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Old 2013-07-01, 14:05   Link #3821
SmokinFerret88
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Join Date: May 2013
Location: The darkest corner with the best view...
Lookin' good so far DH, keep it up.
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Old 2013-07-07, 08:46   Link #3822
dniv
I destroy illusions
 
 
Join Date: May 2013
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Quote:
Originally Posted by demino_hellsin View Post
"Such misfortune!"

A young man's cries could be heard coming from a certain truck. This truck was all black. On closer inspection, it was less a truck and more of a van. This was the vehicle used by anti-skill in both deployment of operatives and arrest of criminals. This was a four wheel vehicle affectionately known as "the wagon". The wagon was wedged into an alleyway of district 7 of academy city. Considering how the brick walls were all scratched up and discolored, sparks literally flew when the driver of the wagon recklessly drove the vehicle into the alleyway. Inside, there was another voice other than that of a young man's. if one listened closely enough, this other voice was breathing heavily, as if it were in the middle of heavy activity. Those breaths in short gasps and from the pitch and tone, one could only tell it was from a grown woman.

"Urrghh! How did it end up like this!?"

The voice of the woman breathed heavily as she continued her labored breaths.

"That should be my line! I didn't ask for any of this!"

It was the young man, and he sounded very distraught.

"You looked like you were enjoying yourself just a little while ago though.", the woman flatly pointed out.

"I was relieved! I thought you guys were here to save the day! And me! Mostly me!"

The woman clucked her tongue at that comment. "Well that was assuming of you."

"I'm assuming!? Well I'm not the one going around cuffing people on a hunch!"

"Well we all make mistakes alright?"

The woman seemed to be pulling at the cute card as she played dumb in the slyest way she could.

"Don't you dare use that face with me! This position is uncomfortable enough as is!"

"It's not like I wanted to be in this position either!"

Both sighed exasperatedly. If only circumstances had been different.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~

Spoiler for A night you'd want to forget:
What Smokingferret said. This is great
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Old 2013-07-07, 09:06   Link #3823
SmokinFerret88
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The chatper...almost...completed....GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAH!~

Someone, please, shoot me!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 2013-07-07, 10:01   Link #3824
dniv
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SmokinFerret88 View Post
The chatper...almost...completed....GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAH!~

Someone, please, shoot me!!!!!!!!!!
Lol. I feel bad for you. I'm working on my story much less religiously so I find your work ethic rather impressive. Granted... it's partially because I have a job for the next 10 weeks ... my story/book needs better ideas... so I always like reading excellent things in order to get ideas...
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Old 2013-07-07, 10:25   Link #3825
SmokinFerret88
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Join Date: May 2013
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I've actually been slacking a lot lately, but that's mainly due to the fact that I'm distracted.

That I can blame on Tomb Raider, Mass Effect, and Battlefield 3. Yeah, those three = omg this game is awesome/omfg screw this game moments.

But it's pretty much done right now. Though I doubt a lot of people are gonna be happy with this entire chapter focusing around ORDER, but I could honestly care less. I didn't really have much time to give Sakurai and the rest a proper introduction; so this chapter's dedicated to putting a bit more depth into most of them. It's only fair in my opinion, since the previous chapter had all of ITEM, so doing the same for ORDER would give people some insight, you know?

The problem I have is that I don't know if I wanna end this chapter the way I have it. I could write more, but I've already extended passed my WC quota....so I'm at a loss.
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Old 2013-07-07, 11:16   Link #3826
demino_hellsin
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Don't think too much bout word count. Just let the story progress as it should. Still workng on tht set of circumstances myself. You could say in this case that Touma is really... "Unfortunate"
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Old 2013-07-07, 12:00   Link #3827
SmokinFerret88
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Word count helps me balance out things, progression, scene placement, those sorts of things. If I know I only have, say, 4000 words to use for one person's scene, then I apply the appropriate information. I'm wordy, yes, but the details and such that many people complain about are things that still serve a purpose in the scene.

Quote:
Still working on that set of circumstances myself. You could say in this case that Touma is really... "Unfortunate"
Dare I ask, how unfortunate are we talkin' this time?
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Old 2013-07-07, 14:12   Link #3828
R.LocK
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If you don't like how the chapter ends why not to continue it a bit further?
I don't have a problem with wordcount, eh... I'd drop a chapter if it has more than 17 parts, though... Hopefully, there won't be any chapter like that...except for transition chapters, maybe?
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Old 2013-07-07, 16:11   Link #3829
Ilidsor
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So... I'm stuck at an impass again. I just can't decide what fic I want to write. I seem to have a serious problem If anybody wants to cast a vote I'll probably just pick that one.

1. Touma's Busy Day: Touma has a really really busy day. A ton of problems including; a Kihara trying to kill him, a magician mind controlling/kidnapping Fukiyose, an underground magic cult trying to summon a demon, Kuroko getting kidnapped by her own stalker, an Islamic magic cabal of four beautiful women trying to force him to marry them all, and much much more. Just how much trouble can Touma's misfortune give him one on measly day?

2. (Currently untitled): Accelerator is forced to act as the body guard to a super popular idol. Can he withstand the forces trying to kill her, WORST's teasing, Last Orders jealousy, and his own incredible annoyance at the situation?

