lol...totally true.
(or maybe if we take the Kotomine Shirou fic and use Kotomine's extraordinally good medical jutsu Healing magic...Then it could be possible)
A smoking tunnel was piercing through its skull, the remainder of which listing to one side as its slowly-dematerialising form bled into the aethyr surrounding it.
If one were to pull back one's viewpoint, one would find that its un-natural corpse lay in the midst of a scene of devastation. Burned-out wrecks of armoured vehicles, checkpoints and pillboxes were scattered around the grounds of the compound. To one side, one would find a once-proud manor house still standing, albeit in the process of being gutted by a blazing fire. A once-impressive stained glass mosaic, which had faced the courtyard from the flank of the manor, had been shattered into a thousand pieces lying on the ground below.
And if one were to pull even further back, to take in the ruins of the compound in one vista, one might see the one whose actions had brought this destruction to pass.
The silver entity, carefully nestling a human woman under its left arm, rode its halo of light as it circled above the grounds of the compound one last time, before lifting higher into the skies.
------------------------------
"Do you have anywhere safe to go?" the being asked, as it continued its ascent.
The woman shook her head. "No... not anymore."
There was a pause, as if the being was trying not to recall memories from its own past. "I have somewhere you are welcome to stay at. Somewhere safe. Shall I take you there?"
She noted the tone as fairly matter-of-fact - or, at least, as much as one could be when one is in such a circumstance. But then, maybe such a tone was necessary in order to make sense of things.
In any case, she found herself more than willing to accept the offer. "I hope I will not be a burden, azukaru."
Though the currant visage had little in the way of recognisable features - save for those two piercing orbs of light serving as its eyes - she could almost sense a smile in response, as it assured her; "Not at all."
Arcing its flight path to one side, its speed increased, and the woman's hair fluttered in the wind as she was carried along in the rush.
Beneath her passed the twisting coastline, the waves from the ocean lapping onto the shore in the reflected moonlight. Both the land and water were dotted with the occasional artificial source of light, be they from scattered homes, toiling boats, fires lit in the wilderness or the beacon from a lonely lighthouse.
Above her sat the full moon, which looked wider and closer than she had ever envisioned it to be... as if she could almost touch it. Beyond sat nestled an uncountable number of stars, a wider and clearer array than she had stopped to notice down on terra firma.
Beside her, she felt the secure hold of the azukaru's arm, as she looked over and saw its right arm hang to one side, its long-barrelled extension somehow retracted out of view.
Despite how alien so much of it... of him... seemed, there were still no end of signs she could pick up on, to say that there was still a very human quality to his appearance.
She could imagine how easy it would be for someone to recoil in fright at the countenance of this being. Even so, she found herself to feel more secure in its presence than she had been at any stage of her life.
"Do you have a name?" she wondered.
"Once," he replied. "A name I was given at birth... before I became what you see."
She looked up to his face, or at least its closest equivalent. "And now?"
He turned to look back at her. "Now? I find myself still trying to answer who, and indeed what, I currently am."
She smiled. "The 'what' is less important than the 'who', azukaru."
It was the first time he had heard such a turn of phrase since his old life had come to an end.
He found himself suddenly hoping it wouldn't be the last.
------------------------------
Soon, his pace slowed as a dark and heavy gathering of clouds emerged in the distance.
"A thunderstorm," he told her. "I may have to fly around, or try to go over, or even -"
"Take me through, azukaru," she insisted at once.
"Are you sure?" he asked, feeling uncertain. He had never done this before. "I don't know if..."
Her next phrase made her intent crystal clear. "I want to ride the lightning."
He nodded, and shifted his grip so as to hold her in both arms. In response, she held on reflexively, as he rushed beneath the churning clouds.
Streaks of light erupted from one end of the mass to the other, hundreds of forks and bursts of searing light echoed by a rolling cacophony of thunder. This tumultuous piercing of the darkness allowed the pair to witness the kind of sight that would impress upon any being how vast and primal the forces of nature could be.
Bolts burst from one patch of cloud to another, some arcing so close to the halo of light at their back that they could almost feel it.
She howled in exhilaration, any sense of inhibition or self-consciousness cast aside, her voice lost in the awe-inspiring flow of sound and fury, signifying everything.
Indeed, she was so lost in the moment that she failed to notice how the object protruding from her guardian's left elbow seemed to shimmer with an unusual dim light - or how the flashes of energy before her never seemed to quite get close enough to cause harm.
What she did notice was the eventual cloudburst, as enough space cleared for her to be carried into a clear moonlit sky.
------------------------------
Her view shifted from the bright full moon to the string of islands below - two larger than the rest, and each of those in a chain leading up to a peninsula alight with the evidence of human industry.
They raced high above Ilha de Coloane, then Ilha de Taipa, before making a circuit over the peninsula of Macau itself.
This place had been the first of its kind in China - a Portuguese colony present long before the likes of Hong Kong would emerge in later centuries. Perhaps it might even be the last to remain, one day.
After the circuit, the duo descended towards the Baia Praia de Grande, at which the woman expressed her first degree of anythign approaching concern. "What if they see us?"
"Don't worry," he reassured her. "They won't."
At this, he leveled off, and flew low over the waters, weaving its course almost instinctively towards landfall. Its halo dimmed, making it that much more difficult for anyone catching a glimpse of this sight to take it for anything other than the product of an over-worked imagination.
Away from the bustle of the city centre, the pair slowed as they came to a careful landing, on a balcony facing towards an enclosed garden at the back of a two-story house.
She tentatively stepped forward, securing her footing on the solid surface. A sigh was released into the air, as if in remorse at the loss of such a sensation as that she had just experienced.
She stepped back, as her rescuer knelt forth, retracting some of its other-worldly form to reveal a more human visage.
He turned to her, his human face showing. "Ladies first," he offered, as the door leading from the balcony into the residence opened.
There were still so many questions to ask, and answer.
So many ways in which she had to come to terms with what she had lost.
Yet, here and now, Gedatsu Houri - alongside the man born by the name of Andrei Muraviev - could understand at least part of what she had presently gained.
Spoiler for Crystal Valley: Part 3:
Part 3
"Nice, aren't they?"
Seonac had noted Shirou perched against an unassuming corner of the São Paulo Marriott Hotel. The five had landed at the adjacent São Paulo-Guarulhos International Airport earlier that day, and were using the next day or two's worth of time to try and adjust for the time difference. They would have to do so again on a later part of their journey, but only by another hour's worth.
While Sakura, Saber and Rin were in their hotel rooms trying to catch some rest, Shirou had taken the opportunity to go up to the roof... and try to get his first look at a Southern Hemisphere sky.
Seonac had followed suit, and was currently referring to two of the most notable objects one could see, the light pollution from the hemisphere's largest metropolitan area notwithstanding - the Magellanic Clouds.
"They are," Shirou nodded. He wondered what they might look like through a telescope, though. There was only so much a Reinforced eyeball could help when dealing with astronomical phemomena, after all.
Seonac sat himself across from Shirou, facing the red-headed mage, who seemed to be lost in thought. "Am I interrupting something?"
Shirou shook his head. "No, I was just... trying to get as clear a sense of this moment as I could."
The meaning was not hard to pick up on. "For Ilya."
When caught up in the ebb and flow of the Fifth Heaven's Feel, Shirou and Rin had not been able to learn more about the young von Einzbern than what they saw in a few relatively brief events. The girl had been a rival Master, albeit one who seemed to have a particular interest in who she referred to as 'onii-chan' - but Shirou had no particular reason to stop and ask why this might be. There were enough things for him to try and get a handle on as it was.
After what was to become her last stand, as well as that of her Servant, Berserker - who had desperately, but vainly, tried to block his charge from harm at the hands of Gilgamesh - he had seemingly been left at a loss as to her true importance.
So it remained until not so long ago, when Saber finally came forth, and told him about her true heritage.
"Saber said that even if she had survived the war," Shirou reminisced, "that she was doomed - that she would almost certainly only have a year or so to live afterwards."
"If that was so," Seonac sighed, "then I wouldn't have had a chance to meet her -"
"- and she would have missed out on being here with us, I know." Shirou wasn't one for holding in to regrets, but the missed opportunity to at least try to find a solution for his sister, or at least to make the most of the time she might have had if one was not to hand, stung more than he was quite ready to account for.
"But either way, I'd like to think that I'm able to carry a piece of her legacy with me, somehow."
Seonac nodded, understanding that sentiment well enough. "You know, one thing I saw during a certain event last year, in the recesses of a mind not worthy to hold such, was a glimpse, or echo... and it's something I've kept with me."
Shirou looked over at Seonac, and tried to wonder what it was he was referring to - but unsure of how to ask. There was another though, however, which sprang to mind. "What's it like, Seonac?"
"What is what like?" came the reply.
"Family," Shirou went on. "I mean, not a guardian like Fuji-nee, or a foster father like Kiritsugu, or a lost stepsister like Ilya. To have an actual flesh and blood relation to your mother and father, and to all of those in your wider family."
While it had been suggested that Shirou try some kind of DNA testing in order to find out about his biological parents, or indeed if there were any distant living relatives of his (or of Kiritsugu's for that matter) he hadn't shifted his focus from the people who were in his life as it stood. Whether it was out of dedication to his current 'family', or out of hesitancy to re-open that aspect of his life, was a matter for debate.
"You can see that for yourself, Shirou," Seonac tried to encourage him. "When you are in my parent's home, you're as welcome around the table as anyone - even me." Not least when Niall, Sadhbh and the others cottoned on to how good a cook the red-headed lad could be.
"It's not the same," Shirou pointed out. "You might not see it, but no matter how much at home your parents make me feel when I'm staying over, you are still their kin. You are the one they hold that connection with."
Even now, after all this time, it was still hard for Seonac to imagine that he was the one who had something Shirou could be envious of. "You know, I don't feel it as much right now, but for a long time I'd felt that it's you who are the one with all of the connections, the bonds, the..."
Now Shirou was the one to try and make an educated guess. "Because of Tohsaka?"
Seonac stopped, and lowered his head a little as he tried to say something he probably shouldn't have left un-addressed for so long. "Not just her. I mean, Saber's always had that strong bond with you, that kind of connection that I often couldn't help but feel I had no place being in the vicinity of. And then there was..."
It wasn't something he felt anymore, but he could feel something of an echo of what he might have felt in an earlier time. Memories never did quite fade out of their emotional context entirely. "I mean, if you had done things differently, you could have been the one to settle down with Sakura."
"You think it's that..." Shirou tried to respond, but couldn't get his head around it.
"You say that I've got this bond at home," Seonac went on, "but I would have answered by saying that my family is stuck with me, through a quirk of biology. You have been able to land yourself at the centre of attention for people who chose to involve you in their lives, because of who you are, and what you have done."
"What are you talking about?" Shirou asked.
"Come on," came the reply. "How many people you know can call a Reality Marble their own, and list the title of winner of a Holy Grail War to their credit? I'm surprised more people aren't trying to get you a matching cape and mask."
"Look, it's not that..."
"I would have asked myself, for the longest time, what right have I to even try..." he was getting a little too close to those old feelings for comfort, "when I would always be compared to you, and found wanting?"
There was an awkward silence, which the not-so-distant sound of aircraft traffic seemed to do little to dispel. The two had almost lost the point they were trying to make, if indeed there was any point to all of this in the first place.
