying to prove that you CAN add it... hehe... kk i'm going... *runs off*
Why not? Because it derails Itsuko entirely too much.

Yes, you CAN add it, but I don't think we should.

Also, the bunny suit and the crotch grab were slightly more tasteful than "Hey, look at my underwear!" Also funnier.
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Old 2008-05-11, 22:52   Link #9093
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Originally Posted by Kaisos Erranon View Post
Why not? Because it derails Itsuko entirely too much.

Yes, you CAN add it, but I don't think we should.

Also, the bunny suit and the crotch grab were slightly more tasteful than "Hey, look at my underwear!" Also funnier.
What about instead of a "Look up my skirt." from Itsuko, she would move her hips in a way that would make Kyonko think, "Is she flashing me?"

That way, it's only speculation on Kyonko's part whether Itsuko is gay or not.
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Old 2008-05-11, 22:54   Link #9094
Kaisos Erranon
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Originally Posted by gadeel View Post
What about instead of a "Look up my skirt." from Itsuko, she would move her hips in a way that would make Kyonko think, "Is she flashing me?"

That way, it's only speculation on Kyonko's part whether Itsuko is gay or not.
We're still not doing it... it doesn't really work anyway.
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Old 2008-05-11, 22:57   Link #9095
gadeel
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Originally Posted by Kaisos Erranon View Post
We're still not doing it... it doesn't really work anyway.
Then can I use it for a fanfiction?
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Old 2008-05-11, 23:01   Link #9096
Kaisos Erranon
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Then can I use it for a fanfiction?
...Go right ahead.
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Old 2008-05-11, 23:01   Link #9097
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Okay people, Kaisos's word is final. We're not doing any Itsuko fanservice in this one. I even think some of it is going a bit too far and even unnecessary.
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Old 2008-05-11, 23:02   Link #9098
shaoron
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Originally Posted by Kaisos Erranon View Post
Also, the bunny suit and the crotch grab were slightly more tasteful than "Hey, look at my underwear!" Also funnier.
wait.. you LIEK CROTCH GRAB!?

hoookay.. getting freaky nao.... *shuffles away*





anyway...

net was down a while ago so couldn't post them.. so i'll post both of them...

Spoiler for BLR Part 2:



Spoiler for BLR part 3:



hope someone can make this even better..
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I am never gonna say good bye,
never run around is my body, never desert you is my blood
unknown to telling lies, nor known to hurting you
have rolled the rick over nine thousand times
yet never gonna give you up
so as I sing, UNLIMITED RICKROLL WORKS

Last edited by shaoron; 2008-05-20 at 20:55.
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Old 2008-05-11, 23:02   Link #9099
Kaisos Erranon
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Originally Posted by Un1234l View Post
Okay people, Kaisos's word is final. We're not doing any Itsuko fanservice in this one. I even think some of it is going a bit too far and even unnecessary.
Actually, Danchou's word is final, but...

Also, who are you?

Quote:
Originally Posted by shaoron View Post
wait.. you LIEK CROTCH GRAB!?

hoookay.. getting freaky nao.... *shuffles away*
I thought how I did it was funny. Just a momentary grab and Haruki laughing about it afterwards.
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Old 2008-05-11, 23:06   Link #9100
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaisos Erranon View Post
Actually, Danchou's word is final, but...
Don't worry, I'm a reasonable boss.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaisos Erranon View Post
Also, who are you?
Someone who's not posted here in nearly two months.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaisos Erranon View Post
I thought how I did it was funny. Just a momentary grab and Haruki laughing about it afterwards.
Haruki will laugh off a kick to the crotch methinks. Of course that's granted that someone is actually stupid enough to nail him there.
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