On a certain day, Song Shuhang accidentally joined a deeply afflicted Xianxia chuunibyou(Year 2 middle school disease) chat group, the group members inside all address each other as ‘fellow daoist’. Their contact cards are all either Sect Master, Cave Master, Spiritual Master or Heavenly Expert. Even the group master’s missing pet dog named Great Devil Dog abandoned his home. They chat all day about things like concocting pills, intruding mysterious territories, martial arts experiences and more.

One day, he abruptly realizes after lurking for a long time that…… In this group, every single group member is actually a real cultivator, with the ability to move mountains and drain seas, the kind that can live for thousands of years!

Ah ah ah ah, his worldview has utterly collapsed in a single night!

monster dog Azuki Bean Bean is a womanizer that goes after human girls and likes to annoy his owner, Feather Supple Child has a very twisted sense of what is good, bad or pleasurable, Seventh from Fu makes some extremely questionable vows, White Crane is blind from love...

If you are making a movie, you want a professional scenario writer - not an amateur web novelist. And worrying about number of characters he writes each day is...

White was in closed door mediation for the last 150? years, and the chat group sends Song Shuhang to pick him up so that he can help him acclimate to modern day. White used to not be able to turn off his charm, I think? So everyone felt uncomfortably attracted to him, regardless of their usual gender preference, but he's better about it these days. He's also got the craziest luck. Even if he just says "I want X", then some circumstance tends to occur immediately which results in him getting X. This is troubling because it's not always safe for the people near him, so spending time around White is a bit of a double-edged sword.

Mt. Yellow's True Monarch did some stuff to help as well, he supplied the vehicles (+parking garage) in order to let White learn to drive. (White likes to try new stuff out.) There was also one of these tractors in the parking garage, which White liked so much he forcefully invited most of the people from the CCG to take part in a tractor racing competition. Well, some of the forcefulness of his invitation came from the fact that the cultivators were using an image pack of White's expressions as emojis. Which were photos taken by Soft Feather and Shuhang while White was unconscious, and they were playing with his hair and using their hands to make different facial expressions.

1. Soft Feather is too immature. Also, she has a scary dad and Shuhang doesn't actually seem romantically interested in her.
2. Chuchu and Shuhang seem to have immediately friendzoned each other, despite later living in close quarters with just each other for about 2 or 3 weeks. Maybe because Shuhang experienced her whole life in a dream.
3. Nine Lights? (Bald 6th stage girl on the mysterious island) has the downside of not actually being remember by Shuhang at all, despite that whole pocket reality thing? where they got married and had a couple children.
4. Onion girl basically just exists to get hit with unluckiness, but hey, maybe she'll be able to keep her body this time around, even if she's not using it at the moment. She is with Shuhang constantly, and with her being rooted in the enlightenment stone, Shuhang won't actually let her run away. Shuhang also experienced most of her life in a dream, but there was about 200-300 years of being an onion on a cliff, so he mostly just learned about boredom.
5. Glasses-wearing book-loving girl who lives in ignorance in a created illusion (by a 7th stage cultivator) of a long destroyed group of cultivators, of which she was a part, but is in fact a real living being, but not entirely human, since she's actually a fusion of spirit ghost (the same thing that Shuhang contracts with early on) and human, born at the time of the group's destruction. I can't remember her name, but she's 5th-stage or something, and practices a really annoying scripture that involves crying at things constantly. Also, unfortunately seems to be the only one that Shuhang is particularly attracted to.
6. Ah Shiliu/ Su 16 is my personal favorite, but until recently she had almost no screen time. But in the recent chapters, she's worried that Shuhang will catch up to her cultivation-wise. She also doesn't want him giving gifts to other girls.
7. There's also the classmate, but she's only interested in him because he's got personal zone of cool air around him and it's been a very hot summer.

1. Super attractiveness. He originally appeared in the form of a statue of himself (the form he took as part of his sealed training). Said statue ended up getting enshrined in a local temple, and ended up getting fought over by a number of rich people, more than one of them being male, with their attendant goons who fell in love with said statue. This attractiveness affects even his fellow cultivators, so very few heterosexual male cultivators are willing to stay in his presence for any extended amount of time. Thankfully, ever since he's ascended to the 7th stage, he's been able to control it, so Shuhang didn't end up gayer than a rainbow.

2. Occasionally would absentmindedly think about things in the middle of everyday life, leading him to trip on thin air and fall over. As a 7th stage cultivator, that generally ends up resulting in a huge explosion and attendant crater. White's got a lot of practice in his earth manipulation arts...

3. Loves mechanical stuff. Unfortunately, he's also addicted to taking them apart to see how they work, and while he always confidently puts them back together, he'd also never get them right the first time. Given that this is the modern era now, he's taken apart more than a good household's worth of appliances so far.

4. This leads to one of his signature tools: the one-use flying sword mark x. Senior White's also a genius in terms of formation crafting, which he takes advantage of by basically producing flying swords at a whim out of tree branches and whatnot. His typical use for these "one use flying sword mark x" is to dispose of the results/evidence of his little habit of taking stuff apart, namely by sending them into space on a course out of the solar system. What's been sent into space by these wooden swords made from twigs on a whim include a multitude of household appliances, various mechanical crafts from the past, and a snake demon who pissed him off...