I already lost the temptaion to do those other fics... I'm sure I'll do them eventually though.
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Old 2013-07-07, 16:56   Link #3830
demino_hellsin
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@ferret: so much so that Touma will cry.

@Ilidsor: Touma's day sounds like Jack Bauer's 24
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Old 2013-07-07, 16:59   Link #3831
dniv
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilidsor View Post
So... I'm stuck at an impass again. I just can't decide what fic I want to write. I seem to have a serious problem If anybody wants to cast a vote I'll probably just pick that one.

1. Touma's Busy Day: Touma has a really really busy day. A ton of problems including; a Kihara trying to kill him, a magician mind controlling/kidnapping Fukiyose, an underground magic cult trying to summon a demon, Kuroko getting kidnapped by her own stalker, an Islamic magic cabal of four beautiful women trying to force him to marry them all, and much much more. Just how much trouble can Touma's misfortune give him one on measly day?

2. (Currently untitled): Accelerator is forced to act as the body guard to a super popular idol. Can he withstand the forces trying to kill her, WORST's teasing, Last Orders jealousy, and his own incredible annoyance at the situation?

I already lost the temptaion to do those other fics... I'm sure I'll do them eventually though.
2 if you make the idol meigo.

1 otherwise. I want to see both badly. They sound hilarious!!! XD
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Old 2013-07-07, 17:26   Link #3832
Ilidsor
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Quote:
@Ilidsor: Touma's day sounds like Jack Bauer's 24
That's sort of of the idea. It'll be 2-3 chapters each depicting 4-6 hours.

Quote:
2 if you make the idol meigo.
Nah I haven't seen the movie yet (I'm a english subs only purist), so I couldn't possibly do it right. The idol will be kind of shallow and expect Accelerator to act very subserviant and be all gaga over her. Which of course he won't be.
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Old 2013-07-07, 19:41   Link #3833
dniv
I destroy illusions
 
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilidsor View Post
That's sort of of the idea. It'll be 2-3 chapters each depicting 4-6 hours.



Nah I haven't seen the movie yet (I'm a english subs only purist), so I couldn't possibly do it right. The idol will be kind of shallow and expect Accelerator to act very subserviant and be all gaga over her. Which of course he won't be.
Lol that works too. I haven't seen the movie either actually. I'm only a stream watcher when I already pretty much know the source material. Railgun S might be the only exception to this because I already do it every Friday morning anyway...

I was talking about from PSP and other materials including the Endymion manga in english. But I understand, I can't wait to see #2. #1 sounds great as well. BTW I didn't say this here. I loved your other story: it was great about the maids.
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Old 2013-07-07, 19:59   Link #3834
SmokinFerret88
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Join Date: May 2013
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Aaaaaaaaaaaand it's posted!

A Certain World of Darkness - Chapter 11

Hope you all enjoy a look into the minds of Sakurai and the others.
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Old 2013-07-07, 23:09   Link #3836
Ilidsor
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Well Touma's Busy Day wins. I just started the detailed plan for it. I'm 75% done it and I've even managed to work in a little crossover from the Accelerator fic. They'll be happening on the same day.

Quote:
Originally Posted by SmokinFerret88 View Post
Aaaaaaaaaaaand it's posted!

A Certain World of Darkness - Chapter 11

Hope you all enjoy a look into the minds of Sakurai and the others.
Sweet, sucks to have no ITEM but I'll reserve my jugment until I read it tomorrow.
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Old 2013-07-08, 06:23   Link #3837
demino_hellsin
That one guy
 
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
@ferret: still too much purple prose dude. Overall I found your OC's balanced and interesting. They aren't quite as charming as one would like them to be but they do their job well. I did enjoy the six-wing bisection though. Cheers!
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Old 2013-07-08, 07:17   Link #3838
MrTerrorist
Takao Tsundere Cruiser
 
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Classified
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilidsor View Post
So... I'm stuck at an impass again. I just can't decide what fic I want to write. I seem to have a serious problem If anybody wants to cast a vote I'll probably just pick that one.

1. Touma's Busy Day: Touma has a really really busy day. A ton of problems including; a Kihara trying to kill him, a magician mind controlling/kidnapping Fukiyose, an underground magic cult trying to summon a demon, Kuroko getting kidnapped by her own stalker, an Islamic magic cabal of four beautiful women trying to force him to marry them all, and much much more. Just how much trouble can Touma's misfortune give him one on measly day?

2. (Currently untitled): Accelerator is forced to act as the body guard to a super popular idol. Can he withstand the forces trying to kill her, WORST's teasing, Last Orders jealousy, and his own incredible annoyance at the situation?

I already lost the temptaion to do those other fics... I'm sure I'll do them eventually though.
One please!
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Old 2013-07-08, 19:54   Link #3839
Ilidsor
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Well ask and you shall receive. Behold the power of a day off to write.

I was planning on doing several hours in a chapter but doing just one hour took a little over 3.5k words so I decided to just do one chapter an hour. Hopefully it goes well.
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Old 2013-07-08, 20:18   Link #3840
Ihaxlikenoob
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Join Date: May 2012
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Age: 20
Hah? So you're Icefriend? Didn't know lol.
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