"Those people back in the Clock Tower," Shirou said, trying to get his thoughts on track, "they don't see me as a hero. They don't want someone to cheer on, or hang out with, or form any kind of proper relationship towards."
He tried not to let the anger he felt at what they really wanted bubble forth. "They are only interested in figuring out what makes me tick - in getting the chance have me lying on a dissection table, so they can root around and try to find anything worth sticking in a petrie dish and writing up in a lab report."
The thought of his body being used as some kind of garish display piece at the Association headquarters made his stomach churn.
"And of those who might not be ready to carve me up, how many of them are only trying it on just to try and get at Tohsaka?" He thought of the heated rivalry between Rin and Luvia Edelfelt, and was annoyed at the though that her calling him 'Shero' and trying to act in any way nice to him was likely a ploy to get at the woman he had made a commitment to.
But then, that commitment had trouble enough on its own. "And I don't need to tell you that I've had trouble with Tohsaka, and with Saber, too." There was a time after Saber's disclosure concerning Ilya that Shirou took, before he felt that he could face the rest of what she had to say. In that time, Seonac had felt caught in the middle, as he tried to help Saber on the one hand, and to help bring Shirou around on the other. It hadn't been easy, but it had led to a stronger set of relationships once they were able to confront it together.
Something of a lesson, perhaps.
"And as for Sakura..." Shirou sighed. "Maybe you're right, and maybe I could have noticed things earlier - both in terms of how she felt, and in what she was going through."
That, too, was something he was not entirely comfortable trying to account for. "But even then, there's no way I can say that things would have worked out any better than they are right now, for her and you."
"Well, I did say that this is what I would have said," Seonac told him, "but I guess it doesn't come across all that differently by me saying it now."
"Then what would you say now?" Shirou pressed.
At that, Seonac's expression softened. He smiled as he felt a wave of understanding return - the kind of wave that he found himself more able to call forth these days. "That letting myself live in the shadow of an impossible ideal won't get me anywhere."
Shirou noted those words closely. "Impossible ideals can do that."
"I can't be you," Seonac said. "No matter what I try, I can't go back and live the life you did. I can't be in the places you have been, fight the battles you have fought, and build the connections that you have built in your time."
While that thought might have had a heavy effect once, it didn't at this moment. "But that's okay. As you say, it's not like you can live the kind of life I've lived up to now, even if I'm not overly sure you'd really want to."
"All I can do is be myself, to learn my own options, to make peace with my own failings, and be the best Seonac Ó'Conaill that I can be."
Shirou smiled at that. "You know, I'm really glad to hear that. You're my friend, Seonac - you have as much a place in our group of friends as anyone. And more, I'm proud of what you did to help Sakura. You helped her in a way that I couldn't do, took a risk that could have left you losing everything, and came out on the other side with a legacy that, well, is the reason we're sitting here on top of a hotel in Brazil!"
"And I might add," Shirou pointed out, "you're no less important to Saber and Tohsaka as well. Although, I'd hope I don't need to tell you how Sakura ranks you in the grand scheme of things!"
"That one I think I got all by myself." With that, Seonac stood up and walked over to where Shirou was propped up.
"Look, before we go on," he offered, closing his eyes, "if you want to have a swing at me over what I did back then, I'll understand."
Shirou stood up, and offered something else instead - his hand. "To be honest, I was due that one anyway. And besides, I doubt I'd do worse than what Tohsaka landed you with!"
The two of them laughed at that one, as they shook hands, re-affirming what they had been building from the start, despite getting a little side-tracked here and there.
A friendship of equals.
"We should have had this kind of conversation a long time ago," Seonac said.
"I know." Shirou wondered whether their friendship would be only really starting now. "But better late than never!"
A rumbling emerged from Seonac's stomach, evidence that it was ready to get over the inconvenience of having to avoid the less-than-ideal airline food on the flight in. "God, I'm starving."
"Me too," Shirou agreed. He couldn't stand airline food either. "Come on, let's go eat!"
Seonac remembered one of the other reasons he was up here. "Oh, I still have to write something."
"Write it at the restaurant," Shirou said. "There should be enough room at the table for a pen and paper run-through."
Seonac thought of what the intended recipient might think of the letter being penned in the middle of a meal, and figured it couldn't hurt to find out.
"Will do," he affirmed, as the two headed down to eat.
"That friend of yours still writing to you in Italian?" Shirou asked. He hadn't met Seonac's pen pal in person, but had heard a thing or two.
"Yeah," Seonac answered. "I'm still trying to work out what language to send my latest reply in."
Shirou had an idea. "Why write in just the one?"
Seonac let a grin loose in response. "Now there's an idea..."
Spoiler for Crystal Valley: Part 4:
Part 4
*KA-CHOOM...*
The sudden burst of thunder shook Houri from her rest, and she stirred with a jolt.
After taking a moment or two to re-orient herself, she looked around and saw herself in a room she hadn't remembered visiting, lying on a rather comfortable mattress. The other side of the bed lay undisturbed, though as she took the room in, she found a note placed on the small table near her side of the bed.
She picked it up, and found herself smiling a little as she read it:
Dear Houri,
I hope it's not an inconvenience, but as my guest, it seemed ungentlemanly to leave you lying on my couch.
By the time you read this, I may be either asleep on the couch myself, or up and about doing... I dunno. Something or other.
In any case, take as much time as you like.
Thank you... for trusting me.
Andrei.
She remembered it now. After he had let her in, they had just about spent enough time to give each other's names before he went to try and get her some tea. By the time he came back, she must have fallen asleep - the events of the day finally catching up with her. She wouldn't have minded being left where she was, but was grateful for the act of chivalry.
She yawned a little as she stretched her arms and legs. She got up, and noted there was a few sets of spare clothes and other items resting on an armchair.
On them was another note:
I had a few pieces delivered over. I didn't know what size to go for, so I asked them to send some different options. If you like, the ones that aren't suitable can be returned. Oh, and I asked them for some things to help you freshen up, since I don't make much use of ladies' toiletries.
Bear with me - I'm not quite used to this sort of thing!
She chuckled a little at that.
------------------------------
"Доброе утро - good morning," Andrei offered. He was stepping out of the kitchen on the ground floor as Houri made her way down the stairs. She had managed to freshen up, and was wearing one of the changes of clothes he had ordered. "Did you rest well?"
"Hai," she nodded. "Thank you for letting me use your room, and for going out of your way to make me feel welcome."
He waved his hand, dismissing the need for such comments. "It's not a problem at all. It would be nekulturny of me to treat a guest lightly..."
He stopped for a moment, as she stood before him. "...not least given the circumstances."
Even though there was still a lot to talk about, she could well appreciate that last sentiment.
But, before they went onto the more serious business of things, there was a more immediate matter to attend to. "So, where can I go to make myself some breakfast?"
"That," he smiled, "is already taken care of."
------------------------------
"Mama, look!" the young boy called out, gasping as he pointed his finger out of the train carriage window, and towards the awe-inspiring sight beyond.
The Circum-Baikal Railway was a marvel of engineering prowess, a ribbon of iron which had taken the efforts of thousands to build. Part of the greater Trans-Siberian network which ran here all the way from St. Petersburg in the far west of the Russian Empire, and as far east as the Pacific port city of Vladivostok.
Andrei and his parents had boarded the train at Irkutsk, a place where his Decembrist ancestors had left European Russia for generations earlier. Little Andrei had never been this far east before, and marvelled at the sight of the Blue Eye of Siberia. Lake Baikal was the oldest and deepest freshwater lake in the world, with more water than all five of the North American Great Lakes combined. It had been a focal point for life in this part of the world for a very long time, and its deeply rich colour and sheer size never failed to draw the eye of those who laid eyes upon it.
"Isn't it amazing, Mama?" Andrei asked his mother again, tugging onto her arm with his right hand.
She smiled over to him, looking out onto the lake herself. "Yes, my little Andryusha - it's very special."
At that, he turned and drew himself in, looking up at his mother's face. He didn't need to look at it to know how she was feeling - since birth, he had possessed the secret gift of mind-sight which always told him this. Yet, even so, as he tried to learn the rituals of self-control, he found himself having to get more used to understanding her thoughts and feelings through her words and expressions.
"Why do you look so sad, Mama?" he 'asked' her telepathically, remembering his training, careful not to broadcast the message to anyone else around him.
She traced the tip of her finger against his forehead, and tried to soothe his now-worried mind. "Don't worry - your Mama is going to be fine. I promise."
"Okay," he accepted, before turning back to look out at the shimmering waters the train gradually passed on its journey.
------------------------------
"So that was the first thing you remember," Houri asked. The two were seated in the living room, and had started to talk.
"Yes," he answered. "I can't remember much of Irkutsk itself, but I don't know whether it was something I have only recentl forgotten, or just never really thought of that much."
She listened to this, as she took a sip of her green tea. "Why did your family leave?"
"My family had heard news of the troubles further west, in Moscow and St. Petersbu..." he still defaulted to the city's original name, but grudgingly deferred to the new name it had been given just five years ago. "...Leningrad."
As a child, he had known little of the horrendous war that the Empire had been fighting against the Central Powers, or understood the repeated tides of unrest and revolution which had been catalysed in its wake. "We decided to move to Vladivostok, where they thought it was still safe - and from where it would be easier to leave the country if it came to that."
------------------------------
While it was no secret that the port city of Vladivostok, lying as it did at the furthest terminus of the world's largest railway, resting at the gateway to the Pacific Ocean, Few of its inhabitants could have foreseen the role that it found itself playing during the Russian Civil War.
The sight of Allied troops marching through its streets, Western soldiers posing for photographs with Russian schoolchildren while taking time away from garrison or expeditionary duty, or propagandalithographs in foreign languages extolling the cause of 'interventionism' against the Bolshevik forces seeking to transform the Russian Empire into the Soviet Union...
...it was a lot for a precocious young boy to take in.
Andrei passed through a crowd of mingling Allied soldiers, on his way down Svetlanskaya Street. His mother would have been furious to find him out by himself like this, but he couldn't resist what to him seemed like a once-in-a-lifetime adventure.
He liked to try and play a game, based on what he heard being spoken, and what he found while carefully peeking into the thought processes of the array of foreigners. He didn't quite understand their various languages, of course, but that was part of the fun - to try and piece together all of the things they were both saying, and wishing to say.
He felt like quite the little spy.
"So yeah," he heard one foreigner - Canadian, according to the uniform - talk to another... who looked like he was American, "you getting your bags packed yet?"
The other one smirked back over. "Yeah - they're finally going to let us get the hell out of here."
Andrei was suprised, when he realised that some of the man's thought processes were... Russian! He hadn't thought of finding a foreigner who thought Russian before, but his train of thought made it clearer. "After all the trouble I went through to get out of this blasted country, the amerikanskiy bastards put me in a uniform and send me back over! Chush' sobách'ya..."
If Mama didn't know already, Andrei realised he'd have to tell her. Withouut the somewhat intemperate language, of course.
Across the street, Andrei noticed a group of other foreign soldiers marching. They looked very different.
The Russian-American didn't look impressed. "They don't look like they'll be going anywhere. "
"Well, to be fair," the Canadian offered, "Their home's a lot closer to this place then ours are."
"Feh," the other retorted, as he started to turn away. "They're welcome to it."
