AnimeSuki Forums

Register Forum Rules FAQ Members List Social Groups Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Go Back   AnimeSuki Forum > Anime Discussion > Older Series > Retired > Retired A-L > Infinite Stratos

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 2016-06-14, 07:01   Link #58661
Fireminer
Lumine Passio
*Author
 
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Hanoi, Vietnam
Age: 12
Quote:
Originally Posted by DarkJak2050 View Post


Why do I even bother posting possible material for my fic on here if I don't get any response. Let alone help!
Share your sentiment, brother. Lately the thread has been really in the grave.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DarkJak2050 View Post
Okay, I was going to post something before but I need a visual aid to help explain. Well, at one point in my fic, I plan to show my guys when they were in their basic training for their mercenary unit. Here's a part where my guys are reminded to never disrespect their enemy's motive. Put them in the same position as those Marines in training.

More of these will be posted later, but any thoughts on this one?
Ok, I'd say that it's a good start - I can imagine most "real" seargent worth his salt would say stuffs like that.
Fireminer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-15, 11:47   Link #58662
Tempest35
Awe of She
*Author
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Orlando
Not so much disrespect their motive, as in respect their willingness to fight for their cause. One can disrespect/downgrade anyone's motive for anything. Motives are subjective to whichever side of the fence you're on, but one's resolve is neither right or wrong - it just is.

1. resoluteness, firmness, firmness of purpose, resolve, resolution, trait
usage:
the trait of being resolute; "his resoluteness carried him through the battle"; "it was his unshakeable resolution to finish the work"
__________________
"Focus entirely on me, you ordinary soldier."
Tempest35 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-17, 03:51   Link #58663
Fireminer
Lumine Passio
*Author
 
