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Old 2008-05-18, 07:35   Link #3
PhoenixFlare
The Resurrector
*Author
 
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Satte ... In a bid to oust Aaron out of his seat ...

MAXIMUM BACKLOG BREAKER!

(This combines everything I've missed for the past two months till the current day )

Replies are sorted according to person, so it's easier.

==========

Quote:
Originally Posted by LoweGear View Post
FINALLY

Managed to finish another update to the Blue Magician Julie Liu Ming's profile, here's Part V

Spoiler for Spells:


The Wizard Spells make Julie the Ninja of Ninjas indeed.

Strike Balls made me cringe at first, but luckily the spell's effect wasn't what I had in mind.

And thumbs up for the creative Infinite Effects Studio! It'd be a great distraction indeed when suddenly a sword is on fire but no heat is felt ("GHOST FIRE!").

Quote:
Originally Posted by LoweGear View Post
YATTE YARUZE!!!

Final Update of Ninja of Ninja Julie Liu Ming's profile is up!

Spoiler for Special Moves and Trivia:
Somehow, Seven Swords remind me of the Chinese movie, though the link seems to be absent here.

Anyway, this profile is LOVE and WIN!

Cannonball Shoot is a neat move (I was sort of imagining a trampoline ), Iron Blizzard is most painful from the description (and using three rings is scary, the speed must be hypersonic ), Sturm Bolt is quirky as it is effective (anti-stupid ), Buster Homerun is most nicely thought out , and OMNI Blade is scary (*sends a prayer for whoever gets hit by that for invoking the persona Trisha out into the battlefield, including Sven* ).

Julie's interpersonal relationship is very much understandable (but Trisha is just plain scary! ), but hopefully, Gilliam Aker can help resolve that once and for all. And this calls for MUCH WANT NAO!

Quote:
Originally Posted by LoweGear View Post
SURPRISE PROFILE POSTO!!!!!!!!!

Now for something the IRC guys know, and now posting the first part now:

Spoiler for The Shattered Girl:
I'm surprised you actually use the names, and combining the two as well.

Anyway, Eppy-chan is made of sweet love and niceness . Despite her shattered self (apt name, by the way), she finds herself an optimistic girl and happy-go-lucky (well, practically, unless Anger, Sadness, and/or Fear gets agitated) under the care of the Belkarangers. I originally thought she'd be more attached to Julie because of the similarity in their personality, but Mayura seems to take the role of her mother very nicely.

Working in a museum sounds like a fitting job for Eppy (and she can filch multiple entry fees to boot ).

Quote:
Originally Posted by LoweGear View Post
... I don't know what possessed me to finally write this, but DAMN do I feel good doing so, even though it may not be my best work.

And now, without further ado...

"Super Hero Time!

Starts Now!"


Spoiler for Prologue:
I laugh a lot in this short chapter, especially about Asagi's antics with Sergeant Griggs . And their burning and explosive fire is quelled not by such a small fry like Griggs apparently .

GO GO MADOUKISHI SENTAI!

Quote:
Originally Posted by LoweGear View Post
And continuing from the last chapter...

Belkarangers Task One, Hajimarimasu!

Spoiler for Part One:
At first, I thought the narration was about the antagonist for the Belkarangers, but it ended up being ... Gilliam Aker?!

Definitely nice save as Mayura has said! And no doubt, in a newly-wed bridal position ... *cries tears of joy for Julie*

*runs*

Quote:
Originally Posted by LoweGear View Post
*sneaks in*

*drops package*


Spoiler for Confinement:
This made me go and at the same time. It's a nice opening to Kaylin and Glock's meeting. Though it started out with bad blood, I'm sure the improvement is underway for the eventual *static*. Nice going with Glock manhandling Kaylin () and getting access to her private storage. I wonder, what does she keep in there ... maybe *static* and *static* or *static*?

*flees*

Quote:
Originally Posted by LoweGear View Post
Now for something new... it's kinda rare for me to dwell more on worlds than on characters, but this bit is related to TASK ONE

Thus, without further ado:

Spoiler for Rainbow Mirage:
*thumbs-up!*

It's not everytime that we see a world is described in detail, the only one I've read so far is TK's Planine. This presents yet another bloody conflict instigated by the Book of Darkness back before it went to Earth, and TSAB's darker side in employing the Arc against the Logia. Is Kaylin simply prejudiced against the Bureau after what Glock did to her?

Quote:
Originally Posted by LoweGear View Post
[Master Arm Locked]

Considering the initial concept, I kinda feel this next scenario is somewhat... rushed. Then again it wasn't meant to be long so...

Presenting a short humble scenario entitled:

Spoiler for Thirst:
LOWEPIC! MAIXSMITH! SWEETCHEESIUM!

The scene builds up very nicely, and I can certainly understand the indirect kiss-u. I went "Awww~" when Mai went for more.