While the Canadian might not have realised it, Andrei could tell that the other one was somewhat more conflicted about the whole situation than he was letting on.
He didn't like to think he'd feel the same someday.
------------------------------
"The Japanese stayed on for another few years," Andrei explained, "but we left just as the Western troops pulled out, in June 1920. Of course, at the time, it didn't quite dawn on me that I'd never see the place again..."
Houri nodded silently. As it happened, some of her extended family had a son posted in Russia during the intervention, and she knew that the city was now off-limits to foreign citizens. She felt that was a shame - it sounded like it was an interesting place. "So your family came to Macau?"
"Not quite," he replied. "My mother brought me to Hong Kong, while others we knew scattered to places as far as Canton and Macau, Shanghai and Taihoku. Most of them went over to North America or on to Europe, however."
"I wonder if my own family ever met one of them in Taihoku," she offered. Her own parents had moved to that city - which was still known to many as Taipei - from Hokkaido in her youth, before trying their fortune in Hong Kong in more recent years.
Alas, fortune can be fickle.
"Do you have any family you'd like to contact there?" Andrei asked.
She shook her head. "Not at the moment, azukaru."
He noted that even after learning his name, she still chose to use that term for him. In a way, he was glad for this, since that name almost had more meaning for him now than Andrei seemed to.
At least, so it seemed ever since his life was set on a new, irrevocable course.
"While I had the mind-gift from that time," he explained, "it would only be later on that I would become... the being you have seen."
She could tell that referring to whatever had happened was something he was struggling to come to terms with. Perhaps this was the first time he had even tried to. But she was in no rush. "Take your time, and tell me what you are ready to say, when you are ready to say it."
She moved over on the couch closer to him, and placed her hand on his forearm. Her touch was delicate, as if trying to pass through her own support and understanding through her fingertips. "You are there for me, azukaru... and I will be here for you."
He found himself blushing, as he looked into her eyes, truly realising her achingly beautiful features as if for the first time. Yet, he then turned his head aside, not ready to let himself see her in such a way, or even sure if he had any right to. "You should know that I... that even as you see me now, I am no longer fully... human."
She leaned her head over, her eyes still looking at his turned face. It looked human enough.
As she placed her hand against his cheek, she discovered that it felt human enough, too.
"You are still fully you, azukaru, and that is what matters."
He turned back to look into her eyes again, and found himself shedding a tear as he heard her words...
...and realised that for the first time, he could believe them.
Spoiler for Crystal Valley: Part 5:
(The formatting was meant to be different, but it didn't work. Oh well.)
Part 5
With a near-silent click from a card-based lock, the door to the already-dark hotel room was opened slowly. Seonac had taken a little time making up for lost meal time alongside Shirou downstairs, before both young men decided to try and get at least some rest before the group's ongoing journey later that day.
Seonac stepped into the room carefully, trying not to make any noise - or, at least, not enough to disturb his partner's sleep. After entering the room, he breathed slowly as he eased the door shut. Once done, he slid off his shoes and put them beside one of their bags.
Reaching into the bag, he plucked out the nightclothes sitting on top of the otherwise tightly-packed clothes and other items within. Scooping them under one arm, he put the folded piece of paper in his hand to one side before reaching into one of the side pockets for an envelope. It was somewhat awkward trying to fold the letter away with one-and-a-half arms' worth of limbs available, but it could still be done. He sealed the envelope and placed it onto the nearby counter top, though as he did so he wondered if he might have been better off waiting until they got back from Brazil before mailing it.
Well, Seonac, if the worst happens to you on this mad adventure, it won't send itself, he thought in reply. He didn't want to think about that eventuality, but no matter how confident he felt about what was to come, he could not ignore the risks involved.
He left the envelope on the counter.
That matter out of the way, he quickly stepped into the bathroom with his change of clothes in hand. He had been wearing the same outfit since boarding the connecting flight out of Dublin, and wanted to try and freshen up before getting changed. Once inside, he waited until the door was closed before putting the light on, hoping he hadn't disturbed Sakura's sleep already.
Several minutes later, he stepped out again, feeling more refreshed than he had in a while. Putting the other clothes away, he looked over to see how Sakura was doing. In this light, he couldn't tell too much, but could at least see her outline. Her back was turned to him, or rather to the empty half of the bed lying in wait.
Before he climbed in, he took a moment to take in the sight of her lying in rest, her body moving almost imperceptibly as she breathed in and out, her hair falling across the side of her pillow in the half-light.
I could watch you sleep all day, my love, he thought to himself, before the yawn he promptly found himself stifling told him otherwise. Duly taking the hint, he slid under his side of the cover and tried to settle in.
While he wanted to lie facing her, he reminded himself that neither of them were immune to the effects of air travel. So, he turned to the opposite side, and focused on trying to settle into the mattress.
His eyes had only just closed before he felt her gentle hand resting upon his back. "Welcome back, itoshii."
His smile was interrupted by another yawn, one he had more trouble trying to stifle. "I hope I didn't disturb you, Sakura," he tried to whisper through the yawn.
Mercifully, she got the message. "You should know by now..." she assured him, as she snuggled closer, wrapping her arms around him as she cosied herself against his back, her lips resting against the back of his head before moving to rest her forehead there instead. "I feel the very opposite when you are with me, my love."
"My pleasure," he answered her, clasping her hands in his. It really is.
"Did you get your letter finished?" she asked, correctly guessing one of the reasons he had been away from the room. While Seonac had talked about his correspondence with Caren before, Sakura had not met her, despite the two being in the same city for several months.
Seonac nodded slightly. "I did - and I was able to have a long-overdue chat with Shirou in the process, too."
He couldn't see her face, but he could still sense her smile, even without the insight which their close mental link provided. "I'm glad to hear that, itoshii."
"You know," Seonac realised, "we could invite Caren to the wedding, if you like. I'd probably try to ruffle up invites for Mike and David, and a few others, so the more the merrier."
Sakura squeezed his hand with her own at the idea. "That sounds good! I would like to meet her, as well as... your mentor?"
"Mike, yeah," he replied. "You'll like him. I don't know his brother David that much, but he seems like a good guy too."
"There's someone I like very much already," she whispered.
"Well," Seonac whispered back, "I'm pretty sure that someone likes you very much too... Sakura."
"Hee hee," she giggled, squeezing him closely as she lifted her head, turning it to press her cheek against him.
They lay comfortably like this for a while, both tired but not ready to sleep, neither rushing to do more but take in the warmth and comfort of the other's soft embrace.
However, after a while, her hand started to feel somewhat less steady, he breath a little less relaxed than Seonac would have liked.
Eventually, the silence broke, as Sakura said two words which felt like they had waited a long time to be said. "I'm sorry."
There was a sense of weight, of loss, of pain in those words - the kind Seonac had never wanted her to feel for any reason, least of all for his sake. He turned around to face her, stroking the side of her face with his fingertips. "What is it, Sakura?"
She could feel tears welling in her eyes, as she pushed on to the rest of what she wanted to say. "I... I wasn't good enough... I... I..."
The groundswell of emotion tipped over, flooding across the mind-link between the two. Seonac gasped as the meaning behind such difficult words broke through.
He sat up in the bed, cupping her face in his hands as she followed suit, looking as deeply into her rich blue eyes as he had ever done. "Nothing in the universe could convince me that you are 'not good enough' for anything. And nothing ever will."
"But I..." she wept openly now, looking back into his emerald eyes, somehow seeming as if she could see more of the colour, of the blue and hazel flecks racing in thin streaks across each iris. "If I was able to...to manage... to be a better... then maybe..."
The very though cut through him deeply, the wounds made worse by the fears he himself found mounting in his mind. "Sakura... what if it was me?"
"What?" she gasped in shock at the very concept that her lover would blame himself.
"You... you saw the kind of thing that's been happening to me." He saw the image in her mind - the sight of him hovering above the floor in her sister's apartment, wreathed in an unearthly glow, his mind sent racing across the face of the planet and back again.
She shook her head, refusing to accept that. "That was months after, itoshii. It could not have-"
"-but that was not the first time I had felt... something... contact me. Affect me. Change me." The tables had been turned the tables on that monster Zouken, bringing the hateful one to its knees before the final blow was struck. Seonac knew, now more than ever, how much he - they - owed that victory to a force unlike any other.
The force he knew awaited them at this journey's end. "And it's not over yet."
"Itoshii..." Sakura felt the weight of burden in her mind shift, but it was scant comfort.
"You are the one who were poorly-served by me, Sakura." If I were a normal human being, we wouldn't be in this mess.
If you were so, you wouldn't be the man I love. The words he thought had been kept to himself had crossed the bridge between them - as had her words of affirmation.
And there were more to come. "You wouldn't be the man who could give so much for me, who would have done all that you have done to save me... who should have the chance to show me the kind of life I want to live."
"Even if it leads you to a place like this?" he asked, despite himself - despite everything he could see in the link they shared which told him the answer.
"No distance is so far," she assured him, "to not be worth it."
Once again, she had astounded him. Her sheer depth of resolve, her astounding capacity for love and compassion, her gift at turning despondency into determination.
When they were together like this, he felt there was nothing they could not overcome.
"Sakura," he started to say, his mind turning to viewpoints he had not seen clearly before this point. "It may have been neither of us - we still don't know why things went as they are.
"In any case, we haven't lost. What we made together is waiting for us, to be brought home and cherished as a couple. As a partnership.
As a family."
She nodded, smiling again, looking forward to that future. Yet, the loose hand she stroked against her abdomen spoke of a wish left unfulfilled. "I know, itoshii. But still, I wish..."
He lifted one of his hands from her face and down to the one she held to her lower torso. "I know. I wish we could have done that, too."
Suddenly, a thought flashed through his mind like an electrical storm. "But you know what? I have an idea."
Sakura sensed that she was about to hear something she was going to like. "Tell me."
"Well, when this is done, and whatever's been going on with me is done and dusted, we can look and see if things are, if not back to normal, at least stable, or something.
Once we do that, we could... you know... try again."
Sakura smiled coyly at that one. "I thought we were going to settle for now with just the two, weren't we?"
"Well, yeah," he went on, "for the time being, anyway. But maybe, three to five years from now, once we're a little more settled in, maybe, if you want..."
"If I want..." she answered, hinting in her tone that by then, she just might do.
Seonac felt a wave of encouragement. "And then, we could be together, through it all - the way it ought to be."
That idea sounded about as appealing as any she had ever heard in her entire life. "We just might try that, itoshii!"
"Oh, just one thing." He thought of a matter his mind raced to, as he followed the internal logic of such a flow of events. "Promise me that , when the delivery comes, you won't ask me to wait outside.
"I want to be there."
She chuckled aloud at his request, knowing precisely what she would want in that situation. "I would not stand for you to be anywhere else, I promise you."
"That's good," he answered - noting how he had exhaled more heavily than he might have expected, given this was still a mainly hypothetical situation. "Just be gentle with my hand when you squeeze it, okay?"
Things had happened so quickly after I first heard the Call.
I could not recall the precise moment that It had reached across the distance from its lair to me and beckoned me forth… yet, once it had happened, I could not bring myself to think of a time I could not hear it.
At first, I relied to ignore Its beacon, to set it aside. There was so much we still had to do, to try and establish some kind of workable life for ourselves on the Island. There were so few of us left in our immediate circle, it felt wrong for me to take off and abandon what little remained.
