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Old 2013-08-17, 19:25   Link #61
winhlp32
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Join Date: Apr 2010
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Great concept here. All the lights are really gorgeous, and you are getting better with skin shading. The water drips this time also improved and doesn't remind me of soap or sunscreen or those things. I can see how hard you worked with the details this time, with the design of those guns, the hair, etc.

I thought you maybe missed an opportunity there to add shadows and reflections of Mami and the guns in the water. Some sparkles in the water would be nice too. I think that would've really bring out the whole "sunrise/sunset at the sea" atmosphere.

Overall you did great. Look at some more Makoto Shinkai skies and keep at it! And nice legs.
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Old 2013-08-17, 20:04   Link #62
Seitsuki
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I agree, where are Mami's mammies?

Your water effects have stepped up a ton! Nice work.
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Old 2013-08-17, 20:10   Link #63
Triple_R
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Assort Dis View Post
For this one, I sort of getting inspiration from Madoka - The different story. A pretty good read, especially when it shows more insights into Mami's character.

Mami's hairstyle is surprisingly difficult to draw
The Great:

1. Extremely on-model and solid-looking muskets.

2. Very lovely background.

3. Nice, calm water.

4. Mami's outstretched hand. Very elegant.

5. Mami's legs.


The Good:

1. Mami's hair. You didn't nail this perfectly, but you came very close. Given that her hair is hard to draw, that's really good for a first attempt.

2. Bathing suit style and color. It suits her.

3. Water droplets on body. Again, not perfect, but decent work.

4. Hair ornament. I think this should be shining more than what it is. You nailed the basic design, but it lacks the glow it really ought to have.

5. Anatomy in general. Great in some areas, weak in others, and solid everywhere else. Averages out to "Good".


The Weak:

1. Mami's breasts. Definitely the weakest area of the entire work. These are way too small. Looking over your full body of work, this is something that I think you'd benefit from practicing on - Larger female breasts. Mami's breasts look like they belong on Madoka. To be fair, a lot of artists overdo big breasts even on big breasted anime girls, and that extreme isn't good either. But if you're going to draw someone like Mami Tomoe, you might as well have at least some fun with the melonpan, don't you think?

2. Mami's eyes. I completely agree with Ryonea here.

3. Crying but smiling. Odd combination given this very relaxing and soothing scene. It wouldn't be so bad if I could tell why she's crying. But I can't. Unless it has something to do with that red Soul Gem she's holding. ... Is the idea that Mami is mourning over Kyouko, or something? If so, there's probably better ways to convey that.


On the whole, it's a very good pic.

My suggestions for your artwork going forward:

1. Don't be afraid to draw large breasts. If the character is known for it, then go for it!

2. If you're aiming for some sort of emotional theme with the picture, I'd suggest going for something a little less subtle, honestly.

3. When you twist things - be it ribbons or hair - I notice you have them getting cut off entirely. It makes the twisty thing look kind of floppy and weak. Try to give the twisty thing a bit more fullness, and don't just have it flatline during mid-twirl.
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Old 2013-08-19, 03:30   Link #64
Assort Dis
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About Mami's breasts... yes, I think I have a problem with drawing big breast characters considering I've never drawn any girl with a bigger chest size than B cup . I seriously need to fix this.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ryonea View Post
If there are some things I could point out, it'd be Mami's eyes (is she crying?). I believe her eye curve is slanted outward instead of inward, as she has the "sleepy" expression all the time. The skirt ruffles are also should be centered from her hips, and the most important one is.... I believe her chest size should be at least 3 times of that

Overall, I think now it's my turn to ask for some tips from you!
Yes, she's crying . I also seem to have a problem with eye curve. I tend to draw their eyes with the same curves. Noted the skirt.
Well... feel free to ask anything but I can't guarantee my answer will satisfy you
Thank you for your comment as always.

