Dating

[Paranoid Android]

Originally Posted by Ledgem

Humans, in general, regardless of their gender, have no idea what they want. Part of the reason for that is because what they want is always changing, and because we all want what we don't or can't have.

Most people do know what they want, but yes, what they want always changes. But that doesn't mean they don't know what they want in the present.

As for our needs, the problem is we always want everything we already have with something more. Which is impossible. Something is always lost with every gain. We only think about the gain. And when we achieve it, we realized we have a hole somewhere else but can't make the connection. So then we want that hole to be fixed and we end up going back to where we began.

If a woman wants a man who's very caring and controlling (almost like a father, ewww lololol), they're losing their own privacy. And if they want their privacy, they're pulling the closeness further than they actually want it to be.

Similarly, if a man wants a woman who's attractive, that attractiveness will attract the man's attention and the unwanted attention of others.

Originally Posted by Ledgem

Do you know the expression "expect the worst, hope for the best"? The people on this forum are, by and large, "nerdy." I'm not necessarily talking about physical appearance - I'm talking about hobbies, social mannerisms, and so on. Society doesn't exactly place people in that category on a pedestal. The glum outlook may partly come from that stereotype that "nerds" aren't desirable and rarely get the girl.

How does that have anything do with what you just quoted? And that expression is an ideology for an optimistic but realistic attitude that people should have, which has nothing to do with what you said afterwards.

While you criticize some else for posting sexist garbage, you're posting derogatory stereotypical garbage yourself in the assumption that the majority of the people here are nerdy in something such as social mannerism. This is an anime themed forum for anime enthusiasts. It's an interest. One interest doesn't judge how our social life is as you claim as 'glum'.

And most hypocritical of all, you say nerds aren't desirable and rarely get the girl? What, nerds can't be girls? Especially the 'nerds' in this board?

[Ledgem]

Originally Posted by Paranoid Android

Most people do know what they want, but yes, what they want always changes. But that doesn't mean they don't know what they want in the present.

What I'm discussing goes deeper than that. You think you want something, but once you have it, it's not what you thought it would be. In other words, what you truly wanted was something else, but you didn't recognize it. Perhaps you still don't recognize it, and you need to go through acquiring more of what you think you want a few times before you begin to realize what your true desire is.

Not everyone has that problem, but from what I've seen and heard, it's quite common.

Originally Posted by Paranoid Android

As for our needs, the problem is we always want everything we already have with something more. Which is impossible. Something is always lost with every gain. We only think about the gain. And when we achieve it, we realized we have a hole somewhere else but can't make the connection. So then we want that hole to be fixed and we end up going back to where we began.

True and insightfully stated.

Originally Posted by Paranoid Android

How does that have anything do with what you just quoted? And that expression is an ideology for an optimistic but realistic attitude that people should have, which has nothing to do with what you said afterwards.

Saintess asked why people would try for something that they ultimately feel will fail. My points were two-fold: 1) that people may not truly be as pessimistic as they seem (hence the quote), and 2) the reason for pessimism may have to do with society's stereotypes.

Originally Posted by Paranoid Android

While you criticize some else for posting sexist garbage, you're posting derogatory stereotypical garbage yourself in the assumption that the majority of the people here are nerdy in something such as social mannerism. This is an anime themed forum for anime enthusiasts. It's an interest. One interest doesn't judge how our social life is as you claim as 'glum'.

And most hypocritical of all, you say nerds aren't desirable and rarely get the girl? What, nerds can't be girls? Especially the 'nerds' in this board?

Ah, it was rather callous of me to write what I did - I'm secure in being regarded as "nerdy" or awkward in various ways (who isn't?) but I should have figured that people would be insulted by that statement and probably kept it to myself. For the record, I did not say that the social life was "glum" but that people here have a "glum outlook" on their chances with girls as a result of society's stereotypes. I also did not say that nerds are not desirable - I find you all desirable enough to converse with, and have for many years - I was remarking on society's stereotypes.

What, do you disagree with me? Has society changed its tune? I'll admit that I've been cooped up in research labs and other places of academia for a few years, and I'm not the most up to date with these things. Are "nerds" now desirable, or has anime become such a mainstream hobby that you're not a "nerd" for engaging in it?

