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Old 2008-06-01, 07:45   Link #5861
Saint X
VxR Productions
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Megaton Post!!!

As per FFT Advice, i hereby release this Trial "bomb" of a snippet...

Spoiler for AlternateS II Prologue 1: The End of a Journey… The Start of a Mission:


Well simple comments are Welcome...

If i find the will, i can probably finish all my Nanoverse works

*warps out*
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Old 2008-06-01, 09:19   Link #5862
Keroko
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dusk_ View Post
And now I'm actually considering writing a full length fic...which is rather bad, considering I have midterms this week .

Though, I'm not quite sure who would be Shinji, Nanoha has a severe lack of psychotic wusses...Arisa?
*snrk* Arisa a wuss? I think you mean Suzuka, being the soft-spoken person she is, she comes a bit closer.
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Old 2008-06-01, 10:09   Link #5863
Tk3997
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Saint X View Post
As per FFT Advice, i hereby release this Trial "bomb" of a snippet...

Spoiler for AlternateS II Prologue 1: The End of a Journey… The Start of a Mission:


Well simple comments are Welcome...

If i find the will, i can probably finish all my Nanoverse works

*warps out*
I have… issues with the idea of a random OC becoming Director of the TSAB least of all one that apparently largely operated in secret and whose activates are shady. Frankly that sort of person would be so far down the list of people to be placed in charge it’s not even funny… Such a post is a political one more then anything and such a figure is not the sort of person the political machine would put in it if for no other reason then there own self interest. For this to seem even vaguely credible it’s going to take some seriously in depth and lengthy explaining.

Having an established character becoming head of a government or military isn’t something you can just wrap up with a couple paragraphs… Well okay you could, but no one is going to buy into it. This is the sort of thing that needs to be sold to a reader and sold well for them to buy it and runs a great risk of being seen as contrived and sue’ish if done poorly.

Unless none of that set up pans out in which case none of this matters.

That aside the rest of it was rather to spastic or more kindly too unclear at this time to say much about plot wise. That said though the descriptive aspects could use work most of it was rather sparse and allot of time people just seemed to be talking with minimal attention or detail about what was going on around them. There were also places were it was hard to keep track of who exactly was talking and how they were speaking. The entire thing also just seemed rushed in general like you were trying to cover way too much material with way to little text. Was interesting, but could have used some editing and a bit more time IMO.
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Old 2008-06-01, 10:52   Link #5864
Kha
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This Khrack was created by Ilya's Nanoha/Lyrical Night Crack.

Reposting for the convenience of the Filians:
Spoiler for Saber:
Btw, this is the original Kha der Kleriker plot-progressed to completion, had I never stepped into Outer Cadia. You can judge for yourself how different the Kha now is from this Kha.
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Old 2008-06-01, 11:40   Link #5865
Thesinwithin
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so hey guys. I was browsing Nanoha's ff section on ff.net and I discovered this little gem of a story that is sadly neglected when it comes to feed back.

I think that the poor author deserves some, and that we're the best people to give it to him/her.

Through Troubled Waters

What do you say?
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Old 2008-06-01, 12:15   Link #5866
NorthernFallout
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thesinwithin View Post
so hey guys. I was browsing Nanoha's ff section on ff.net and I discovered this little gem of a story that is sadly neglected when it comes to feed back.

I think that the poor author deserves some, and that we're the best people to give it to him/her.

Through Troubled Waters

What do you say?
I don't really know what to say other than, that it was really good. The author manage to capture the personality of the main character and the others very well and I think that is what made this so good.

Edit: I missed the 2 other chapters ;_;. Read them later
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Last edited by NorthernFallout; 2008-06-01 at 12:35.
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Old 2008-06-01, 12:27   Link #5867
Evil Rick
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: In the Netherrealm, thinking who to betray next...
Guys, I don't want to get in troubles but there is alredy a thread for OC characters, It's just a sugestion but better meke their profiles there and link it here, just to stay on topic`^.^!
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Old 2008-06-01, 12:32   Link #5868
Advent000
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thesinwithin View Post
so hey guys. I was browsing Nanoha's ff section on ff.net and I discovered this little gem of a story that is sadly neglected when it comes to feed back.

I think that the poor author deserves some, and that we're the best people to give it to him/her.

Through Troubled Waters

What do you say?
I agree, I've read the first 2 chapters and I'le put a reveiw once I've read the third.
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Old 2008-06-01, 13:41   Link #5869
Black_Wolf
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Join Date: May 2008
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thesinwithin View Post
so hey guys. I was browsing Nanoha's ff section on ff.net and I discovered this little gem of a story that is sadly neglected when it comes to feed back.

I think that the poor author deserves some, and that we're the best people to give it to him/her.

Through Troubled Waters

What do you say?
That is the best piece of fan fiction i've read in a long time. Very descriptive at setting the scene and the atmosphere before any scene takes place. Well structured well laid out, a lot of content each chapter. Characters captured really well, no single character so far has really been left out, each one has been integral to the story and has had some focus on their part in its development, or some enlightenment to their own character and what they are thinking.

The plot is believable, its not being rushed, its well planned, great ending to chapter three that really leaves me wanting to read the next part of the story.

If you have not read this story, READ NOW!!!
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Old 2008-06-01, 13:49   Link #5870
Thesinwithin
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re: my rec,
make sure to review on fanfiction.net and not here, just because I don't know if the author is on here.
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Old 2008-06-01, 13:55   Link #5871
Akuma-sama
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Join Date: Dec 2005
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thesinwithin View Post
re: my rec,
make sure to review on fanfiction.net and not here, just because I don't know if the author is on here.
Actually, I am here, I just haven't logged on in some time (as my sig probably shows...). I'm mostly on TFF nowadays.

