Nanoha FanFiction Discussion

[DezoPenguin]

Originally Posted by RadiantBeam

I know a little bit. Mostly they tend to write NanoFate stories and are especially skilled at using Japanese terms and the like, and they tend to get positive feedback on a lot of their work. I personally never really cared for what they write, but eh, personal opinion.

*nod* Usually NanoFate AUs, from what I remember. That's generally not my thing, so I don't really read them either, but they do seem popular with NanoFate fans.

Originally Posted by yuiseppe

Speaking of unfinished, I vaguely remember some military-esque Vi x Syn (har har 'vixen' hahar...argh...*falls over, revealing a knife in the back*)

Ah, yes, "Synergy." *eyeballs Satashi* I believe Vivio and Syn have been tied up together for over a year now.

Syn: Hey, I like bondage fun as much as the next girl, but this is ridiculous!
Vivio: *innocent whistle*

[RadiantBeam]

Originally Posted by DezoPenguin

Syn: Hey, I like bondage fun as much as the next girl, but this is ridiculous!
Vivio: *innocent whistle*

Caro: Now I understand why you never do anything with Vivio, Lu-chan!
Lutecia: Ha?
Caro: You're afraid that if you try using your bug summons on her, she'll be scared off!
Lutecia: .... *facepalm*

[00-Raiser]

Originally Posted by Kaijo

Unexpected Expectations

Chapter 11: Sacrifices

Previous chapters to the story can be found here.

Spoiler for Unexpected Expectations, Chapter 11: Sacrifices:

Do you really think they'll live any of us alive (should be leave)

At least her get out of this (At least let her get out of this)

He research told him the initiator (His)

but she had no purchase and thus they lacked a lot of strength (I don't understand what this means)

but her angkle was grabbed (ankle)

Her was raised head (Her head was raised)

A few mistakes pointed out in the quote.

Well, this was certainly an intense, action packed chapter. Very suspenseful and makes me want to know what happens next right now! Great job and hurry up with the finale!

[Kaijo]

Originally Posted by 00-Raiser

A few mistakes pointed out in the quote.

Well, this was certainly an intense, action packed chapter. Very suspenseful and makes me want to know what happens next right now! Great job and hurry up with the finale!

Fixed, thanks!

I do want to address the one line you didn't understand: "Fate kicked and punched as best she could, but she had no purchase and thus they lacked a lot of strength. "

I hoped I was phrasing it right, but the idea I was trying to get across, was that she had no real way to brace herself to put enough power in her punches and kicks. When you go to punch someone, you brace your feet and are essentially pushing off the ground to put power into your attack.

If the wording seems a bit too odd, I can try to modify it. I'll see if I can come up with something a bit clearer.

[DezoPenguin]

Originally Posted by Kaijo

Fixed, thanks!

I do want to address the one line you didn't understand: "Fate kicked and punched as best she could, but she had no purchase and thus they lacked a lot of strength. "

I hoped I was phrasing it right, but the idea I was trying to get across, was that she had no real way to brace herself to put enough power in her punches and kicks. When you go to punch someone, you brace your feet and are essentially pushing off the ground to put power into your attack.

If the wording seems a bit too odd, I can try to modify it. I'll see if I can come up with something a bit clearer.

Try something along the lines of, "Fate fought back as best she could, but without leverage she couldn't get any strength behind her blows," perhaps. The problem with the wording as originally phrased is that the pronoun "they" (meaning, "her kicks and punches") doesn't have a proper antecedent, so it makes things a little puzzling.

Gikan, I must say, is a classic case of the extreme end of the "Proud Warrior Race Guy" scale, where she's replaced thought with pride and honor with bloodlust. Her logic is completely circular: "We're teetering on the edge of survival...so we adopted our ways which while seeming harsh were necessary for our survival...so we must continue to preserve those ways...even though following those ways means that we can't accept help from anybody or actually try to find practical solutions for our problems...so we are teetering on the edge of survival...so it's necessary to adopt ways to survive that are extreme..." Glad Frey noticed that randomly slaughtering the hostages while the people being extorted are complying with your extortion isn't the best way to deal with a hostage situation (Poor girl, coming face to face with the revelation that "I've spent my entire life desperately seeking affirmation that I'm worthy from a bunch of complete asshats who wouldn't know a viable standard of worthiness if it bit them on the leg. No wonder they exiled me; clearly I'm just not enough of a piece of filth to fit in with them."). I'm just surprised that Yuuno didn't have time for a "Look, you idiot, of course I double-crossed you. Killing Aina proved to me that you were just going to murder everyone anyway, so I'd have to be a complete moron to play along with you." speech.

[00-Raiser]

I was confused by the use of the word "purchase", actually.

[Kaijo]

Originally Posted by DezoPenguin

Try something along the lines of, "Fate fought back as best she could, but without leverage she couldn't get any strength behind her blows," perhaps. The problem with the wording as originally phrased is that the pronoun "they" (meaning, "her kicks and punches") doesn't have a proper antecedent, so it makes things a little puzzling.

That helps a ton, thanks! Sometimes my mind just plain hits a wall with regard to word use, and I can't think of something better to put there.

Gikan, I must say, is a classic case of the extreme end of the "Proud Warrior Race Guy" scale, where she's replaced thought with pride and honor with bloodlust. Her logic is completely circular: "We're teetering on the edge of survival...so we adopted our ways which while seeming harsh were necessary for our survival...so we must continue to preserve those ways...even though following those ways means that we can't accept help from anybody or actually try to find practical solutions for our problems...so we are teetering on the edge of survival...so it's necessary to adopt ways to survive that are extreme..." Glad Frey noticed that randomly slaughtering the hostages while the people being extorted are complying with your extortion isn't the best way to deal with a hostage situation (Poor girl, coming face to face with the revelation that "I've spent my entire life desperately seeking affirmation that I'm worthy from a bunch of complete asshats who wouldn't know a viable standard of worthiness if it bit them on the leg. No wonder they exiled me; clearly I'm just not enough of a piece of filth to fit in with them."). I'm just surprised that Yuuno didn't have time for a "Look, you idiot, of course I double-crossed you. Killing Aina proved to me that you were just going to murder everyone anyway, so I'd have to be a complete moron to play along with you." speech.

Well, to be fair, he doesn't know about Aina at the moment. But he can probably guess that, since they want their society to remain a secret, none of them will live long after they get what they want.

And about Gikan, yeah. Sometimes, when you live so long a certain way, you can't see anything else. You have your set of beliefs, and accepting anything else would mean you were wrong for a long time, and that's not something a pysche can usually deal with. So instead of feeling guilt for what they are doing, they push it off onto someone else; "they're wrong, not me. It's all their fault!" But doing so is human, and I like my antagonists to have reasons.^^

Thanks for the commentary!

[00-Raiser]

Posted my Vivio/Einhart short to FF.net, adding a note for the sole purpose of embarassing Satashi

[Kaijo]

Unexpected Expectations, Chapter 11: Sacrifices, is now up on ff.net here.

[00-Raiser]

Originally Posted by Kaijo

Unexpected Expectations, Chapter 11: Sacrifices, is now up on ff.net here.

Ok, using leverage definitely makes things clearer.

And reviewed

[kaname08]

After looking at DezoPenguin's comment...I began to wonder...though I'm sure not many do this but, have any of you guys ever done a scenario in which a character(s) acted like "guinea pigs" for someone else's schemes / plots that involved something...kinky?

I was looking back through some of the scenarios I tried to conjure up and well...I thought back to what I had planned for a possible lemon sometime soon. I thought of using that scenario that I mentioned and having my main OC in my current Nanoha fanfic be the guinea pig in doing Nanoha "dirty" work.

I was thinking back to that yuri h-doujin of Spoonful 2 and the use of pills which is what inspired me to create a few different scenarios.

This is what came up as another possibility:

Spoiler for Sneaky Tricks:

After Shiro’s third sparring practice for the day had ended, he was just about to head to the dorms to go change up when his device notified him of a call from Nanoha.