Quote:
Originally Posted by winhlp32 View Post

I thought you maybe missed an opportunity there to add shadows and reflections of Mami and the guns in the water. Some sparkles in the water would be nice too. I think that would've really bring out the whole "sunrise/sunset at the sea" atmosphere.

Overall you did great. Look at some more Makoto Shinkai skies and keep at it! And nice legs.
Adding their shadows is a really great idea . I don't know how exactly can I make the shadow twist in the water but I'll try this next time. Makoto Shinkai... let's see if I can draw the sky as good as he did (it'd be a very long time before I can reach that level )
Thanks for your advice

Quote:
Originally Posted by Seitsuki View Post
I agree, where are Mami's mammies?

Your water effects have stepped up a ton! Nice work.
Thank you very much and sorry about the breast, I need to improve that

Quote:
Originally Posted by Triple_R View Post

skip
When it comes to big breasts, I don't seem to ever make it right. Definitely a big weakness. Will try to experiment around more

The idea I was aiming to here is Mami remembering her happy days with Kyoko while recalling what happened in their relationship. Well... now that I put it into words, this idea seem quite hard to pull off

Thanks for pointing out what's wrong with the twisty thing. I didn't know why they always look stiff . And thank you for your suggestions, I needed that
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Old 2013-09-06, 10:14   Link #65
Assort Dis
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Not drawing anything for just a few weeks and it feels like I can't draw as well as before (not like it was good to begin with )

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Old 2013-09-07, 03:51   Link #66
winhlp32
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I dare say you are on to something here. You still need some work with shadow placement and general dexterity with your brush strokes (try playing around with the minimum size of your brush strokes on SAI?), but your color choices this time is spot on. In your previous Madoka Magica drawings I always thought you used overly saturated colors, but this time the saturation is just right.

And I really like that like Ryonea, for your hair you have that Studio-8 style look(soft glow-ring around the hair, and the white-line-highlights). The drawing of the hair has improved a bit as well. It looks bouncy on the tips which is a sign you are paying attention to giving weight to the hair. Try to make her sidetail look more like her fluttering hair on her right side.

As for anatomy, I'd say her left leg the calf is bent in an unnatural way. It may have looked more natural if you had her feet pointing straight down instead of having it to the side.

The eyes in general is just well done. Also I really like how you mirrored her in the water. Overall, I'd say you've made some good progess especially on the coloring side. And I'd love to see you draw more often. Keep it up!
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Old 2013-09-07, 06:39   Link #67
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I really have to hand it to you, Assort Dis - You draw the best legs.

I love how curvaceous your Miyu is here. She just feels so bouncy and vibrant, which is fitting given the pose you have her in.

And yeah, the coloration you have here is just perfect.

I also agree with winhlp32 on Miyu's eyes - They're very well done.

I also have to say that you're improving on breasts. You're giving them a bit more space and volume. And since Miyu doesn't have large breasts anyway, they definitely aren't too small in this picture.

Honestly, I have no major criticisms to make here. The hair strikes me as maybe a bit too fine, and her hair accessories perhaps don't stand out enough. That's it though.

Excellent work!
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Old 2013-09-07, 11:06   Link #68
Assort Dis
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Quote:
Originally Posted by winhlp32 View Post
I dare say you are on to something here. You still need some work with shadow placement and general dexterity with your brush strokes (try playing around with the minimum size of your brush strokes on SAI?), but your color choices this time is spot on. In your previous Madoka Magica drawings I always thought you used overly saturated colors, but this time the saturation is just right.

And I really like that like Ryonea, for your hair you have that Studio-8 style look(soft glow-ring around the hair, and the white-line-highlights). The drawing of the hair has improved a bit as well. It looks bouncy on the tips which is a sign you are paying attention to giving weight to the hair. Try to make her sidetail look more like her fluttering hair on her right side.

As for anatomy, I'd say her left leg the calf is bent in an unnatural way. It may have looked more natural if you had her feet pointing straight down instead of having it to the side.