Even so, the longer I tried to resist, the more patiently insistent the siren call remained. It was only a matter of time before I had to go.
------------------------------
My mother stood before me, her arm held before me, her eyes filled with that tell-tale mixture of sadness and determination. It wasn’t something I registered clearly as a child, but I now recognise that look as one which tells me that yet another irrevocable decision is about to be made.
“Andryusha,” she said, gesturing to the glowing runes on her right forearm with the outstretched fingertips of her left hand, “This is the legacy of your family – the sum of knowledge earned through generations’ worth of toil and sacrifice.”
Of course, I had known of her magic crest, which she had carried in secret during our long flight from our former homeland. Yet, I could not recall seeing it so clearly before. Was it due to carelessness on my part? The carefulness of my mother to hide it, to avoid its use, or at least to activate it in my presence? Or something else entirely?
In any event, as my eyes followed the intricate patterns the runes weaved upon her arm’s flesh, it had not occurred to me that it would not be on her arm forever.
“The time has come,” she affirmed, “for you to bear this burden, my son.”
------------------------------
The last time I saw her before I left Hong Kong was at the Queen’s Pier, in the shadow of the City Hall. It wasn’t that often that this pier was used for more than ceremonial roles, but the ferry currently docked there was an exception – the first step on the long journey It had set me upon.
“It won’t be that long, I promise,” I told her, though I could feel how my unspoken thoughts were likely betraying me. But then, I still couldn’t quite believe that the woman who had brought me into the world, who had sheltered me from one upheaval to the next, who had placed the future of the Muraviev lineage in my hands, would not be there at my side when I was to board that ferry.
Her arms wrapped around me, as we both shed tears at this departure. I could almost feel how her right arm was somehow… changed, even though to the untrained eye it would look no different to how it had been long before.
“Remember your training, my son,” she whispered to me, in a steady, measured tone. How many times had she channelled her emotions through the filter of reason like this? “And don’t worry for my sake. I’ll be here to welcome you back to the Island, no matter how long your journey takes you.”
Even through her concerns and fears – or, perhaps, through my own – she held fast to her deep faith in me. Her pride in how far we had gone to this point… and at what she believed I would one day become.
Would that it was so easy for me to share that belief in myself!
The boarding call sounded, signalling the end of this last moment of communion. “ Bol'šoe spasibo, Mama.” Thank you. For everything.
She looked at me, smiling softly. “Sčastlivogo puti, Andryusha.” Bon voyage.
Before I knew it, the ferry was pulling away, into Victoria Harbour – with the Island to one side and the southern shore of Kowloon on the other.
I was on my own.
------------------------------
From this latest water-borne transport I had taken on my journey, I could see the distinctive shoreline of the city of Belém recede into the distance. This gateway to the Amazon basin was already a hundred kilometres from the Atlantic Ocean, yet itself barely scratched the ever-changing surface of the mighty river.
Most of the traffic at the port seemed to be going in the opposite direction – taking the various resources plucked from trees, grown from soil or dug from the ground further into the basin, then sending them to wherever they were called upon to go. Perhaps even as far back as the Island itself.
That said, there were still many who had different reasons to go into the interior. Immigrants looking to build new lives away from their distant homelands, anthropologists searching for what to them were the strange, exotic tribespeople of the deep interior, missionaries seeking to yet further spread the already wide-ranging writ of the Vatican across this immense country. It might have surprised some, but for so large and so highly-populated a land, most of its major cities were tightly bound to the Atlantic coast. It could be hard to remember just how much there was, stretching under the vast canopy of the rainforest, rubbing shoulders with the far-ranging Andes mountains.
But then, was the same not true for many people in his land of birth? How many from the likes of Moscow or St. Petersbu… Leningrad truly registered the sheer distance one could travel to go to Irkutsk or Vladivostok?
The ones who had not been sent to count trees, that is.
I had come a long way already, but for some reason the flow of the Amazon seemed to stretch out longer for me than crossing the ocean had done. Of course, even the full length of this river – whichever way one might choose to define it – wasn’t close to the distance I had covered when crossing the Pacific Ocean. Yet, it somehow impressed itself upon me to a greater extent, even so.
But then, how much of that was due to my edging ever closer to my destination?
------------------------------
It’s harder for me to think back to the final stage of my journey.
I remember a living statue, its twin eyes glowing in starlight.
I remember a message, a deep meaning, which had been imparted to me – one which told of a long and lasting aching for a time long buried, glazed with the faintest layer of hope for salvation.
I remember passing through the forest, following tracks crossed time and again by men and women long turned to dust.
I remember the circle of rippling energy, the silent guide beckoning me towards it.
I remember…
The all-too-elusive glimpses at a deeper view of the universe.
The awe-inspiring weight of Its godlike consciousness reaching out towards me – as if both It and I were attempting to unlock a hundred thousand unseen barriers between a common level of understanding.
The waves of thought given form, the confluence of matter and energy coursing through every atom in my body, re-writing what – or even who – I was with every infinitesimal step taken in moments of time briefer than I had thought possible.
The groundswell of hope, of joy, of affirmation…
The all-too-closely-dangling promise of my true destiny…
All of it…
All of it…
So close…
But then…
------------------------------
…gone.
I was crumpled on the floor of my apartment, back in Central.
My hands… my arms… they were changed.
I could feel it – all of it – every ounce of my body which had been re-written.
I lifted myself up and tried to go to the mirror, but I couldn’t.
I couldn’t.
I couldn’t look.
At the thing I had become.
Why had It brought me so far?
To change me so utterly, yet not reveal what purpose it was to serve?
That I was to serve?
Destiny… had fallen to despair.
------------------------------
The next time I remembered being conscious of my surroundings, I was back in my human form… almost.
Almost.
Almost human!
I could see my face in the mirror, my arms, my hands…
But I could feel the places where I could never go back to normal.
“I still have a soul…” I caught myself whispering.
The thought repeated itself, as I stared at my reflection.
“I STILL HAVE A SOUL!”
I screamed, but no-one heard me.
It was only then that I realised there was no-one else present.
------------------------------
It took several days’ worth of searching for the truth to dawn on me.
After all that had happened, all of the changes I hadn’t asked to happen (or had I?), all of the irrevocable steps I had tumbled across…
She was gone.
------------------------------
“I’m sorry,” Andrei said weakly, as he lifted his fingertips away from the sides of Houri’s temple. “I can’t… I need more time to…”
Her eyes blinked as they adjusted to normality, or rather to the concept of her regular vision matching that of her own consciousness. After such a maelstrom of thought, memory and emotion, she found herself left literally speechless.
She held firmly onto his wrists, her eyes looking deeply into his own, as he looked to hers. Neither of them could speak for several moments, though there was more being understood in this exchange than mere words could encapsulate.
“It’s so powerful, azukaru,” she at length offered. “So much, I... don’t know where to start.”
Andrei exhaled more loudly than he realised, feeling a great weight lift from his shoulders. “Neither do I, except to say thank you. This… is the first time I have been able to try to come to terms with all of this. I… can’t summon the ways in which I can express how much this means to me, Houri.”
At that, the mention of her name, she drew his head to her shoulder, pressing her arms around him tightly. This man, who she had entrusted with her life, and who had rewarded this trust with such extraordinary effort, had in turn put his trust in her.
“No matter how long it takes, azukaru,” she assured him, “for you to work through your history… and for me to come to terms with mine… we will find our way together.”
He looked up at her once more, the last word caught upon his mind. “Together?”
He could have added a hundred lines or more to try and explain the many different questions he was asking in that one word – but before he had a chance to do so, she took her fingertips and placed them gently on the sides of his face, her palms resting against his cheeks.
She said but one word in turn. The only one which mattered.
So, after playing up to a certain section of HF last night (and after reading this piece I think you'll all know which section I refer to), I sat down and typed up this short bit mainly by emotion. I admit it's pretty much my own wish for how things had gone instead of what really happened.
Spoiler for A Change in Fate:
It hurt.
It hurt.
It hurt.
It was Saber’s only conscious thought as she struggled with the shadow at her feet. Assassin had disappeared, no doubt to heed the call of his Master; there was no need for him to stay and watch when he knew without a doubt that his prey was helplessly ensnared in his trap. Nothing was left but for Saber to die quietly, having used the last of her magical energy to fight off the hand that would have claimed her heart.
It’s painful.
It’s painful.
Why is it so painful?
But she was still alive, if a small thread of weak awareness could count as living. The shadow was certainly slow, she thought dully. Was it a living thing as well? Did it take pleasure out of her exhaustion, her weakness, her pain? Was in enjoying the fact that she had no way of fighting back, and as a result taking its time in finishing her off?
She still had enough awareness in her to know Assassin was gone. No doubt he had been called by his Master and saw no reason to stay when the end was inevitable.
Die.
Die.
I’m going to die.
Saber wondered. She certainly hadn’t sensed Assassin’s presence until the very last moment; was his Master the same? If that was true, and Assassin’s Master was nearby—indeed, in the very same temple—then his objective seemed clear enough. It had been a trap; certainly, the only target left to finish off now was Shirou. Her own Master.
She knew he would be killed. Shirou was stubborn to a fault; even if she was lost to him, he would still fight to discover the shadow and why it did what it did, because that was simply who he was. So long as he saw a threat to the lives of others, he would do everything in his power to try and save them. Anyone who even had an inkling of the boy’s personality would know this.
And if Assassin’s Master was smart, he (or she) would kill Shirou while he was defenseless. In the long run, he or she would save themselves a lot of trouble.
The corruption reached its target and seized her heart. With a gasped exclamation of pain, Saber blacked out.
Sighing, the blonde pulled back and lightly rested her shinai against her shoulder, watching as Fujimura Taiga—Fuji-nee, as she was more affectionately known to Shirou—collapsed into a crumbled heap on the floor of the dojo, panting and twitching. “I give,” the older woman whimpered again. “You win, Saber-chan.”
Saber shook her head. “For the record, I warned you.” It didn’t escape her notice that Taiga’s Japanese had changed; she had dropped the original, more formal ‘-san’ in favor of the more intimate, friendly ‘-chan’. Dismissing it, the blonde also sat down, folding her legs gracefully. “Would you like some water, Taiga?”
A weak hand waved back and forth. “Nah, just give me a minute. I haven’t sparred like that in ages.” Taiga laughed shakily. “Man, Saber-chan. You hide a lot of power in that tiny body.”
“I trained for many years to get this far.” The last part of Taiga’s sentence sank in, and Saber frowned. “And I’m not that tiny.”
Taiga laughed softly and closed her eyes; to herself, she admitted satisfaction. She had been wary of Saber at first, unable to truly judge her intentions, but sparring was as good a way as any to learn about someone. Saber was cool and calm under fire, methodical and sure of what she needed to do. A fitting personality, the English teacher mused, for someone so determined to protect Shirou.
“Ne, Saber-chan.”
Saber blinked and was immediately at attention. “Yes?”
“You be good to Shirou, you hear?” Getting some of her energy back, Taiga sat up and gently flicked the blonde on the nose. “He’s a stubborn fool who will insist otherwise, but he needs protection when he decides to play superhero. You said you’ll protect him, so I’m leaving him in your hands from now on, okay?” She grinned.