‘Sir…incoming message from Captain Takamachi,’ chirped Timaeus.

“Put it through,” ordered Shiro.

A few seconds later, a small screen popped up showing the Ace of Aces in her office.

“What can I help you with Captain?” asked Shiro.

Nanoha chuckled nervously which gave Shiro an immediate warning sign that something unpleasant was going to occur.

“Um…do you remember those pills that were from Shamal?” asked Nanoha.

Shiro nodded slightly. “What about them?”

She was silent for a moment and blushed slightly, which then gave Shiro the answer he suspected.

“You’re kidding me right? You want me to ask her THAT?” asked Shiro. “How much did you use?”

“Ahaha…well…two pills a day,” she replied.

His eyes went bug-eyed upon hearing the number. “What is with you these days? No wonder Vita gets annoyed when you’re all over Fate.”

“Well…it was Hayate’s idea so…I was thinking of paying her back again for that,” answered Nanoha.

Shiro’s face went pale upon hearing that comment. “Oh no…no way…forget it. Why are you even dragging me into your schemes?”

“If you’re not willing to help…I could just slip one of them into your drink without knowing as punishment,” warned the Ace.

Shiro felt cold sweat running down his back at the threat. ‘Damn you Hayate,’ he thought.

“Alright…what is it?” asked Shiro.

Nanoha then told him of the details consisting of asking Shamal about the pills that she slipped into Shiro’s uniform and then about some sleeping pills. Shiro didn’t even have to go THAT far into guessing as to the use and what the Ace had in mind.

‘She’s making this difficult for me intentionally,’ thought Shiro.

“I always wondered why Fate considered you to be the rough type when together,” said Shiro.

“Just like you're into girls that are the dominant type…which I sometimes do I might add,” teased Nanoha.

‘Me and my big mouth,’ thought Shiro.

Also...with the whole 'genderbending' idea...though I rarely see it...something came up when I was thinking about it and well...to me...the whole waking up as the opposite gender one day scenario...for some reason...I find kinda amusing.

[TheShinySword]

Originally Posted by 00-Raiser

I was confused by the use of the word "purchase", actually.

Well you see, fate was trying to kick and punch as best as she could but she had forgotten to purchase the special updates to her fists and feet.

[sniperk]

Okay. I MUST buy a laptop before my next trip. Everytime I come back here the backlog is insane. -.-"

Originally Posted by 00-Raiser

Yeah, I always used --- between scenes, and a full line to separate the author's notes. I did it this way because I think a full line across the page differentiates things too much.

Anyways, today Alavon challenged me to write a Fate/Chrono under 500 words.

... It ended up being 689 words Well, she doesn't mind

Spoiler for Westermarck's Folly:

*snip*

Cute. Anymore than this and it would be a sacrilege. *meekly waves a ChronoxAmy flag*

Originally Posted by 00-Raiser

Thanks! I've never been good at coming up with titles, so I went to TV tropes to the not related by blood page to see if I could find something. There it mentions Westermarck's effect, something I had known about before, and decided to use that some how. I think this is the most intelligent title I've ever come up with I was wondering if anyone else would understand it

For those who don't know, Westermarck's effect is when two people raised in close vicinity become immune to sexual attraction towards each other. Chrono and Fate in this case did grow up together, yet they were still attracted to each other, hense Westermarck's Folly.

And yeah, poor Amy To pair Chrono with anyone else she has to be removed somehow. I'm not exactly pleased that has to be so. Well, I figured Chrono marrying her as an escape/smoke screen would work, since cases of that happen in real life, mainly with homosexuals hiding their sexuality (though that is less common these days).

I may be wrong in this, but isn't the Westermarck Effect suppose to act only when the kids are raised together before the age of six? I'm not expert on the subject, but I did a little research on it for a plot bunny that keeps haunting me.

Originally Posted by Moczo

Turns out I'm in a clownier mood than I thought. It's a little short, but it's longer than the 'nothing' I was expecting to write. I'll put it on ff.net some time today, but right now I'm just too lazy to go over there and log in. I mean, that's like... twenty keys I'd have to press.

Spoiler for Center Ring, Part 4:

*snip*

Spoiler for Author's Notes:

Actually, I don't have anything to say in particular. I have somehow managed to rope myself into a clown/clown romance set against the backdrop of a mad scientist's quest to command the Ultimate Circus for unknown, yet likely nefarious, purposes. I don't know if there's anything I can really add to that.

EDIT: All right, she's up on FF.net at http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5883307/4/Center_Ring

Enjoy!

Okay. Laughed more than I would (or should) because it was notably less funny than the previous ones, but you kept the plot running, and that was enough to keep me hooked.

Originally Posted by 00-Raiser

I've seen their fics listed on FF.net before, but never read them for obvious reasons.

I gave up starting to read their fics. They said on their profile that they have several of them unfinished, so I never know when (if) they'll finish it.

[RadiantBeam]

Originally Posted by TheShinySword

Well you see, fate was trying to kick and punch as best as she could but she had forgotten to purchase the special updates to her fists and feet.

She was trying to mimic Subaru's fighting style?

[00-Raiser]

Originally Posted by sniperk

I may be wrong in this, but isn't the Westermarck Effect suppose to act only when the kids are raised together before the age of six? I'm not expert on the subject, but I did a little research on it for a plot bunny that keeps haunting me.

You're not exactly wrong, as it does develop in the earlier years. Still, I think the general idea still works for what I was getting at with that title

[Kaijo]

Unexpected Expectations

Chapter 12: Acceptance

Previous chapters can be found here.

Spoiler for Unexpected Expectations, Chapter 12: Acceptance:

Unexpected Expectations
Chapter 12: Acceptance

Xx~~*~~xX

The rain pounded hard against the rooftop, echoing inside the chapel but going mostly unnoticed by those inside; their attention was focused forward, on the woman who had just stepped up to speak.

"We're all here for a single purpose," Fate solemnly told the assembly. "To honor the memory of one who gave his life in the line of duty. All of us here know of Yuuno Scyra, and most have worked with him in various capacities. I'd like to say my first memories of him were pleasant, but at the time, he was just another another enemy. A discovery of his would intertwine our lives in a way I would never be able to foresee; and in time, it brought us all together. Somehow or another, he touched each of our lives in special ways."

She paused, and even though Nanoha had her head bowed to try and hide her tears from where she sat in the front row and leaning into her mother's one-armed hug, she knew Fate was looking at her. That she was crying at all was an improvement, compared to the zombie-like state of the past week. In her mind, she could still see Yuuno teleporting in front of her, the spear plunging into his body, telling her to live, and then falling to his death. The shock had been too much and sent her into a catatonic state after.

"He always had a way of doing just what we needed at the time, silently supporting us from the background," Fate continued. "His presence wasn't all that strong or forceful, and sometimes you might even have forgotten he was there; and yet his loss lays bear the huge truth of the large part he played. For in all he did, he was always thinking of other people and how he could help them, rarely giving a thought to his own feelings."

For the thousandth time, Nanoha lifted her hand under her black veil, to wipe her eyes with another dampening handkerchief. She had promised herself she wouldn't cry during this and to save her tears for afterward, but it was no use; the tears just wouldn't stop. She leaned a bit more into her mother as the arm around her shoulders gave her a comforting squeeze, and briefly raised her head to see the picture of Yuuno's smiling face in the photo frame, surrounded by flowers in front of the podium, just above the half-open casket that contained his body.

No....

Fate took a small pause as she gazed around at all the solemn faces, then resumed. "But even though he's no longer physically among us, his memory will always remain. He's left behind a piece of himself within all of us, and as long as we remember that, he'll always be here."

Nanoha's hand went to her stomach, now showing a bit of a bulge. Fate's words applied more literally to her, for even though the act that created it was mired in intense feelings and unusual circumstances, the baby within her was truly the best legacy he could have left. Thus, she knew she had to be strong, so the child could grow up and ultimately know what a good man his or her father was.

