[Mr.Kyon]

Originally Posted by TkMacintosh

So yeah...An idea I had previously and one that I'm kinda writing out at the moment....

Spoiler for Another idea, somewhat lemon...:

Spoiler:

Touma gets into trouble when he knocks out/injures the lead actor in a new porno, and the director wants Touma to make repirations for this, so he has Touma be the new lead actor in the movie.

Touma is, of course, totally freaking out that he's going to be doing this, so telling his closest friend, distance that is, Tsuchimikado about what he's going to do, Tsuchimikado is understandedly jealous and upset. So to get his revenge on Touma, Tsuchimikado calls up Kanzaki and tells her. Kanzaki just had happen to have her phone on speaker, so not only did Kanzaki hear, but also Ursula, Agnese, and Itsuwa (maybe others, but I'm not sure who else)

After the movie is all said and done, it somehow leaks ("I ain't sayin' nothin', but I heard a certain Kami-yan stared in a certain adult movie...something devil's illusion." Tsuchimikado said, his ever persistant grin plastered on his face.) So it somehow reaches Ruiko Saten, who gets a clip of the movie, who then shows it to Uiharu, Kuroko, and Misaka, who get red and embarassed after seeing it, but Misaka instantly tells who the main male guy is.

....that's all I got...Yeah...Not the best idea, but eh...Oh well.
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The director realizes that with his lead knocked out and that with his new lead, he's gonna need a new script for the movie, but has no ideas. He hires a private eye to follow Touma around and get some info on his life. So what the private eye reports is that Touma seems to have bad luck in spades, but seems to have plenty of admirers. So the director decides to use this in the new script.

Touma's adult movie name, so his identify isn't uncovered, is Kamiko Touka. Director's choice, even Touma felt the urge to facepalm at the name.

Tsukuyomi Komoe gets an Adult movie because A) she's an adult B ) she has urges as well. So she decides to invite Yomikawa and Tessou Tsuzuri(maybe?). Yomikawa also invites her roommate Yoshikawa Kikyou.

So when the movie begins to play, they don't realize right away it's Touma in the film, but realize that the movie seems oddly familiar for some reason, but Yomikawa says that alot of porn movies are redoes of each other after a while, and that they should just go with the flow. When they do get to the sex scenes, Komoe jumps to her feet and says/shrieks in surprise "KAMIJOU-CHAN!" upon realization who that is.

With all 4 girls watch in shock, Komoe attemps to call Touma in order to scold him for doing this, but when she hears moaning of the female lead saying that he's huge, Komoe turns back to watch and just drops the phone in shock staring at the screen.

Spoiler for Short scene that came to me about the story, somewhat NSFW(?):

Komoe was shaking as she punched in the number to Touma's phone. "Yo-you can't be doing this, Kamijou-ch-" Komoe said quietly, her face flushed red.

"Ohh, Oohh! More! Gimme more! Yes! Oooh! You're so big!" Kaede screamed in pleasure as she took it from behind, her back pressed against his chest. The camera focused on their lower area.

Komoe turned around at the sudden interuption, her eyes glued to the screen. "Ka-Kamijou-chan...." Komoe trailed off, the phone slipping from her hands and hitting the floor with a clatter.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! THIS IS TOO RICH!" Yomikawa, tears in her eyes, laughed hard. Long and hard. "Ko-Komoe's favorite student in-in-in a porno-jan! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

"Though...she is right. Kamijou-san IS a big boy...big for his age" Yoshikawa said as she sipped her drink, her eyes glued to the boy's....package. "Wouldn't mind giving him a physical if I had the chance..."

If I can't post this here, let me know and I'll take it down :P

The Crack King approve of this. Only thing missing is Accelerator seeing it (I'm guessing they're watching it at Yomi's place, and somehow Accel turns up unannounced). But DANG, Kamiko is the name I planned on giving to Kihara Junior!

Speaking of that... I really have been struggling on getting his persona right...

Here's a snippet from Promise Chapter 6. I've had about three-four iterations of his character since I first started writing and rewriting the chapter.

Spoiler for Kihara Junior:

Such a nice day to do nothing. The streets of Academy City are rustling with activity at the eve of the Ichihanaransai festival. Final preparations mostly. The Competition Domes where the schools would face off were getting disinfected, then re-disinfected, then re-re-disinfected and— Okay, you get the idea. The weather isn’t great. Real chilly, peppered with some little bits of snow, but not too bad; the flights that would land in District 23—carrying the parents of students—wouldn’t be affected.

