Dating

[Haruka_Kitten]

Originally Posted by RadiantBeam

I don't know really how well this counts since she never outright confessed to me, but my girlfriend developed feelings for me and held them in for several months because she didn't know if I liked girls and at the time I identified as just straight. I'm amazed she was willing to wait so long for me to catch on.

Of course a few days is too short, but again it goes back to the fact that she probably had some guys on reserve if Haru didn't move fast enough for her liking; think of that what you will.

To be honest I didn't think she did either, but I was a little crushed. She said she felt like that too when I started dating my second girlfriend. That I find strange, she left me, and she got mildly pissed off because I started dating someone she knew? I honestly, until last weekend, thought me and her were through. Despite that, she still comes up and hugs me when I'm at the station waiting for my friend. He has yet to see the...umm...*points at last post*

[Kaijo]

Originally Posted by Harufox

To be honest I didn't think she did either, but I was a little crushed. She said she felt like that too when I started dating my second girlfriend. That I find strange, she left me, and she got mildly pissed off because I started dating someone she knew? I honestly, until last weekend, thought me and her were through. Despite that, she still comes up and hugs me when I'm at the station waiting for my friend. He has yet to see the...umm...*points at last post*

There is another possible explanation. People who break up with you, can still get jealous if you see other people. It's kind of a pride and ego thing, because deep down, they would prefer that you stay a bit "hurt" and single for a long time, while they find someone else.

This happens primarily with people who dump you because they found someone "better" and thus still have some feelings for you, and perhaps might use you as a backup if the new relationship doesn't work. Even "good" people can feel something like this, but with some thought, they can realize *why* they are feeling this way and deal with it.

It's up to you to decide how you feel, but my suggestion now is to put her out of your mind for now, and continue with life. If you find someone else, go for it, and don't concern yourself with her at all; She made her choice.

[Habhome]

Originally Posted by Harufox

I...am a moron...

I took far too long in deciding whether or not to go out with her that by the time I got my facts together, she'd already been swept up by someone else. As technically during that time we were not going out, and she gave me leeway to go my own way too, I think it's fair. I probably shouldn't have spent so long deciding.

Originally Posted by Animelover#1

Not to sound big headed, but... If she liked you she wouldn't go out with someone else.. especially if she already confessed to you.
It kind of gives me the impression she wasn't really into you in the first place.

This is a bit acted out, but I just wanted to throw my 2 cents in.

IMO the girl is in no way worth your trouble if she goes out with someone else so quickly just because you haven't decided. Then again, I'm as "mono" as it gets and would never consider fishing with several hooks on the line.
So yeah, I'm with Animelover#1 on this.

[cheyannew]

Originally Posted by Habhome

This is a bit acted out, but I just wanted to throw my 2 cents in.

IMO the girl is in no way worth your trouble if she goes out with someone else so quickly just because you haven't decided. Then again, I'm as "mono" as it gets and would never consider fishing with several hooks on the line.
So yeah, I'm with Animelover#1 on this.

Hey, I'm poly and think she was playing mind games

Generally if someone's interested it takes a lot longer than a week to decide to date someone else....

[yoropa]

Hey Harufox, don't feel too down about it. Something was wrong if she waited less than a week. That situation isn't right.

[RadiantBeam]

Originally Posted by yoropa

Hey Harufox, don't feel too down about it. Something was wrong if she waited less than a week. That situation isn't right.

As mentioned earlier, more than likely Haru wasn't her first choice; or if he was, she had some back-up boys if he took too long for her liking. Heh, since I went through a similar situation myself, I can kind of relate to what happened and how he feels, at least a little.

[whitepearl]

Originally Posted by Harufox

I...am a moron...

I took far too long in deciding whether or not to go out with her that by the time I got my facts together, she'd already been swept up by someone else. As technically during that time we were not going out, and she gave me leeway to go my own way too, I think it's fair. I probably shouldn't have spent so long deciding.

Don't feel too bad about this. It's happened to me many times in the past. It's a crummy feeling but stay strong. She isn't the only girl in the world—you'll be surprised that there are likely girls a lot better than her waiting for someone like you.

[Mr.Raw]

Aight, I completely agree with whitepearl

[SaintessHeart]

Originally Posted by whitepearl

Don't feel too bad about this. It's happened to me many times in the past. It's a crummy feeling but stay strong. She isn't the only girl in the world—you'll be surprised that there are likely girls a lot better than her waiting for someone like you.

You can't clone cute girls. They are one of a kind.

Though if it wasn't for those goddamn bureaucrats sanctioning genetic research and species splicing, I could have gotten my own catgirl to date and love.

[RadiantBeam]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

Though if it wasn't for those goddamn bureaucrats sanctioning genetic research and species splicing, I could have gotten my own catgirl to date and love.