As to your last statement, I'm talking to a bunch of men at the moment, so I'm addressing males specifically. Of course nerds can be girls. I don't keep up with modern movies or television shows, but from what I can tell, "the nerdy girl" is now something that is being brought into them - how does society portray those types of girls? The last time I saw something relating to that, it was "nerdy girl undergoes transformation to become a popular girl." Have they changed that around so that the "nerdy girl" remains as she is, and is still desirable?

[Kafriel]

Why do you think there's so much conflict in the world, even though governments tend to be run by men? Because people - that term encompasses both genders - tend to run into conflicts. Or do you have a study proving that homosexual couples tend to fight less than heterosexual couples? If so, I'd be very interested to read it.

Gender and sex are two different things, or so I've learned here.

Yeah, because men really know what they want, right? I'll be blunt: what you've written is sexist garbage, and as I man I find it offensive. Humans, in general, regardless of their gender, have no idea what they want. Part of the reason for that is because what they want is always changing, and because we all want what we don't or can't have.

Well -I- want a relationship without conflict, that's who I am and it is final. Likewise, my male friends know exactly what they want, while women actively pursue something else, wary of stability even if it means constant changes at a certain pace. What you may find offensive is my life experience, I can't stress how true it is through the internet.

Has society changed its tune? I'll admit that I've been cooped up in research labs and other places of academia for a few years, and I'm not the most up to date with these things. Are "nerds" now desirable, or has anime become such a mainstream hobby that you're not a "nerd" for engaging in it?

How do you define a nerd in the first place? 24 hours is a very long time to spend, using up 1/8th of that time watching anime doesn't make people any less sociable, and even if a girl doesn't like or absolutely hates anime, she can still let her partner indulge in it without having to feel bad about it.

Have they changed that around so that the "nerdy girl" remains as she is, and is still desirable?

Sounds like a statement from a cheesy teen show...and is lacking as well; does the girl have to be desirable by men, or by women surrounding her as well?

[Ledgem]

Originally Posted by Kafriel

Gender and sex are two different things, or so I've learned here.

I think my point was clear.

Originally Posted by Kafriel

Well -I- want a relationship without conflict, that's who I am and it is final. Likewise, my male friends know exactly what they want, while women actively pursue something else, wary of stability even if it means constant changes at a certain pace. What you may find offensive is my life experience, I can't stress how true it is through the internet.

Broadly-defined desires? OK, I'll give you that. It's not quite what I had in mind when making my statements about knowing what you want, but it's valid enough. What I was thinking of dealt with specific desires. For example, you want a relationship without conflict, which is great - so what traits in a woman do you want, in the hopes that it will get you there? There is where things get tricky.

Originally Posted by Kafriel

How do you define a nerd in the first place? 24 hours is a very long time to spend, using up 1/8th of that time watching anime doesn't make people any less sociable, and even if a girl doesn't like or absolutely hates anime, she can still let her partner indulge in it without having to feel bad about it.

I'm not personally defining nerds, and I feel that this entire tangent about nerds is leading away from the blatant sexism that I called out. I'll explain a bit further regardless, because I'm getting the impression that people misunderstood what I was trying to say.

When I refer to "nerds" I'm referring to society's branding of nerds. Do you like computers and video games? Are you heavily into anime? Do you spend more time at home and/or on the internet than out with other people? I recognize that you're from another country, Kafriel, so perhaps some of these may be a bit off, but within America, if you match any one of these then you're considered anywhere from being "nerdy" to a full-out "nerd."

Psychologically speaking, it doesn't matter how socially adept you are, or how you look. Once you've been branded, that affects you. Some people are more affected than others, of course, and some people seem completely unfazed by labels at all (that's a rarity). That's what I'm getting at.

I'll apologize again to anyone who took offensive to my writings on nerds. None was intended. It's been a decade since I was in grade school (where labels like "nerd" carried a fair amount of weight), and over the past five years or so I've been in places where everyone would qualify as being a "nerd," and they were fine with it. Some even took pride in it. The label doesn't bother me, personally. I recognize that it affects society as a whole, but I've become used to have everyone around me be pretty non-caring about it - I suppose I was making the assumption that it was true for all of us here, but it was a mistake on my part to make that assumption.