"There is so much more I... find myself wanting to say," Fate said, her head lowering as she grasped the sides of the podium, her voice cracking slightly. "I could go on for hours about what's he done. But I'll just say that, even though Arf was always with me, and Nanoha was my first real friend... where I am today is in large part to him. He was, and always will be... my friend."

This can't be happening....

As Fate's voice cracked a bit at the last line, Nanoha felt a gusher of emotion well up inside, despite thinking she finally had it under control. She nearly hiccuped, as her silent tears threatened to come out in full force once more; Yuuno's death was affecting Fate almost as strongly, and yet she seem to be able to compose herself.

[Yuuno, why?] the thought came over and over to her again, among other questions that would forever lack answers. [Why couldn't we just work things out? Why do we say things after a death, that we are too stubborn and pigheaded to say in life? Why did all this have to happen? Why couldn't I have been stronger? If I was, none of this would have happened!]

"Thank you all for coming," Fate offered in closing. "Wherever he is now, Yuuno would be overjoyed to know he had so many who cared."

This isn't the way it should be!

The short service ended and Nanoha realized what came next, although she was fearful; viewing the body. She knew everyone else was waiting on her to go first, milling out into the reception area to politely give her time and space. She was grateful for that and to her mom as well, who said nothing, but merely remained at her side, arm around her shoulders. It was a silent strength she was offering, giving her daughter all the time she needed, letting her know she wasn't alone.

Fate came around to sit on Nanoha's left, taking her left hand and giving it a gentle squeeze, smiling gently as Nanoha looked up. She realized then, that she wasn't being her normal self, someone who was strong in the face of adversity, but instead letting her emotions overwhelmingly control her and force her into weakness. She had to be strong, for Yuuno; she could do this. Somehow, that seemed to work, and she stood and crossed over to the half-open casket.

He looked peaceful, she decided, as if in sleep; albeit one from which he would never again awaken. Where he would never smile at her again, or share a meal and light-hearted conversation with. She reached out to light brush the hair above his forehead, as if to really confirm that he was gone; that he wouldn't suddenly spring up and inform her that it was all a joke.

But it wasn't a joke; he was gone.

NO!

x~~*~~x

As Yuuno began to fall face-forward off the catwalk, time slowed to standstill, and a pain like no other welled up from inside, turning into a scream as she tried to reach for him.

"YUUNO!"

And she remembered.

x~~*~~x

She felt him pull back a bit, as one arm dropped. "No, it's okay, really. Although sometimes I wish things could be undone, I can... what's that?"

Yuuno had pulled a small, black rectangular box-like object out of his pocket, his gaze turning serious, while his face became full of concern. "There is a way..."

More curious that anything, Nanoha studied the small object. "A way? What do you mean?"

He stepped forward, raising the object to her head. "A way to erase your memory of the incident, so you can live normally again. You won't have to suffer."

The idea surprised her, but it was also somehow appealing; if she didn't remember what happened, she'd no longer be afraid. She really could go back to being herself. The event had taken something from her, leaving a hollow void behind; she didn't feel like Nanoha anymore, and she could admit hating it. The fear, the uncertainty, the way her emotions and body would overreact at the smallest thing.

But then his hand dropped, his head lowered. "I can't do it. I thought I could. Erase your memories so that you'd be happy, but I realize now I'm really doing it for me, to erase my own guilt. I wasn't taking your feelings into consideration. Fate was right."

"Yuuno-kun?" Nanoha questioned, shocked at the amount of guilt and grief nakedly displayed on his face; it only increased her own heartache at what they had both been through.

"I..." his voice quivered a bit, and she could see the conflict within him. "I just want you to be happy."

"It's okay," she soothed. “I understand.”

And she did, as she reached out to take his wrist, the one that held the object and raised it back up. She could feel the sorrow within him, that he really was thinking of her the entire time, even if he went about it the wrong way. But now she could be strong for him, and do something to ease his pain like she had done over a month ago.

"Do it," she told him. "If you think you can. This is hurting us both, and not a day goes by when I hate how I've become, wishing I could be back to normal. And then we can both put this behind us."

His eyes were wide as he stared at her, his hand hovering in mid-air, hesitant, and disbelieving. His mouth opened seemingly to speak, but no sound came out.

"Yuuno..." she called lightly, willing her feelings across. "It's okay."

He nodded, then reached over to place the object against her forward, ad she closed her eyes, her thoughts going a million miles per second. It was cool against her skin, but warming up, and suddenly she realized something important.

Her eyes flashed open and she started to tell him... and then a blinding white light filled her vision, and she could no longer remember what she was going to say.

x~~*~~x

[It was my fault!] she realized with anguish as she leaned after him, his body still just out of reach. [If I had just been strong enough...!]

"NO!" she cried as time seemed to return to normal.

She leapt off the catwalk after him, feeling a strange sort of strength welling inside while raising her glowing right hand to her neck, a small blast of magic being just enough to break the collar. With that limitation gone, she grabbed his body with her other arm and slowed their fall, floating down to the ground below.

"It's alright, Yuuno, I'll save you!" she called fracntically, breaking off the spear end protruding from his backside so she could lay him down. "Just don't die on me!"

Some part of her mind noted noises outside and the sound of doors opening, but her focus was on the man before her; she pulled off her sweater, using it to staunch the blood-flow on his chest, but she noted it was very close to his heart and there was a lot of blood already. Still, she could see his chest rise and fall ever so slightly, so he had to still be alive.

He just had to be!

"You're under arrest!" Signum's voice announced. "Disarm and you'll be granted the chance to defend yourself in a court of law."

"That... male..." Leethe said, surprise in her voice as her swords clattered to the ground and vanished.. "He gave his life for her...."

"Nanoha?"

Her head came up. "Hayate? Shamal! Help me! Help Yuuno!"

The two women leaned down on the other side of the body as Shamal placed her right hand on the body, her rings flaring with green light, and a holographic window opening nearby displaying his vitals. Nanoha didn't understand much of the medical display, but her body went cold as she recognized the line reserved to measure heart rate.

It was a flat line.

"Nanoha, what happened here?" Hayate asked. "We got word that Yuuno had broken in and stolen a lost logia from the vault. It was only through the tracking spell put on all of them, that we managed to find you guys."

"He had to," Nanoha replied, her voice breaking at the sight of his now-pale skin and the fact that she couldn't tell anymore if he was breathing. "To save us. Shamal? Please tell me he'll be alright!"

"He's suffered a lot of damage prior to the obvious chest wound," the Belkan Doctor explained, her voice hesitant. "There was internal bleeding and hemorrhaging, too. Broken ribs, fractured skull, no heart beat.... oh no..."

The doctor's hand froze over his heart, right next to the ice spear, and her eyes closed. When they opened, Shamal slowly pulled her hand from Yuuno, to which Nanoha raised her head and met the other woman's sorrowful eyes, her heart breaking as Shamal sadly shook her head and uttered the words.

"I'm sorry, Nanoha."

Her vision blurry, Nanoha barely saw Hayate shift to her side and grab her in a hug, as the former-amnesiac descended into tears.

x~~*~~x

"We're home!" Nanoha called.

Fate lifted her head from the kitchen as the pair entered the living room. "Welcome back! How did it go?"

Nanoha gestured to the person in the wheelchair she was pushing. "Aina's physical therapy lessons are coming along nicely. It shouldn't be too much longer until she can walk again."

The housemaid blushed. "I really don't think I'm making much progress, but it's kind of you to say so. I'm just grateful you're giving me a place to stay."

"Well, ever since you came out of your coma 3 months ago, you needed some place to stay," Nanoha told her pointedly, placing a hand on the woman's shoulder. "And as far as I'm concerned, you're family!"

Fate smiled as Aina patted the hand gratefully, then snapped her fingers. "Oh, I received a letter from Quin, Mallory, and Frey earlier. The transition is going good back on their planet. Even though there have been some rough spots, the Quessna tribe is reintegrating well with the other villages. Arla has been surprisingly more pragmatic about the tribe's survival."

