Most Ridiculous Naruto theories

[Luminion Lancer]

-Gai and Lee

Spoiler:

To help his students achieve their maximum "springtime of youth" and utilize it's potential, Gai-sensei attempted to massproduce his own *ahem urine as an energy drink. You may get it even in our world. It goes by the name of "Powerade"! Not to be left behind, Lee attempted to do the same. He has a similar product known as "Gatorade".

-The 2 already captured Jinchuurikis identities are

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you tell me...

[Snubben_Pierre]

I must say your theories are real funny katonmakai..

here's one from me, lets hope you enjoy it..

there is very many people wondering if it will be naruto x hinata or naruto x sakura but what if kishi desides to make it naruto x sasuke because i think naruto seems alittle gay time to times and with that outfit he seems even more gay and who knows about sasuke , he is such a confused boy so who knows.. and if they feel like getting a child they just need to ask sakura since she would probally do anything to get closer to sasuke..(if this would happen kishi would not be liked by me)

[Airaku]

I hurt my brain when I came up with this, or maybe it was the other way around…

-Akatsuki

Spoiler:

It turns out that the Akatsuki were initially formed as a punk rock band. Unfortunately, ever since Orochimaru left the band to become a solo pop artist, the rest of the members lost their passion for the music. They hung up their maracas and picked aspirations for world domination. But even today their early songs continue to captivate the hearts of millions (not really). Some of their greatest hits include:

- Circus Freaks Rule The World
- We’re Ninja-fied!
- Who Let The Bijuu Out?
- Smooth Criminals
- Fellowship Of The Rings

[Luminion Lancer]

-Nice one Airaku.

-Most perverted character revealed

Spoiler:

Many of us have come to terms that Jiraiya is the most perverted character in the Naruto series. Second to none...or so we think. Keep your eyes peeled for I have discovered the true "Most" perverted character in Naruto. Indeed it is none other than HINATA! Now I know what you're thinking "KatonMakai you're a complete and total misenthrope with an engorged stupidity capacity and should be squashed by a boulder". OK but before you write my eulogy let me explain. We all know that the Byakugan provides a sort of X-ray ability to the eyes and therefore can see past many things. Now notice that whenever Hinata talks to Naruto she is never looking directly in his face. Also she has to this point managed to stalk Naruto for years without the guy ever catching her in the act. Jiraiya does look at naked women but he usually ends up getting caught, Hinata however is a whole other story...

[ShadowClone]

Shino

Spoiler:

Shino wasn't really a part of the Aburame clan. He was a normal Konoha lad who accidentally swallowed a radioactive stinkbug. This insect laid her eggs inside Shino, and due to genetics/evolution, gave birth to all sorts of bugs that he now controls. The reason Shino also wears that shirt up to his mouth is because of the stinkbug, he has permanent halitosis and so has to cover it up whenever he goes out.

Ino
This is so obvious I don't know why no one has figured this out yet...

Spoiler:

Ino is a transvestite. Remember the discussion of the Ino-Shika-Chou parents before the Sand invasion. Ino's father was telling how hard it was to raise his child. By this he menat that he also had a son, but this one decided to have a sex change and be a girl. He/she uses bandages to wrap around his/her body to hide the fact that he/she has no breasts. The same could probably be said "down there". I mean, who else other than a screaming tranny would go after Sasuke like that?

Tenten

Spoiler:

As a child, Tenten was a big fan of the Mickey Mouse club. Her parents bought her those "Mickey Mouse" "mouse ear caps" as a present. While Tenten was wearing the said cap, a welding accident near the factory Tenten's father worked fused it to her head. In could not be removed without endangering Tenten's life and so the Konoha doctors decided to make the cap a permanent fixture on her head. This, Tenten's "Hair" is actually the "fused" Mickey Mouse ears cap!

[jiji7]

Orichimaru is infact .....and has been all along ...yep you guessed it ; Micheal Jackson.

[Luminion Lancer]

-Yet another Shintoshi special

Spoiler:

Did you know Sakura's mother died a long time ago? It's true. Every time you hear her voice in the series, it's just a tape recording and Sakura is just in deep denial.

The Icha Icha Paradise book is actually based the behind-the-scenes antics of Naruto and Sakura. As a matter of fact, Kakashi realized this after the Icha Icha Violence series. For you see, Icha Icha violence referenced a time where Sakura beat Naruto that Kakashi witnessed.