Originally Posted by Kafriel

Sounds like a statement from a cheesy teen show...and is lacking as well; does the girl have to be desirable by men, or by women surrounding her as well?

To answer that, I suppose we'd have to do quite a bit of analysis and defining of terms. I don't have the answer to it, or any thoughts on that. My own interpretation of what I've seen thus far is that society has an image of what an ideal person should look and behave like. The most positive message that society has been able to send regarding "nerds" - from the media forms I've seen - has been either that "there's an ideal person inside of every nerd - they're just one makeover away" or "nerds are entertaining and they're not such bad people." I can't say that I agree with those messages (I'd prefer a message of "be happy with yourself, recognize that everyone has something to offer, and be respectful"), but then I feel that society's media forms generally glorify the shallow and superficial...

[Gamer_2k4]

Originally Posted by Ledgem

Sorry, but you're fulfilling some of your socialization needs by regularly talking to strangers on an internet forum. At the present time, this sort of activity falls outside of society's notion of "normal." Someone who drives 20 MPH above the speed limit might balk at being called a reckless driver, but their actions earn them that classification.

Regardless, you're correct in saying that it's a generalization, and I apologize if it offended you.

It didn't offend me one bit, because it doesn't apply to me. I just think it hurts your point when you're guilty of the thing you're accusing others of doing. Also, you continue to make assumptions even as you defend yourself. Take a look at my profile and see how frequently I post here. What? It's a single post a day? Not sure what world you live in where that qualifies as "regularly talking to strangers." Furthermore, the majority of my posts here are done at work, where I have downtime in my software job.

This forum is a place to alleviate boredom, not a surrogate social life, and I have difficulty believing I'm the only one here who feels that way.

Originally Posted by Ledgem

Why do you think there's so much conflict in the world, even though governments tend to be run by men? Because people - that term encompasses both genders - tend to run into conflicts. Or do you have a study proving that homosexual couples tend to fight less than heterosexual couples? If so, I'd be very interested to read it.

I don't have any studies, but I do have several gay friends, and they're SIGNIFICANTLY more laid back in their relationships than my straight friends.

People have conflicts on a global scale because of differences in ideologies. Men and women in relationships have conflicts on a personal scale because of differences in perspective. I'll disagree with someone in a different political party on, say, environmental issues, because I have a different set of core beliefs. I'll disagree with a girl about whether or not she should lie to "test my dedication" because we have different ways of assessing devotion.

Between "be clingy when I decide it's appropriate" and "don't be clingy," which seems more rational to you? How about "lying is okay when you're testing devotion" versus "lying is never okay"?

Originally Posted by Ledgem

What I was thinking of dealt with specific desires. For example, you want a relationship without conflict, which is great - so what traits in a woman do you want, in the hopes that it will get you there? There is where things get tricky.

I want a woman who's able to communicate openly about what she expects and how she's feeling.

See? That wasn't so tricky.

[Kafriel]

What I was thinking of dealt with specific desires. For example, you want a relationship without conflict, which is great - so what traits in a woman do you want, in the hopes that it will get you there? There is where things get tricky.

Just the fundamental stuff: being of at least average health, both physical and mental, not having obsessive-compulsive tendencies, and finally someone who can respect and understand my opinion on most subjects.

I'll apologize again to anyone who took offensive to my writings on nerds. None was intended.

None taken, I probably misunderstood based on the quote below.

Once you've been branded, that affects you.

I'll assume you're only talking about school and not society outside of it; otherwise, the cultural differences between us are greater than I had imagined.

I can't say that I agree with those messages

Every individual's opinion matters though, and to this day I haven't found anyone who would agree with any of these messages, or generalizations of any kind, for that matter - modern society is built on our beliefs, not those we were taught by others.

[Ledgem]

Originally Posted by Gamer_2k4

It didn't offend me one bit, because it doesn't apply to me. I just think it hurts your point when you're guilty of the thing you're accusing others of doing.