"That's good to hear; I'm happy for them," Nanoha replied, looking around. "By the way, where is Yuuno?"

"Oh, he's asleep in his room," Fate informed her. "He had a bit of a rough day."

Nanoha nodded and smiled. "I think I want to peek in on him; can you take care of Aina for me, for a bit?"

As soon as Fate gave her assent, Nanoha headed back to the hall and went upstairs, finding the bedroom labeled "Yuuno" and slowly opening the door as quietly as she could, so as to not wake him. It appeared to go successfully, as she gently tiptoed over and gazed down at his lovely, sleeping face. He was so peaceful, and it was moments like these that made her heart melt and strengthen her will to live.

And then his eyes fluttered open and saw her, and began to cry.

Nanoha sighed as she reached in and picked him up. "Oh, I should have figured you'd do this to me. You probably sensed me come in. Let me guess; someone is hungry?"

As she gently held her 4-month-old son against her shoulder and rubbed his back, the crying continued, and Nanoha realized it would take too long to prepare a bottle and thus retired to the rocking chair in the corner. Yuuno continued to cry and paw at her chest as she lowered him.

"Hold on, hold on, mama will feed you in a bit," she cooed, which seemed to soothe him as she raised her shirt with her free hand.

In moments, she had him in place, and felt oddly at peace as her son suckled. There had been many times when she wondered if this was worth it, and yet now, at this very moment, she knew it was. She couldn't imagine life without him.

After several minutes, Fate peeked her head in through the door, into the darkened room, and smiled. "I wondered what was keeping you; I should have figured." She crept in and closed the door behind her to keep the room dark. "He had been asleep for a few hours, so I suppose I should have expected he'd be up soon and want to be fed. I should have prepared a bottle; I'm sorry."

"Don't be silly," Nanoha chided her, as the other woman sat down in a reclining chair next to her. "You do a lot for Vivio, Yuuno, and I already. You've always done a lot for us; I'm really glad you're here."

"I'm glad to be here," Fate admitted, reaching across to gently squeeze Nanoha's arm. "Aina is resting in her room for now, watching her shows, so we have some time before dinner." She paused, and Nanoha sensed the other woman's gaze on her. "Are you planning on going to visit him?"

Nanoha was silent for a minute, before looking down at her son and nodded, whispering, "Yes. It's our 1-year anniversary, after all."

x~~*~~x

"Hello, Yuuno, it's been awhile," Nanoha greeted, then held up her hand. "No, don't say anything; I have a lot to tell you. I know I haven't visited as often as I should have, but I'm here now. I'm doing well, as is your son, so don't worry about that. We're all doing the best we can, so you can rest easy, and be proud of us.

She paused, reaching up to wipe a tear from her eye. "It's funny; I could have sworn I had more to say, but standing here right now, I just can't find the words. Oh! Hayate's investigation into the Procreat enabled her to apprehend the people responsible for keeping it's existence secret; so if you had never gone digging into that, they could have still managed to keep using it to hurt other people. And also, Quinn and Mallory are doing well, so you'll be glad to hear that. They are both eternally grateful to you for bringing them back together. If you ever doubted making that journey, don't; Mallory would never have lived if you hadn't.

She chuckled. "Speaking of which, Frey is also doing well, despite missing her mother. Even though Gikan is still serving her sentence, Frey does miss her, and visits often. Although Leethe may see a bit of an early release, due to good behavior. Gikan, however, is still holding onto her anger. You'd think she would have let it go by now, but she's incredibly stubborn. Fortunately, so is Frey; she managed to convince Arla to have the Quessna tribe join the real world, and it's going smoothly. The genetic damage has been repaired among many of the women, and despite some... misunderstandings, quite a few of the Quessna warriors are finding normal relationships with men."

She chuckled at a memory of a video Frey had sent her once, of how heavy-handed the initial courting attempts of some of the women were; it conjured up her mind a vision of a cave woman clubbing a man over the head and dragging him back to a cave. There was apparently quite a bit of learning that needed to be done.

Nanoha shook her head. "I'm sorry, my mind drifted there. I just... I have so much I want to tell you, about how I feel, both back then and right now. A part of me hates that I never said what I truly felt when I had the chance, and I suppose it will always be a regret. I just miss you so much, and I ache whenever I think of you. But don't worry, I'm not going to do anything stupid; I know you'd never forgive me if I did. I have to live, not only for our son, whom I treasure so much, but for Vivio, Fate, and all our friends.

A smile slowly formed on her lips as she raised her right hand and placed it on her heart. "But no matter what, you'll always have a place here. And I'll never forget you, Yuuno Scrya. I'll visit as often as need be, so you don't get lonely."

She blinked her eyes at the wetness she suddenly noticed, then finally leaned down and placed the bouquet of flowers on the tombstone, next to the lit incense candle. Satisfied, as if a great weight had been lifted off her shoulders, she turned to see Fate standing there, not even realizing the other woman had crept up.

"I'm ready to go," Nanoha declared, wiping her eyes. "Yuuno-kun wouldn't want me to stay sad forever."

Fate crossed the short distance and hugged the other woman. "I know; he was my friend, too. I cared about him just as much."

Nanoha squeezed the other woman tightly. "And if there's one thing my experience with him taught me, was that sometimes you shouldn't wait to say what you need to. You've been there for me, for a long time. Not just through what happened last year and my pregnancy, but before that as well." She took a deep breath. "I just want to tell you-"

"Shh, it's okay, I know," Fate replied, interrupting her. "Me, too."

Nanoha squeezed the other woman tightly, knowing everything would be alright now; she had been hurt, but she knew she had the strength to live now.

Xx~~*~~xX

[00-Raiser]

Originally Posted by Kaijo

Unexpected Expectations

Chapter 12: Acceptance

Previous chapters can be found here.

Spoiler for Unexpected Expectations, Chapter 12: Acceptance:

and yet his loss lays bear (should be bare)

to place the object against her forward, ad she closed her eyes (forehead, as)

I was keeping in mind all the tricks you could have pulled while reading it, but I see you played it straight for the most part.

Spoiler for spoilers:

So you ended up letting Aina live to killed Yuuno instead, hmmm

Well I'm not extactly thrilled at your choice of conclusion, but it was still well done and was never outside of the realm of possibility. So good ending, even if I'd prefer something a bit happier Of course I'm sure some will be estatic about it, what with Yuuno dying and the implied NanoFate at the end

Overall, this fic was quite the ride. Kaijo, you took risks and went places few dare to go, not pulling your punches when needed for proper effect and creating a real rollercoaster of drama and emotion. Excellent job my friend, you deserve a standing ovation.

EDIT: Whoops, forgot to mention that I pointed out some errors in the quote.

[RadiantBeam]

Originally Posted by Kaijo

Unexpected Expectations

Chapter 12: Acceptance

Previous chapters can be found here.

Spoiler for Unexpected Expectations, Chapter 12: Acceptance:

Unexpected Expectations
Chapter 12: Acceptance

Xx~~*~~xX

The rain pounded hard against the rooftop, echoing inside the chapel but going mostly unnoticed by those inside; their attention was focused forward, on the woman who had just stepped up to speak.

"We're all here for a single purpose," Fate solemnly told the assembly. "To honor the memory of one who gave his life in the line of duty. All of us here know of Yuuno Scyra, and most have worked with him in various capacities. I'd like to say my first memories of him were pleasant, but at the time, he was just another another enemy. A discovery of his would intertwine our lives in a way I would never be able to foresee; and in time, it brought us all together. Somehow or another, he touched each of our lives in special ways."

She paused, and even though Nanoha had her head bowed to try and hide her tears from where she sat in the front row and leaning into her mother's one-armed hug, she knew Fate was looking at her. That she was crying at all was an improvement, compared to the zombie-like state of the past week. In her mind, she could still see Yuuno teleporting in front of her, the spear plunging into his body, telling her to live, and then falling to his death. The shock had been too much and sent her into a catatonic state after.