The eyes in general is just well done. Also I really like how you mirrored her in the water. Overall, I'd say you've made some good progess especially on the coloring side. And I'd love to see you draw more often. Keep it up!
Thanks as always. You give great critics every single time

I must admit I still can't grasp shadow placement well, the more I look at anime pics the more I got confused. The same with color mixing
I'll try to play around more with that minimum size brush. I actually have been using only ink pen for shading.

I'll be careful with feet next time I draw another full body pic.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Triple_R View Post
I really have to hand it to you, Assort Dis - You draw the best legs.

I love how curvaceous your Miyu is here. She just feels so bouncy and vibrant, which is fitting given the pose you have her in.

And yeah, the coloration you have here is just perfect.

I also agree with winhlp32 on Miyu's eyes - They're very well done.

I also have to say that you're improving on breasts. You're giving them a bit more space and volume. And since Miyu doesn't have large breasts anyway, they definitely aren't too small in this picture.

Honestly, I have no major criticisms to make here. The hair strikes me as maybe a bit too fine, and her hair accessories perhaps don't stand out enough. That's it though.

Excellent work!
Thanks again

I guess I did put too much effort into the leg . Glad you like it.

The hair does feel a bit too sharp, I'm still wondering why. And the breasts... what happened with Mami's breasts still haunts me so yeah... I wasn't careful this time.
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Old 2013-09-12, 07:54   Link #69
Ryonea
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Looks like you're the type who needs to warm up his engine regularly. I hope my habit of "occasional drawings" isn't rubbing off on you lol

I agree with most of winhlp32's points, especially about the shadow placement. Like I mentioned long time ago, firstly you should decide where the light source is from. The placement depends on that. After that, imagine your picture in a 3D plane... this is must be trained for sure. While I'm also not that good in placing shadows, I always felt something odd within my picture if I did something wrong, and most of them originated from the coloring / shadows.

As for general anatomy.. I think there are numerous off-angle positions. The most prominent ones are her face, and both of her shoes. The center area of both her shoes aren't inline with her legs. Both are a bit too much to the left side. For her face, since the head is on 3/4 front view, either her face area should be "rotated" to the right side (from her view) a bit or it's the back of her head that is rotated (I hope you understand what I mean despite this complicated explanation ). The point is that either her face or the back of her head shouldn't be showing that much area from this angle.

The left knee is also not very in-line with the overall IMO. If you follow the line from her front part of thigh to the knee, you can see that the knee should be going down more instead of left (from our view). And I also think that the knee shouldn't be that pointy when bent like that, they're more square instead.

btw. what do you mean with the "sharp" feel of the hair?

An interesting note is that I don't watch Prisma Illya since I never like Fate series. But I always had my eye on Miyu especially because of her design and the anime is being done by Silver Link studio... so its artstyle is more akin to my liking. Never saw her mahou shoujo outfit until I saw this drawing of yours. Looks like I need to watch the series too!

If you don't have much time to draw, I think it's okay to just draw some rough unfinished sketches just for keeping your hand trained so you don't lose the feel of your drawing.
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Old 2013-09-13, 21:52   Link #70
Assort Dis
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ryonea View Post
Looks like you're the type who needs to warm up his engine regularly.
Considering I'm pretty lazy myself and can hardly draw anything if I'm not in the mood, I'd say quality consistency is another problem I have


I see, I should pay more attention to body angle as well. By "sharp" I mean some parts of the hair looks like they are piercing instead of flowing smoothly, particularly her left side tail. I'll try drawing more sketches

And I don't think you need to know about Fate series in order to watch this one since it's a completely independent mahou shoujo series after all. As long as you enjoy fighting loli then it's all good

Thanks for your comment as always
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Old 2016-03-12, 05:40   Link #71
Assort Dis
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Because there is not enough Murakumo.

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Old 2016-03-13, 12:53   Link #72
Assort Dis
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And here is another Murakumo



I would appreciate critics or comments!
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