There's a huge difference between branding women with an insulting term (in this case, the offense was calling them irrational) and branding people with a term that isn't inherently good or bad. We're all guilty of making generalizations (see what I did just now?) but I feel that you're somehow trying to excuse sexist remarks by calling me a hypocrite. Am I a hypocrite? In this case, sure, you'd technically be right to call me one. Is there a difference between insulting women and grouping people on this forum under a certain term that society would use? Yes. Does technically being a hypocrite make that any less true or offensive? Nope.

Originally Posted by Gamer_2k4

Also, you continue to make assumptions even as you defend yourself. Take a look at my profile and see how frequently I post here. What? It's a single post a day? Not sure what world you live in where that qualifies as "regularly talking to strangers." Furthermore, the majority of my posts here are done at work, where I have downtime in my software job.

This forum is a place to alleviate boredom, not a surrogate social life, and I have difficulty believing I'm the only one here who feels that way.

Out of curiosity, why did you feel the need to write this paragraph? You're telling me that you didn't feel insulted, so why do you feel the need to defend and explain yourself? I'll tell you right now that I don't care whether you're a nerd or not, and as long as you're happy with your day-to-day life, I don't particularly about it, either. And once again, if you're offended by what I wrote (whether you want to admit to it or not), I apologize. It wasn't my intent.

Originally Posted by Gamer_2k4

I don't have any studies, but I do have several gay friends, and they're SIGNIFICANTLY more laid back in their relationships than my straight friends.

How many relationships are you thinking about? Even though I ask that, the number you have in mind probably isn't more than enough to be considered anything better than anecdotal. In other words, not good enough proof for a generalization.

Originally Posted by Gamer_2k4

Between "be clingy when I decide it's appropriate" and "don't be clingy," which seems more rational to you? How about "lying is okay when you're testing devotion" versus "lying is never okay"?

You're posing these loaded questions under the assumptions that all or most women engage in those sorts of behaviors, and that men do not. I think that's a flawed assumption. However, I also recognize that the only proof I have of calling that out is anecdotal, which is the same as yours; thus, we'll have to agree to disagree, but I would hope that you approach women with an open mind and recognize that many women do not engage in the irrational patterns of behavior that you're thinking of.

Originally Posted by Gamer_2k4

I want a woman who's able to communicate openly about what she expects and how she's feeling.

See? That wasn't so tricky.

That's still not what I was getting at, but as of now I can't think of a better way to describe it than I already have.

Originally Posted by Kafriel

I'll assume you're only talking about school and not society outside of it; otherwise, the cultural differences between us are greater than I had imagined.

I don't imagine that there are cultural differences, but I'm probably not being clear. It applies within society, as well. It deals with personal identity - how you perceive yourself, how you think that others perceive you, and how others actually perceive you. There are many things that go into that, and labels are a part of it (although the strength of their influence depends on the individual).

Originally Posted by Kafriel

Every individual's opinion matters though, and to this day I haven't found anyone who would agree with any of these messages, or generalizations of any kind, for that matter - modern society is built on our beliefs, not those we were taught by others.

That seems a bit circular, since our beliefs are either influenced by or verbatim learned from others.

[Gamer_2k4]

Originally Posted by Ledgem

Out of curiosity, why did you feel the need to write this paragraph? You're telling me that you didn't feel insulted, so why do you feel the need to defend and explain yourself?

Because I had made a statement ("this doesn't apply to me") and an implication ("I'm calling this stereotyping because it doesn't apply to others") and I was backing those up.

Originally Posted by Ledgem

How many relationships are you thinking about? Even though I ask that, the number you have in mind probably isn't more than enough to be considered anything better than anecdotal. In other words, not good enough proof for a generalization.

Two or three. Statistically, it's 100%. =P

Originally Posted by Ledgem

You're posing these loaded questions under the assumptions that all or most women engage in those sorts of behaviors, and that men do not. I think that's a flawed assumption. However, I also recognize that the only proof I have of calling that out is anecdotal, which is the same as yours; thus, we'll have to agree to disagree, but I would hope that you approach women with an open mind and recognize that many women do not engage in the irrational patterns of behavior that you're thinking of.