Saber blinked again, stunned into silence. This wasn’t a game. There was nothing but pure, honest trust in Taiga’s words. “Taiga…”
“Give it your best shot, okay? I’m really counting on you.”
The Heroic Spirit wavered only an instant before she smiled and nodded. “I shall. I can assure you, I will do the very best I can to keep Shirou safe.”
Chuckling, Taiga fell onto her back and closed her eyes.
Her eyes snapped open. The shadow was pulling her in; it would only take a few more seconds and she would be absorbed completely.
“I’m really counting on you.”
“Let me out.” It rumbled from her throat like a growl, and Saber felt her scant magical energy gathering within her, nothing but sheer willpower keeping her aware and willing to fight. She knew what she was about to do was suicidal.
She didn’t care. She had done crazier things when she had lived.
“I will do the very best I can to keep Shirou safe.”
“Let. Me. OUT!!”
The cry escaped her as a roar of fury and determination; the surge of magical power that coursed through her body was painful and nearly enough to make Saber black out as brilliant colors and bright flashes of white light blinded her. In her hand, her sword flashed gold, rays of light chasing away the darkness of the hallway.
Let me out. Let me out let me out let me out I promised let me out I don’t want to die like this let me out let me out she said protect him let me out let me out out let me I promised out out me let me out I can still save him let me out—
I promised.
Beneath her feet, the gathering shadow shrieked in agony at the attack of wind and light; even its wish to devour was unable to match her will. With the last of her strength and a burst of speed, Saber jumped away from the shadow, stumbled, lost her footing, and collapsed in the hallway, trembling and panting. Her sword clattered to the ground and skidded only a few inches beyond her fingertips.
The shadow didn’t pursue her. Instinctively, she knew; it was gone. With the last of her power, she had managed to escape and scare it off.
Her muscles trembled and she tried to rise; but she was too weak. She had done something nearly impossible, even for one of her class; it was only natural that she felt completely sapped of strength after accomplishing such a feat.
“I have… to…. Shirou…” The words escaped her softly, weakly, but she knew it was a lost cause as her vision once more began to dim. She would survive this, but she wouldn’t have the strength to save her Master. “Somebody…. Please….” And so, her last words were a request, a plea to anyone who was listening.
“Please…. Save…. My Master…”
She passed out. Bathed in moonlight, the Servant known as Saber finally lost consciousness, and slept. Her aching body would let her do nothing else.
Outside the temple, a shadow twitched, then leaped down from the trees and shot towards the main room where Shirou was. It was only by chance that she had heard the weak request; it was Saber’s luck that her Master’s orders perfectly matched that same request.
And deep within her heart, as she slept, the corruption of the shadow painlessly made its nest and began its work.
So, yeah, "Saber lives" situation here. I have to admit I don't know if she could have escaped the shadow even if she wanted to, but it was something I felt like writing.
I'm debating on doing further parts; mainly to show Shirou's reaction and possibly Sakura's. I can't see this being very long, considering that I haven't played far enough into HF to accurately retell the story from the "What if" of Saber surviving.
Spoiler for Author's Notes:
1. One of the small changes here being that Assassin leaves. If I remember right, I believe in the game he stays until the very last minute, but I'm not sure. I could see him leaving after Saber protects her heart; after all, by that point all of her mana would be spent, and thus she would have no way of escaping. Obviously, in this scenario, that would come back to bite him in the ass.
2. The flashback sequence with Taiga was partially inspired/based on a similar sequence in a side story of the manga, in which Taiga asked Saber to look after Shirou. Considering how seriously Saber takes her "protect Shirou" duties in Heaven's Feel, if Taiga requested it of her, I think it would only make her more determined.
3. Foreshadowing in the last few lines that even if Saber survived, she isn't out of the clear just yet. I think it's logical to assume that even if she had escaped the shadow, Saber would have still been even slightly corrupted; hence, the last few lines of this short.
Location: Pennsylvania. It's sort of like a real state.
Age: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam
So, after playing up to a certain section of HF last night (and after reading this piece I think you'll all know which section I refer to), I sat down and typed up this short bit mainly by emotion. I admit it's pretty much my own wish for how things had gone instead of what really happened.
Spoiler for A Change in Fate:
It hurt.
It hurt.
It hurt.
It was Saber’s only conscious thought as she struggled with the shadow at her feet. Assassin had disappeared, no doubt to heed the call of his Master; there was no need for him to stay and watch when he knew without a doubt that his prey was helplessly ensnared in his trap. Nothing was left but for Saber to die quietly, having used the last of her magical energy to fight off the hand that would have claimed her heart.
It’s painful.
It’s painful.
Why is it so painful?
But she was still alive, if a small thread of weak awareness could count as living. The shadow was certainly slow, she thought dully. Was it a living thing as well? Did it take pleasure out of her exhaustion, her weakness, her pain? Was in enjoying the fact that she had no way of fighting back, and as a result taking its time in finishing her off?
She still had enough awareness in her to know Assassin was gone. No doubt he had been called by his Master and saw no reason to stay when the end was inevitable.
Die.
Die.
I’m going to die.
Saber wondered. She certainly hadn’t sensed Assassin’s presence until the very last moment; was his Master the same? If that was true, and Assassin’s Master was nearby—indeed, in the very same temple—then his objective seemed clear enough. It had been a trap; certainly, the only target left to finish off now was Shirou. Her own Master.
She knew he would be killed. Shirou was stubborn to a fault; even if she was lost to him, he would still fight to discover the shadow and why it did what it did, because that was simply who he was. So long as he saw a threat to the lives of others, he would do everything in his power to try and save them. Anyone who even had an inkling of the boy’s personality would know this.
And if Assassin’s Master was smart, he (or she) would kill Shirou while he was defenseless. In the long run, he or she would save themselves a lot of trouble.
The corruption reached its target and seized her heart. With a gasped exclamation of pain, Saber blacked out.
Sighing, the blonde pulled back and lightly rested her shinai against her shoulder, watching as Fujimura Taiga—Fuji-nee, as she was more affectionately known to Shirou—collapsed into a crumbled heap on the floor of the dojo, panting and twitching. “I give,” the older woman whimpered again. “You win, Saber-chan.”
Saber shook her head. “For the record, I warned you.” It didn’t escape her notice that Taiga’s Japanese had changed; she had dropped the original, more formal ‘-san’ in favor of the more intimate, friendly ‘-chan’. Dismissing it, the blonde also sat down, folding her legs gracefully. “Would you like some water, Taiga?”
A weak hand waved back and forth. “Nah, just give me a minute. I haven’t sparred like that in ages.” Taiga laughed shakily. “Man, Saber-chan. You hide a lot of power in that tiny body.”
“I trained for many years to get this far.” The last part of Taiga’s sentence sank in, and Saber frowned. “And I’m not that tiny.”
Taiga laughed softly and closed her eyes; to herself, she admitted satisfaction. She had been wary of Saber at first, unable to truly judge her intentions, but sparring was as good a way as any to learn about someone. Saber was cool and calm under fire, methodical and sure of what she needed to do. A fitting personality, the English teacher mused, for someone so determined to protect Shirou.
“Ne, Saber-chan.”
Saber blinked and was immediately at attention. “Yes?”
“You be good to Shirou, you hear?” Getting some of her energy back, Taiga sat up and gently flicked the blonde on the nose. “He’s a stubborn fool who will insist otherwise, but he needs protection when he decides to play superhero. You said you’ll protect him, so I’m leaving him in your hands from now on, okay?” She grinned.
Saber blinked again, stunned into silence. This wasn’t a game. There was nothing but pure, honest trust in Taiga’s words. “Taiga…”
“Give it your best shot, okay? I’m really counting on you.”
The Heroic Spirit wavered only an instant before she smiled and nodded. “I shall. I can assure you, I will do the very best I can to keep Shirou safe.”
Chuckling, Taiga fell onto her back and closed her eyes.
Her eyes snapped open. The shadow was pulling her in; it would only take a few more seconds and she would be absorbed completely.
“I’m really counting on you.”
“Let me out.” It rumbled from her throat like a growl, and Saber felt her scant magical energy gathering within her, nothing but sheer willpower keeping her aware and willing to fight. She knew what she was about to do was suicidal.
She didn’t care. She had done crazier things when she had lived.
“I will do the very best I can to keep Shirou safe.”
“Let. Me. OUT!!”
The cry escaped her as a roar of fury and determination; the surge of magical power that coursed through her body was painful and nearly enough to make Saber black out as brilliant colors and bright flashes of white light blinded her. In her hand, her sword flashed gold, rays of light chasing away the darkness of the hallway.
Let me out. Let me out let me out let me out I promised let me out I don’t want to die like this let me out let me out she said protect him let me out let me out out let me I promised out out me let me out I can still save him let me out—
I promised.
Beneath her feet, the gathering shadow shrieked in agony at the attack of wind and light; even its wish to devour was unable to match her will. With the last of her strength and a burst of speed, Saber jumped away from the shadow, stumbled, lost her footing, and collapsed in the hallway, trembling and panting. Her sword clattered to the ground and skidded only a few inches beyond her fingertips.
The shadow didn’t pursue her. Instinctively, she knew; it was gone. With the last of her power, she had managed to escape and scare it off.
Her muscles trembled and she tried to rise; but she was too weak. She had done something nearly impossible, even for one of her class; it was only natural that she felt completely sapped of strength after accomplishing such a feat.
“I have… to…. Shirou…” The words escaped her softly, weakly, but she knew it was a lost cause as her vision once more began to dim. She would survive this, but she wouldn’t have the strength to save her Master. “Somebody…. Please….” And so, her last words were a request, a plea to anyone who was listening.
“Please…. Save…. My Master…”
She passed out. Bathed in moonlight, the Servant known as Saber finally lost consciousness, and slept. Her aching body would let her do nothing else.
Outside the temple, a shadow twitched, then leaped down from the trees and shot towards the main room where Shirou was. It was only by chance that she had heard the weak request; it was Saber’s luck that her Master’s orders perfectly matched that same request.
And deep within her heart, as she slept, the corruption of the shadow painlessly made its nest and began its work.
So, yeah, "Saber lives" situation here. I have to admit I don't know if she could have escaped the shadow even if she wanted to, but it was something I felt like writing.
I'm debating on doing further parts; mainly to show Shirou's reaction and possibly Sakura's. I can't see this being very long, considering that I haven't played far enough into HF to accurately retell the story from the "What if" of Saber surviving.
Spoiler for Author's Notes:
1. One of the small changes here being that Assassin leaves. If I remember right, I believe in the game he stays until the very last minute, but I'm not sure. I could see him leaving after Saber protects her heart; after all, by that point all of her mana would be spent, and thus she would have no way of escaping. Obviously, in this scenario, that would come back to bite him in the ass.
2. The flashback sequence with Taiga was partially inspired/based on a similar sequence in a side story of the manga, in which Taiga asked Saber to look after Shirou. Considering how seriously Saber takes her "protect Shirou" duties in Heaven's Feel, if Taiga requested it of her, I think it would only make her more determined.
3. Foreshadowing in the last few lines that even if Saber survived, she isn't out of the clear just yet. I think it's logical to assume that even if she had escaped the shadow, Saber would have still been even slightly corrupted; hence, the last few lines of this short.
Spoilers for both the above story and HF, so...
Spoiler for Reply:
Um... wow. That is both kind of heartwarming and really almost more sad than what actually happened, given the ending's implication that maybe even though she survived she only delayed the inevitable.