Nice Wesson-Julie combo double team to make the scene possible! (And thanks for the clarification for that )

MOAR!

P/S: Are you sure you don't want to change the title to "Lust" instead?

*flees at ludicrous speed*

==========

Quote:
Originally Posted by Keroko View Post

Keroko-kun:
Wow, I didn't think he'd actually do it, concidering I've got... what? 3 incarnations of myself in the thread already?

Keroko-chan:
No kidding, there's me, the impulsive think-before-you-act side of you, not to mention the *ahem* feminine side. Then there is Kerokun, your laid back 'lets not worry about that today, maybe tommorow' side, and then there is Keroko-tan, which is, well...

Keroko-kun:
Me in a nustshell when playing games.

Keroko-chan:
Yeah, that. Small tip people: When Keroko is building superweapons, he's not doing it without a reason. You can bet that as soon as the timer reaches zero, he'll fire the damn thing.

Keroko-kun:
Or several.

Keroko-chan:
You mean like when you payed Generals Death Valley with the China Nuke general and let your comrades handle the defenses while you leisurely build nukes?

Keroko-kun: Yup. Hmmm, fifteen nuke timers counting down. Ah, I loved that match.

Keroko-chan: .... yes, I can see where Keroko-tan gets it.


The sheer number of Kerokos is ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Keroko View Post
Type-0 Sentoukijin

Rebuilt of Uomo



Spoiler for Uomo:
The Rebuild of Uomo certainly features some nice (and quite flawless) integration of this combat cyborg into canon storyline. I thought she's a he, but I was proven wrong at the outset (it's the other way around). I like the trait about his deceptive capability, makes him a very efficient spy indeed .

I was wondering about the part where he gets personal growth from Subaru and Ginga, and then him doing infiltration that goes against these two. Wouldn't he be suffering from ... say, some sort of guilt? Being a double-faced member of both TSAB and NOD can be difficult most of the time.

His skills and spells are wonderful and certainly complement his role as spy and infiltrator and assassin . I personally think that if Kratos and/or Leona ever faces Uomo, an interesting battle of intelligence and counterintelligence is going to happen.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Keroko View Post
Whoogyaaaah! Long read! Action, drama, did the others survive? Will the Templars manage to escape? Questions questions.
Most questions will be answered in the next few chapters.

That is ... if my bluecheese juice supply didn't run out halfway through.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Keroko View Post
Needless to say, the best part in my eyes is of course the awesome Signum/Tesla battle against Grandia. And it was ended with true finishers. Definetely has my Seal of Aproval. :3
Ah, yes, thanks for the seal!

I was kind of worried that it might have led to Tesla being shafted in some scenes and that's kind of bad of me to do so <_<. Frankly, I have no idea how a tactician is supposed to function in frontline, except executing some moves that complement their allies', thereby boosting their battle prowess and chance of victory. All in all, the thinking cap managed that, somewhat, though I'm still feeling bad that Tesla isn't getting enough screen-time. Signum seems to be dwarfing Tesla in her shadow. Sorry. >_<

==========

Quote:
Originally Posted by humbug23 View Post
I swear, at this rate a songfic will come out based on these lively characters alone...

Not that this was swirling in my head while on a 45 minute ride which left my rear aching...
Now to recall those darn thoughts.
This song is a GREAT WIN!

==========

Quote:
Originally Posted by FlameSparkZ View Post
I just finished the drawing

Spoiler for somewhat big...:



Too bad I couldn't fit Altea there
Oh, well, I'll just do one with Koji and her

*runs*
... ULTIMATE CARAMELLDANSEN!

And that's a very nicely drawn pic!

Quote:
Originally Posted by FlameSparkZ View Post

It's amazing how a simple question can trigger all this...

Anyways...here's Chapter 23!

Spoiler for Chapter 23 - Codename: Heart Waver - Part 1:

Why does this chapter has this name? You'll find out in the next part

That's it for now
The next part should be posted soon, sicne most of it is already written, just needs to be revised and updated

But right now, I'm tired...
*goes to bed*
Very intriguing chapter. Me wonders what Koji wants to ask.

Quote:
Originally Posted by FlameSparkZ View Post
Well...seems like I can't finish this chapter in 2 parts

Anyway...here's part 2

Spoiler for Codename: Heart Waver - Part 2:


Mucho surprises indeed, especially Treize's condition. I didn't know the sleepiness and blur personality is a direct effect of her genes. Well, let's not get her grow up so fast .

And Koji's Heart Waver is a greater surprise, and an apt name for the skill. Guess Koji realizes that everyone likes him not because he's likable, but because of his power, and that's quite a blow to his psyche. The part on Relic #11, though, had me going , because it seems to go against canon. Then again, Jail might be conning Lutecia to believe that the Relic is needed to revive Alpino when it isn't really the case. :3

Very nice chapter, we need MOAR!