5. Unbelievable luck. This was basically already covered so I won't go much further into it.

There are more, but those are generally the basic ones

Nine Lights is a Buddhist Monk who has taken her vows (vegetarianism, celibacy, etc...), hence the shaved head. The whole arc involving her on the Secret Island was that she had a list of old unfulfilled desires from before she took the vows, and for cultivators, one of the major things that should be done to optimize your condition for ascension to later ranks is to fulfill old promises and desires (this is one of the main issues plaguing Seven Talismans. He made so many promises in his youth that he has to rush to fulfill them before he can properly level up). Everything Nine Lights was doing with/for Shuhang was basically just checking off said list of desires from the past.

The book girl, YeSi (translated into something like Leaf Thought) of the Jade Water Sect has the issue of being considered the same as a spirit ghost in a number of ways, including the ability to be contracted (forcibly without her consent) like any other spirit ghost. Plus, as she's a lv5 cultivator and can be counted as a high class spirit ghost, it means that she'd be quite valuable to many high level cultivators. Thus, if she leaves the Jade Water Sect, any high level cultivator who happens upon her would be able to recognize her as a spirit ghost and forcibly contract her, and there'd be nothing either she or Shuhang could do about it. What's more, spirit ghosts can share their sensory data with their contractors, so if she gets contracted, they'd also have to contend with the fact that there'd be a third party basically here any time YeSi and Shuhang were to get intimate, a thought that really creeps Shuhang out. Therefore, she couldn't go with Shuhang when he left the Jade Water Sect.

That said YeSi is the only girl so far to have shown to have something akin to a clear romantic relationship with Shuhang thus far. It's to the point where she proposed to be his "paired cultivation" "cultivation partner". A note for those unfamiliar with the genre, but "cultivation partner", in xianxia, is basically a married couple (or at least lifelong partners in all things), with "paired cultivation" basically being sex (with certain cultivation benefits). The two basically ended up deciding to go for being probationary cultivation partners for now, with paired cultivation being reserved for until they've become official partners. After the revelation of YeSi's true nature, Shuhang had more than once regretted the fact that "his first love turned into a long distance relationship." Still, Shuhang did trade an ancient arm guard to the master of the Jade Water Sect (the 7th level who created the illusion in the first place), and said master was last seen planing to use formations to modify the arm guard and give it to YeSi to made her unrecognizable as a spirit ghost. As of the latest raw, YeSi also just told Shuhang that she'd be sent out of her sect to do a job for the sect master, and that she'd be visiting Shuhang when the time comes, so...

When he's bored, or just whenever he feels like it, he enters mediation in which he can't be roused from, basically a smaller scale version of his long term mediation. Shuhang has to call him up on a flute to get the answering machine message about how long the mediation will be. This mediation sometimes generates a physical illusionary world, with things from White's past.

That said, Shuhang benefits massively from having White around, and Shuhang's luck is almost as ridiculous. Recently most cultivators he meets have a "he started cultivating two months ago?" reaction.

Could you clear up the difference between the two? swords/blades/daggers that Shuhang uses already and the type of sword that he thinks it would be coolest to use? I've noticed that he's despaired a few times over not having much talent towards sword scriptures like Chuchu does.

What's Book Navigation problem with "tyrant knife Song One" dao name, why doesn't he like it? How is it similar to "crazy knife 3 waves"?

First of all, you need to understand Shuhang's personality and general temperament, as well as his personal image of what kind of cultivator he wants to be. Shuhang is very much a bookworm/scholarly type, and his temperament tends toward being kind and charitable. This is reflected in his personal image of the kind of cultivator he wants to be: a kindly, scholarly, and gentlemanly type.

Now let's analyze the title of "Ba Dao Song Yi", shall we? A more nuanced translation of that title (which MTL doesn't really do great justice of) would be something along the lines of "The Tyranical Sabre, First/Eldest of the Song Family". Think for yourself on how well such a title meshes with Shuhang's ideal, outlined in the paragraph above...

On the subject of the name's similarity to Mad Sabre Three Waves (which I think is a better fit), first I have to make a note that the character for wave, "Lang", is in fact 3 Waves' family name (this was noted in some chapter, I forget which). Thus, a different interpretation/translation of his title could very well be something like "The Mad Sabre, Third of the Lang Family". Thus, the similarity... (Also, if you read the part leading up to that, you'd see that the prototype version of the "Tyrant Sabre Song One" name that White Senior originally came up with was "Tyrant Sabre Song Third", quite obviously built to imitate 3 Waves' name, until Shuhang complained "what do you mean Song Third, I'm an only child")

Newest chapter, I can't tell if Mad Sabre Three Waves is messing with Shuhang because he's annoyed with him or if Soft Feather's father really did start out as an insect. Shuhang asked the chat group if anyone there had any experience with forming cocoons. Edit: MSTW was just being an idiot again, like usual. That said, they did send a butterfly demon over to Shuhang to instruct him in cocooning. Everyone seems tickled pink by the idea of a human forming a cocoon. I imagine Shuhang will have another dream in which he'll experience the life of a being he has a connection to. Probably the creature whose body was used to create this potion. MTL keeps translating these devils? as "nine you" so I'm curious as to what a good translation of them would be.

Shuhang is a lesser and safer version of White. Basically, if you are walking with White and a meteor crash down, 100% the meteor is going to hit you. And if you are walking with Shuhang and a meteor crash down, 90- 100% that the meteor is crashing into ShuHang:heh:

is actually "orz"