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You guys I just solved everything. First, my semi-serious idea:
Every depiction of 1998 is a forgery. Amakusa Juuza is a self-insert alternate version of Toya. It's awesome.
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Now for my troll idea:
Toya Hachijou...is OTHER BATTLER. He wasn't actually stillborn, but was raised by...uh, someone else. Asumu's family or something. And he grew up to hate the Ushiromiyas all villainously and such. He did the murders, pretended to be Natsuhi's baby to troll her on the phone, and even mass-produced Sakutarou in order to spite Rosa's and Maria's relationship. He did absolutely everything. He managed to be on the island by taking up the free spot Shkanon allows, killed Battler, and took his place. Washing up later and being found by Ikuko, he took up the identity of Toya Hachijou, and reading the Message Bottles and writing his own Forgeries convinced him that he was actually Battler. Everything he remembered was pretty much entirely untrue because Amnesia doesn't fucking work that way. Everything about the logistics of Umineko is solved. And Ange was never reunited with her brother in any sense. Screw her.
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