Unless she met someone else and dumped you for them.

[SaintessHeart]

Originally Posted by RadiantBeam

Unless she met someone else and dumped you for them.

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo~..................... .don't tread on my dreams you tube of photons!

Back to the topic, I recently started working and had this female colleague 3 years younger than me. She has the exact same name as a Claymore and she is cute!

Until I feel so deflated when she said she is studying medicine.

[Kaijo]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo~..................... .don't tread on my dreams you tube of photons!

Back to the topic, I recently started working and had this female colleague 3 years younger than me. She has the exact same name as a Claymore and she is cute!

Until I feel so deflated when she said she is studying medicine.

Well, that gives you your pickup line then: "Hey, can I help with your studies sometime? We could, like, play doctor."

[bhl88]

... I think I heard that line somewhere...

[Kafriel]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo~..................... .don't tread on my dreams you tube of photons!

Back to the topic, I recently started working and had this female colleague 3 years younger than me. She has the exact same name as a Claymore and she is cute!

Until I feel so deflated when she said she is studying medicine.

I'd only feel deflated if she told me she's dating someone :P Bit too young for my tastes though...well, if you say she's cute, then I assume she's date-able!

[yoropa]

I don't think her field of study is a major factor in relationships. If anything, you guys would have something to talk about.

Something small, but enough to make me react, happened today. Basically, Korean girl called me "oppa" in an all happy and cutesy way. For those who don't know what that means, it essentially would be if a Japanese girl called you "oniisan."

Guuuhhh...

[synaesthetic]

On that "being a diamond" thing, don't get too weird. Too unique is not a good thing, and don't very transparently do things just to avoid conformity.

Just... be yourself. Remember it's the nice, stable guys the girls always eventually marry and have a bunch of kids with. Don't try to compete on the same level as the bad boys who just get casual sex and wind up in jail on drug charges.

[Shiemi]

Question: When my fiancé casually brings up something like: "Listened to this song on the radio. A girl dedicated it to her bf. It was really nice." Is he just bringing this casually or is he trying to tell me he would like me to do something special for him somehow? (Getting a little worried as his b-day approaches and after three years of gifts I'm a bit clueless.)

[RadiantBeam]

Originally Posted by Shiemi

Question: When my fiancé casually brings up something like: "Listened to this song on the radio. A girl dedicated it to her bf. It was really nice." Is he just bringing this casually or is he trying to tell me he would like me to do something special for him somehow? (Getting a little worried as his b-day approaches and after three years of gifts I'm a bit clueless.)

Sounds like he's just bringing it up casually, unless he does something specific when he's telling you this; like maybe he glances at you or looks pointedly in your direction when he says it, which could be a hint that he wants you to do something like that for him. But otherwise, I imagine he's just commenting on something he finds touching and wants your opinion on it.

[Kaijo]

Originally Posted by Shiemi

Question: When my fiancé casually brings up something like: "Listened to this song on the radio. A girl dedicated it to her bf. It was really nice." Is he just bringing this casually or is he trying to tell me he would like me to do something special for him somehow? (Getting a little worried as his b-day approaches and after three years of gifts I'm a bit clueless.)

Guys are usually more straightforward, and less about the subtle hints. But still, we can drop them. In this case, it's a tough call; you might kinda joke with him, and say something like "Oh, so are you telling me you'd like something like that, too?" in a teasing voice.

But if he seems to like it, and you want to do something nice for him, I'd say go for it. You don't *have* to, but you know he likes it, so it's an easy win for you. =)

[Tsuyoshi]

Originally Posted by Shiemi

Question: When my fiancé casually brings up something like: "Listened to this song on the radio. A girl dedicated it to her bf. It was really nice." Is he just bringing this casually or is he trying to tell me he would like me to do something special for him somehow? (Getting a little worried as his b-day approaches and after three years of gifts I'm a bit clueless.)

Like Kaijo said, guys tend to be more straightforward. They hardly ever give subtle hints. I think he's just saying that casually because he likes this song particularly for that reason. If anything, he might be hinting that he'll do something like that for you rather...but I'm not sure on that, considering I don't really know what he's like.

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo~..................... .don't tread on my dreams you tube of photons!

Back to the topic, I recently started working and had this female colleague 3 years younger than me. She has the exact same name as a Claymore and she is cute!

Until I feel so deflated when she said she is studying medicine.

I actually find ladies who study medicine attractive. It tells me that they're smart and they work hard because medicine isn't a joke degree. The fact that her name is the same as a Claymore is awesome too =D, but that aside, I'd suggest you get to know her better.

Originally Posted by Kaijo

Well, that gives you your pickup line then: "Hey, can I help with your studies sometime? We could, like, play doctor."

Lol Kaijo. Lol.