Quote:
Originally Posted by FlameSparkZ View Post
Okay, time to get the chapter over with

Here goes...
Spoiler for Codename: Heart Waver - Part 3:

It's not too cheesy, is it?
I hope this cleans things up...and maybe no hammer will fall down on me

Final Boss was somewhat revealed...I hope its 'partnership' with Scaglietti doesn't bring more problems...

And yeah, Koji has a weak spot for girls with long hair

~~~~

I'm thinking of making an inbetween chapter (aka Chapter 23a) focused on Zafira, as in "A day in the RF6", maybe even from Zafira's point of view.
To, you know, unshaft the Shafted One for a while

After that, work on the following chapter, "Second Date", that takes place a week or so after this chapter, jumping back into Maren's Route.
And with this chapter, Maren's older sister, Scarlet is finally introduced

Well...I'm gonna go relax over there...
*walks to a quiet spot*

EDIT: Changed the infirmary scene to adapt to the changes in the previous part
... Now, who's the one talking with Jail? This is sounding like the prelude to something really big.

Maren and Koji are sharing a closer relationship, it seems, after the meeting with Jail, which is a very good thing. Maren's female instinct is perking in the right wavelength, though, especially about Koji liking the "long-haired" females .

And to unshaft the Shielding Beast Zafira is a must!

Zafira: *growl* Finally, my own scene!



==========

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Wee New chars!

Spoiler for Daisy Thorn:


Daisy is certainly an interesting one. And her past-times made me go . Praying on Alan's "defective dating gene" had me laughing silly.

Nobody messes with this girl and gets away unscathed. Maximum firepower indeed .

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Spoiler for Rose:
I like Rose! Daisy is mean for shoving her to the front to tank fire, but that's what Rose is good at . Her spells would make head aches for the enemy, no doubt.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
-snip-[/spoiler]
This is a nice dish to let us have an overview of Kou and Shin, and my, aren't their tempers explosive? (I think this applies to most in the series, though .)

Nicely written aerial battle, but Vita and Felix botched this capture in a most unlikely and funny way . Nice save on the boy, and even nicer remark by Felix. I love "red-headed little shrew" a lot!

And the drive-through scene is funny like hell!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Spoiler for Part 3 YES THREE:
Zubov is a tricky guy, all right. No wonder Felix got a bit miffed at his reappearance.

I have to love the "interview" between Felix and the captive. Well done on the part! Pixy's mention of the good steak Felix cooks certainly is a nice addition to his already rich personality. Mm, and the everpresent Vita x Felix vibes feel doubly awesome!

And response team, go, go, go!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Since we seem to be on the topic of magic and such I might as well throw some of my own recent stuff into the fray to give some examples of new magic systems that are IMO at least balanced.

First off we have a very partial profile of a new OC but the big focus is the shooting arts of Planine.

Spoiler for Emil:
This is such a surprise. I thought I was reading about a person, but instead it turned out to be a profile of the world . You need updates!

Anyway, Planine certainly is an interesting world. It's medieval and modern at the same time, combining elements of both the Eastern and Western worlds. I like it that they use conventionals coupled with magic, especially when they launch bullets and arrows and magically amplify the speed for greater impact (reminds me of Lowe's Wizard Ring ), and it even allows them to circumvent TSAB's policies .

Very good thought in this.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Spoiler for Shin:
Ah, Kou's partner-in-crime . Quite the antagonist of Kou's more explosive temper, but that's what make them click, no doubt . Cracking jokes in the middle of combat is a plus point for his carefree personality .

I see that this style focuses on speed and stealth, as compared to the power of the Belkan style. And Shin makes the first character to ever use a kusarigama, I think. Very good!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Of course a magical world can't live on melee along so on that note we take a look at another school of magic from the 14th world via another of it's practitioners you all might also know.
Spoiler for Kou:


And this ends our little look at the magic stylings of the 14th world as envisioned by me I have one more OC from this world, but she'll be written up later and won't intro anything drastically different.
Ah, so this is why Kou is such a snappish and temperamental person. Dysfunctional family almost always has that kind of effect. But, I guess, if he wasn't in that kind of situation, he wouldn't have become the person he is today. That, plus he wouldn't meet the Whispering Death instructor if he's a happy little kid.

The school of Whispering Death being targeted as evil and slaughter-on-sight surprised me, but understandable. Assassins tend to get bad ratings even if they did a good job.