And actually, I don't see why it couldn't have happened. Damaging the Shadow is possible, and it's not totally inescapable; Berserker managed to briefly get away and possibly could have escaped completely if Dark Saber had not been there to prevent it. Granted, he did it by tearing off his own skin where the Shadow had touched it, but... hey.
Um... wow. That is both kind of heartwarming and really almost more sad than what actually happened, given the ending's implication that maybe even though she survived she only delayed the inevitable.
And actually, I don't see why it couldn't have happened. Damaging the Shadow is possible, and it's not totally inescapable; Berserker managed to briefly get away and possibly could have escaped completely if Dark Saber had not been there to prevent it. Granted, he did it by tearing off his own skin where the Shadow had touched it, but... hey.
Spoilers for the above mentioned pair, so tags ahoy!
Spoiler for Reply to Moczo's reply:
Well, really, what I was hinting at in the end with those lines was that at worst she may still have the potential to become corrupted and transform into Alter, depending on the situation. Because honestly, even for Saber, I couldn't see her escaping the Shadow without being hurt in some way, even if she fought her hardest to escape. So yeah, she definitely survived here, but as I said earlier, she's not out of the woods yet.
In any case, currently I'm also thinking of doing a second part from Shirou's POV on finding Saber, just because. This piece definitely says she lived, but I'd also like to have some closure of Shirou finding her and bringing her home.
Location: Pennsylvania. It's sort of like a real state.
Age: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam
Spoilers for the above mentioned pair, so tags ahoy!
Spoiler for Reply to Moczo's reply:
Well, really, what I was hinting at in the end with those lines was that at worst she may still have the potential to become corrupted and transform into Alter, depending on the situation. Because honestly, even for Saber, I couldn't see her escaping the Shadow without being hurt in some way, even if she fought her hardest to escape. So yeah, she definitely survived here, but as I said earlier, she's not out of the woods yet.
In any case, currently I'm also thinking of doing a second part from Shirou's POV on finding Saber, just because. This piece definitely says she lived, but I'd also like to have some closure of Shirou finding her and bringing her home.
Made my thoughts clearer in our conversation, I hope. Yeah, it's more hopeful than the canon, but there's still that element of sadness in there if you look. Though you're right, it would have been too unrealistic for there to be no consequences.
And I hope you do continue, because I'd read any continuation you chose to do.
It's an interesting topic, actually, to ask what would have happened had Saber still been around. I'd imagine Shirou would still have fallen for Sakura in the same was as he did in HF, and the Shirou-Shinji battle would have gone the same way because Shirou would have told Saber to remain at home (she'd likely have come along with Rin, though). The following fight would have been interesting, because whereas Archer was intending to kill Sakura, Saber would likely have fought Rider (and, really, Rider wouldn't have stood a chance 2-on-1) but Shirou would have stopped her from killing Sakura. Rider would likely have been defeated, though, which would have changed things somewhat.
No idea where it would have gone from there. It could have turned out better than the true route (perhaps with an ending much like HF True, only with Saber remaining rather than Rider, or even with both), or it could be that having Saber around would have forced Shirou to kill Sakura, thereby causing him to break down and making for a thoroughly unhappy ending.
Yes, well, like I mentioned earlier I haven't played far enough into HF yet to really know how majorly having Saber around would have changed the route, so I doubt it'll be developed into a full story (and even if I did, my fangirl-ism would ultimately turn it into a Saber/Shirou story to begin with, which wouldn't work as well in a Sakura route). At most I'm thinking I'll just do a part where Shirou finds Saber, a part for what happens when they return home, and a part for the morning after. Either way it'll end up being a short fic.
Well, there's no way that HF could plausibly have developed into Shirou x Saber, even if Saber had survived, because Shirou's relationship with Sakura would invariably develop first. And, yeah, there's no way HF could have worked out well if Shirou was with Saber, and indeed if that happened Saber would simply end up getting swallowed whole later on, either due to being subconsciously targetted by the shadow, or consciously targetted by Dark Sakura when Sakura succumbed.
So I have, like, other, longer fics I should be updating, but the plotbunny for this one has latched firmly onto my mind. It's eating my brain until I update. So here, have part 2.
Spoiler for A Change in Fate, part 2:
His hand was burning.
Shirou instinctively knew what it meant. Saber was in trouble. He didn’t know what kind of trouble; he didn’t know if she was badly wounded, if she was dying, if she had depleted her store of mana, or if she had already died. He just knew that his hand burned, his hand that carried his Command Spell, and it burned because Saber was in trouble.
He quickly dismissed the thought that Saber was dead. His left hand was in agony, but if Saber had died, his Command Spell would have faded by now, or at least would have hurt far more than it did. She was alive, at the very least.
I have to find her.
Gritting his teeth and rubbing the back of his hand in a vain attempt to soothe it, Shirou lifted his head. The moonlight spilled through the room once more, bathing everything it touched silver; Zouken was long gone, and he had taken his worms and his scent of rotting meat with him. The only ones currently in the room were Shirou and Rider. The Servant in question seemed relaxed enough, at ease with the situation.
Shirou had questions, but they could wait. He turned on his heel and flew to the door Saber had shut behind her only minutes before, and this time when he pounded on it, it flew open with a slam that made Rider jump.
“Saber, are you—“
The words froze in his throat before they even left his lips. Stunned into silence, he could only stare.
A small patch of blood stained the floor; dried blood, brown blood, blood that would flake and crack under his touch. Obviously, someone had been wounded in the fight between Saber and Assassin. But it was not the patch of blood that had caught Shirou’s eye, that had made him freeze.
She lay motionless beneath the moonlight, her silver armor glimmering and flashing at the gentlest touch of light. Even her golden hair, her skin, seemed touched silver by the moon; only a few inches beyond her fingertips lay her sword, revealed from its cover of invisible air, gleaming softly.
“S-Sa…. ber.” He swallowed the lump in his throat. “Saber?”
He couldn’t tell if she was breathing.
With legs that trembled Shirou crossed the distance that separated him from his partner; he was only dimly aware of Rider at his back, the purple-haired Servant watching everything silently. In a moment that seemed to last both an eternity and a millisecond, he finally knelt down, resting a shaking hand gently on her shoulder. “Saber?” he whispered.
She felt warm beneath his touch; her armor, despite looking cold from a distance, was surprisingly warm. Taking deep breaths he slid his fingers lower, to her throat, until he finally pressed gently against her pulse.
He felt it, then. A strong pulse, a steady beat. Saber was still alive.
The strength drained from Shirou’s body then; he blew out a long, ragged breath and slumped, his shaking hand resting on Saber’s hair as he trembled, head bowed. “Thank God,” he whispered hoarsely, closing his eyes. “Thank God….”
He was distracted from his thoughts by the soft sound of rustling movement; with grace he hadn’t known she possessed, Rider knelt down beside Saber. “She’s still unconscious,” she murmured, “and you are injured. I will carry her.”
True to her word, Rider carried Saber to the gates of the temple. Shirou was honestly surprised; either Rider was stronger than she looked, or Saber was even smaller than he had previously thought. Finally, he cleared his throat. “I’ll take her now,” he said softly.
She looked at him. Behind her mask, Shirou had the acute feeling she had lifted a brow.
“I can carry her,” he muttered. “My wounds are already healing. If I go slow and take it easy, we’ll both make it home in one piece.”
Rider continued to look at him. Just as Shirou was beginning to wonder if she would hold his Servant hostage, she sighed and shook her head. He thought she would say something then, but she passed him Saber wordlessly. “Would you like me to walk you home?” she asked as he shifted his arms, getting a good, firm grip on Saber.
He shook his head, gently checking to make sure Saber was as comfortable as she could be. “My debt to you is already deep as it is,” he said, looking directly at where he assumed her eyes were. “If I accepted anymore help from you, it would make things difficult when we meet in battle.”
There was a beat of silence; finally, the agile Servant chuckled and nodded in agreement. “Fair enough. We’ll part ways here, then.” She turned her back to him, heading into the trees.
“….” Shirou sighed. “Rider.”
She paused and looked back at him. “It’s too late to change your mind.”
“Not that.” He took a deep breath before he bowed his head to her. “Thank you. You saved my life back there. And you helped me with Saber.” He lifted his eyes and once more met her gaze. “So… thanks.”
There was another beat of silence; finally, Rider turned away. “You don’t have to thank me,” she murmured. “I simply followed my Master’s order.” With that, she disappeared into the trees like a shadow, so light on her feet that Shirou didn’t even hear her leave.
He gazed at the trees for a long moment; finally, Shirou turned away and left the temple, his grip on Saber firm and steady, yet gentle enough so she wouldn’t wake.
She never stirred once the whole way home.
For being rather.... I suppose, quiet is the right word, Rider was a lot of fun to write in this section. She doesn't say much, but there was something about writing her that I really liked.
Spoiler for Author's Notes:
1. According to the game, a Master doesn't lose their Command Spell until they lose their Servant; Shirou didn't fully lose his Command Spell, as I recall, until he said goodbye to the place where Saber had fallen. I originally had a line where he thought his Command Spell would have disappeared if Saber died, but then I remembered it didn't disappear until he actually saw the place, so instead I changed it to say that his hand would have hurt worse if Saber was gone.
2. In my head, I justified Shirou checking Saber's pulse to make sure she was alive because as they are in the game, despite being spirits, Heroic Spirits are also shown to be capable of human form; they can bleed, and eat, and breathe just like humans, so I naturally assumed that like humans they would have a pulse. Of course, whether or not they would need one is subject for debate, but eh.
3. I had a bit of a debate with myself over Shirou's "Thank God" line since it's never remotely stated that he believes in God to begin with, but to me it's more of an emotional response than a religious response, and I felt it fit.
4. I also justified Shirou going to Saber instead of just using a Command Spell to bring her to him by thinking that, even if she survived the shadow, she would have been way too exhausted to heed his command to come even if she tried, kind of like how Rider tried to obey Shinji's order to keep fighting but couldn't because she was too badly wounded.
1. According to the game, a Master doesn't lose their Command Spell until they lose their Servant; Shirou didn't fully lose his Command Spell, as I recall, until he said goodbye to the place where Saber had fallen. I originally had a line where he thought his Command Spell would have disappeared if Saber died, but then I remembered it didn't disappear until he actually saw the place, so instead I changed it to say that his hand would have hurt worse if Saber was gone.
Actually, masters don't lose their command spell until they accept that they're no longer a master. Since Shirou has no interest in the war itself, for him that means when he accepts that Saber is gone, hence why Shirou loses them when he sees the place where she had fallen and says goodbye. It's the point where Shirou accepts that he's lost his servant and, thus, no longer has the right to be a master. However, for someone like Rin in UBW, she retains her command spells even when she's betrayed by Archer, because she doesn't accept that she's no longer a master, hence why she can contract with Saber. However, once the servant dies, the command spells fade, as if they had all been used (if the person makes a new contract with a servant, they get three command spells again), so that would be the distinction (not that Shirou would know that).
Quote:
2. In my head, I justified Shirou checking Saber's pulse to make sure she was alive because as they are in the game, despite being spirits, Heroic Spirits are also shown to be capable of human form; they can bleed, and eat, and breathe just like humans, so I naturally assumed that like humans they would have a pulse. Of course, whether or not they would need one is subject for debate, but eh.
