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Victory Gundam is more effective than most over-the-counter sleeping pills. Additionally, before lulling its victims into a deep sleep, it has been proven to induce anethesia-like effects, hence its growing use among dentists and surgeons the world over. Recently in France, there was a shock when a fourteen-year-old boy went into a light coma after watching a full, 25 minute episode of Victory Gundam. Medical response teams that arrived at the scene quickly determined that the cause was poor animation and a badly executed, slow plot. They said the coma was brought on by an overdose of Victory Gundam, as most victims pass out before they watch half an episode.
There have been repeated cases of people seeking therapy upon completing Victory Gundam, as in most cases there is risk of total cerebral shutdown if more than one episode is viewed within the span of one month. Upon completing the series, there is massive loss of brain cells and, in rare cases, cancer of the brain, ears, and eyes. Victory Gundam has shown to increase the liklihood of autism, tourette's syndrome, and sickle cell disease if expectant mothers view the series. Doctors recommend you turn your monitor or television OFF when viewing Victory Gundam, as the intense ultraviolet light emitted from the crap animation can and will cause skin cancer. It is recommended that, should you decide to view Victory Gundam despite the numerous unhealthy side effects, you view it from a safe distance of no less than 30 meters, otherwise there is serious risk of permanent blindness.
If you decide to view Victory Gundam, please meet with the local funeral home director in advance so they can prepare a casket and the proper memorial services that will shortly follow your viewing of Victory Gundam. Do not tell your friends that you are currently or soon plan to be viewing Victory Gundam. They will laugh at you and the stigma will stay with you until you leave town or die. In addition, you will most surely cockblock yourself until you leave town, die, or consult the services of a hooker.
You may be thinking that you have heard good reviews of Victory Gundam, so why does it negatively affect so many of its viewers? Well, the short answer is that anyone telling you that it's a good show is most definitely trying to trick you into hurting yourself. If you decide to view Victory Gundam, please view it with a loaded pistol in case you wish to end your life quickly rather than the slow and painful process caused by exposure to Victory Gundam.
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