Kou's number of arrows is amusingly handwaivium (), but his spells are good and practical. One question though, what's the difference between Obstructing Fog and Concealing Haze? They sound and work similar effects to my understanding.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Alright PF here you go Cipher mostly finished Profile, the history will be filled in soon:
Spoiler for Cipher:
EXCELLENT WORK!

This delicious profile I can put to good use. The background is short and sweet (glad he's a purist ). And ranged specialist, roger on that account.

I must say his icy arsenal is going to prove very useful in the scenario I have. Expect a few Arctic Blasts and/or Breakers . North Wind had me laughing a bit, though .

"Subject to change" if you think up something wicked cool caught me off-guard there. Don't do anything drastic, or I'll hunt ye down!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Those of you on IRC might recall I mentioned this before, well I was serious and so I present the initial profile of someone that most of you might find a bit familiar with...
Spoiler for Albrecht Freiherr von Richthofen:


He'll be serving as a somewhat morally ambiguous antagonist in my new fic though he won't appear for a bit.
Ah, the Red Baron finally makes an appearance, and ... ANTAGONIST?! Oh dear, seems like Felix and company will be having their hands full handling him.

The history is rich and well-written, I certainly like the part where he retorts to his superior ("My dear Excellency, I have not gone to war to collect cheese and eggs ...") to get a reassignment, but his combat ability certainly shines during the battles he participated. His meeting with the Garm squadron is quite expected .

I'm surprised that being an antagonist, he's has a good sense of modicum and respect for his foes. Nice touch on him working with the lower classes despite being a higher-class.

The fated battle (if any) between him and the company is much anticipated.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Threads a bit slow at the moment isn't it?

Well whatever now seems as good a time as any to post up another random profile of someone that won't appear for like another two chapters in the story. Anyway I preset to you my stories wheelma--- errr woman.

Spoiler for Izumi Sato:

Way I see it just like the forwards "ripped off" the Aces people will now start ripping off the forwards since they're bound to have become rather famous... it's the cycle of life or magical plagiarism at least. Plus having someone zipping around on motorized roller skates smashing people with a polearm is just too much fin to write about for me to pass up.

Yeah, yeah I should be finishing off chapter two of my fic, but banging out all these profiles this is so much more fun and easier to do...
Now, Izumi is a character that totally blew me away when I read her (and it's not her bust size, which is quite nonexistent in the character image ). She blew me away because she's so unexpected and at the same time computes. It's not everyday when you see characters whose specialty lies in driving, and even has a Device that helps her in that! The spells, though, are . She must be the absolute last boss in Need for Speed or some racing game, quite unbeatable .

I think the TSAB's public property compensation increases annually by many folds ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Well it's done... and it came out nearly as long as the first one; 14.3k words total. Beware that this chapter lacks action of any sort and includes ALLOT of talking and just a bit of INTENSE INVESTIGATING ACTION. So without further ado Chapter 2: The Return of Atuwe!!!

Well no that’s not that title acutally its…
Spoiler for Welcome to the Jungle:
Ah, so it seems that Nanoha has been relegated to office duty, guess she's still having the side-effects from the damage. On the up side, she seems to have gotten herself better skills in breaking awkward conversations .

I had a good amount of laughter reading Makoto, Kou, and Shin's mental conversation on what they learnt about Felix and Pixy's "brighter" nature . Very well done, there! Pixy has some honed housecleaning skills, there.

And poor Kou, working the larger portion of the assignment meant for the team.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
And where we have part two of this bomb...

Spoiler for Part Two:
Practical Felix is practical, even considering to take tissues for DNA analysis . And great shot with the interrogation, sleek and sly .

And here comes Atuwe, one of the most hailed hacker of all! Then, the shafting begins ... and rather intense ones, too . First by Felix, and then by Irene . I have to give Irene two thumbs-up on her effortless action to set Atuwe on the right direction. Guess she's meaner than Felix is.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
And lastly
Spoiler for Part 3:


And lastly some author ramblings!

Not much action going on in this chapter and not much Vita either, but hey let’s face it investigations aren’t really her thing so what are you gonna do? So what WAS she doing for most of this? Taking allot of naps perhaps? Fear not though she’ll be back to show off what she’s best at next chapter… indiscriminate destruction.

Felix of course is still around plenty being the main character and all and a couple of background guys of mine get some spotlight too mainly Atuwe and O’Neil who shows that yes he DOES do something besides nap in his office all day. Irene is around quite a bit too and her and Felix seem to get on rather well…