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Hanoi, Vietnam
Age: 12
Quote:
Two men. One table. Bottles and cans and cups that left no doubt about their intoxicating contents. And a colorful assortment of slurs, jeers, swears, curses, and slangs spoken in so disoriented voices that an outsider might very well thought he had been listening to Hebrew.
“‘re you sure we should let that guy stay with de boy, boss? I know a waco when I see ‘im.” Said the underling to his leader. Something must had been bothering him a lot, for his fingers nervously fidgeting under the table.
The boss, a man with no less than three scars and two missing fingers on his hands, answered after he had finished the cheap bourbon in one gulp – this was the first time alcohol tasted so bitter to him:
“He pays us. Ad…” The empty bottle landed unceremoniously on the sofa across the room. “…U’re right. Guy IS a waco. Better not to disturb ‘im.”’
Despite what he said, his face all seemed guilty when he mentioned their “contract” – the boy. They had been paid in advance to kidnap a kid on his way home from school, under the observation of “the waco” who hired them. At first, they thought it was such a clean and simple job, but, after witnessing their… eccentric client, they now feared much for the boy.
After all, these men prized themselves as “proud and honest laborers” that went into the business for a righteous vengeance against the cruel world.
The drinking continued. The smaller one of the two, the underling, sipped his beer while from time to time, wandering his eyes the closed door to the next room. And the other guy, the boss, having his drink and cursing almost everything in return and crushing the empty cans with his bare hands.
The wild mix of beer and alcohol induced the men into a state of the most terrible of lethargies. Cans after cans, they became more and more drunken until the more the boss slurred in a smoldering rage:
“Wat hell iz happening now? Kidnapping a child? Taking ordr from a freaking foreign-er? W-What ‘re e now?” He tried to open another can, but his hands were so shaken that beer spilled all over onto his shirt.
His drink partner grumbled something like “Damn it all!” and then spoke in a, suprising enough, sober and somewhat sarcastic tone:
“Can’t help iz, boss. We’re short on cash. My wife threatened to kick me out of her house if I don’t pay for that brat’s school… And u’ve dozen colectors following you lately, ye?”
“Uh huh. I’d willinly lost an arm to ‘scape those damn dogs!”
“U’d need more han an arm to them… Probably a kidney of you’s. Or the liver.”
“Ugh… Shut ‘he fuck up, trap! ”
---
In the next room…
Ichika’s eyes snapped open the moment the blindfold was took away. However, long period in the dark had made the boy temporary blind, so he tried to reach out and feel with his hands. He, however, couldn’t swung his arms forward.
An obnoxious smell forced its way into his nostrils: The sourest sweet, the cheapest deodorant, the foulest cigarette, and a stench which took a while for Ichika to remember its meaning: blood.
It took a while for the child to realize that he was being held captive in a tiny, window-less room, with a small fluorescence lamp as the only available light source.
Where is him, What is he doing here, and questions of so overloaded his young mind. Fear gripped his heart, making it painful to even to breath. By instinct, Ichika opened his mouth to call for his sister.
“I wouldn’t do that if I were you, boy.” His neck met with the cold steel of a knife. Its owner, his captor, said in a deep, baritone voice. Ichika began to struggle violently, but the binds around his arms and legs were so constricted that the boy fell and rolled on the floor.
The man forcefully grabbed the little boy by his collar and returned him to his previous position, which was, sitting with arms behind his back and legs folded into a kneeling position. It felt like an electric current had just ran from his foot, up the spine, and directly into the brain.
“Do you under stand English?” Ichika squirmed, but he did not answer. “Do-you-understand-English?”
He didn’t like it one bit when the man looked directly into his eyes. It terrified him, the glimpse of madness within those irises of the man. And so, fear made the boy nodded. In the dim light, these slits on his mask seemed to be glowing.
“Good. If you keep quiet and be a nice boy, then you will meet your sister again in no time. If you don’t, then… I don’t reward naughty children.” To further emphasize his question, he slightly ran the jagged edge of the combat knife on Ichika’s throat.
After a minute without further response from the boy, his captor went back to his seat right by the door. He then casually picked up one of the magazines from the rack and flicked through its contents, humming an obsolence tune that resembled a nightingale’s.
And for Ichika, he had stopped squirming while his mind began to roll again. He then remembered one of the TV show that told children how to act when they are kidnapped: It was better for him to stay still and wait for rescue instead of provoking the kidnappers. He began studying the surrounding with his ears, trying to listen to whatever sign may help him to escape later.
