2011-06-11, 10:11 | Link #31383 | |
GregOS Offline
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Philippines
Age: 36
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And before the miniboss squad defeat, a 2nd to the strongest Finishing Move/Limit Break to kill them deader than dead... Or pull a tonino and Kill 'em all... or not... then at the Final Round against Shabranigdo, a Blood pumping Rally song, the party's best and strongest finishers for there's no kill like overkill and a SINGLE Arc-en-ciel to the lord Mazoku's face...
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2011-06-11, 13:36 | Link #31384 |
Forever a Journey
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Close to the northpole
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I come in peace, bringing more VivioHayate.
I realize that this sooner or later needs a title. I don't have that title yet. What's new here? Vivio kicks off her much deserved shore leave with a big, heated whoomp and learns the hard way that timing is everything. =D Working Title: The Vivio-Hayate Files Previous parts: Prelude: Not Today Part 1: Team Takamachi Part 2 Spoiler for When I Get Home There had Better Be Kisses:
Feedback is love! Grit, humor and hotness! This be a heavy burden, but I shall try. I figured since deathcurse is covering all the adorable, pre-confessional lovey-lovey stuff, I might as well go for something else. Most importantly, I was snickering like hell when I wrote this.
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Last edited by Shigan; 2011-06-12 at 05:08. |
2011-06-11, 19:13 | Link #31385 | |
Test Drive
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2011-06-12, 06:54 | Link #31387 | |
Cute things, sharp teeth.
Join Date: Jul 2008
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Anyway, that was quite an amusing (and hot!) chapter Interesting to see how the dynamic usually is between Vi and Hayate - Vivio's enthusiasm is not surprising given that she is a bit of a hot shot frontline commander (and a Takamachi), but would have imagined Hayate to be just as game instead of putting on "modest antics" normally (if we're to carry on with the joke about her groping tendencies). You're not going to run foul of any rules against explicit material any time soon, but I think it's at a good level as it is. The hottest line there was probably Vi telling Hayate not to fight ;D
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2011-06-12, 08:06 | Link #31388 | |
Forever a Journey
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Close to the northpole
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I will dance along the fine line of hotness and hope for the best. I don't like writing that stuff anyway, so yeah, hopefully I'll be fine. |
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2011-06-12, 08:39 | Link #31389 | |
Test Drive
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2011-06-12, 09:13 | Link #31390 | |
Cute things, sharp teeth.
Join Date: Jul 2008
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Ahem. Well yes, in THAT particular instance I can well understand why Hayate was reluctant, but the line "the general tried predictably to pull away but the blonde was used to her modest antics" reads to me like Hayate normally tries to play hard to get (emphasis added).
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2011-06-12, 11:10 | Link #31391 | |||
Forever a Journey
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Close to the northpole
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Also, speaking on Hayate's behalf: Vivio's ambushes can be quite insistent, it is natural for a woman of Hayate's social stature to put on least some measure of resistance, for dignity if nothing else xD. But fear not, if you're after Yagami shenagians, the next part should make you more than happy =D.
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Last edited by Shigan; 2011-06-12 at 11:56. |
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2011-06-12, 12:17 | Link #31392 | |
Beta by Accident
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Maine
Age: 52
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(On the other hand, if my wife's reaction to me was to "predictably" try to pull away and engage in "modest antics," we'd never have gotten engaged. I can't think of anything which would constitute an IRL buzzkill that that idiotic hentai trope where the girl (or one of them, in yuri) starts squealing "No! Don't! It's embarrassing!" in the middle of consensual sex. ) |
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2011-06-12, 12:47 | Link #31394 | |
Forever a Journey
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Close to the northpole
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*scratches head* I wrote what I thought would make that scene fun. If you think it's completely implausible, well, there's not a whole lot I can do about it <=). Besides, as I said, Hayate knew they had an audience.
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2011-06-12, 13:43 | Link #31395 | |
Queen of Tragedy
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Place of rocks and trees, and trees and rocks...and water.
Age: 33
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The latter explanation is kind of how I hazily imagine Hayate in my story if she were actually involved with Vivio; not so much the "I'm uneasy touching someone so much younger than I am" but more of a "I don't really think about sex all the time, so while I like making out with Vivio the thought of doing more than snuggling is not something I normally think about, and so my very initial reaction is surprise and a reflexive jumping back". I only say this in regards to how I've written Hayate, as someone who has been quite happily celibate for most of her life, and has some intimacy issues as of the beginning of the stories. It would really depend on how long those two have been sleeping together, I think--if it's relatively new, then I could see why Hayate might have that reaction. But if it's been a long-term thing, then I could see where it might be a bad sign for their relationship if Hayate feels uneasy making out with Vivio regardless of her personal feelings about intimacy.
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2011-06-12, 13:53 | Link #31396 | |
Forever a Journey
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Close to the northpole
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I'm writing Hayate as the one who had to grow into the physical aspect of their relationship, since she needs to overcome ten years of treasuring Vivio as the child of her best friends. I sort of imagined her being a bit jumpy about it while Vivio always knew what she was after and went for it with trumpets blaring. So yeah, I'm gonna stick to those characterizations since the story is bloody well almost finished. I'm not rewriting any of this! xD |
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2011-06-12, 14:12 | Link #31398 | ||
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: On a dot.
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..If that doesn't say how much I'm looking forward to the whole thing, hmm, I don't know what will. I like your interpretation on Hayate. Hayate, to me, had always seemed to be the sort who would do things deliberately, and for a reason(s). Every and any action is accounted for, and the impact of the action is considered. By extension, this also means that I interpreted Hayate as the sort who likes having self-control and etc. ..Aaaaand I'm stopping here before I start rambling. Great stuff, Shigan. Cheers. Edit: Quote:
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authorshipping, befriending, fanfiction, interactive fanfiction, nanoha |
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