You're right that many women do not. However, the fact that multiple people had such an experience with a woman, while no one said, "Yeah, but my buddy/boyfriend/whatever did the same thing," combined with my other "irrational" experiences with women IRL, leads me to believe that the problem is more common in women than men.

[Dextro]

Originally Posted by Kafriel

I'll assume you're only talking about school and not society outside of it; otherwise, the cultural differences between us are greater than I had imagined.

If you believe you can't be "branded" outside of school life then you're in for some serious disappointment in life. Every social circle any one person gets involved in throughout his life will brand people one way or another, it's just that school life is such a common event that involves so many different kinds of people that it ends up being where such branding can take a larger toll on people.

[Ledgem]

Originally Posted by Gamer_2k4

Because I had made a statement ("this doesn't apply to me") and an implication ("I'm calling this stereotyping because it doesn't apply to others") and I was backing those up.

How does explaining yourself disprove anything about others?

I'll also go ahead and say that despite what you wrote, I'm not convinced. I think you're as nerdy as the rest of us, and I say that affectionately

Originally Posted by Gamer_2k4

Two or three. Statistically, it's 100%. =P

You already see it, I don't need to say anything

Originally Posted by Gamer_2k4

You're right that many women do not. However, the fact that multiple people had such an experience with a woman, while no one said, "Yeah, but my buddy/boyfriend/whatever did the same thing," combined with my other "irrational" experiences with women IRL, leads me to believe that the problem is more common in women than men.

There's so much I could say here, but today seems to be a rambling day for me... I don't think I could present my thoughts in a manner that links together easily.

I don't disagree that it's a stereotype that women tend to be less rational. The thing is, given that the stereotype exists, it seems likely that we (as members of society that stereotype women as irrational) would be quick to identify women as irrational, whereas a man exerting the same behavior would likely be labeled something else (like "dick," "idiot," and so on). For what ever reason - and this may be specific to me - I have a very easy time thinking up examples of "irrational woman," but "irrational man" doesn't bring as much to mind until I start digging. Yet if I think about it, there are quite a few examples of irrational men; probably enough to rival the number of "irrational woman" examples that I can think of. It's just that the term "irrational" tends to go toward women rather than men.

Not sure if I was clear - does that make sense? Basically what I'm trying to say is that it's an issue of perception. I suppose we can't prove or disprove generalizations off of it, but it's something to think about.

[Mystique]

Wow Ledgem, how you tempt me to join this, back to the lab with you! xD
I was also getting quite miffed at the last couple of pages noting that it was mainly male views on "dating" and the balance was sooo lopsided I figured 'to hell with it' until I saw Saintess' post and I had to flex my claws just a little.

Originally Posted by Gamer_2k4

Men are more straightforward than women; it's just their personality. Why do you think there's so much conflict in relationships between men and women? It's because each gender sees things differently. That's simply a fact of life, not sexism.

The way you expressed that wasn't very conductive.
Women don't know what they want.
Both know what they want, and while we do perceive life differently what causes conflict isn't the difference but the breakdown in communication or simply not having found a successful way to communicate that encompasses how the man and woman (or boy and girl for this forum) see the same situation from different angles.

When this fails, assumptions are made usually false ones which people based their decisions on and then Hell begins.

I'll read over the lovely debate later but this is an anime forum on the net with a demograpth of as Ledgem metioned, young largely male anime or Japanese culture enthusiasts.
As with most things, you gotta take it with a pinch of salt, while advice here is sincere most times, you make the decision offline to the best of your ability, based on factors what most of us can't see from behind a computer screen.

[HasuMasu]

Well this is getting a bit out of hand, now before you start mauling each-other I'd like to remind you that stereotypes are the product of hundreds of years of life experience collectively gathered by the human race, yes, some of them can be bullshit, but still not entirely discredited, now, a label is a label but you can choose to ignore it or be affected by it, neither of which is inherently wrong, the decision is based mostly on how you see our society as a whole, if you think it's not too bad then you might give a bit more credit to the way it labels things, on the other hand if you think it's bullshit then you probably won't give two shits about how it sees you as a person.