"He always had a way of doing just what we needed at the time, silently supporting us from the background," Fate continued. "His presence wasn't all that strong or forceful, and sometimes you might even have forgotten he was there; and yet his loss lays bear the huge truth of the large part he played. For in all he did, he was always thinking of other people and how he could help them, rarely giving a thought to his own feelings."

For the thousandth time, Nanoha lifted her hand under her black veil, to wipe her eyes with another dampening handkerchief. She had promised herself she wouldn't cry during this and to save her tears for afterward, but it was no use; the tears just wouldn't stop. She leaned a bit more into her mother as the arm around her shoulders gave her a comforting squeeze, and briefly raised her head to see the picture of Yuuno's smiling face in the photo frame, surrounded by flowers in front of the podium, just above the half-open casket that contained his body.

No....

Fate took a small pause as she gazed around at all the solemn faces, then resumed. "But even though he's no longer physically among us, his memory will always remain. He's left behind a piece of himself within all of us, and as long as we remember that, he'll always be here."

Nanoha's hand went to her stomach, now showing a bit of a bulge. Fate's words applied more literally to her, for even though the act that created it was mired in intense feelings and unusual circumstances, the baby within her was truly the best legacy he could have left. Thus, she knew she had to be strong, so the child could grow up and ultimately know what a good man his or her father was.

"There is so much more I... find myself wanting to say," Fate said, her head lowering as she grasped the sides of the podium, her voice cracking slightly. "I could go on for hours about what's he done. But I'll just say that, even though Arf was always with me, and Nanoha was my first real friend... where I am today is in large part to him. He was, and always will be... my friend."

This can't be happening....

As Fate's voice cracked a bit at the last line, Nanoha felt a gusher of emotion well up inside, despite thinking she finally had it under control. She nearly hiccuped, as her silent tears threatened to come out in full force once more; Yuuno's death was affecting Fate almost as strongly, and yet she seem to be able to compose herself.

[Yuuno, why?] the thought came over and over to her again, among other questions that would forever lack answers. [Why couldn't we just work things out? Why do we say things after a death, that we are too stubborn and pigheaded to say in life? Why did all this have to happen? Why couldn't I have been stronger? If I was, none of this would have happened!]

"Thank you all for coming," Fate offered in closing. "Wherever he is now, Yuuno would be overjoyed to know he had so many who cared."

This isn't the way it should be!

The short service ended and Nanoha realized what came next, although she was fearful; viewing the body. She knew everyone else was waiting on her to go first, milling out into the reception area to politely give her time and space. She was grateful for that and to her mom as well, who said nothing, but merely remained at her side, arm around her shoulders. It was a silent strength she was offering, giving her daughter all the time she needed, letting her know she wasn't alone.

Fate came around to sit on Nanoha's left, taking her left hand and giving it a gentle squeeze, smiling gently as Nanoha looked up. She realized then, that she wasn't being her normal self, someone who was strong in the face of adversity, but instead letting her emotions overwhelmingly control her and force her into weakness. She had to be strong, for Yuuno; she could do this. Somehow, that seemed to work, and she stood and crossed over to the half-open casket.

He looked peaceful, she decided, as if in sleep; albeit one from which he would never again awaken. Where he would never smile at her again, or share a meal and light-hearted conversation with. She reached out to light brush the hair above his forehead, as if to really confirm that he was gone; that he wouldn't suddenly spring up and inform her that it was all a joke.

But it wasn't a joke; he was gone.

NO!

x~~*~~x

As Yuuno began to fall face-forward off the catwalk, time slowed to standstill, and a pain like no other welled up from inside, turning into a scream as she tried to reach for him.

"YUUNO!"

And she remembered.

x~~*~~x

She felt him pull back a bit, as one arm dropped. "No, it's okay, really. Although sometimes I wish things could be undone, I can... what's that?"

Yuuno had pulled a small, black rectangular box-like object out of his pocket, his gaze turning serious, while his face became full of concern. "There is a way..."

More curious that anything, Nanoha studied the small object. "A way? What do you mean?"

He stepped forward, raising the object to her head. "A way to erase your memory of the incident, so you can live normally again. You won't have to suffer."

The idea surprised her, but it was also somehow appealing; if she didn't remember what happened, she'd no longer be afraid. She really could go back to being herself. The event had taken something from her, leaving a hollow void behind; she didn't feel like Nanoha anymore, and she could admit hating it. The fear, the uncertainty, the way her emotions and body would overreact at the smallest thing.

But then his hand dropped, his head lowered. "I can't do it. I thought I could. Erase your memories so that you'd be happy, but I realize now I'm really doing it for me, to erase my own guilt. I wasn't taking your feelings into consideration. Fate was right."

"Yuuno-kun?" Nanoha questioned, shocked at the amount of guilt and grief nakedly displayed on his face; it only increased her own heartache at what they had both been through.

"I..." his voice quivered a bit, and she could see the conflict within him. "I just want you to be happy."

"It's okay," she soothed. “I understand.”

And she did, as she reached out to take his wrist, the one that held the object and raised it back up. She could feel the sorrow within him, that he really was thinking of her the entire time, even if he went about it the wrong way. But now she could be strong for him, and do something to ease his pain like she had done over a month ago.

"Do it," she told him. "If you think you can. This is hurting us both, and not a day goes by when I hate how I've become, wishing I could be back to normal. And then we can both put this behind us."

His eyes were wide as he stared at her, his hand hovering in mid-air, hesitant, and disbelieving. His mouth opened seemingly to speak, but no sound came out.

"Yuuno..." she called lightly, willing her feelings across. "It's okay."

He nodded, then reached over to place the object against her forward, ad she closed her eyes, her thoughts going a million miles per second. It was cool against her skin, but warming up, and suddenly she realized something important.

Her eyes flashed open and she started to tell him... and then a blinding white light filled her vision, and she could no longer remember what she was going to say.

x~~*~~x

[It was my fault!] she realized with anguish as she leaned after him, his body still just out of reach. [If I had just been strong enough...!]

"NO!" she cried as time seemed to return to normal.

She leapt off the catwalk after him, feeling a strange sort of strength welling inside while raising her glowing right hand to her neck, a small blast of magic being just enough to break the collar. With that limitation gone, she grabbed his body with her other arm and slowed their fall, floating down to the ground below.

"It's alright, Yuuno, I'll save you!" she called fracntically, breaking off the spear end protruding from his backside so she could lay him down. "Just don't die on me!"

Some part of her mind noted noises outside and the sound of doors opening, but her focus was on the man before her; she pulled off her sweater, using it to staunch the blood-flow on his chest, but she noted it was very close to his heart and there was a lot of blood already. Still, she could see his chest rise and fall ever so slightly, so he had to still be alive.

He just had to be!

"You're under arrest!" Signum's voice announced. "Disarm and you'll be granted the chance to defend yourself in a court of law."

"That... male..." Leethe said, surprise in her voice as her swords clattered to the ground and vanished.. "He gave his life for her...."

"Nanoha?"

Her head came up. "Hayate? Shamal! Help me! Help Yuuno!"

The two women leaned down on the other side of the body as Shamal placed her right hand on the body, her rings flaring with green light, and a holographic window opening nearby displaying his vitals. Nanoha didn't understand much of the medical display, but her body went cold as she recognized the line reserved to measure heart rate.

It was a flat line.

"Nanoha, what happened here?" Hayate asked. "We got word that Yuuno had broken in and stolen a lost logia from the vault. It was only through the tracking spell put on all of them, that we managed to find you guys."

"He had to," Nanoha replied, her voice breaking at the sight of his now-pale skin and the fact that she couldn't tell anymore if he was breathing. "To save us. Shamal? Please tell me he'll be alright!"

"He's suffered a lot of damage prior to the obvious chest wound," the Belkan Doctor explained, her voice hesitant. "There was internal bleeding and hemorrhaging, too. Broken ribs, fractured skull, no heart beat.... oh no..."