This chapter acutally ended up bigger then I expected and I even edited some scenes out that I felt didn’t really add allot to the plot and were holding up my progress. It was mostly some Vita/Pixy stuff and a bit of fluff about the Recon teams forming up which I admit in this final product feels a tad forced and rushed, but I was tired of this chapter and wanted to move on. I may write these up later as Sound Stages of a sort. (Probably not being the lazy bum I am)

When will the next chapter arrive you ask? Why when it’s done of coruse!
You deliver another amusing chapter that's filled with dry hilarity and sarcasm, and the closing isn't lacking them .

Felix seems to have inherited some of O'Neill's manipulative habits, seen in his ability to basically shove a reluctant Kou into line . I wonder who the "four" guys are ...

And does Atuwe always ramble to himself?

Do write faster, or I'll have to clamp your rear to the computer ... permanently.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
LOL bangwagon! So yeah since everyone is rebuilding there OC recently I figured why the hell not?

So I present first of "Rebuild of Felix"
Spoiler for Felix:


And Just to round out my Power Trio I finally present you with a Proper (mostly) complete Profile for...
Spoiler for Solo Wing Pixy:


Yeah, yeah Fic I know but these are more fun to do and I don't have to think as much while I'm taking my finals Profiles for Keller, Macmillan, and Miller are in the works and will probably appear short as well. Anyway I'll comments on some of the posts today later.
Mm, nice double profile bluecheesium !

Felix certainly lives up to his reputation depicted in your current fic, being sarcastic whenever he can (which seems to be almost always). A good smattering of sarcasm always livens up the atmosphere . His juvenile record was a little unexpected, but I guess everyone does have a mean streak in their life at one point or another. Glad he found his path after all those years. The spells are as practical as the person is.

Pixy gives me a little bit of a creep initially, what with annihilating his enemies single-handedly. Even more terrible is his early years where he's somewhat of a mean terrorist. Luckily, he manages to see things in perspective and leaves his past behind, which no doubt leads to the improvement in his mood and attitude . Some habits die hard (he's still spoiling for a fight, it seems, and now taking Vita with him!), in any case, but at least he's much better than he was previously . Nice quote, by the way. Pending spell list just spoils this wonderful profile .

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
Soooo who wants to read my long ass spiel about Electronic Warfare in Nanoha and my prototype character for the specialization?

*crickets can be heard*

Well screw you I'm posting it anyway prepare to be buried under an avalanche of technical and tactical jargon maggots!

First off we have an 3,000 word in character essay as a primer!
Spoiler for Tactical Babble GO!:
That was fun to ready wasn't it?! Now let's see how we can apply all this wonderful tactical theory can be applied to a character!


Spoiler for Rebecca Keller:


Ahhh that felt good! I just love droning on and on about tactics and strategy, wouldn't you all agree?
*Everyone in the thread posters and OCs alike can be seen to be asleep with many of them drooling.*
Well I though it was interesting.
*pops a bubble*

Uh, huh?

*looks around*

Er ... No, I didn't fall asleep, honestly I didn't! (Only napping, yep, it's napping!)

Rebecca-san wakes me up with her big *static*!

*runs*

Good going with the spiel, skimmed through and detected some things that I can use for Kratos/Leona .

Rebecca is as good for an ECM as she is in looks (*ahem*). Her spell arrays are definitely designed to jam and confuse Device functions and spells, and that makes her an excellent support . Let's see if Kratos can learn a trick or two from her ... even if his field involves little in this area (he's more into detection, surveillance, illusion-breaking, counterintelligence, and hacking), but hey, improvements are always welcome.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tk3997 View Post
So the OC is one year old eh I’ve been here like half that time, but it stills seems to have flown by awfully fast… So we managed 24,256 posts in a year let’s break that down:

That means we averaged:
2021 post a month
70 Posts per day
2.7 Post and Hour
Or 1 post every 21 minute

That’s either something to be proud of or slightly scary…

Anyway since I felt the need to acutally put up some content to mark the day I decided to do a little short side story… that ended up being 4,000 words. This needs a bit of set up it takes place during the as yet unpublished Chapter 3 of my fic and is a bit a side story/background/intro fic. In the end it turned out to be a sort of Izumi intro fic more then anything else… basiclly I wanted a break from what I was doing and felt like writing a car chase and this was the result.

Spoiler for "Drabble":
I think my reply to you is the longest in this backlog breaker.

Anyway, this is why I say Izumi blows me away! Excellent driving coupled with excellent attitude, and she's a badass in her own right! Firsthand experience with her driving skills is bound to upset the stomach and kill the appetite, not to mention the possibility of making motion sickness an infectious disease with her being the main causative agent!