[Luminion Lancer]

-Naruto

Spoiler:

Did you know that to make extra money for Ramen and other assorted things Naruto had to sell himself off as a male prostitute? It's true, but there's a twist to this. See Naruto is not only a male prostitute but his own pimp as well. See the way it works is that Naruto makes a lot of Kage Bunshins and then sends them to "do" what they were ordered to do. When they're done they collect the money and give it to the real Naruto. Then he releases the jutsu and gains all of the experience the bunshins got. Lucky for Naruto that in the world of anime there's no STDs or any ugly women or else he'd be in so much trouble right now.

[IVIavrick]

Orochimaru

Spoiler:

Orochimaru is actually the 8 tales bijuu Yamata Orochi. Long ago when Orochimaru was still a jounin he first became hungry for power and so set out to turn himself into a jinchuuriki(sp?) However, the power of the 8 tales was too much for the young Sannin Orochimaru and was consumed by it entirely. Since then it has been the bijuu who was controlling Orochimaru's every move and allowed him to learn so many forbidden jutsus and possess the fabled Kusanagi. This is also why Orochimaru can extend his neck and shoot out the sword and snake heads without the use of hand signs. Another things this led too was the membership of Akatsuki as he already contained a bijuu within.

[off_duty_naruto]

what a weird thread with funky theorys.....

[demonkd]

so....what exactly is going on here

[Luminion Lancer]

Originally Posted by demonkd

so....what exactly is going on here

-Well the main point of this thread is to post the most ludicrus or utterly ridiculous theories regarding Naruto and the series in general. For example you can claim that Neji is a pervert because he touches people in awkward areas during the Byakugan. Or you can claim that he makes a great massage therapist because his fighting style means gentle palm...

[Rachy]

Well the main point of this thread is to post the most ludicrus or utterly ridiculous theories regarding Naruto and the series in general.

I got one, Naruto becoming stronger than Sasuke .

[adien_000]

omfg who ever post this i say plz plz i hope to god ur not really messed up in the head

[LightningZERO]

Great posts!!! Keep it up!!!

[tramadrama]

Akatsuki

Spoiler:

The Akatsuki are the good guys and we have been lead to believe otherwise until some defining moment (like an uberninja) shows up that puts all of Akatsuki's previous ventures into perspective.

[Ero-Senn1n]

Spoiler:

The akatsuki leader who is Yondaime is the father of Naruto, and the mother is the last unknown female member shown with a flower in her hair.

[Airaku]

I just feel so dirty now…

-Kishimoto

Spoiler:

Before Kishi releases a new chapter, he visits the forums to bounce his ideas of his fans. In fact, he has an account on AnimeSuki and drops of comments here and there under his alias. In additions to comments, he posts various rough sketches of scenes that he hopes to put in later chapters and will usually post a summary in the weekly manga discussion thread to clear up any minor misunderstandings. His avatar always features his favorite character, Naruto…

[Luminion Lancer]

Originally Posted by uchiha rave

I got one, Naruto becoming stronger than Sasuke .

-Ok, but how? Remember that this is supposed to be a joke-theory and not a joke-statement. Besides we all know that it will be like that in the end and since you seem to agree I guess it really will come true :P.

-Sasuke

Spoiler:

will eventually return to normal. At some point in the story Sasuke will appear on the Drawn Togheter series. There he will become friends with Vooldor and after a request he will receive a Clum Baby (note: for those who are not aware, Clum Babies are formed when Vooldor performs him "Masterb**** Dance") which will cure him of any impurities. The after all these years Sasuke will start acting like decent human being for once.

[Airaku]

I was going to put this in the “Tobi’s Identity” thread, but this one’s more appropriate.

-Tobi

Spoiler:

Zetsu was taking his evening stroll when he came across a battle site fresh with slaughtered bodies. Although it was not yet his dinner time, the delightful aroma of rotting corpses won over his appetite. After he finished his meal, he noticed the smell of someone's especially delicious blood coming from under a pile of rocks. He digs out a young boy from under the rocks and to his dismay discover that the boy was still alive. It would distasteful for Zetsu, a true connoisseur of cannibalism, to eat someone who is not dead. There’s a certain colorful taste to human flesh that can only be brought out by rigor mortis. Zetsu was about finish off the boy when he noticed the sharingan in right eye. Damn it all—Zetsu can’t eat the kid now, Uchihas don’t digest very well and he always ends up with horrible diarrhea afterward. So…he decides to keep him as a pet; with something to pour all of his excess love into, his life has finally become complete.


Yeah...that's probably how it happened