The doctor's hand froze over his heart, right next to the ice spear, and her eyes closed. When they opened, Shamal slowly pulled her hand from Yuuno, to which Nanoha raised her head and met the other woman's sorrowful eyes, her heart breaking as Shamal sadly shook her head and uttered the words.

"I'm sorry, Nanoha."

Her vision blurry, Nanoha barely saw Hayate shift to her side and grab her in a hug, as the former-amnesiac descended into tears.

x~~*~~x

"We're home!" Nanoha called.

Fate lifted her head from the kitchen as the pair entered the living room. "Welcome back! How did it go?"

Nanoha gestured to the person in the wheelchair she was pushing. "Aina's physical therapy lessons are coming along nicely. It shouldn't be too much longer until she can walk again."

The housemaid blushed. "I really don't think I'm making much progress, but it's kind of you to say so. I'm just grateful you're giving me a place to stay."

"Well, ever since you came out of your coma 3 months ago, you needed some place to stay," Nanoha told her pointedly, placing a hand on the woman's shoulder. "And as far as I'm concerned, you're family!"

Fate smiled as Aina patted the hand gratefully, then snapped her fingers. "Oh, I received a letter from Quin, Mallory, and Frey earlier. The transition is going good back on their planet. Even though there have been some rough spots, the Quessna tribe is reintegrating well with the other villages. Arla has been surprisingly more pragmatic about the tribe's survival."

"That's good to hear; I'm happy for them," Nanoha replied, looking around. "By the way, where is Yuuno?"

"Oh, he's asleep in his room," Fate informed her. "He had a bit of a rough day."

Nanoha nodded and smiled. "I think I want to peek in on him; can you take care of Aina for me, for a bit?"

As soon as Fate gave her assent, Nanoha headed back to the hall and went upstairs, finding the bedroom labeled "Yuuno" and slowly opening the door as quietly as she could, so as to not wake him. It appeared to go successfully, as she gently tiptoed over and gazed down at his lovely, sleeping face. He was so peaceful, and it was moments like these that made her heart melt and strengthen her will to live.

And then his eyes fluttered open and saw her, and began to cry.

Nanoha sighed as she reached in and picked him up. "Oh, I should have figured you'd do this to me. You probably sensed me come in. Let me guess; someone is hungry?"

As she gently held her 4-month-old son against her shoulder and rubbed his back, the crying continued, and Nanoha realized it would take too long to prepare a bottle and thus retired to the rocking chair in the corner. Yuuno continued to cry and paw at her chest as she lowered him.

"Hold on, hold on, mama will feed you in a bit," she cooed, which seemed to soothe him as she raised her shirt with her free hand.

In moments, she had him in place, and felt oddly at peace as her son suckled. There had been many times when she wondered if this was worth it, and yet now, at this very moment, she knew it was. She couldn't imagine life without him.

After several minutes, Fate peeked her head in through the door, into the darkened room, and smiled. "I wondered what was keeping you; I should have figured." She crept in and closed the door behind her to keep the room dark. "He had been asleep for a few hours, so I suppose I should have expected he'd be up soon and want to be fed. I should have prepared a bottle; I'm sorry."

"Don't be silly," Nanoha chided her, as the other woman sat down in a reclining chair next to her. "You do a lot for Vivio, Yuuno, and I already. You've always done a lot for us; I'm really glad you're here."

"I'm glad to be here," Fate admitted, reaching across to gently squeeze Nanoha's arm. "Aina is resting in her room for now, watching her shows, so we have some time before dinner." She paused, and Nanoha sensed the other woman's gaze on her. "Are you planning on going to visit him?"

Nanoha was silent for a minute, before looking down at her son and nodded, whispering, "Yes. It's our 1-year anniversary, after all."

x~~*~~x

"Hello, Yuuno, it's been awhile," Nanoha greeted, then held up her hand. "No, don't say anything; I have a lot to tell you. I know I haven't visited as often as I should have, but I'm here now. I'm doing well, as is your son, so don't worry about that. We're all doing the best we can, so you can rest easy, and be proud of us.

She paused, reaching up to wipe a tear from her eye. "It's funny; I could have sworn I had more to say, but standing here right now, I just can't find the words. Oh! Hayate's investigation into the Procreat enabled her to apprehend the people responsible for keeping it's existence secret; so if you had never gone digging into that, they could have still managed to keep using it to hurt other people. And also, Quinn and Mallory are doing well, so you'll be glad to hear that. They are both eternally grateful to you for bringing them back together. If you ever doubted making that journey, don't; Mallory would never have lived if you hadn't.

She chuckled. "Speaking of which, Frey is also doing well, despite missing her mother. Even though Gikan is still serving her sentence, Frey does miss her, and visits often. Although Leethe may see a bit of an early release, due to good behavior. Gikan, however, is still holding onto her anger. You'd think she would have let it go by now, but she's incredibly stubborn. Fortunately, so is Frey; she managed to convince Arla to have the Quessna tribe join the real world, and it's going smoothly. The genetic damage has been repaired among many of the women, and despite some... misunderstandings, quite a few of the Quessna warriors are finding normal relationships with men."

She chuckled at a memory of a video Frey had sent her once, of how heavy-handed the initial courting attempts of some of the women were; it conjured up her mind a vision of a cave woman clubbing a man over the head and dragging him back to a cave. There was apparently quite a bit of learning that needed to be done.

Nanoha shook her head. "I'm sorry, my mind drifted there. I just... I have so much I want to tell you, about how I feel, both back then and right now. A part of me hates that I never said what I truly felt when I had the chance, and I suppose it will always be a regret. I just miss you so much, and I ache whenever I think of you. But don't worry, I'm not going to do anything stupid; I know you'd never forgive me if I did. I have to live, not only for our son, whom I treasure so much, but for Vivio, Fate, and all our friends.

A smile slowly formed on her lips as she raised her right hand and placed it on her heart. "But no matter what, you'll always have a place here. And I'll never forget you, Yuuno Scrya. I'll visit as often as need be, so you don't get lonely."

She blinked her eyes at the wetness she suddenly noticed, then finally leaned down and placed the bouquet of flowers on the tombstone, next to the lit incense candle. Satisfied, as if a great weight had been lifted off her shoulders, she turned to see Fate standing there, not even realizing the other woman had crept up.

"I'm ready to go," Nanoha declared, wiping her eyes. "Yuuno-kun wouldn't want me to stay sad forever."

Fate crossed the short distance and hugged the other woman. "I know; he was my friend, too. I cared about him just as much."

Nanoha squeezed the other woman tightly. "And if there's one thing my experience with him taught me, was that sometimes you shouldn't wait to say what you need to. You've been there for me, for a long time. Not just through what happened last year and my pregnancy, but before that as well." She took a deep breath. "I just want to tell you-"

"Shh, it's okay, I know," Fate replied, interrupting her. "Me, too."

Nanoha squeezed the other woman tightly, knowing everything would be alright now; she had been hurt, but she knew she had the strength to live now.

Xx~~*~~xX

I remember you mentioning at one point that you were considering killing off Yuuno very early on in the story process. Interesting to see you decided to go through with it.

[Nanya01]

Originally Posted by Kaijo

Unexpected Expectations

Chapter 12: Acceptance

Previous chapters can be found here.

Spoiler for Unexpected Expectations, Chapter 12: Acceptance:

Unexpected Expectations
Chapter 12: Acceptance

Xx~~*~~xX

The rain pounded hard against the rooftop, echoing inside the chapel but going mostly unnoticed by those inside; their attention was focused forward, on the woman who had just stepped up to speak.

"We're all here for a single purpose," Fate solemnly told the assembly. "To honor the memory of one who gave his life in the line of duty. All of us here know of Yuuno Scyra, and most have worked with him in various capacities. I'd like to say my first memories of him were pleasant, but at the time, he was just another another enemy. A discovery of his would intertwine our lives in a way I would never be able to foresee; and in time, it brought us all together. Somehow or another, he touched each of our lives in special ways."