Poor Rico, Alice, and Alan, and luckily Rico was quick enough to cut off her protest.

==========

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aaron008R View Post
Been a while...

I'll tackle the backlog at a late time, but for now, I have to post my entry to Rebuilt.

-Entry to Rebuilt-

~Serena Avenir~


Spoiler for Serena:
This profile needs a serious update!

Serena is lovely as she is effective. Thumbs up for the "not-an-elitist" Serena, because I think we've had enough of those in the stereotypical anime, but she's also "not-a-socialist" Serena, which is a nice combo.

Siegerion sounds like a good device (would've loved to hear the butler-ish speeches ). And yes, over-thinking is bad.

Kha, out with the Rebuilt already, we need this gal in action!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aaron008R View Post
Back on business...:3 =3 >3

The Divine Hammer of Inspiration strikes in most unexpected moments.
And it just struck me a while ago. Here's the result

Spoiler for Near Epilogue of GenerationS:


I hope I got Keroko-chan right! ><
Anyways, this may or may not be part of GenerationS when it's nearing completion. But the chance is high.
And I got to try characterizing Grandis for the first time properly.

>:3

How was it?><
One sentence: KEROKO IS CUTE!

Looks like Grandis is a magnet even though he doesn't want to be, and this isn't helped by the fact that Nanoha and Fate takes every opportunity to amplify the effect. Settling down seems easier for Grandis now that he's gotten over his past.

MOAR HAYANDIS NAO!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aaron008R View Post
Will tackle the backlog later. But for now, it's time to introduce the 'Prince'.

~Rebuilt of~
~Grandis Lacetti~


Basic Stats:
-snip-

I know, I know. He's seemingly way different from the cocky and confident Grandis that we all knew from the past. But I just had to do this. I felt something missing every time I reread Grandis' old profile. And I found out that 'I wanted to do something very different'. The old Grandis was likeable, sure. But there was a degenerancy with him that bugged me. Like with Aurion, I intend to completely break apart the common character mold and even some of the tropes in order to get a result as uniquely my own as possible! And so, Ohji Grandis came to be. How often does the non-hotblooded cool guy get the main girl? Don't worry, he's just more (MUCH more) refined now. The interactions with Hayate later on will still entail the same roguish flair. And I'd have to apologize in advance if anybody is planning or my have already written anything that involves an "Ore" Grandis. This is how he is now. And I intend to make him as likeable a character as possible! Oh. And making HayateXGrandis a success is a must too. ><

Comments? He's much, MUCH less HAXX now compared to the old version. Though I'm open to some more suggestions. Thanks in advance.


EDIT: Added pic.:3
Ah, certainly a nice Rebuilt, and it's Aaron-esque in all its glory.

You've gone through him with me before, so I don't think there's anything else to add. He looks better than the previous profile, though I'm interested in Carim's admirer, Zamzeed.

And also ...

HAYANDIS! HAYANDIS! HAYANDIS!

*runs at ludicrous speed*

===========

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sheba View Post
OC time, I am dead. But happy since Raoh gonna get his own series! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Spoiler for ID profile:

ZZZzzzzz tired. Brain is fried.
Ah, this is a nice summoner, and a close relationship with Caro to boot. The references to her summons are mostly myth-influenced ... but ARNGRIM? The crazy berserker with a huge cleaving sword from Valkyrie Profile? ... FINISHING STRIKE: FINAL BLAST!

*flees*

And luckily, Medusa's Gaze doesn't petrify, but I guess a mirror is still effective to turn the spell against Antigone and her comrades . Maybe she needs to bring a mirror herself .

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sheba View Post
New character.

Theme: ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR Pirates!

Spoiler for ID profile:
ARRRR, PIRATES!

"Environmentalist" pirates is very original in concept, and Morgan certainly lives up to it. Attacking TSAB, though, is going to be worrying for Morgan . If he's not careful, he might have the Arc aimed at his ship

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sheba View Post
Diana Dornier

Spoiler for ID profile:
Nice set of water-based abilities here, and she uses a whip to boot ! And using her well-endowed assets for public relations, even better !

Walk on Water is a nifty movement spell, she basically glides on water streams, eh?

Supportive of Hayate's sekuhara antics? NIC--

*feels an evil aura of dreadfulness at the back*

Aaron: KISAMA!



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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kagerou View Post
Spoiler for MSLN Alpha Episode 3, Scene 2:


^^; finally done with this damn scene.
Nice-to! Seeing the Wolkenritter, Hayate, and Aurion handling the Tempest is certainly a refreshing read to their more typical aerial combat. And Zafira even gets a non-shafted role in this .

I'm still wondering who the green-cloaked woman is ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kagerou View Post
Spoiler for MSLN Alpha Episode 3 Scene III:


:3