Broken bottles, dirty clothes, empty take-out cartons littered the floor, but it looked like that they had just been swept into the sides for a clean corner for the man to sit. Then there were only the empty table, the chair that the man occupied, and a table lamp – beside those, the room lacked any decorative touch... That was, if you didn’t count smears of red on the wall.
In contrast to the unkempt surrounding, the man stood with his theatrical outfit stood out like a cactus growing on mold. The crying man mask, the velvet jacket and checkered pants, the pot hat, the golden pocket watch hanging on a golden chain, and the polished pair of oxford. Nevertheless, he was not a clown, as the Hi-Power on the two sides of his hip would gladly remind you.
Here, Ichika had no idea where, or more exactly which floors he was in. The boy took a guessed, correctly, that he was in some kind of apartment. So maybe he could run down and call for help?
That is if he can get past the guard.
“You have eyes just like your sister’s.” Commented the man without tearing his eyes away from the magazine. “Defiance. Utterly so…
“A coyote. Freedom or death...”
“Boy, a friendly advice: Be strong, or one day you’re going to get killed because of those eyes.”
--
“Hey, boss, don’t u think it’s too quiet. Better I chez what’s goin’ on?”
The underling groggingly woke up from his dreamless slumber on the table. Somehow, during sleeping, ants by the dozens had crawled upon the sleeves of his coat, which was stained with whiskey.
“Why bother? With that much cash ze payed us, the boy must be ery valuable. Ze wouldn’t dare to do anything… And it iz dawn now. Ze deal ends today. We get our cuts, and zhen get the ell out of this shithole.
Through the dirty glass and ragged curtains, several rays of light passed through and shone upon the faces of the criminal: Their unshaved beards, after an all-night boozing, growled like thorns on the cleft chins. Puffed and beat red were their lips, because of drinking and because they unconsciously bit themselves with jagged tooth. The man squirmed their eyes like shrews to the slightest of light.
“U go close that curtain.” – “Zes, boss.” The underling staggered to the window, but the moment he grabbed onto the rag, the window was shattered and glass flew all over the place.
“What ze…” Before he could react, a hand went straight for his throat, dragged him out the window. The underling was then thrown head first from the sixth floor of the apartment building.
What he saw last was a person wearing all-black, visibly armed with blades. What he said last was a terrified scream that end in half a second.
But it was still better than his boss – the thug died with a throwing knife plunged in his throat. The blood trickled down on his arm and dripped into the loosely-held revolver still in its holster.
--
“It’s time to wake up, boy. Your sister’s here.”
Less than a second after the man finished the sentence were the door blown into splinters. In the hazy smoke of the explosion stood an imposing figure, sword in hand stopped at the chin of the man.
What stopped the katana? The two pistols: one aimed at the attacker at point-blank range, and the other for Ichika who was immobilized on the ground.
“Tch-d. Have you got no courtesy? To think how many times I’ve tried to teach ettiques to your violent mind.” Said the man, pompously. His hat had been blown away by the explosion, revealing a well-cut hair, dotted with some grey strands.
“…”
In contrast with the masked figure’s laid-back posture, the woman was as tense as a bowstring, with every fiber of her being on edge. The katana rested on the neck of the kidnapper. Just a little more force to behead the man. She too concealed her face like the man, however, one might had guessed an expression of utmost hatred behind that black scarf.
“Ummm! Ummm!”
Ichika recognized his sister immediately. That stance, one of those that Chifuyu-nee never taught his brother and only showed to her kendo master, always in a fierce spar. What the young woman was wearing was a form-fitting body suit, seemed to have been made with synthetic materials, and had a belt which holds several knives and the scabbard of the sword in her hand.
That sword vibrated a little as its owner’s eyes met with her little brother’s. Never had before Ichika felt that much fear toward his own sister.
“Chifuyu Orimura. My most talented protégé. The sharpest sword on the rack.” Blood dripped down on the edge of the blade, making droplets on the tip. “Be careful with your emotion, will you. That said…”
“Why don’t you show your face to your brother over there? That boy’s braver than you think. I’m sure that he can take the truth of her sister well enough.”
“… I have no need to reveal myself to a death man. This will be fast.”
“Indeed it will. While I’d love nothing more than to have a chat, but duty calling!” Fingers tight on the triggers, he squeezed…
“Ichika. Close your eyes…”
*BANG!*
The prologue for my story. Any objection?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tempest35 View Post
Not so much disrespect their motive, as in respect their willingness to fight for their cause. One can disrespect/downgrade anyone's motive for anything. Motives are subjective to whichever side of the fence you're on, but one's resolve is neither right or wrong - it just is.

