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Old 2009-07-11, 15:35   Link #14261
Nanya01
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nanya01 View Post
Aww... But, it's so much fun! And not *that* hard to do...

Spoiler for Hell Loop:
Well, I decided to add to that while I'm off of work right now... I've got more for later...

Spoiler for First day of training:


Two page claims in a row? More looping madness!
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Old 2009-07-11, 15:45   Link #14262
Jimmy C
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DezoPenguin View Post
It's a buster-type spell, not an independent projectile. He's actually blasting the spell the entire time that it's in effect. If he stopped to run, the spell would stop, too.
For a guy who plans ahead, that sounds even dumber. He's doing something, in the middle of a battle, that isn't improving his odds at all. It's just a Futile Gesture for someone who sees no way out of his predicament.

Quote:
Sorry, no, it's in Chapter 27. That's good, because the Epilogue is kind of crappy.
You didn't have to tell us that now you know. I hope we can help you improve it.

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Originally Posted by DezoPenguin View Post
Blood and Spirit--Chapter 1
Not much to say about this one, except two things. One, N, F and H seperated from Arisa and Suzuka after middle school, not high school. By the time the two of the were old enough to drive, the other three moved to Mid already.
Second, "person gaining magic through vampirism" is an old gimmick... is what I wanted to say. But we don't know if you're going to be using the "gaining magic" part. So, we'll see.
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Old 2009-07-11, 19:47   Link #14263
RadiantBeam
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So, after much agonizing and one of the biggest writer's blocks I've ever encountered, I present to you "Sunrise, part one"!

Spoiler for Sunrise: Part I:


No author's notes this time.

FF.net link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5209703/1/
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Old 2009-07-11, 21:43   Link #14264
spawnofthejudge
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A short based on RadiantBeam's Shadows Arc. A bit rough.

Spoiler for The Deep Shadow of Chrono Harlaown:


Spoiler for Notes:
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Old 2009-07-12, 01:33   Link #14265
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Well, more from the time-looping Subaru who has different trainers.

Boy, I bet she wishes she had her normal ones again.

Spoiler for Aftermath of Training:


Previous points...

Introduction

Training
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Old 2009-07-12, 08:42   Link #14266
Kagerou
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Hi.
So what'd I miss? <3
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Old 2009-07-12, 09:40   Link #14267
Nanya01
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kagerou View Post
Hi.
So what'd I miss? <3
Well, I started time looping insanity...

Vivio doing loops.

If insanity makes any sort of sense...

Um... I have no idea what else you missed.
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Old 2009-07-12, 12:39   Link #14268
Tempy
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Hi.
So what'd I miss? <3
Everything.
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Old 2009-07-12, 12:42   Link #14269
RadiantBeam
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Quote:
Originally Posted by spawnofthejudge View Post
A short based on RadiantBeam's Shadows Arc. A bit rough.

Spoiler for The Deep Shadow of Chrono Harlaown:


Spoiler for Notes:
I saw this in the morning but didn't have a chance to comment, so I will now!

I like it a lot. You did a good job of getting into Chrono's head and how he feels about his job. His justifications for what he does is good enough, but you know deep down that in a way it seems to bother him... especially when Amy spoke to him. A plus on the married couple fluff, too, no one ever gives Amy/Chrono the love it deserves.

Very nice job. I liked it a lot.
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Old 2009-07-12, 12:51   Link #14270
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Quote:
Originally Posted by spawnofthejudge View Post
A short based on RadiantBeam's Shadows Arc. A bit rough.

Spoiler for The Deep Shadow of Chrono Harlaown:


Spoiler for Notes:
Whoa! We're spawning!

Interesting fic. To answer your question, Chrono comes off like he's tired not so much from physical tiredness but in a "symptom-of-depression" kind of tiredness. That is, he's made a decision, and believes it's the right decision, but having to confront the consequences of that decision is taking its toll on him--kind of in the same way, but in a more "wearing away over time" sense that Lutecia did in RadiantBeam's fic, "Shadow."

(I like his response to Amy about his actions in A's. It's not that he necessarily opposed Admiral Graham's plan because torturing a nine-year-old into insanity so that she gets possessed by an ancient artifact, then freezing that artifact into stasis, then pitching said artifact into a rift between dimensions so said girl can be alone in her madness until the end of days is a morally bad thing, but because once he was in the field, the conditions "on the ground" revealed that it was a bad plan not optimized for the highest chances of success--Hayate, Reinforce, and the Wolkenritter didn't operate in the way Graham assumed they would, and Durandal wasn't up to the job they needed it to do.)

I like that Amy, although not privy to the details of particular operations, knows precisely what Chrono's department entails. The wife of the director of the NSA, after all, isn't likely to think her husband's hands are clean and tidy.