Yuunoko ! Why am I getting the feeling that by the end of the series, the two will hav-- No, erase that thought! But, Keroko having the hots for Yuuno and her awkwardness is delicious . And uhm, nearing the end, since the Spawn is kind of immune to magic, the mages won't be rendered to using conventionals, are they?

Pirate-y Erick is a nice touch for his personality! Not to mention the description of the previous hostility between the OFM and TSAB.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kagerou View Post
Spoiler for MSLN Alpha Episode 3, Scene IV:
I snicker at Kha's annoyance and protective nature, but never thought he'd be that protective of his waifu. Gravemind took the centerstage, though, with his tentacles-and-Spawn rampage. Guess Nanoha and company should start playing Starcraft and Halo to know their foes better .

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kagerou View Post
Will bust backlog later; for now, this:

Spoiler for Final Scene, MSLNAlpha Episode 03:


Will post on the fanfic thread when Goose finishes the rewrite he's been doing for like... two weeks.
Now, the mystery deepens to unknown depths. What are Carim and Genya plotting for the Cleric-Knights, and why do they sound so sinister while at it?

The drama is building up nicely, and Vice finding Nanoha in a deplorable condition is a fitting end.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kagerou View Post
Spoiler for MSLN Alpha, Episode 4, Scene 1:


This isn't the entire scene; the second half of scene 1 focuses on Hayate and Co.
This is one warm scene of reunion and gathering. Teana's current form is a bit startling (linked to Ariadne, perhaps?), but she's pulling through in her stride. Very nice!

*waits for the second scene to unfold*

P/S: By the way, it's ECG for electrocardiogram.

===========

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tormenk View Post
It's been awhile. Almost feels strange to be posting profiles here again.

Starting off with the expanded Jack profiles is Jac.

Spoiler for Jack of Spades:
Huge BLUECHEESIUM of delicious profiles .

Jac certainly fits his Akabane Kurodo personality, though he's less scarier. And wonder, wonder, the leader cooks instead of the underlings. Nice touch!

The spells are good and complements his fighting style (luckily there's no energy daggers and Bloody Rain ), but I don't really understand what Warding Swarm does. By "magical construct", does it mean things like barriers and the like, or things like devices, summoned creatures, etc.?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tormenk View Post
Spoiler for Jack of Hearts:


Last profile. Revised and toned down to better fit what I think is a more accurate profile.

P.S:
I'm using the image as a visual reference only. It is in no way a port of the person howsoever.
Jac at first sounds like a bloodthirsty berserker, but on further read, he's quite the composed rogue . And one-sided love is a torment indeed.

I don't particularly see the use of drugs in his combat style, actually. Ravage seems quite capable to bring out the best in him. The wind magic is certainly put to good use by Jac. And picture association with Grimmjow fits very well.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tormenk View Post
Spoiler for The Black Fist:


Well that took quite long.
...

Gen Ealin is certainly one of the best written profiles (other than Katrina) ever. And it speaks of the darker side of the TSAB that's being exploited widely by us in the OC thread in a new light. The conflicts of attitude he suffered is a very good touch, especially since his involvement with the incident of the Book of Darkness and his finding out about the cover-up. The TSAB will have a tough time dealing with a rogue who knows of how they operate. Gen liking silence and nature is something I did not expect (I thought he'll be liking cold murder of TSAB members more ).

Avatar certainly is an interesting Device with the capability to store Mana like spell cards. And the spell list is certainly nice to boot. Nothing in the region of HAXX, as far as I can tell. Overall, an extremely good character. TSAB should look out for their rears being kicked, now.

By the way, he's not the leader of the Prize, right ...?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tormenk View Post
Next two of the expanded Jack profiles, featuring Jas and Jec.

Spoiler for Jack of Clubs:
Good grief, the gals are more notorious than the guys . Jas is notably the one they'd be calling "tsun", no doubt . The sisterhood with Jec is very nice. Relationship with Jag is foreseen to improve significantly, I say, even if they don't like each other much now . Just hope that he's not at the receiving end of her bombardment spells in SLC mode .

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tormenk View Post
Spoiler for Jack of Diamonds:


I'll leave the Jacks short and revised write up about the Prize for next time. The effort of revising Katrina's profile still looms though.
Mm, nice youngest sister . Pity the man who invoked the other Jacks' wrath . The spells are worked well, good job! Giant Round Shield made me go though. The range is huge, and it's very durable. But, seeing as she needed to use quite a number of her discs, it's all right.

I wonder what will happen if she found out that her family were killed by the Prize during their talent searching ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tormenk View Post
ReBuild of Katrina? Nah..