Well, I'd imagine that they do have a pulse, however it's pretty strongly hinted that servants only do human things like breathing because they used to be human. A servant does indeed breathe, but a servant couldn't suffocate, and similarly a servant can't bleed to death. There is, however, an easy way to know if a servant is dead, because a dead servant vanishes. Having said that, once again Shirou would likely not be aware of this, so it's quite plausible for him to try taking her pulse to check.
Actually, masters don't lose their command spell until they accept that they're no longer a master. Since Shirou has no interest in the war itself, for him that means when he accepts that Saber is gone, hence why Shirou loses them when he sees the place where she had fallen and says goodbye. It's the point where Shirou accepts that he's lost his servant and, thus, no longer has the right to be a master. However, for someone like Rin in UBW, she retains her command spells even when she's betrayed by Archer, because she doesn't accept that she's no longer a master, hence why she can contract with Saber. However, once the servant dies, the command spells fade, as if they had all been used (if the person makes a new contract with a servant, they get three command spells again), so that would be the distinction (not that Shirou would know that).
Well, I'd imagine that they do have a pulse, however it's pretty strongly hinted that servants only do human things like breathing because they used to be human. A servant does indeed breathe, but a servant couldn't suffocate, and similarly a servant can't bleed to death. There is, however, an easy way to know if a servant is dead, because a dead servant vanishes. Having said that, once again Shirou would likely not be aware of this, so it's quite plausible for him to try taking her pulse to check.
Spoiler for Game:
Ah, I have to admit I wasn't really aware of any of that because up until this point, at least with the Command Spells, it was only implied that if a Master accepted their Servant was gone they gave up the right (unless I missed something way back when, and the only one who I know who actually accepted this was Shirou and possibly Kotomine), and I have to admit I preferred the idea of Shirou checking her pulse to Shirou saying "Okay, she hasn't disappeared, so she's alive." Rule of Drama for me, I guess. But I'm glad it still held up anyway; thank you for the comments!
Location: Pennsylvania. It's sort of like a real state.
Age: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam
So I have, like, other, longer fics I should be updating, but the plotbunny for this one has latched firmly onto my mind. It's eating my brain until I update. So here, have part 2.
Spoiler for A Change in Fate, part 2:
His hand was burning.
Shirou instinctively knew what it meant. Saber was in trouble. He didn’t know what kind of trouble; he didn’t know if she was badly wounded, if she was dying, if she had depleted her store of mana, or if she had already died. He just knew that his hand burned, his hand that carried his Command Spell, and it burned because Saber was in trouble.
He quickly dismissed the thought that Saber was dead. His left hand was in agony, but if Saber had died, his Command Spell would have faded by now, or at least would have hurt far more than it did. She was alive, at the very least.
I have to find her.
Gritting his teeth and rubbing the back of his hand in a vain attempt to soothe it, Shirou lifted his head. The moonlight spilled through the room once more, bathing everything it touched silver; Zouken was long gone, and he had taken his worms and his scent of rotting meat with him. The only ones currently in the room were Shirou and Rider. The Servant in question seemed relaxed enough, at ease with the situation.
Shirou had questions, but they could wait. He turned on his heel and flew to the door Saber had shut behind her only minutes before, and this time when he pounded on it, it flew open with a slam that made Rider jump.
“Saber, are you—“
The words froze in his throat before they even left his lips. Stunned into silence, he could only stare.
A small patch of blood stained the floor; dried blood, brown blood, blood that would flake and crack under his touch. Obviously, someone had been wounded in the fight between Saber and Assassin. But it was not the patch of blood that had caught Shirou’s eye, that had made him freeze.
She lay motionless beneath the moonlight, her silver armor glimmering and flashing at the gentlest touch of light. Even her golden hair, her skin, seemed touched silver by the moon; only a few inches beyond her fingertips lay her sword, revealed from its cover of invisible air, gleaming softly.
“S-Sa…. ber.” He swallowed the lump in his throat. “Saber?”
He couldn’t tell if she was breathing.
With legs that trembled Shirou crossed the distance that separated him from his partner; he was only dimly aware of Rider at his back, the purple-haired Servant watching everything silently. In a moment that seemed to last both an eternity and a millisecond, he finally knelt down, resting a shaking hand gently on her shoulder. “Saber?” he whispered.
She felt warm beneath his touch; her armor, despite looking cold from a distance, was surprisingly warm. Taking deep breaths he slid his fingers lower, to her throat, until he finally pressed gently against her pulse.
He felt it, then. A strong pulse, a steady beat. Saber was still alive.
The strength drained from Shirou’s body then; he blew out a long, ragged breath and slumped, his shaking hand resting on Saber’s hair as he trembled, head bowed. “Thank God,” he whispered hoarsely, closing his eyes. “Thank God….”
He was distracted from his thoughts by the soft sound of rustling movement; with grace he hadn’t known she possessed, Rider knelt down beside Saber. “She’s still unconscious,” she murmured, “and you are injured. I will carry her.”
True to her word, Rider carried Saber to the gates of the temple. Shirou was honestly surprised; either Rider was stronger than she looked, or Saber was even smaller than he had previously thought. Finally, he cleared his throat. “I’ll take her now,” he said softly.
She looked at him. Behind her mask, Shirou had the acute feeling she had lifted a brow.
“I can carry her,” he muttered. “My wounds are already healing. If I go slow and take it easy, we’ll both make it home in one piece.”
Rider continued to look at him. Just as Shirou was beginning to wonder if she would hold his Servant hostage, she sighed and shook her head. He thought she would say something then, but she passed him Saber wordlessly. “Would you like me to walk you home?” she asked as he shifted his arms, getting a good, firm grip on Saber.
He shook his head, gently checking to make sure Saber was as comfortable as she could be. “My debt to you is already deep as it is,” he said, looking directly at where he assumed her eyes were. “If I accepted anymore help from you, it would make things difficult when we meet in battle.”
There was a beat of silence; finally, the agile Servant chuckled and nodded in agreement. “Fair enough. We’ll part ways here, then.” She turned her back to him, heading into the trees.
“….” Shirou sighed. “Rider.”
She paused and looked back at him. “It’s too late to change your mind.”
“Not that.” He took a deep breath before he bowed his head to her. “Thank you. You saved my life back there. And you helped me with Saber.” He lifted his eyes and once more met her gaze. “So… thanks.”
There was another beat of silence; finally, Rider turned away. “You don’t have to thank me,” she murmured. “I simply followed my Master’s order.” With that, she disappeared into the trees like a shadow, so light on her feet that Shirou didn’t even hear her leave.
He gazed at the trees for a long moment; finally, Shirou turned away and left the temple, his grip on Saber firm and steady, yet gentle enough so she wouldn’t wake.
She never stirred once the whole way home.
For being rather.... I suppose, quiet is the right word, Rider was a lot of fun to write in this section. She doesn't say much, but there was something about writing her that I really liked.
Spoiler for Author's Notes:
1. According to the game, a Master doesn't lose their Command Spell until they lose their Servant; Shirou didn't fully lose his Command Spell, as I recall, until he said goodbye to the place where Saber had fallen. I originally had a line where he thought his Command Spell would have disappeared if Saber died, but then I remembered it didn't disappear until he actually saw the place, so instead I changed it to say that his hand would have hurt worse if Saber was gone.
2. In my head, I justified Shirou checking Saber's pulse to make sure she was alive because as they are in the game, despite being spirits, Heroic Spirits are also shown to be capable of human form; they can bleed, and eat, and breathe just like humans, so I naturally assumed that like humans they would have a pulse. Of course, whether or not they would need one is subject for debate, but eh.
3. I had a bit of a debate with myself over Shirou's "Thank God" line since it's never remotely stated that he believes in God to begin with, but to me it's more of an emotional response than a religious response, and I felt it fit.
4. I also justified Shirou going to Saber instead of just using a Command Spell to bring her to him by thinking that, even if she survived the shadow, she would have been way too exhausted to heed his command to come even if she tried, kind of like how Rider tried to obey Shinji's order to keep fighting but couldn't because she was too badly wounded.
As before, quite good. Not really any spoilers here since there was no part that really jumped at me for comment; everyone was in-character, the events made logical sense, and overall it was just a good quality short. Looking forward to the rest.
So, update time. This one struggled with me a bit, but in the end I like how it turned out. Hopefully you'll agree with me. Also, this is the longest section thus far, and probably the piece that steps the furthest away from canon.
Spoiler for A Change in Fate, part 3:
During the walk home, Saber’s armor faded away and was replaced by her usual house clothes. Shirou had to admit he was relieved; it was bad enough they were getting home late, but it would have been even harder if he’d had to change her. He cared deeply for his partner, but even that would have pushed his limits.
She whimpered and trembled occasionally in his arms, but otherwise Saber didn’t wake. By the time he was by the gate of his home, Shirou was too worried about his Servant to even notice the brightly burning light. He had seen no wounds or signs of injury when he had finally been able to reach Saber, yet she still slept.
It worried him. Bruises and cuts, scrapes and broken bones, those were injuries he could treat. But if Saber bore a wound that ran deeper, something inside of her, then there was nothing he could do but trust that she was strong enough to recover from it on her own.
She did so much to save me, but in the end I can’t even treat her wounds.
“Senpai?”
The soft, surprised voice snapped him out of his thoughts; he’d entered the house without even realizing it. Lifting his eyes, he met the confused, uncertain purple gaze of Sakura. “Sakura.” He blinked. “Um…. Did you wait for us?” He only dimly remembered the light burning outside, but he had headed for it instinctively, knowing it meant home, safety. It had to be nearly three in the morning. So, if she waited for us…
“Ah, no, no, no!” Hastily Sakura shook her head, lifting her hands in denial. “I was just… um… I had to go to the bathroom, you see, and I happened to be passing by right when you came in….”
What followed next was an awkward silence. She’s lying, Shirou thought, barely repressing a sigh. But in any case, he was in no mood to call her out on it, and besides… he had to admit it was sweet, that she had waited. “Is that so?”
“U-um, yes.” Sakura took a deep breath. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“It’s my own fault. I was too busy thinking.”
The purple-haired girl nodded; after a moment, she stepped closer. “What happened to Saber-san?” Despite the conversation between the two of them, the Servant continued to sleep unaware, save the occasional twitch and tremor of her body.
“She…” What was he supposed to say? Sakura was innocent in this. She wasn’t a magus, and she knew nothing of the Holy Grail War. He couldn’t tell her the truth of what had happened to Saber, even if he wanted to. The best he could give her was a half truth. “We got separated tonight,” he said at last. “She protected me, but… I think she may have been in over her head this time.”
At those words, he saw something in Sakura’s eyes shift. Before Shirou fully had time to register it, she stepped closer and gently brushed her fingers through golden strands of hair that had fallen into Saber’s eyes. “But she doesn’t seem injured…”
“I know. I don’t really know what happened to her. I think if she’s injured, it’s somewhere inside.” Shirou tightened his grip on his sleeping Servant. “I’m going to keep watch over her tonight. At the very least, if something happens to her, I can be there to help.”
Not that there’s much I can do even then. If her injury is internal, there’s no way I can treat it.
“Do you want me to join you, Senpai?” Sakura’s soft question snapped him out of his reverie yet again; she looked up at him with concern. “I can keep you company.”