Thanks for the kind comments, chapter 3 is well underway, probably 70% finished. Bit of a warning though, I'm slow.
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Author of My∞HiME and MGLN: Through Troubled Waters, read and drop a review please
Currently watching: Kurenai, Zettai Karen Children, Kyouran Kazoku Nikki, Shion no Ou
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Old 2008-06-01, 14:00   Link #5872
Thesinwithin
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Akuma-sama View Post
Actually, I am here, I just haven't logged on in some time (as my sig probably shows...).

Thanks for the kind comments, chapter 3 is well underway, probably 70% finished. Bit of a warning though, I'm slow.
oh. HI!

Welcome to our craziness.

You've got a really awesome fic going here, you should continue it at your own pace, no one's going to rush you.

Edit: O! your location says that you're near me. -waves at northern neighbor-
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Old 2008-06-01, 14:34   Link #5873
Satashi
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Have a Vampire!Fate: Creation teaser

As he walked to the far wall, Fate watched him pick up a training whip for the horses. The tightly bound leather braided rope fell to the ground when he gripped the handle. “A perfect way to teach restraint and focus,” he mused to himself while eying his adopted daughter/apprentice. “This will be your first of many, Fate.” to show her what it could do, he flicked his wrist to snap the whip so loudly that the horses around them whined in their stalls.
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Old 2008-06-01, 14:47   Link #5874
TheShinySword
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Out of the archives emerges a dust covered wolf. The wolf shakes itself off before transforming into a human and holding aloft a thick pile of paper.
"I have done it!" The wolf-person exclaims. "Hours of work in the archives but it has been finished."
"Only a few pages shy of 300 pages I present to the great people of Fila Fantasia ..."



The Shorts Archive
They're like longs fanfics but short
These are the shorts that haven't been archived or released anywhere but right here on the FanFic thread.

Spoiler for Alouscrie:


Spoiler for Dusk_:

Spoiler for Ellenoir:




Spoiler for Fuyu no Sora:


Spoiler for Gilraen Isilra:

Spoiler for Illidan182:

Spoiler for JunkedCat:

Spoiler for Momo Chan:


Spoiler for Kagerou:

Spoiler for Kasu1127:


Spoiler for Krisslanza:

Spoiler for Mae:


Spoiler for Panther_Munchy:

Spoiler for SaintX:

Spoiler for Satashi:


Spoiler for TeleIce:


Spoiler for USB500:

Spoiler for Wanwan1203:


If I've missed anything or made a mistake please PM me and I'll right it right away

Last edited by TheShinySword; 2009-05-14 at 19:48.
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Old 2008-06-01, 14:48   Link #5875
TheShinySword
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The wolf then grins mischievously and picks up another stack of paper. "Of course there's this archive too.
"Do you dare investigate it?"



The Crack Archive
The Crack is Strong in these ones

What is crack you might be asking? Well according to our board's wiki Crack is:
"A form of fan fiction in which characters are put in very random, nonsensical situations, and most often are all OOC. Its name, derived from the drugs, uses the irrationality from the drug high as an example of what to expect in the piece. Generally these are humor pieces. Also occasionally known as a sugarfic, probably from the common assertion in author's notes that the story was written on a "sugar high", or the stereotype of such."
But the truth is you probably shouldn't think about it much.
The purpose of this Archive is to be a comprehensive guide to our massive amount of crack and what they're based on.

Now come on in don't be shy the Crack won't hurt. Much.

Garden Variety Crack



Spoiler for Enraptured:

Spoiler for ghazghkull:

Spoiler for Illidan182:

Spoiler for Junked Cat:


Spoiler for Kagerou:

Spoiler for Kai the Reaper:

Spoiler for Mercurianangel:

Spoiler for Naolin:


Spoiler for Thesinwithin:


Spoiler for USB500:




Spoiler for Specials:

Special Crack
Spoiler for Shiny Crack:



Spoiler for Board Crack:

Spoiler for Khrack:


And sorry for the double post

Last edited by TheShinySword; 2008-06-04 at 16:04.
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Old 2008-06-01, 14:53   Link #5876
NorthernFallout
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^ What can I say other than good job and holy **** that would have taken time
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Old 2008-06-01, 14:58   Link #5877
Junkedcat
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Warning: The following chapter "Sister" contains content that may be disturbing to some readers.
Spoiler for L!F Ch 9:
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Old 2008-06-01, 14:58   Link #5878
Black_Wolf
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Join Date: May 2008
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Holy ****



That is one Mega Archive!! I must read it ALL!!! now to start with the crack or the real, crack or the real. Gotta be the Shiny Crack!!!


Ps, i made a FF.net account with some of my stuff on, not all but not sure if i will continue with it yet depending on the response i get the id's Black-Wolf-Ninja, in case anyones interested.
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Old 2008-06-01, 15:03   Link #5879
Junkedcat
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Spoiler for L!F Ch 10:
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Old 2008-06-01, 15:19   Link #5880
Dusk_
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Keroko View Post
*snrk* Arisa a wuss? I think you mean Suzuka, being the soft-spoken person she is, she comes a bit closer.
No, I did mean Arisa. Aside from the wussy part Arisa would make a pretty good selfish jerk...given a few tweakings.
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