Not than it matters to me. Mum’s all cosy in England despite the Wars, busy with whatever work comes her way. My pops apparently was completely disintegrated, wiped clean off the face of the Earth a month and a half ago. That’s what the jerky-lookin’ Hound Dogs told me. Really, they were shaking in their boots like they had seen some demon! Gotta wonder what they were thinkin’ then. Bah, not gunna act like I care. Just means I get my inheritance sooner…

Still, can’t have the decency to tell me what got him in the end? Karma? Hoist by his own Petard? Chekhov’s Gunman? Bloody Mary, throw me a bone here! Just a “His body was completely atomized into nothingness…” isn’t proper closure! Why am I always so in the mud, anyway? I was part of this city’s Dark Side until some unnamed git decided to stop it all, yet I was told less than the norm. Was it because I’m a Kihara Kamiko—son of Kihara fucking Amata? Because I’m a twelve year old? Or, maybe because I have nerdy glasses, a stereotyped freckles-covered face AND, I’m a computer hacker/mechanical genius? Look, you unsophisticated wankers, do you want me to ‘Compute’ the most painful death imaginable? Here’s a good idea: How about I stick my arm right up your bum, pull out your intestines and feed them to you?

Okay, I can crack ungodly encryptions and mess around with complex circuitry and stuff, not really valuable in the big picture… Yeah… Heh… Not a Railgun or Dark Matter… Christ, my life was worthless back then… Truly, a poor little Geek Boy stuck in a dead-end IT job. Just hanging in the back and being treated like a pissjar. Fair comparison, well, except my fellow workers did rather special jobs and— Okay, they killed people. What’s done is done. Gotta move on…

Well, anyways… Mum and I had our weekly Sunday chit-chat. Lovely as always. Said she would send some rich tea leaves and smothered me with kisses. Truly I am a Mama’s Boy, or a Lady’s Man. I don’t really know.

As I was sipping my afternoon tea that my caretaker Kathleen had prepared, I cringed when it recalled that Nayuta-chan said she wanted to drag me out tomorrow. That damn cousin of mine will break me one of those days…and my aunt as well. I mean seriously, HOW in the FROCKING HECK do you scar a man so much than he gets Post Traumatic Stress the moment he even HEARS about sugar? Brrr…. Seeing cousin Nayuta-chan and aunt Therestina go at it on a sugar high does that. It is the very definition of jarring. And don’t get me started when that stupid aunt forces me to go buy boxes of damn jellybean cylinders. Look lady, just because you’re under house arrest doesn’t mean I have to feel sorry for you and be your buttmonkey. Yes, I will concede, I do feel about 25 percent more sympathy than most Kiharas under most rigorous psychological tests (blame Mum’s genes), BUT, that doesn’t make me a barmpot to be commanded. Alright? Good, very good… We understand each other.

Sighing as I finished my Sunday afternoon monologue, I finished my homely yet refined tea. My caretaker, Kathleen—trained by the head maid of the British Royals no less—approached me with a package in hand.

“Ah? What’s this?” I asked with curiosity.

“It’s a package for you, Master. It just came at the door”

Craning my body upwards from my cold leather seat besides the fireplace, I took the package from her hands. Immediately, something bothered me. I doubt this is from Mum, usually her packings are quite luxurious, not plain brown cardboard.

Then I looked at the sender…

“…Kathleen, can I ask you something?”

“Of course Master,” she happily chirped.

I stiffened my face, my eyes going blank as I looked at her with much gloom. “…You wouldn’t happen to have ordered anything from ‘Cheap-aphrodisiacs-international-dot-com’ would you?”

The tense silence lasted for a minute. Her mature features, adorned with obsidian hair as dark as the void, grew nervous. She flushed a little and shook her head without saying a word.

I cracked her a little smile. “…You’re adorable when you’re embarrassed, you know that?” I snatched off the receipt from the box and flashed it to her. “This is for our neighbor, Yomikawa-san it seems. Got mixed up. I was just teasing.”

“M-Master!” She blushed further and hid her face. I patted he head apologetically. Like my Mum says, a good Master teases his Servants to remind himself how handsome he is.

Good/Bad? I tried to make him unique yet fitting to the ToAru quirkiness. And yes, most of the chapter would be written like that if I stick with his current incarnation.