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View Poll Results: Do you think physical attractiveness greatly impact a person's life?
Yes. 82 68.91%
No. 5 4.20%
Maybe. 23 19.33%
We choose our on destiny, we can do whatever we want no matter what! 9 7.56%
Voters: 119. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 2009-06-03, 15:45   Link #21
Narona
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kusa-San View Post
Humm Beautiful person have amybe some advantage in life but I think there is some disadvanatge too. I mean when you're beautiful, you're the center of attention and if you're someone who don't like being the center of this attention, it's really annoying. People always flirt with you etc...So even if there is some advantage, there is some disadavantage too.
It also a matter of norms and stereotypes around you where you live. There are some beautiful people in Slovakia and France, but not all are like the stereotypes I often hear about them.

If the people around you tend to think that for example a good looking person does this and that, likes this and that, acts like this and like that ; then if you don't fit this stereotype, it can really get annoying for you.

It's not only the view of "boys towards girl" and vice versa. If for example, a beautiful boy/girl is not interested in becoming a model, you will see some people of the same gender saying "That's a waste, if I was him/her I will take advantage of my appearance".. As If it was a given that if you look good, you have to do this and that accordingly to your appearance.

There are also some other problems. Like the fact, that "if the person cares about that", he/she can wonder if people like/love him/her because of his/her physical appearance (I guess you did met at least once a person who claims "look! I date this boy/girl! I am so lucky hahaha." as if that boy/girl was a trophy) or also for the rest.

I don't say that the beautiful girls and boys have a lot of disadvantages, but if you don't fit the clichés, you can face some.

Last edited by Narona; 2009-06-03 at 15:56.
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Old 2009-06-03, 16:13   Link #22
DingoEnderZOE2
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Attractive People have certain advantages over average and ugly people. The only advantages I see they have is attracting the opposite sex easily, and getting certain jobs.

While Average or ugly people just have to work harder to gain the privileges that Attractive people gain with just their looks alone.

In short Yes people who are born good looking does have it easier, but that doesn't mean those who aren't good looking don't stand a chance at gaining what good looking people can have.

At least that's my opinion.....
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Old 2009-06-03, 23:25   Link #23
npcomplete
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Originally Posted by rio View Post
Really ? i often hear American people say 'you are beautiful ' to girls or 'She is cute'.
Are they different from referring to others as bijin 'Beautiful Woman' in Japan?
Sorry, let me clarify. Yes, there are times when it's alright.. for example:
- a girl asks "How do I look?", you say "Wow, very beautiful!"
- nanpa time
- hanging out with friends and acknowledging that someone is "hot"

But I think this is different from:
- A young pretty female teacher gets hired in a school comprised of male teachers and middle-age female teachers. She gets publicly acknowledged by all of the staff as the "bijin of their school", in a very casual, matter-of-fact way. This would be extremely difficult to publicly express in the US.

- A group of ladies join a office full of male workers. In the US, it's acceptable to say that "it's refreshing to have women on our staff". It would be extremely difficult to publicly say something like "it's refreshing to have bijin on our staff"

- An airline acknowledging that first class passengers get service from bijin flight attendants
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Old 2009-06-04, 00:17   Link #24
Reckoner
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Well it is not simply good looks = success in life. It is not cause and effect, but a strong positive correlation.

Yes, unfortunately it is true that better looking people in life are often more confident, happier, and more successful. There are many studies to back this up I believe, however, I am not sure about their validity and I'm too lazy to look for them.
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Old 2009-06-04, 01:48   Link #25
LaceNFrills
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Physical appearance do indeed matters. :/ It gives people confidence and such.
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Old 2009-06-04, 01:54   Link #26
Vicious108
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Obvious yes. It may not define a person's life, but it sure as hell has a strong influence on it. You'd have to be really naive not to see that.

Of course, it's still possible to lead a happy/successful life without possessing a great deal of physical attractiveness. Possessing it still definitely helps though, especially considering most people's desires are directly linked to it.
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Old 2009-06-04, 02:45   Link #27
Theowne
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I think that it is obvious that physical attractiveness matters a lot, and I would even say it is one of the most important aspects to determining your happiness or success. I think that if you would ask people who possess a good deal of attractiveness, they may disagree, but I think there are a lot of subtle things in every day that are in fact affected by attractiveness that they may not realize. Even making friends. Subconsciously, people will tend to be more open to approaching new people depending on their attractiveness. If you ask them, they probably won't realize this, it's just something that they do without thinking about it. Even in something like job interviews, physically attractive candidates will make a more positive impression in the employers mind, even if they don't realize that this is the reason why.