1. resoluteness, firmness, firmness of purpose, resolve, resolution, trait
usage:
the trait of being resolute; "his resoluteness carried him through the battle"; "it was his unshakeable resolution to finish the work"
Then again, what we really see in the video is the denying of one's delusion - hardly anything worth debate.

Last edited by Fireminer; 2016-06-17 at 07:12.
Fireminer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-17, 19:48   Link #58664
blitz1/2
Tenshi's Defense Squadron
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Fighting against those who oppress the system
I sent my twincest lemon for Tempest to edit. Hopefully, once it's done, it will be at fanfiction.net. Viva the wincest!
__________________

hai, hai. Onii-chan has his work cut out for him.
blitz1/2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-18, 04:55   Link #58665
Fireminer
Lumine Passio
*Author
 
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Hanoi, Vietnam
Age: 12
Hey, does anyone here think that I've got the curse of Low View Count? Whether it is my fics, my youtube videos, even my wargame ideas attract so little reply.
Fireminer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-18, 07:39   Link #58666
blitz1/2
Tenshi's Defense Squadron
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Fighting against those who oppress the system
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fireminer View Post
Hey, does anyone here think that I've got the curse of Low View Count? Whether it is my fics, my youtube videos, even my wargame ideas attract so little reply.
Happens to me too. It just doesn't "attract" the majority of the attention for some reason.
__________________

hai, hai. Onii-chan has his work cut out for him.
blitz1/2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-18, 07:43   Link #58667
DarkJak2050
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fireminer View Post
Hey, does anyone here think that I've got the curse of Low View Count? Whether it is my fics, my youtube videos, even my wargame ideas attract so little reply.
Quote:
Originally Posted by blitz1/2 View Post
Happens to me too. It just doesn't "attract" the majority of the attention for some reason.
Join the club...

I would read that what you posted right now, Fire. But I need to get some sleep.
DarkJak2050 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-18, 11:42   Link #58668
Tempest35
Awe of She
*Author
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Orlando
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fireminer View Post
The prologue for my story. Any objection?
Is the audience suppose to guess the nationality of the kidnappers from their speech patterns? I'm guessing probably not, eh - it might be better just to give an approximation of the accent that they have and not worry too much about re-creating it in the story. All in all, it's just a bonus point, not a main point of the narrative. That is unless that particular speech pattern is an actual plot point for later - as in Ichika or Chifuyu can pick out that man's voice from across a busy street (exaggeration here but you get my meaning hopefully).

It seems a little sparse on the descriptive side of things. However, if the room is already dark, that can be an in-story reason for the lack of details.

Still, what's here is good enough for a skeleton - now to add on more meat.
__________________
"Focus entirely on me, you ordinary soldier."
Tempest35 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-18, 21:02   Link #58669
Fireminer
Lumine Passio
*Author
 
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Hanoi, Vietnam
Age: 12
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tempest35 View Post
Is the audience suppose to guess the nationality of the kidnappers from their speech patterns? I'm guessing probably not, eh - it might be better just to give an approximation of the accent that they have and not worry too much about re-creating it in the story. All in all, it's just a bonus point, not a main point of the narrative. That is unless that particular speech pattern is an actual plot point for later - as in Ichika or Chifuyu can pick out that man's voice from across a busy street (exaggeration here but you get my meaning hopefully).

It seems a little sparse on the descriptive side of things. However, if the room is already dark, that can be an in-story reason for the lack of details.

Still, what's here is good enough for a skeleton - now to add on more meat.
Thanks! Always appreciate your opinions, Tempest.
Fireminer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-19, 04:12   Link #58670
wavehawk
Some say I'm the Reverse
 
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Hmmm...here's an idea for a bad fic. In which someone swaps out Ichika's cooking oil for liquid detergent...

http://en.rocketnews24.com/2016/06/1...eir-doughnuts/
wavehawk is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-19, 09:05   Link #58671
ZeroXSEED
I am no one
 
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
Ugh why is the thread empty whenever I came
__________________
My OTP is fucked up as expected
ZeroXSEED is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-19, 10:17   Link #58672
Tempest35
Awe of She
*Author
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Orlando
Dunno - might be that your sense of timing is off again.

So, do you think that in IS that someone, somewhere might have tried to do away with Father's Day?

Hnnn, now I'm thinking of a character study with each of the girls in regards to their fathers. Aside for Rin, I think both she and Houki have the most stable homes out of the girls.

- Laura doesn't know what a father does and she probably doesn't care to know unless it involves Ichika in some fashion.

- Charl would have her ideal vision of a father but she might feel disillusioned because of her actual relationship with him

- I have a feeling that Rin still adores her dad deep down. She's a Daddy's tomboy through and through so it wouldn't surprise me one bit.

