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Old 2011-05-30, 12:05   Link #301
Silver-Throne
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Exclusively Inside Your Mind.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wild Goose View Post
Enough shouting.

I won't comment on his ancestry, except to say that who knows, his ancestor might have shaken hands with Jon's grandfather.




Alright, WTF, over. Firstly, you've made a half-crazed blood knight thrill of battle seeking sniper. No sane organisation is going to want a sniper who enjoys his work too much. Organisations employing snipers look for quiet professionals who do what has to be done, not loud blood knight thrillseeking killers. Even the great Simo Hayha and Carlos Hathcock knew when to put the rifles down and walk away.

Also, why the hell is he shouting all the time? You'd think that as Peterenko's grandson he'd be a bit like his grandfather - a quiet professional.

Also, fire for effect is the proper term, and it's used by artillery and mortar crews, not snipers.

Incidentally, have you forgotten Butei Law Section Nine? Butei are NOT allowed to kill. Your OC who's very kill-happy is going to have a hard time of it.

Now, on the other hand, if he's an antagonist, then that's something else. Certain things are more forgivable in antagonists.

Also, would it kill you to write normally? Putting everything in caps and bolded italics just turns people off.
fine then.
I changed the term. He`s not an antagonist. He`s a good guy
You may check the OC profile from the previous page

Last edited by Silver-Throne; 2011-05-30 at 12:27. Reason: added somethin`
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