She paused, and even though Nanoha had her head bowed to try and hide her tears from where she sat in the front row and leaning into her mother's one-armed hug, she knew Fate was looking at her. That she was crying at all was an improvement, compared to the zombie-like state of the past week. In her mind, she could still see Yuuno teleporting in front of her, the spear plunging into his body, telling her to live, and then falling to his death. The shock had been too much and sent her into a catatonic state after.

"He always had a way of doing just what we needed at the time, silently supporting us from the background," Fate continued. "His presence wasn't all that strong or forceful, and sometimes you might even have forgotten he was there; and yet his loss lays bear the huge truth of the large part he played. For in all he did, he was always thinking of other people and how he could help them, rarely giving a thought to his own feelings."

For the thousandth time, Nanoha lifted her hand under her black veil, to wipe her eyes with another dampening handkerchief. She had promised herself she wouldn't cry during this and to save her tears for afterward, but it was no use; the tears just wouldn't stop. She leaned a bit more into her mother as the arm around her shoulders gave her a comforting squeeze, and briefly raised her head to see the picture of Yuuno's smiling face in the photo frame, surrounded by flowers in front of the podium, just above the half-open casket that contained his body.

No....

Fate took a small pause as she gazed around at all the solemn faces, then resumed. "But even though he's no longer physically among us, his memory will always remain. He's left behind a piece of himself within all of us, and as long as we remember that, he'll always be here."

Nanoha's hand went to her stomach, now showing a bit of a bulge. Fate's words applied more literally to her, for even though the act that created it was mired in intense feelings and unusual circumstances, the baby within her was truly the best legacy he could have left. Thus, she knew she had to be strong, so the child could grow up and ultimately know what a good man his or her father was.

"There is so much more I... find myself wanting to say," Fate said, her head lowering as she grasped the sides of the podium, her voice cracking slightly. "I could go on for hours about what's he done. But I'll just say that, even though Arf was always with me, and Nanoha was my first real friend... where I am today is in large part to him. He was, and always will be... my friend."

This can't be happening....

As Fate's voice cracked a bit at the last line, Nanoha felt a gusher of emotion well up inside, despite thinking she finally had it under control. She nearly hiccuped, as her silent tears threatened to come out in full force once more; Yuuno's death was affecting Fate almost as strongly, and yet she seem to be able to compose herself.

[Yuuno, why?] the thought came over and over to her again, among other questions that would forever lack answers. [Why couldn't we just work things out? Why do we say things after a death, that we are too stubborn and pigheaded to say in life? Why did all this have to happen? Why couldn't I have been stronger? If I was, none of this would have happened!]

"Thank you all for coming," Fate offered in closing. "Wherever he is now, Yuuno would be overjoyed to know he had so many who cared."

This isn't the way it should be!

The short service ended and Nanoha realized what came next, although she was fearful; viewing the body. She knew everyone else was waiting on her to go first, milling out into the reception area to politely give her time and space. She was grateful for that and to her mom as well, who said nothing, but merely remained at her side, arm around her shoulders. It was a silent strength she was offering, giving her daughter all the time she needed, letting her know she wasn't alone.

Fate came around to sit on Nanoha's left, taking her left hand and giving it a gentle squeeze, smiling gently as Nanoha looked up. She realized then, that she wasn't being her normal self, someone who was strong in the face of adversity, but instead letting her emotions overwhelmingly control her and force her into weakness. She had to be strong, for Yuuno; she could do this. Somehow, that seemed to work, and she stood and crossed over to the half-open casket.

He looked peaceful, she decided, as if in sleep; albeit one from which he would never again awaken. Where he would never smile at her again, or share a meal and light-hearted conversation with. She reached out to light brush the hair above his forehead, as if to really confirm that he was gone; that he wouldn't suddenly spring up and inform her that it was all a joke.

But it wasn't a joke; he was gone.

NO!

x~~*~~x

As Yuuno began to fall face-forward off the catwalk, time slowed to standstill, and a pain like no other welled up from inside, turning into a scream as she tried to reach for him.

"YUUNO!"

And she remembered.

x~~*~~x

She felt him pull back a bit, as one arm dropped. "No, it's okay, really. Although sometimes I wish things could be undone, I can... what's that?"

Yuuno had pulled a small, black rectangular box-like object out of his pocket, his gaze turning serious, while his face became full of concern. "There is a way..."

More curious that anything, Nanoha studied the small object. "A way? What do you mean?"

He stepped forward, raising the object to her head. "A way to erase your memory of the incident, so you can live normally again. You won't have to suffer."

The idea surprised her, but it was also somehow appealing; if she didn't remember what happened, she'd no longer be afraid. She really could go back to being herself. The event had taken something from her, leaving a hollow void behind; she didn't feel like Nanoha anymore, and she could admit hating it. The fear, the uncertainty, the way her emotions and body would overreact at the smallest thing.

But then his hand dropped, his head lowered. "I can't do it. I thought I could. Erase your memories so that you'd be happy, but I realize now I'm really doing it for me, to erase my own guilt. I wasn't taking your feelings into consideration. Fate was right."

"Yuuno-kun?" Nanoha questioned, shocked at the amount of guilt and grief nakedly displayed on his face; it only increased her own heartache at what they had both been through.

"I..." his voice quivered a bit, and she could see the conflict within him. "I just want you to be happy."

"It's okay," she soothed. “I understand.”

And she did, as she reached out to take his wrist, the one that held the object and raised it back up. She could feel the sorrow within him, that he really was thinking of her the entire time, even if he went about it the wrong way. But now she could be strong for him, and do something to ease his pain like she had done over a month ago.

"Do it," she told him. "If you think you can. This is hurting us both, and not a day goes by when I hate how I've become, wishing I could be back to normal. And then we can both put this behind us."

His eyes were wide as he stared at her, his hand hovering in mid-air, hesitant, and disbelieving. His mouth opened seemingly to speak, but no sound came out.

"Yuuno..." she called lightly, willing her feelings across. "It's okay."

He nodded, then reached over to place the object against her forward, ad she closed her eyes, her thoughts going a million miles per second. It was cool against her skin, but warming up, and suddenly she realized something important.

Her eyes flashed open and she started to tell him... and then a blinding white light filled her vision, and she could no longer remember what she was going to say.

x~~*~~x

[It was my fault!] she realized with anguish as she leaned after him, his body still just out of reach. [If I had just been strong enough...!]

"NO!" she cried as time seemed to return to normal.

She leapt off the catwalk after him, feeling a strange sort of strength welling inside while raising her glowing right hand to her neck, a small blast of magic being just enough to break the collar. With that limitation gone, she grabbed his body with her other arm and slowed their fall, floating down to the ground below.

"It's alright, Yuuno, I'll save you!" she called fracntically, breaking off the spear end protruding from his backside so she could lay him down. "Just don't die on me!"

Some part of her mind noted noises outside and the sound of doors opening, but her focus was on the man before her; she pulled off her sweater, using it to staunch the blood-flow on his chest, but she noted it was very close to his heart and there was a lot of blood already. Still, she could see his chest rise and fall ever so slightly, so he had to still be alive.

He just had to be!

"You're under arrest!" Signum's voice announced. "Disarm and you'll be granted the chance to defend yourself in a court of law."

"That... male..." Leethe said, surprise in her voice as her swords clattered to the ground and vanished.. "He gave his life for her...."

"Nanoha?"

Her head came up. "Hayate? Shamal! Help me! Help Yuuno!"

The two women leaned down on the other side of the body as Shamal placed her right hand on the body, her rings flaring with green light, and a holographic window opening nearby displaying his vitals. Nanoha didn't understand much of the medical display, but her body went cold as she recognized the line reserved to measure heart rate.

It was a flat line.

"Nanoha, what happened here?" Hayate asked. "We got word that Yuuno had broken in and stolen a lost logia from the vault. It was only through the tracking spell put on all of them, that we managed to find you guys."