On the topic of love: I'm as much of a hopeless romantic as anyone, but I think that "love" for most people is lust + varying degrees of friendship.
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Old 2009-06-04, 04:28   Link #28
Ending
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I like pretty things, so I also like pretty people. Likewise, I try to avoid ugly things, because those aren't necessarily what I want to be associated with. But! If uglyness isn't the most prominent association it's ok. E.g: some girl is ugly as hell, but a smart talker, then the first association isn't about her looks.
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Old 2009-06-04, 05:47   Link #29
Jazzrat
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With enough beers or alcohol, anyone can be pretty

Well, I believe how we look affects how we think especially since our race values physical appearance a lot especially with the potrayal of beauty = good and ugly = evil.

However, being pretty can only get you so far. Image and presentation will go a bit further than that followed by personality and experience that will take you all the way to the end.
Though different folks have different priority on this.
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Old 2009-06-04, 06:12   Link #30
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I think people who are overly self-conscious about looks and always think 'Man, I'm ugly!' will have a harder time making friends than someone who gives it not much thought and simply acts like they would.

Some of the funniest friendliest people I know could be considered unnattractive due to being a bit on the heavy side, but that doesn't stop them from making friends like no other. Being just attractive wouldn't get you many friends if you were either terribly shy or unsociable.

It may be true that you would be approached less in some circumstances, but how many friends are usually made by hand picking someone and walking up to them saying "Heyup, let's be friends." Isn't is more due to inevitable circumstances that you make friends? Like being put into groups during some activity, sitting at the same table in schools/college/university or getting to talk to one another in a similar situation of some such (at work/neighbours/etc). This usually leads to people talking to one another and getting to know one another better.

Regarding jobs though, attractiveness may hold the edge in getting a job as it's less about having a nice personality and more about being able to sucker the employee into believing that you're hard working. This would probably be easier achieved when having a pretty face to look at while you're telling them that you're 'greatest weakness' is that you 'work too hard'.
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Old 2009-06-04, 10:18   Link #31
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It's sad....it's sad.
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Old 2009-06-04, 10:28   Link #32
Kusa-San
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Narona View Post
It also a matter of norms and stereotypes around you where you live. There are some beautiful people in Slovakia and France, but not all are like the stereotypes I often hear about them.

If the people around you tend to think that for example a good looking person does this and that, likes this and that, acts like this and like that ; then if you don't fit this stereotype, it can really get annoying for you.

It's not only the view of "boys towards girl" and vice versa. If for example, a beautiful boy/girl is not interested in becoming a model, you will see some people of the same gender saying "That's a waste, if I was him/her I will take advantage of my appearance".. As If it was a given that if you look good, you have to do this and that accordingly to your appearance.

There are also some other problems. Like the fact, that "if the person cares about that", he/she can wonder if people like/love him/her because of his/her physical appearance (I guess you did met at least once a person who claims "look! I date this boy/girl! I am so lucky hahaha." as if that boy/girl was a trophy) or also for the rest.

I don't say that the beautiful girls and boys have a lot of disadvantages, but if you don't fit the clichés, you can face some.
Yep and it's really really something that bug me. The society impose you a norm and if you don't want to fit this norm then you're excluded of this society. People will think that you're strange etc...That's why I think that people who go against this kind of presure are people who are mentally strong. But sadly, there will be always prejudice in this world.
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Old 2009-06-04, 12:11   Link #33
Lolipopo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kusa-San View Post
Humm Beautiful person have amybe some advantage in life but I think there is some disadvanatge too. I mean when you're beautiful, you're the center of attention and if you're someone who don't like being the center of this attention, it's really annoying. People always flirt with you etc...So even if there is some advantage, there is some disadavantage too.

Personnaly, I'm not someone who judge other people on their appearance but I will not deny that I prefer good looking people over bad looking one and I think it's the same for everyone. I think it's important to take care of himself and the most important thing is that you're alright with yourself
That is quite the contradiction, don't you think? Judging and prefer usually go as a package, so it is either a or it is b.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kusa-San View Post
It also a matter of norms and stereotypes around you where you live. There are some beautiful people in Slovakia and France, but not all are like the stereotypes I often hear about them.

If the people around you tend to think that for example a good looking person does this and that, likes this and that, acts like this and like that ; then if you don't fit this stereotype, it can really get annoying for you.

It's not only the view of "boys towards girl" and vice versa. If for example, a beautiful boy/girl is not interested in becoming a model, you will see some people of the same gender saying "That's a waste, if I was him/her I will take advantage of my appearance".. As If it was a given that if you look good, you have to do this and that accordingly to your appearance.

