[Triple_R]

Thanks a lot for the compliments, Kagayaki, Asuras, and Sol!

Originally Posted by Sol Falling

Phahaha. Madoka doesn't quite strike me as someone who'd be into SHAFT, but that second line even caused me to laugh out loud, so I guess it's all good. Great stuff.

I'll be careful with humor that almost breaks the 4th Wall, but some of it here or there can make the fanfic more fun I think.

I guess some people won't be leaving their answers here, but for the record my choices this time were 3A and 4B.

Heh. No more vanilla choices for you, eh?

It hasn't particularly been my intention thus far, but it somewhat looks like I'm going the Madoka x Mami route. Sorry Homura. No hard feelings, alright? :P

lol

That "Opportunity Choice 1" is pretty "wow".

Spoiler for Opportunity Choice 1:

A happy end, technically, but it'd sure be a troll for a yuri lover. I wasn't in a position to take it, but it'd sure be interesting to see the reaction of someone who legitimately got that ending. A minor punishment, maybe, for hurting the feelings of all the girls?

Spoiler for Opportunity Choice 1:

Well, it is intended a bit as a minor punishment for yuri lovers yeah. But it's also a big half-joking reference to another anime by the name of Guilty Crown. People who've watched that show will hopefully find this "Guilty Crown" end funny. I get the impression that you haven't watched Guilty Crown, which is perhaps good and helpful to me, as I was hoping that the GC end would still be clear and thorough enough even for people who haven't watched GC. Thankfully, that seems to be the case, so that's good.

Plus, it occurred to me that having a few 'wild ends' sprinkled throughout the VN-style fanfic could give it some added unpredictability and color. That was inspired a bit by your Chapter 1 feedback, actually.

A slight bit of con-crit again. My English teachers back in highschool and elementary school always said not to use exclamation marks in proper writing, but I've appreciated how you've included them so far as they lend a certain expressiveness to Madoka's feelings. The way we can see when Madoka's excited makes reading from her perspective rather cute.

I'm glad you like that.

However, I do think that when entire paragraphs end with an exclamation mark in all of their sentences, that might be going a bit overboard. Not a huge issue in particular, but on occasion it might be good to cut back.

Good point. I admittedly hammed up Mami's big scene (from Madoka's perspective) quite a bit. I'll be a bit more reserved in my use of exclamation marks for such big scenes in the future. It probably was a bit overboard, yeah.

In any case, once again, this is great stuff. I'm looking forward to the next chapter too.

Thanks a lot! I'll hopefully have Chapter 3 up within a few days.