Well, if it makes you feel any better, you're having like, the exact opposite problem I usually do. I can generally think of dialogue easily, but have problems writing the scenes to actually use it with... which is probably why most of what I've written is so dialogue-heavy.
Anyway, onto the stuff you wanted responses to...
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Originally Posted by Triple_R
1) How much longer, in general, would you like the story to be? With the Mami Lives and Homura/Sayaka Alliance chains, there's no hard and fast rules here at all. With the Canon Narrative, I want to stick to the anime fairly closely, but even here I could skip over quite a few scenes where Madoka is not on camera if that's what people would prefer.
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Well, I'd actually imagine some people might be feeling a bit cheated if the Mami Lives side ends up shorter, but it doesn't really bother me if the conclusions are nice.
Unless you're taking it all the way to WN, Alliance looks like it could end pretty soon, but I'm not sure what you're doing with it.
As for Canon, while it certainly makes sense, skipping over scenes without Madoka kinda removes a good portion of the middle part of the series, doesn't it? This is a pretty tough call.
All in all, I really don't know what to do here. Sorry about that.
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Originally Posted by Triple_R
2) What do you hope to see with each romance route? Basically, how elaborate would you like each romance to be? Time constraints will be a factor to some degree of course (Madoka/Mami can go very long, Madoka/Kyouko will have to be at least a bit brief), but I'm wondering how much time you'd like me to spend completely away from action/drama/suspense to simply focus on "yummy Romance" shall we say. 2 Chapters per girl per route sound about right, or would you prefer more or less?
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An average of 2 chapters should be fine, I'd imagine... though I'd suggest giving Mami an extra one if we're going by route, given the fact exactly one chain involves MadoMami(excluding the harem end), whereas Sayaka and Homura have multiple ways... not really sure about what to do with Kyoko, though.
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Originally Posted by Triple_R
3) I've been thinking of splitting all future Mami Lives Chapters into three sections instead of the current two. 1 for Mami Romance, 1 for Sayaka romance, and 1 for "No Romance Yet". The alternative to that would be to stick to the current format (Mami Romance/Mami Friendship) and have lots of split spoiler space sections for parts focusing on MadoSaya and parts focusing on Madoka-no romance. Do my readers have any preference here?
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That largely depends on how much space NRY takes up. I'd imagine there wouldn't be a whole lot of people wanting to read about Madoka moping about while her friends are off fighting... on the other hand, I can't shake the amusing thought of Kyubey trying to coerce Madoka into making stupid wishes during that time frame.
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Originally Posted by Triple_R
4) How do readers feel about the overall narrative complexity at this point? Too complex, too straightforward, or just right? I'm kind of worried its become too complex (or just too long) since I seem to have lost a few readers since this fanfic began.
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Hard to say... I'm intentionally making things more complicated than they really should be, and I'm not having problems... then again, I'm also insane.
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Originally Posted by Triple_R
Now, to address Coldlight and Kogetsu directly - Excellent feedback guys! Both of you have great replies that are very helpful. 
As per your replies, I've made the following changes:
1. The first post on this thread now includes an Index. Please check it out and tell me if you find this satisfactory or not.
2. Madoka shooting at Kyouko in one section has been changed to be a grazing blow, and also a shot where Madoka was careful to only use a bit of her power.
3. Jinnai now refers to himself as a "magus". I know that was a concern that both of you had (Kogetsu brought it up to me elsewhere). |
Um... I'm only connected to the last one. In fact, most of this last part seems to be directed entirely towards Coldlight, so I'm just gonna skip to the next time my name comes up.
Thanks for the compliment all the same. Glad to know I've been of some use here.
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Originally Posted by Triple_R
You should know, Coldlight, that Kogetsu liked Sayaka having a brief villainous laugh.  Since you're split on that, I'll probably stick with the laugh. I won't have anything else like it though unless Sayaka snaps somehow (such as going into Berserker mode). |
If I had to be completely honest with you, Coldlight's probably the expert here. I just really thought the line, laugh included, was a nice touch, given the overall mood of the scene.
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Originally Posted by Triple_R
Finally, Coldlight, I'm curious to know where you get the bit about Kyubey ruling out wishing people back to life. I honestly don't recall seeing that at all in the anime. Given your wizardry with Madoka Magica screenshots that's second to none, it might be nice if you can show us a specific screenshot pertaining to Kyubey making an Aladdin's Genie-like claim of "No wishing people back from the dead!".
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I'm also a little curious, as I don't quite remember that either. Besides, I don't think allowing the wish is all that much a problem, considering exactly how powerful Madoka really is. (You know, the only one here who actually
has made a wish to bring someone back to life?
)
As a side note... I'm going to be hearing Robin Williams talking for Kyubey from now on. Thanks.