Chapter 2
May 3, 2010
“Setsuna.”
Setsuna glanced up and caught the envelope that Mana tossed at her one-handed. Immediately, from the weight she could tell what it was. “Thank you,” she answered automatically.
Mana grunted and crossed her arms, eyeing the other girl sharply. “The other half is in your bank account already, as usual,” she said dryly.
Konoemon had figured out a couple of weeks ago that when he sent Setsuna her monthly paycheck she would simply hand the whole thing to Mana without touching any of it herself. And when he sent her the portion of her pay agreed upon for Mana
separately from the small amount he insisted on reserving for her, Setsuna would pass both envelopes over to Mana without looking at either of them anyway. Finally, he had settled with sending Mana
both the paychecks every month to ensure that they ended up where they belonged.
The money never mattered to Setsuna. It was only sensible for her to hire another guard for Konoka with it, since all she needed was food and a place to sleep, both of which were provided for her. The arrangement worked out well for everyone, since Konoemon couldn’t hire a second guard for Konoka without causing tension between the Konoe and the Wallward, and Setsuna could put the monthly paycheck she never touched to good use in Mana. She trusted Mana with Konoka’s life.
Although Setsuna was technically Mana’s superior, the tan woman seemed surprisingly determined to prevent Setsuna from forgetting that they were friends. Mana had even managed to get Setsuna to spend her dutiful pocket money on something frivolous last weekend, a decorated fan that was the only adornment in their shared, Spartan quarters. Then again, Setsuna suspected that the thrifty Mana had wanted the fan herself, but knew that Setsuna would put it up on display for both of them. Setsuna wasn’t sure, but the thought had made her chuckle anyway.
“I see.” Setsuna slid the envelope of cash into her jacket pocket then returned to her sit-ups, feeling all her muscles warming up after a night’s stiff sleep. These days, Setsuna found that it was easier to stand outside of Konoka and Kyo’s bedroom door and doze against the doorframe than sleep in a bed. If Mana hadn’t insulted her into going back to their quarters to sleep, Setsuna would probably have spent the night in the hallway anyways even though it was Mana’s watch shift.
At least when she was outside their door, her hearing kept the rest of her brain from imagining. Imagining in her too-soft bed was a thousand times worse than standing silently in a cold hall without betraying any emotion.
Setsuna pulled herself up again, her stomach muscles quivering lightly with the effort. She let the throb of physical exertion push her troubling thoughts back into obscurity again. An extra 50 reps today, just to wipe the last of that heartbreak away.
“They’re going out for lunch today,” Mana said as she restocked her gun magazines, checking each bullet carefully before she slid it in. “You’ll be the sole guard. I’m on stand-by duty this morning.”
Setsuna froze, then flipped to her feet. “Were you? I can’t remember the schedule—”
“I am.”
“…I can pay you overtime,” Setsuna offered desperately, reaching a hand to her jacket pocket. “If you’ll be close guard for the day…” She couldn’t spend today so close to Konoka. Not today.
“I’d rather have the day off,” Mana drawled, and Setsuna winced, knowing that the gunslinger
knew and was refusing to budge because she thought that it was for the better.
“Today’s not a good day for me,” growled Setsuna, frustrated and feeling her chest aching. Jerkily, she pulled her black suit jacket on and buttoned it up savagely.
“You have a job; the day shouldn’t matter to you.”
The words slipped out before Setsuna could stop herself. “
Fuck you, Mana.”
They glared at each other, the atmosphere tense even though neither of them were touching their weapons. Setsuna sighed first and rubbed her face, finger-combing her hair before picking up Yuunagi. “Sorry. Enjoy your day off.”
“You should eat some breakfast before you go,” Mana suggested with a raised eyebrow, her voice droll. “I think the lack of food has made you too unsettled to handle yourself professionally.”
“I’ll eat,” muttered Setsuna as she opened the door. She wasn’t a fool. But especially today, she had no appetite at all.
After dropping by the kitchen to secure a breakfast wrap and finishing it in two big bites, Setsuna walked through the large house towards the master bedroom. Luckily, it was still early in the morning, so much so that most of the servants were still in bed. Even on the best of days, Setsuna couldn’t stand overhearing their gossip.
“It seems the master and the lady had a good night last night, don’t you think? Young love!”
“If I was the master, I wouldn’t only take the lady once every couple of weeks, I’d go at it every night…” Laughter.
Once upon a time, Setsuna would have hit whoever dared to speak of Konoka that way. But this wasn’t long ago, and they weren’t teenagers anymore…and she didn’t have the sole right to Konoka anymore. Setsuna would just walk silently past the gossiping servants, trying to turn off her demonically keen hearing but failing every time.
Every time she heard them, a little more of her heart broke and turned to dust in the hollow inside her chest.
***
Konoka woke suddenly, disorientated. She thought for a moment that she was in a forest, lying on dying grass. Then she realized that she was in a bed, and wondered where Asuna was and why she hadn’t been woken up by an early alarm clock and Asuna’s ranting about Negi crawling into her bed again.
Then Konoka remembered where she was.
“Awake?”
“Yes,” she said, stretching lightly and pulling herself up to look at her husband. To her surprise he was fully dressed and standing by the bed with a breakfast tray in his hands. “Oh I’m sorry, did I sleep in?”
Kyo set the tray down over her lap and straightened up, brushing his wayward hair from his glasses to hide his awkwardness. “No, I just woke up early. It’s our one month anniversary, and when I asked Hazan she told me to—” He stopped and scratched his head sheepishly.
Konoka giggled, touched that he had asked his cousin for advice on what to do for her on their anniversary. “Thank you, Kyo, it’s really sweet.”