He smiled and shook his head. “Thank you, but you sleep, Sakura. If you stayed up because of this, Saber would scold me when she wakes up for worrying you.”
At that, the younger girl squeaked softly and blushed slightly; feeling the matter was settled, Shirou moved past her and headed down the hall to Saber’s room.
“Besides… it’s my fault this happened to her. If I had stayed with her, maybe she’d have woken up by now.”
With those last words, he left Sakura alone in the hall.
She couldn’t sleep after Senpai left and she had no urge to go back to her room and stare at the ceiling, so Sakura went into the kitchen. She didn’t know what she was doing, working with only half a mind as she rummaged through the cabinets; she was simply moving for the sake of moving, keeping her body busy.
She didn’t come back to her senses until a soft scene invaded her nose and she realized she had made a cup of English tea; the flavor Saber always preferred. The blonde had taken well to Japanese food and customs, but she still had a weak spot for the occasional English taste when she was given the chance.
Why did I make this? It’s not like she’s awake to drink it.
Quietly, Sakura stared down at the cup. She lowered her head slightly, her hair spilling across her face and shielding her eyes from the light of the room.
She knew how she was supposed to feel; angry. Angry that Saber was still alive, that she was still a threat, that because of her Senpai would continue to go out late at night and come home with injures of some kind, even if he said they weren’t serious. And on some level, she was angry. But yet, on another level…
“She protected me, but… I think she may have been in over her head this time.”
Quietly, her hands curled into fists. Her nails bit down into the skin of her palm, causing small bloody crescents to form. She bit down hard on her bottom lip.
“She protected me.”
Is it because of what I said to her?
She was angry that Saber had lived, but at the same time…. She was relieved that she had survived and kept Senpai safe.
On the counter, the fresh cup of English tea began to cool.
Shirou briefly considered changing Saber for bed, took a moment to imagine every possible scenario that could unfold from it as a result, then hastily rejected the idea. It wouldn’t kill his Servant to spend one night sleeping in her usual clothes. Thankfully, as a result he only had to tuck her in and flick off the light, then stood bathed in the darkness.
He had told Sakura he intended to watch over Saber tonight. He had meant it, but now he wasn’t sure if that was the best idea. Spending a whole night by Saber’s side could be enough to drive him crazy… but deep down, he knew he owed it to her. Besides, there was little he could do if he slept in his own room. They were right next to each other, but he could still be too far away to do anything if something happened.
Shaking his head, he went and grabbed a blanket, wrapping it around his shoulders as he settled down beside the blonde.
Saber recognized this landscape; she knew it so well that she wouldn’t be surprised if the memory of it was forever burned into her brain. The bloody hill, the corpses; the sword of promised victory, right at the very top of the blood soaked hill, the blade firmly buried in the grass and soil.
But something was wrong.
It was too cold. Frost clung to the blades of grass. The corpses were frozen solid; a soft winter wind drifted through the place. Her sword at the top of the hill seemed to radiate with an unholy warmth compared to the chill of the battlefield.
Watching her breath mist in front of her face, Saber shivered and rubbed her arms to try and generate some kind of body heat, instinctively heading towards the only source of warmth she saw. But even as she headed towards the warmth, she knew something was wrong there, too.
A dark, shadowed figure stood behind her sword. A clawed black hand gripped the hilt firmly. Lazy yellow eyes watched her approach before the creature smirked, extending its free hand.
“You’re cold, right?”
Saber felt a chill run down her spine, her bones freezing at the soft voice. Seductive, husky, soft; it was everything she knew her voice wasn’t.
So why did it sound like her?
“Come here, Saber.” And the smirk became a grin, yellow eyes gleaming. “I know a way to make you warm.”
Saber recoiled as if burned, stumbling back and crashing back down the hill to the very bottom. The chill around her increased and she shivered, but she curled up tightly and stayed firmly at the bottom of the hill as the creature chuckled.
She instinctively sought the warmth, but her instincts were also screaming at her. They told her to stay away, far away, from her sword, from that creature, from the warmth it offered.
That warmth would kill her the minute she accepted it. Of that, she had no doubt.
Her body felt sluggish and heavy, but she surfaced briefly from the black; the Servant known as Saber groaned softly as her eyes opened and adjusted to the darkness. Unseen by anyone, her green eyes cleared and sharpened slightly, containing traces of yellow that hadn’t been there before.
She knew where she was; in her room, back at Shirou’s house. Her aching muscles relaxed. She wasn’t in danger. She had survived the shadow, she had lived; she was safe, back in her home base. Hearing a soft snort and mumble, she blinked in confusion and tilted her head to the side; she felt no aura of danger, so that meant…
“Shirou?”
It was him. Her Master slumped against the wall across from her, his head bowed and his hands in his lap; he was asleep. A blanket was wrapped tightly around him to keep him warm, and beneath it she saw the clothes he always wore. The boy hadn’t even taken a moment to change.
Saber stared at him for a moment; her eyes softened, and she sighed. “Honestly,” she murmured softly so he wouldn’t wake, “you put up such a fuss when I want to stay by your side, and yet here you are by mine.” She shook her head and closed her eyes, still exhausted.
To herself, she admitted that it was honestly a sweet gesture. A small smile curved her lips before her weakened body once more claimed her mind, and she succumbed to the darkness a second time.
She didn’t stir until the late hours of morning.
Next part is the last, folks. I know I'm hinting at a lot, but... I can't really make this a full novel until I play through the whole route to see how Saber living would change things. I have to admit I'd like to expand on it, but right now I'm satisfied with this short fic.
Spoiler for Author's Notes:
1. I had a few debates about the Sakura section, and originally I was going to have a version where she never even had this part. But I do think that on some level Sakura likes Saber, even if she sees Saber as a threat to Shirou's safety. So I also think that if Saber had survived and Sakura knew she had successfully protected Shirou, she would have conflicted feelings. In my version she's still incredibly relieved that Saber is alive, but I do admit that it could easily go any other way. In this case her relief comes from the fact that Saber also protected Shirou.
2. More hints of exactly what the corruption Saber sustained has in store for her. The cold world described in the italics is sort of like Alter's own personal little world in Saber's mind, so accepting the sword means accepting the corruption and letting it consume her. That's to say, Saber isn't fully corrupted yet, but she definitely has the potential for it if the circumstances are right.
Location: Pennsylvania. It's sort of like a real state.
Age: 39
Very nice, as with the parts before it.
I liked the characterization of Sakura here; it made sense, and actually made her seem generally more sympathetic than her reaction to Saber's death in the actual game did. I guess the knowledge that Saber helped keep Shirou alive would do that.
Spoiler for Spoiler:
And the depiction of Saber's potential corruption was frankly rather chilling. Saber Alter in-game is borderline emotionless, so just the thought of her with a big, crazy slasher smile is... ::shudder::.
1. I had a few debates about the Sakura section, and originally I was going to have a version where she never even had this part. But I do think that on some level Sakura likes Saber, even if she sees Saber as a threat to Shirou's safety. So I also think that if Saber had survived and Sakura knew she had successfully protected Shirou, she would have conflicted feelings. In my version she's still incredibly relieved that Saber is alive, but I do admit that it could easily go any other way. In this case her relief comes from the fact that Saber also protected Shirou.
Well, I think you're right there. Sakura actually rather likes Saber, as a person. She just doesn't like the fact that Shirou has a servant, because she knows how dangerous the Grail War is, particularly with people like her sister (who she thinks is a cold magus who will do anything to win) involved. It's rather similar to Ilya's attitude to Sakura later on in HF. Ilya actually rather likes Sakura, as a person, but she is fully aware (from very early on) of the shadow's true identity and of the fact that Sakura is another Holy Grail. Because of that, she shuns Sakura and attempts to warn Shirou to stay away from her.
As for her feelings, she would indeed be somewhat conflicted. On one hand, Saber being alive means Shirou will still continue to fight. On the other hand, she did protect him, and Sakura would obviously feel grateful for that, and Sakura isn't really the sort of person to wish death on another. It's just that she's aware that Saber isn't 'really' a person in the same sense as she or Shirou is, she's a Heroic Spirit who was summoned with the explicit intent of fighting in the war and dying. But, if she sees her lying there like that, especially having been told that she protected Shirou, I doubt she'd end up feeling sad that she was still alive. Hell, even in the interlude she doesn't really think "I'm glad Saber is dead", she just thinks "I'm happy Sempai is safe".
What I'm not sure about is how you intend this to go from here (if you intend to do so at all). As I said before, Saber x Shirou simply can't work in the context of HF, unless you intend for Shirou to be miles OOC, because his feelings for Sakura are too strong, and if they're not then you get an inevitable bad end. I do wonder if you're aiming for a threesome, though, which is at least moderately plausible if Sakura comes to care for Saber. Which, really, needs to happen anyway if Saber is to remain after the war, since Shirou simply can't support her, whereas Sakura can (even without the extra prana supply from being a grail, Sakura can still support one servant, since Rin is shown to be capable of it in UBW).
I liked the characterization of Sakura here; it made sense, and actually made her seem generally more sympathetic than her reaction to Saber's death in the actual game did. I guess the knowledge that Saber helped keep Shirou alive would do that.
I'm glad it came across well, since I had a lot of debate on how to write the scene out. It's pretty obvious in-game that Sakura doesn't like Saber because of the fact that she puts Shirou in danger, but I couldn't see her reacting badly if she knew Saber was that way because she protected Shirou. It's just hard to really nail down the Sakura bits because I'm having way too much fun messing with Saber.
Quote:
Spoiler for Spoiler:
And the depiction of Saber's potential corruption was frankly rather chilling. Saber Alter in-game is borderline emotionless, so just the thought of her with a big, crazy slasher smile is... ::shudder::.
Spoiler for Alter:
And thus, one of the reasons I really wish I could develop this further. I know that in the game Alter is emotionless, but the thought of her being nested inside Saber and screwing around with her is a possibility I enjoy considering way too much. Plus, it's fun to play around with Saber being tempted into corruption. But yeah, if I had the chance to develop it, Alter would take sadistic pleasure in messing around with Saber.
EDIT: @CL
As I mentioned earlier, for the time being I have no plans of extending this beyond the next section, which is the morning after. I simply haven't played through HF enough to know how Saber living on would have impacted certain scenarios differently (though I'm far along in the game to see one scenario that could have possibly been changed, depending on how much I feel like playing with it). On top of that, staying true to HF would also mean having to play through the route numerous times in order to know the whole thing inside out, unless I get to a point where Saber surviving is so altering that I come up with things off the top of my head, which I doubt.
Beyond that, I have to admit that developing Sakura and Saber side by side for this story is a daunting task for me. Both of them are equally important in the plot with this change, Sakura having been important all along and Saber surviving when she should have died. I don't feel like I grasp Sakura's character well enough to develop her very well outside of what little bit the game has given me on her characterization, which to be honest isn't very much to work with in the first place.
Well, it's not entirely true that Sakura doesn't like Saber. Actually, when they get to know each other, they get on rather well. It's just that Sakura sees her as endangering Shirou, and thus wants her gone so that he won't fight any more.
Spoiler for HF:
As for Alter, well, I'd imagine it'd go somewhat like how Sakura's transformation goes, with the seed of Angra Mainyu inside her gradually acting to corrupt her until something bad happens that causes her to give in to the corruption.