There are also some other problems. Like the fact, that "if the person cares about that", he/she can wonder if people like/love him/her because of his/her physical appearance (I guess you did met at least once a person who claims "look! I date this boy/girl! I am so lucky hahaha." as if that boy/girl was a trophy) or also for the rest.

I don't say that the beautiful girls and boys have a lot of disadvantages, but if you don't fit the clichés, you can face some.
Hmmm, i think you are confusing stereotyping with people thinking of highly of you. And if you do not meet those high standards, then it can get annoying for someone and put him on a place, where he might not want to be. But this does not apply much to physical apperanace. It applies more to qualites and charisma one has.
Let's be honest, a lot of people are still divided. We stick to these rigid circles of friends based on sports we play or hobbies we like or how attractive or unattractive we are. When's that gonna change? Probably never. That's human nature. People stick to their own kind. But if it is "so hard" for someone, then they should change it. And they will not get excluded or being labeled as something weird or of that sort.
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Last edited by Lolipopo; 2009-06-04 at 12:21.
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Old 2009-06-04, 12:17   Link #34
Kakashi
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Heh, I'm just wondering what norm he's talking about. The only norm placed on good-looking people is to be good looking. That's not hard as long as they stay healthy. I'm pretty sure if an attractive person pursues a career in academia rather than modelling or whatever, people will be even more impressed.

It's not like this "whole package" is a rare thing either, half the people I know are well groomed and have the brains to back it up. Depressing really.
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Old 2009-06-04, 12:40   Link #35
Kusa-San
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lolipopo View Post
That is quite the contradiction, don't you think? Judging and prefer usually go as a package, so it is either a or it is b.
There is a diffrence between judging someone and having a preference. So it's clearly not a contradiction. The norm I'm talking about, is the norm that the society impose you. When you're beautiful, you need to do that or that etc...When you're ugly, you can't sing well etc..(see Susan Boyle)
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Old 2009-06-04, 12:51   Link #36
Lolipopo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kusa-San View Post
There is a diffrence between judging someone and have a preference. So it's clearly not a contradiction. The norm I'm talking about, it the norm that the society impose you. When you're beautiful, you need to do that or that etc...When you're ugly, you can't sing well etc..(see Susan Boyle)
It is a contradiction, you say that it does not affect you and yet you prefer the handsome people. This is a contradiction.
What are you talking about? Boyle can sing and everyone acknowledged that. About her past, she just hit the wrong doors, doors that were looking for beautiful people, not for ones that were looking for people that could actually sing in an opera tone.
And again, what norm? Society is consisted of people you know, there are not laws or rules, that point out to beautiful people you should do this and that. It is up to everyone. It just seems to me that there is going a "oh it is so hard being beautiful" mantra around here. It is not.
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Old 2009-06-04, 12:57   Link #37
Kusa-San
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Not it's not. If you can't understand the difference then I can nothing for you. No you seem to not have seen Suzane Boyle prestation. At the begining, the judge were like "Her, she is ugly so she can't sing well" and they even admit that themself later. So it's a good example of prejudice due to the norm of our society. And there is indeed a norm in society. In French Society you have not the same norm as in African society.


And it's clearly not that easy to be beautiful. See post above.
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Old 2009-06-04, 13:04   Link #38
Lolipopo
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Not it's not. If you can't understand the difference then I can nothing for you.


And it's clearly not that easy to be beautiful. See post above.
You said, that it does not affect you and yet it does. How can i not understand it? XD
Just because a post says that it is "hard" to be beautiful, i am supposed to go along with it, while i am more keen on believing that it is not hard, because guess what? People do have choices NOT to let any norm "impose" their views on them. If certain people are weak, that does not mean everyone is.
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Old 2009-06-04, 13:20   Link #39
Kakashi
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kusa-San View Post
And there is indeed a norm in society. In French Society you have not the same norm as in African society.
Yes, in general the more materialistic a society gets the more important things like status symbols, looks and possessions become.

Quote:
And it's clearly not that easy to be beautiful.
Life isn't that easy, sure, but rarely do good looks somehow make it more difficult...just different, and more often than not better.

I suppose at the very base level, like in nature, you would be right. Birds with the biggest and brightest feathers find it easier to attract a mate, but at the same time they're spotted more easily by predators. Humans tend not to have that problem though.
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Old 2009-06-04, 13:36   Link #40
Kusa-San
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No I don't agree. When you're ugly or beautiful your life may be more difficult. Why ? Simply because you're in an extrem. There is two extrem here the beautiful people and the ugly people. When you're in one of these extrem then you're shining in the dark. People have their attention on you even if you don't want to have these attention.
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Last edited by Kusa-San; 2009-06-04 at 14:04.
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