~~~~~~




Spoiler for Katrina:


Backstory explaining Katrina's link to Jail, as well as Quint and the Alphinos.

Spoiler:


---

A placeholder for the revised version of the original profile. I got tired of referring to three separate posts for one profile and decided to make changes to the old one while I was at it.

A list of the changes.
  • - comestic changes to history
  • - reorganization of each section.
  • - rank fixed at S+
  • - Edited spells and added in some new ones.
  • - junking of conflicting spells such as AMF
Nice recap and cosmetic changes on Katrina's already rich history ! As your main antagonist, she remains as able and as terrible as ever, and her enemies would find her a difficult foe to handle, no doubt. Katrina dances to the symphony of fire and ice as well.

Her partnership with Jail and involvement with Alpino and Quint is meshed appropriately. Her parting smile for Lutecia does warm the heart, somewhat, despite the cool and deadly exterior she often exudes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tormenk View Post
Omigawd. You caught me with pants down after Aaron's bomb.

Can't help but say this is certainly one great read of an info dump. Not a dull moment in between the explanations and the character interactions inserted was great as well. =3
The backlog bluecheesium is a must after so long. I'm also enjoying a lot of stories and profiles that I've missed during my absence .

Thanks!

==========

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki View Post
[IMG]-snip-[/IMG]

Name: Evangeline "Tsurugi" Kamishiro
TSAB Rank: 1st Lieutenant
Gender: Female
Age: 22
Birthday: June 25 MC 053
Place of Birth: Administered Planet 58
Height: 172 cm
Weight: 52 kg
Eye Color: Lavender (floral)
Hair Color: Lavender (floral)
Mage Rank: A-
Magic Type: Neo-Belka
Magic Color: Purple
Magic Specialization: Physical
Combat Specialization: Close- and Mid-range Combat

Device Name: SaSword
Device Type: Armed
Device Primary Structure: Ninjato
Device Storage Form: Amethyst scorpion pendant
Device Appearance

Spoiler for For Length:
... One word to say it all: HAWT!

Her history is sad, especially about the lost of her family. Her life is a roller-coaster ride, it seems, what with her being on the wrong side of law, and then integrated into the Bureau (why do I have a feeling that Project ZECT is a pet project of Jail Scaglietti? Fortunately it isn't ). Luckily, her newfound friendship with Melissa provides her with a new perspective .

The Rider reference is ... .

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki View Post
Evangeline "Tsurugi" Kamishiro
Spells and Abilities

Spoiler for Spells & Abilities:
There isn't anything wrong with the spells. I find them short and sweet.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki View Post
Time for a little backstory on the Riders...

Spoiler for Masked Rider System:
Goodie! Ryotaro finally finds himself a rival in the form of Evangeline. I bet he'll find her more than a match for him . Nice touch on the project's background, didn't find much wrong there.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki View Post
*peers out of the Sea of Dirac*

>_>

Spoiler for Arrival:


*dives back into the Sea of Dirac*
I am cheering for Evangeline from this part of the world. Good going, girl! Serves the grunts right for messing with the Rider and their lieutenant . I wonder if they'll get more beating when they meet her in the main office later ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki View Post
GuardianS returns!!
Epic chapters as usual, PF . And a very interesting cliffhanger, too.
Thanks.

I think I should stop placing cliffhangers already, FieryAeon is mad at me.

Then again, I can't reveal everything now. Everything will come in time. Patience, patience.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki View Post
Ah, finally got around to starting this...

Spoiler for Darkness Within, pt 1:
First mission to Non-administrated World #195 is tinged with both tension and mystery.

Seeing the references to Jail and the Grimoire (oh damn, the Lost Logia there isn't this one, right? Katrina will be there ...) and the Prize, I take it this is a collaborative writing between you and Tormenk? I wish the two of you the very best of luck for some awesome epicness .

And I guess Katrina isn't forgiving to being referred with affectionate names .

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki View Post








Wha...wha...WHAT IS THIS?!?!?!

Holy freakin' Lilith that's some EPIC Bluecheesium

I am soo jealous if your battle writing skillz . Very well done, indeed. [Teal'c]Indeed.[/Teal'c] Though I don't remember that part where the 5th one died...
Thanks!

My battle scripts are average, I think. It drains a lot of brain power to write them, and so production was stalled for a long time >_<. Guess a lot of us aren't set to write intense battle drama. Your short on Evangeline fits just nicely, so no need to be jealous.

And the fifth one being dead was actually mentioned indirectly several times in the course of the story, just that it isn't as specific. Let's see if anyone can spot it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki View Post

Arthas, the Lich King...has fallen.

The terror that resided in Northrend has been defeated...or so they thought.

As the old saying goes: "Behind every great man is a great woman."

A new threat has arisen.


World of Warcraft
Wrath of the Lich Queen


Prepare to be...befriended



*RUNS AT LUDICROUS SPEED*


PF: Eto ... nice to meet you, Lich Queen ...

Lich Queen: *rattling breath* Nice to meet you, too ... You'll be my partner ... *Lich Queen rushes to embrace PF*

At the end of the day, the hollow winds of the blizzard whispered tales of the magnificent bird trapped in a crystalline prison of ice, never to be seen in the world again.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki View Post
So if that's the green Tiberium...what's the rarer, unstable Tiberium?
Bluecheesium?

*runs at ludicrous speed*

===========

Quote:
Originally Posted by Satty View Post
Hey there guys, what's up?

Looks like I'm going back to the craziness that is the OC thread. Anyway, didn't want to come empty-handed, so here's a little something....

Spoiler for SearcherS 12:


No color on dialogue, but I think I did okay....

Anyway, I have to go now, do my homework, later.


Looks like this is getting darker every chapter. All the good guys seem to have fallen to their foes. And Satoshi ... found out about his true self .

Last edited by PhoenixFlare; 2008-05-21 at 06:09.
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