- Houki is grumpyface.jpg with everyone but she probably has the most normal house out of everyone, barring Tabane. Houki 'hates' her sister, not her parents and going off her vision of how she and Ichika were in World Purge, she might be the most even keel about it.

- Not even gonna touch on the Tatenashi sisters. Honestly, the two would have been born directly from the IS and it wouldn't change their back story much.
__________________
"Focus entirely on me, you ordinary soldier."
Tempest35 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-19, 10:21   Link #58673
ZeroXSEED
I am no one
 
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
True enough

I haven't really keeping up with Canon because V9 totally kill my interest, but when I get my shit sorted I'll come back here even if I.S. fandom almost extinct.
__________________
My OTP is fucked up as expected
ZeroXSEED is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-19, 10:27   Link #58674
blitz1/2
Tenshi's Defense Squadron
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Fighting against those who oppress the system
Quote:
Originally Posted by wavehawk View Post
Hmmm...here's an idea for a bad fic. In which someone swaps out Ichika's cooking oil for liquid detergent...

http://en.rocketnews24.com/2016/06/1...eir-doughnuts/
That sounds like something from Drabbles from the Orimura rather than Ichika doing it.
__________________

hai, hai. Onii-chan has his work cut out for him.
blitz1/2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-19, 10:30   Link #58675
ZeroXSEED
I am no one
 
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
Sounds like what Cecilia would do rather.

I mean "Detergent gives a nice scent" is exactly her type of reasoning...
__________________
My OTP is fucked up as expected
ZeroXSEED is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-19, 10:42   Link #58676
Tempest35
Awe of She
*Author
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Orlando
Cecilia: "But I wanted the cookies to have a 'Spring Meadow' scent to them."

Rin: "BAKA!! If cookies don't smell like cookies, then THEY ARE NOT COOKIES!!!"

Ichika: "Somehow, this sounds familiar..."

Chifuyu: "Shut up - that was salt with sugar in my case...!"

!*!

As for the Light Novels - I kinda want to forget volume 9 except for some key points but Vol 10 has me raring to go. Chifuyu vs Madoka and then Ichika's Oneechan Onsen Special...
I'm so easy to please - give me a scene with Chifuyu in it and I'm happy.
__________________
"Focus entirely on me, you ordinary soldier."
Tempest35 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-19, 10:53   Link #58677
ZeroXSEED
I am no one
 
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
Well at least you HAVE priorities set
__________________
My OTP is fucked up as expected
ZeroXSEED is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-19, 13:17   Link #58678
Oslight
.
*Scanlator
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tempest35 View Post
Cecilia: "But I wanted the cookies to have a 'Spring Meadow' scent to them."

Rin: "BAKA!! If cookies don't smell like cookies, then THEY ARE NOT COOKIES!!!"

Ichika: "Somehow, this sounds familiar..."

Chifuyu: "Shut up - that was salt with sugar in my case...!"

!*!

As for the Light Novels - I kinda want to forget volume 9 except for some key points but Vol 10 has me raring to go. Chifuyu vs Madoka and then Ichika's Oneechan Onsen Special...
I'm so easy to please - give me a scene with Chifuyu in it and I'm happy.
Spoiler for A small snippet of the hot spring part of Volume 10:

Last edited by Oslight; 2016-06-19 at 14:16.
Oslight is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-19, 13:53   Link #58679
lovetospoon73
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Quote:
Originally Posted by Oslight View Post
Spoiler for A small snippet of the hot spring part of Volume 10:
where did u get that?
lovetospoon73 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2016-06-19, 13:54   Link #58680
Oslight
.
*Scanlator
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovetospoon73 View Post
where did u get that?
I translated it myself.
Oslight is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
fanfic ideas, fanfiction, ff.net, harem, is fanfic, warning fanfic spoilers, wincest

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:44.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
We use Silk.