Now, how does this relate to dating? Well, men and women are different, this difference exists independent of society's labels, but they do attract labels and stereotypes regardless exactly because of this inescapable difference, if you are able to look past these differences then you're probably a Newtype but you don't have to, you simply need the willingness to accept and respect these differences and maybe we can all just get along fine, and if you're interested enough in eachother for that, then maybe you should be dating, see what I did there?


Maybe this all just sounds like me talking to myself, but the topic of debate was pretty damn interesting, though slightly diverging from the subject of the thread, granted I feel that the whole argument was probably over before I made this post anyway.

[Kafriel]

Originally Posted by Dextro

If you believe you can't be "branded" outside of school life then you're in for some serious disappointment in life. Every social circle any one person gets involved in throughout his life will brand people one way or another, it's just that school life is such a common event that involves so many different kinds of people that it ends up being where such branding can take a larger toll on people.

I am already part of many social circles, all with different kinds of people...and yet we don't stick labels on each other, regardless of behaviour. To give some examples, I know many people with dyslexia, but that didn't stop them from assisting me in tutoring the rest of my class last semester. When I went to the casino the other day, most of my friends followed a more formal dressing code than me, but that doesn't make me anything but a member of the group.
The only time I was given a nickname was during my time in the army, simply because we were 40 people in one room, and that was only till we got to learn each other's names. When people can understand each other, I believe that they can see others for what they are, not just what they seem to be.
To get back to dating, it's an act of communication and an attempt to understand another person, get to know someone better, so I don't think anyone would split after one date because of an unfortunate event that could make someone look bad or different in some way.

[Mystique]

Aaaaw reading the above debate takes me back to the "good ol days".
It also reminded me of what I like to call:

"The Stereotype Act"
That's when someone who is either new to Asuki or to the GC forums gets into a debate and snipes a poster for not stating the bloody obvious and calls foul on it based on generalisation.

A: So yeah the demography on Animesuki seems to be made up of male nerds who're into a subculture of Japan...
B: What?! how dare you!? We aren't all nerds here. some of us aren't even into moe contests, use Japanese otaku lingo such as Tsundere and have life sized pillows!
And also nerds aren't all men, there are females too!
Also, whose to say that we can't get girls!? We can get girls too!
And besides, who the hell can define what a nerd is in normal society?!
Speaking of which, what is "normal"?!
Please stop wasting your time polluting us with your narrow mind bound by the limitations of stereotypes!

Reminded me that short of writing a disclaimer stating the bloody obvious (I'm aware this does not apply for everyone, etc), somedays you're setting yourself up for a world of pain.
(Or fun)

<Mystie Disclaimer for the newbies> And yes, I did (and do) deliberately use stereotypes for the sake of taking the piss and a little fun. It has its place in a debate as long as we’re all intelligent to know (and I’m sure we are) that it’s not the be all and end all in Life.
There are always exceptions.</disclamier>

Woman: I love chocolate but it makes me break out in spots ><;;
Man: Then try eating less or avoid chocolate all together. (Totally rational, males are probably thinking)
Woman: WTF?! Are you calling me a fat, ugly cow!!?

(He actually meant to say was: )
"Try eating some every few days to see if that'll help lessen the outbreak. If you find a good balance, you can enjoy choccie and your skin should be okay, too!"
This would be a female answer, don't ask me how or why we know to answer like this, we just do
So try to learn a little here, boys

Originally Posted by Gamer_2k4

This forum is a place to alleviate boredom, not a surrogate social life, and I have difficulty believing I'm the only one here who feels that way.

Perhaps others share your view but you'd be surprised especially in this GC section how much one can learn, sharpen their writing skills and broaden their views and knowledge through the interaction of other members from all walks of life via here.
Boredom has very little to do with it when we write fiction, ask for translation help, look up Japanese culture, share pictures and advice or keep up with the latest current events around the world

I want a woman who's able to communicate openly about what she expects and how she's feeling.

See? That wasn't so tricky.

The thing is us women do say what we want or how we feel.
Just more times than not, the guy just doesn't catch on, especially when it comes to sensitive topics.

To put it in a reeeeeally super summarised manner:
Men: Words
Women: Words and body language and sometimes intuitive sensing.