I strongly suspect that Hayate knows everything that she wants to know about what the Shadows do, just because she's Hayate. On the other hand, Hayate is not Nanoha; she probably believes that a government the size of the TSAB requires a black-ops division, so her objections would be more likely along the lines of specific, particular decisions ("I'm not arguing that the ends don't sometimes justify the means, Chrono; it's that these particular ends don't justify the precise means uses in this circumstance. You've got another agent there who got too comfortable in the darkness."). I have a feeling her questioning is meant more to keep him honest rather than to make any actual inquiry.

Oh, and is the implication supposed to be that the last report Chrono picked up is the one on Lutecia's frag-up that ended up being the spur for RB's "Shadow"?
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Old 2009-07-12, 14:42   Link #14271
Satashi
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Amber Dreams part 2 is up, click image to read <3 hope you enjoy! Thanks to Angel and Dezo for help and advice

And thanks to Rick for cute artwork :3
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Old 2009-07-12, 21:38   Link #14272
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If anyone was following "I'll take the kids, and you take my heart," I've changed the name to "[M]Other Love" and thrown it up on FF.N.
For anyone following it, I've finally had a moment to hammer out the latest chapter here: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5048263/13/

I wish I could be writing more and maybe I will in a bit, but I'm changing jobs at the moment and where I'm staying currently is not exactly conducive to writing on a truck stop bathroom wall, much less a fic.
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Old 2009-07-12, 22:16   Link #14273
Satashi
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Originally Posted by allquall View Post
if anyone was following "i'll take the kids, and you take my heart," i've changed the name to "[m]other love" and thrown it up on ff.n.
For anyone following it, i've finally had a moment to hammer out the latest chapter here: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5048263/13/

i wish i could be writing more and maybe i will in a bit, but i'm changing jobs at the moment and where i'm staying currently is not exactly conducive to writing on a truck stop bathroom wall, much less a fic.
quall! *loves on!*
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Old 2009-07-12, 22:52   Link #14274
DezoPenguin
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@Allquall: Sorry to hear that you're not able to write as often as you'd like. Good chapter, though! I'm glad that the effort taken earlier to *ahem* befriend Yuuno is paying off.

@Satashi: Wait, there's more to come? This wasn't the last chapter of "Amber Dreams"? And here I thought you'd tied everything up more or less neatly.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DezoPenguin View Post

Spoiler for Magical Detective Sherlock Harlaown:

Nanoha (still grumpy): I suspect the author of screwing up canon by thinking I teach my special magic spells to just anyone!
And now, the answer...though I have a feeling that no one even noticed that I'd posted the question!

Spoiler for The Solution:
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Old 2009-07-12, 22:54   Link #14275
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...

I sense that Teana has some serious blackmail material here in the future, should Fate ever do something that gets on her nerves.

Seriously, I read this and was scratching my head the whole day trying to figure it out. Now I'm annoyed that I missed those clues!
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Old 2009-07-12, 23:47   Link #14276
Satashi
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DezoPenguin View Post
[

@Satashi: Wait, there's more to come? This wasn't the last chapter of "Amber Dreams"? And here I thought you'd tied everything up more or less neatly.
I don't have much left, but it was a nice ending point for the chapter ^_^ the final chapter won't be too long I don't think.
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Old 2009-07-13, 01:37   Link #14277
Nanya01
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I don't have much left, but it was a nice ending point for the chapter ^_^ the final chapter won't be too long I don't think.
So, it's going to be a rather short fic?

Well, I have to say, very emotional chapter. Pretty well written too, didn't notice too any problems with grammar or spelling.

Sad Fate is sad, isn't she?
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Old 2009-07-13, 10:43   Link #14278
Satashi
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nanya01 View Post
So, it's going to be a rather short fic?

Well, I have to say, very emotional chapter. Pretty well written too, didn't notice too any problems with grammar or spelling.

Sad Fate is sad, isn't she?
Short for one of my fics, yeah. It will be around 22k words. Dunno how long other Nanoha fics are.

Dezo and Angel both helped me with the grammar and spelling <3
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Old 2009-07-13, 11:10   Link #14279
DezoPenguin
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Spoiler for Stahlkönigin--Chapter 27:


Spoiler for Notes:


Previously:

Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
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Old 2009-07-13, 12:35   Link #14280
NorthernFallout
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Previous Chapters

Spoiler for Chapter 9 - Crushed Dreams:


And for those who missed it in OCT, parts of the Index has been posted containing a load of info about Cancri, their magic system and the entire world.
It can be found here: http://forums.animesuki.com/showpost...postcount=7435
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