"He had to," Nanoha replied, her voice breaking at the sight of his now-pale skin and the fact that she couldn't tell anymore if he was breathing. "To save us. Shamal? Please tell me he'll be alright!"

"He's suffered a lot of damage prior to the obvious chest wound," the Belkan Doctor explained, her voice hesitant. "There was internal bleeding and hemorrhaging, too. Broken ribs, fractured skull, no heart beat.... oh no..."

The doctor's hand froze over his heart, right next to the ice spear, and her eyes closed. When they opened, Shamal slowly pulled her hand from Yuuno, to which Nanoha raised her head and met the other woman's sorrowful eyes, her heart breaking as Shamal sadly shook her head and uttered the words.

"I'm sorry, Nanoha."

Her vision blurry, Nanoha barely saw Hayate shift to her side and grab her in a hug, as the former-amnesiac descended into tears.

x~~*~~x

"We're home!" Nanoha called.

Fate lifted her head from the kitchen as the pair entered the living room. "Welcome back! How did it go?"

Nanoha gestured to the person in the wheelchair she was pushing. "Aina's physical therapy lessons are coming along nicely. It shouldn't be too much longer until she can walk again."

The housemaid blushed. "I really don't think I'm making much progress, but it's kind of you to say so. I'm just grateful you're giving me a place to stay."

"Well, ever since you came out of your coma 3 months ago, you needed some place to stay," Nanoha told her pointedly, placing a hand on the woman's shoulder. "And as far as I'm concerned, you're family!"

Fate smiled as Aina patted the hand gratefully, then snapped her fingers. "Oh, I received a letter from Quin, Mallory, and Frey earlier. The transition is going good back on their planet. Even though there have been some rough spots, the Quessna tribe is reintegrating well with the other villages. Arla has been surprisingly more pragmatic about the tribe's survival."

"That's good to hear; I'm happy for them," Nanoha replied, looking around. "By the way, where is Yuuno?"

"Oh, he's asleep in his room," Fate informed her. "He had a bit of a rough day."

Nanoha nodded and smiled. "I think I want to peek in on him; can you take care of Aina for me, for a bit?"

As soon as Fate gave her assent, Nanoha headed back to the hall and went upstairs, finding the bedroom labeled "Yuuno" and slowly opening the door as quietly as she could, so as to not wake him. It appeared to go successfully, as she gently tiptoed over and gazed down at his lovely, sleeping face. He was so peaceful, and it was moments like these that made her heart melt and strengthen her will to live.

And then his eyes fluttered open and saw her, and began to cry.

Nanoha sighed as she reached in and picked him up. "Oh, I should have figured you'd do this to me. You probably sensed me come in. Let me guess; someone is hungry?"

As she gently held her 4-month-old son against her shoulder and rubbed his back, the crying continued, and Nanoha realized it would take too long to prepare a bottle and thus retired to the rocking chair in the corner. Yuuno continued to cry and paw at her chest as she lowered him.

"Hold on, hold on, mama will feed you in a bit," she cooed, which seemed to soothe him as she raised her shirt with her free hand.

In moments, she had him in place, and felt oddly at peace as her son suckled. There had been many times when she wondered if this was worth it, and yet now, at this very moment, she knew it was. She couldn't imagine life without him.

After several minutes, Fate peeked her head in through the door, into the darkened room, and smiled. "I wondered what was keeping you; I should have figured." She crept in and closed the door behind her to keep the room dark. "He had been asleep for a few hours, so I suppose I should have expected he'd be up soon and want to be fed. I should have prepared a bottle; I'm sorry."

"Don't be silly," Nanoha chided her, as the other woman sat down in a reclining chair next to her. "You do a lot for Vivio, Yuuno, and I already. You've always done a lot for us; I'm really glad you're here."

"I'm glad to be here," Fate admitted, reaching across to gently squeeze Nanoha's arm. "Aina is resting in her room for now, watching her shows, so we have some time before dinner." She paused, and Nanoha sensed the other woman's gaze on her. "Are you planning on going to visit him?"

Nanoha was silent for a minute, before looking down at her son and nodded, whispering, "Yes. It's our 1-year anniversary, after all."

x~~*~~x

"Hello, Yuuno, it's been awhile," Nanoha greeted, then held up her hand. "No, don't say anything; I have a lot to tell you. I know I haven't visited as often as I should have, but I'm here now. I'm doing well, as is your son, so don't worry about that. We're all doing the best we can, so you can rest easy, and be proud of us.

She paused, reaching up to wipe a tear from her eye. "It's funny; I could have sworn I had more to say, but standing here right now, I just can't find the words. Oh! Hayate's investigation into the Procreat enabled her to apprehend the people responsible for keeping it's existence secret; so if you had never gone digging into that, they could have still managed to keep using it to hurt other people. And also, Quinn and Mallory are doing well, so you'll be glad to hear that. They are both eternally grateful to you for bringing them back together. If you ever doubted making that journey, don't; Mallory would never have lived if you hadn't.

She chuckled. "Speaking of which, Frey is also doing well, despite missing her mother. Even though Gikan is still serving her sentence, Frey does miss her, and visits often. Although Leethe may see a bit of an early release, due to good behavior. Gikan, however, is still holding onto her anger. You'd think she would have let it go by now, but she's incredibly stubborn. Fortunately, so is Frey; she managed to convince Arla to have the Quessna tribe join the real world, and it's going smoothly. The genetic damage has been repaired among many of the women, and despite some... misunderstandings, quite a few of the Quessna warriors are finding normal relationships with men."

She chuckled at a memory of a video Frey had sent her once, of how heavy-handed the initial courting attempts of some of the women were; it conjured up her mind a vision of a cave woman clubbing a man over the head and dragging him back to a cave. There was apparently quite a bit of learning that needed to be done.

Nanoha shook her head. "I'm sorry, my mind drifted there. I just... I have so much I want to tell you, about how I feel, both back then and right now. A part of me hates that I never said what I truly felt when I had the chance, and I suppose it will always be a regret. I just miss you so much, and I ache whenever I think of you. But don't worry, I'm not going to do anything stupid; I know you'd never forgive me if I did. I have to live, not only for our son, whom I treasure so much, but for Vivio, Fate, and all our friends.

A smile slowly formed on her lips as she raised her right hand and placed it on her heart. "But no matter what, you'll always have a place here. And I'll never forget you, Yuuno Scrya. I'll visit as often as need be, so you don't get lonely."

She blinked her eyes at the wetness she suddenly noticed, then finally leaned down and placed the bouquet of flowers on the tombstone, next to the lit incense candle. Satisfied, as if a great weight had been lifted off her shoulders, she turned to see Fate standing there, not even realizing the other woman had crept up.

"I'm ready to go," Nanoha declared, wiping her eyes. "Yuuno-kun wouldn't want me to stay sad forever."

Fate crossed the short distance and hugged the other woman. "I know; he was my friend, too. I cared about him just as much."

Nanoha squeezed the other woman tightly. "And if there's one thing my experience with him taught me, was that sometimes you shouldn't wait to say what you need to. You've been there for me, for a long time. Not just through what happened last year and my pregnancy, but before that as well." She took a deep breath. "I just want to tell you-"

"Shh, it's okay, I know," Fate replied, interrupting her. "Me, too."

Nanoha squeezed the other woman tightly, knowing everything would be alright now; she had been hurt, but she knew she had the strength to live now.

Xx~~*~~xX

I should be in bed. But I just checked to see if anything was good around here and this was here.

Wow, kinda surprised you killed him. Makes me sad that that happened, but considering the abuse he took in the story, I guess it was only to be expected in the end, huh?

Still, not going to complain about the ending, it was bitter-sweet and was well-done. Good job.

[deathcurse]

Daily Activity Log of Officers F. Testarossa and N. Takamachi

I know it's been a while, and I apologize, but I've just posted Log #11, Jan. 6, Stalker on Fanfiction.net .

RB and I are working on a new Log, but I've been side-tracked by Crime Never Sleeps, so pardon the delay!