Instead of "I want a woman who's able to communicate openly" how about:

"I want to learn and gain skills to be able to understand and communicate with women well, especially when it comes to my own future partner"

[SaintessHeart]

Originally Posted by Ledgem

Do you know the expression "expect the worst, hope for the best"? The people on this forum are, by and large, "nerdy." I'm not necessarily talking about physical appearance - I'm talking about hobbies, social mannerisms, and so on. Society doesn't exactly place people in that category on a pedestal. The glum outlook may partly come from that stereotype that "nerds" aren't desirable and rarely get the girl.

HAHAHAHAHAHA oh God... you're joking, right? Please, say yes? Are you really trying to say that you're more rational for having chosen fantasy relationships than those of us who pursued the real thing? I'm not judging your choice, but I'm very close to wanting to fight with you over that thought.

I am being goofy! Read my reply to Ascaloth and you can see that I am just messing around and being 9.

[Mystique]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

I am being goofy! Read my reply to Ascaloth and you can see that I am just messing around and being 9.

Somedays Saintess with the years you've been here and the way you do go on and on about 2D > 3D females after all this time, it does make me wonder...

Eitherway get a few scars and grow a rugged beard and when you come outta the army, I'm sure you'll be having females swoon and bow to your feet

[DonQuigleone]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

I am being goofy! Read my reply to Ascaloth and you can see that I am just messing around and being 9.

I assumed so myself. I've often done the same thing. Given the fandom we're in, well, the fact he thought you were serious isn't suprising.

I don't think there's many of the 2D>3D crowd outside Japan, to be honest. And even they're a subculture of a subculture there. I'd say the Anime that feature those types are as much subtly mocking them as sympathising.

[SaintessHeart]

Originally Posted by Mystique

Somedays Saintess with the years you've been here and the way you do go on and on about 2D > 3D females after all this time, it does make me wonder...

Eitherway get a few scars and grow a rugged beard and when you come outta the army, I'm sure you'll be having females swoon and bow to your feet

Scars? I have one on my right hand - got burned while cleaning a still-hot heavy machine gun. It is my male pride of pure willpower.....and stupidity.

And I am already out. And I don't think I want to have a female on me - at least not my local type. As a good friend of mine would put it in the general context of local girls, "Only know how to do nails but not a meal".

I wouldn't want a girl who can't cook or clean - they have a tendency to be rather self-centered, bitchy (not the complaining type who attempts but fails to achieve something, but rather, someone who doesn't look for alternative solutions or even do anything about a problem at all) and too gossipy; they make lousy, myopic companions and always want us guys to give in to them.

Getting laid by them is another issue though.

Actually I am more focused on my career now. My waifus will do fine for now......RL girls can wait till I earn a 5-digit income per month.

[DonQuigleone]

Not so fussed on the cleaning thing (wouldn't want to go out with a girl who's a neat freak), but cooking, a girl who can cook well is damn fine in my books .

It's not that I dislike cooking, but I don't derive great enjoyment from it, I'm more of a sous chef then a chef. I can do most of the basic tasks cooking requires, I'm just not great at assembling dishes.

However, it would be fairly important that any girl I go out with have interests beyond that, an appreciation for politics and international affairs, and intellectual activities, for starters. She'd have to be on "my level" so to speak. I expect as much as I am capable of when it comes to housekeeping, which isn't terribly high, but not low either.

[Tsuyoshi]

Originally Posted by SaintessHeart

I wouldn't want a girl who can't cook or clean - they have a tendency to be rather self-centered, bitchy (not the complaining type who attempts but fails to achieve something, but rather, someone who doesn't look for alternative solutions or even do anything about a problem at all) and too gossipy; they make lousy, myopic companions and always want us guys to give in to them.

Getting laid by them is another issue though.

Actually I am more focused on my career now. My waifus will do fine for now......RL girls can wait till I earn a 5-digit income per month.

That may not always be the case. I wouldn't prejudice a girl who can't cook or clean as someone who is bitchy. If I know someone who can't do either of those things, I never automatically think that's how they are. I'll find that out later as I talk to her. But I do agree that girls who don't bother finding a solution to a problem, gossip too much and so on are a bore. Tho I wish you luck with finding someone not like that. Girls like so are becoming more and more frequent