He grunted, and shuffled his feet. Too proper to pull at his neatly knotted tie, Kyo settled for blushing lightly and trying futilely to finger-comb his hair into behaving. “I heard that spell yesterday didn’t go as you wanted?”
“No, I think that the magnitude was too large for the target pieces I made for the testing,” Konoka said through a mouthful of pancakes. They tasted a little odd—the batter hadn’t been mixed properly. But that just went to show that Kyo had actually made it himself, which made Konoka smile at him despite her pique that he had to bring up the wards at every opportunity. “I’ll look it up tomorrow to make sure.”
“As soon as possible would be good,” Kyo nodded, walking over to their dresser and sighing as he picked up his Blackberry. He would get emails every five minutes, either from the Wallward Software company, from the mages he had researching the Koyane Wards or from his dragon of a grandmother, the Wallward family matriarch. Konoka swallowed instead of sighing as well at the thought of their lunch at the restaurant being interrupted by the constant beeping of his phone. “My research team has been really good about staying inconspicuous at the site, so it seems like so far no one unsavoury is the wiser. But sooner or later, someone’s going to notice, and the physical flaw will be easy to exploit.”
“I’ll take care of it tomorrow,” Konoka repeated, cutting into her scrambled eggs with exaggerated patience.
“Something that—” A knock at the door distracted him. The door opened and Setsuna stepped in, bowing sharply.
“Sir, there is a parcel downstairs for you.”
“Ah, that would be the rune text I borrowed from Takamichi-sama,” Kyo said happily, striding for the door before catching himself up and coming back over to the bed to give Konoka a kiss. Reminding herself to relax, Konoka still couldn’t help sneaking a glance at the doorway while they kissed. It wasn’t fair of her to tense up every time she was in the same room with both Kyo and Setsuna, but Konoka couldn’t help making that reflexive wince.
But Setsuna wasn’t there anymore.
“I’ll see you at lunch?” When she smiled and nodded at him, Kyo kissed her hand and left, shutting the door behind himself.
Konoka shoved another forkful of pancakes and eggs into her mouth. “Great,” she muttered to herself, feeling both good and bad, but overall mildly let down. “I wonder if Asuna is up yet?”
She needed to relieve some stress, and Konoka didn’t think that the rest of the household would appreciate her playing Super Mario complete with loud, pounding music and sound effects at this early hour. And Konoka desperately needed someone to tell her that they loved her, as a friend or anything else, and for her to be able to look them in the eyes and truly believe their words.
***
Setsuna slammed her forehead into the wall.
And she did it again.
And again.
God, what’s wrong with you? What happened to all your resolve and promises? Setsuna growled and drove her head into the wall again. This time she heard an ominous crack in the wood.
You can’t mess things up for Konoka now! Remember why you did in the first place!
When she had been guarding Konoka earlier that morning, her charge had somehow convinced Setsuna that she should stand guard inside Asuna’s room. Setsuna hadn’t thought much of it then, simply leaning Yuunagi against the wall and repositioning her katana, the better weapon for a smaller enclosed space. She had passively watched Asuna and Konoka engage in a match, both of them uncharacteristically broodingly silent as they played, the only sounds in the room coming from the tv speakers.
Seeing Konoka without a pretence of a smile on her face was just painful.
Seeing Konoka…not faking, exactly, but only passively content with little things instead of shining with general joy, was nearly unbearably agonizing for Setsuna. Because then the demon-girl would start thinking of
what ifs and
what could have beens, both useless practices that distracted her from her duty to protect her ojou-sama.
Sometime during their gaming, Asuna had cited a need to go take a shower. And somehow during the process when Asuna was exiting her room, Setsuna had found herself holding a game controller and caving in to Konoka’s innocent entreaties to finish the game with her.
Why did you give in? Doing such familiar things with Kono-chan, you’re only making things worse for both of you! Setsuna started to bring her forehead into the wall again but stopped herself when she saw the indentation and cracks in the planks. She scowled and turned around, crossing her arms again and tried to affect the stoic bodyguard routine.
Konoka’s married.
You’re just a servant now…it’s too soon for friendship, you know it, so soon after…
BAM!
“Um, Setsuna-san?”
Setsuna’s eyes snapped open and she glanced sideways in embarrassment from where her head had smashed into the wooden wall. Konoka had jerked open her bedroom door and was blinking in confusion at the sight of Setsuna and the broken wall.
“I’m sorry, Ojou-sama!” Setsuna stuttered, off-guard and stumbling back, bowing and trying to ignore the hole in the wall. Then she straightened again and froze, staring.
Konoka felt a jolt in her stomach when she saw Setsuna’s red eyes widen and her pale guardian freeze and fall silent. Konoka wasn’t vain, but she knew that her red dress and adorned hair made her look good.
From the look on Setsuna’s face, Konoka felt herself blushing and growing warm—the open admiration and burning desire in Setsuna’s intent stare made Konoka’s skin prickle with excitement. At the same time, she felt something comforting and warm pour into her chest, sending her stomach into giddy twirls.
She does
still love me, Konoka thought to herself in miserable triumph.
Wanting you isn’t the same as loving you, a nastier part of her whispered back.
“That’s alright,” Konoka said, ignoring the scandalized look from the maid who had helped her with her dressing, and who was giving Setsuna a disapproving glower. Konoka hoped that the maid hadn’t noticed Setsuna’s momentary lapse—the last thing she needed was more animosity between her staff and her best friend. Pointedly overlooking the odd indentation in the wall, Konoka slid her hand onto Setsuna’s upper arm, feeling the other girl tense. “Will you escort me to the car? I’m pretty sure Kyo will just meet us directly there.”
Setsuna bowed once more, carefully keeping a proper distance between them. Her expression had gone impassive again. “It will be my pleasure, Ojou-sama.”