2011-10-07, 08:12 | Link #2341 | |
I am no one
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
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Quote:
(Blitz, I know you have urges to kill me, hold it at least until Sacred Twins finished)
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2011-10-07, 08:21 | Link #2343 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
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@Zero- They saw him take down Karon and he's obviously not completely "all there" since he detonated the power station while it was RIGHT ABOVE HIM! They think he's holding more than a knife and that's why they gang up on him.
Karon's teammates will probably have a 'My God What Have I Done' moment when they realized they just used an IS to maul a kid who had nothing but a knife and some grenades to defend himself. He'll probably experience the side effects of the suit during the combat, at that point he's screwed. I doubt he'd trust Karon after this He was almost about to trust her but her classmates fucked that up This will strain his already low tolerance of IS pilots even further. What Lies In Shadow doesn't refer to just that, it alse refers to the fact that the world may be at peace in their world but the things that lie in the dark can easily change that. I gotta wonder how to get him out of this though, maybe Tatenashi and/or Kyuukai can pull a big damn heroes. @Wavehawk- It's fine with me too, Alternate Character interpretation is fun to do That's what I'm doing to nearly everyone i. My fic |
2011-10-07, 08:26 | Link #2344 | |
I am no one
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
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Quote:
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2011-10-07, 08:32 | Link #2345 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
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@ Zero- Any Ideas on how Irish doesn't get killed by the constant bombardment? My plan so far is that he grabs onto one of the units, stabs through the shield and grabs the pilot to take hostage.
Second one is that Irish is injured and helpless but Karon stands in front of him to try and protect him. Unfortunately, one of the pilots isn't very nice and tries to shoot through Karon to get to him. Irish sees what's about to happen so he pushes Karon out of the way but ends up getting shot as a result. Which one sounds better. |
2011-10-07, 08:39 | Link #2346 | |
I am no one
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
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Quote:
Karon: "WHY?!" Irish: "I don't want to owe an I.S. Pilot even if I should die" Karon: "Don't said it" Pilot: *SHOCK* My god what have I done? Note that Irish meant it, he doesn't want to owe Karon anything because they're enemies, while Karon accept it as flattery... (The more we discuss, the more I convinced that Karon suit him more than Tatenashi...well, Tatenashi still able to act as his sister figure, Karon can't) I believe the pilot that shot him could be reprimanded because she use I.S. weaponry in a (relative) conventional warfare and putting Karon in danger. (Then again, in front of military, Karon is pretty reckless and her action could be seen as treason)
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2011-10-07, 08:46 | Link #2347 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
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2.Karon DOES sound like she's better for Irish at this point, I can't ignore Tatenashi's character development though 3. The reasoning sounds perfect though, he also doesn't want to believe that any I.S pilot could be a good person so he pushes her out of the way to avoid having to admit it to himself. What do you think? |
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2011-10-07, 08:51 | Link #2348 | |
I am no one
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
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Quote:
The authority made a compromise to hold him as home prisoner than punish him in the jail based on his physical and mental condition, with a note that each and every action must be reported. They need someone skilled and trusted enough, hence they send Tatenashi. Number 3 indeed makes sense, I'm in.
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2011-10-07, 09:05 | Link #2349 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
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Quote:
Spoiler:
2. Yamada and Tatenashi will get character development on this segment as well. |
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2011-10-07, 09:14 | Link #2351 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
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Irish: Vengeance begets vengeance. The cycle never ends. |
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2011-10-07, 09:19 | Link #2352 | |
I am no one
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
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(Her daughters probably went nuts and/ or die, and Irish, who's alive and began to regain his sanity albeit slowly, hated her forever). EDIT: I'm out for 8-9 hours to sleep, see you later.
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2011-10-07, 09:25 | Link #2353 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
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Her involvement in the story is to show how the best of intentions can cause the worst of effects, especially for her family. Terrorist son, and evil IS pilots. Irish would probably need a LOT of convincing not to kill her though. She's the person who (unknowingly) sent his life straight to hell. |
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2011-10-07, 10:21 | Link #2354 | |||||||||||
~ Your Smile ~
Author
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: 346Pro
Age: 38
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I'm beginning to have an idea form in my head about this... Replace all of Karon's "Guys!" with "Everyone!" or "Girls!", since she's not a male and so would tend not to use something like Guys! in a school of essentially girls. What happened to her side of the exchange? Newtype Reactions usually work both ways. Like me to whip something up for him to see it? Quote:
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Iron Maiden vs Irish... And from the way Irish's suit works, it may have been built by Stark Industries. Karon's mission isn't a mission; she's an IS Gladiator. When not in school, her team and her participates in the IS Premier League which tallies the scores of all the IS teams in the world before pitting the top 25% against everyone else for the League Final. Not all matches are Versus; Team Rating is decided by 1v1, 3v3, and 5v5 matches. Then there's a Vanity Score which is obtained from practically anything, from volunteer work to random special events hosted by the League to Hero TV. Vanity Scores affect the Team Rating, but as the League Final requires combat skill, teams can't just run around grabbing vanity points and win the League Cup. Quote:
Snoooore. But it was a good read nonetheless. Now to see what Van Maark has got to do with all this. Quote:
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*shot* Quote:
------ The prickle burst of light flooded their senses, and the scene changed again. The world around them was brilliantly lit, save a panel on the wall which was nothing but the dull purple of the cosmos. Behind him were arrays of control panels. "This is... space?" Irish thought, but that could echo throughout the empty room. He quickly realized that this wasn't just a spaceship, but a Metroid ship. "Stop! You cannot go in there!" A voice lanced through his head. The boy spun round to face the autodoors at the far end. Around him, people suddenly appeared, manning their stations and calling out orders and responses. A flash from behind made him peer back. Now the empty cosmos was filled with trails of light interspersed with missile and tracer fire. The autodoors swished open, and a small figure darted through, coasting in the zero gravity. She was followed closely with a uniformed pair; try as they might, they couldn't catch her. The girl reached the main viewer and banged her fists on it. "Agor!!" She cried. Even though she spoke in an alien language, Irish knew that she was calling out to her brother. And he could sense her attention focused on a lone light bending and arcing as beams sliced through space behind it. His eyes widened as realization dawned; this was that Karon girl. This was her memories! The pursuing sailors caught up with her and haulled her off in spite of her kicking and screaming. "Leave her and return to your stations!" A man Irish felt was the Captain barked. "The fleet is buying us time to evacuate the civilians. Stop wasting time!" "Aye!" As quickly as they came, the duo disappeared back through the hatch. Without any more intrusion, Karon braced herself against the panels, watching wide-eyed as the battle before her unfolded. Shuttles and large craft were pulling away from a large orbiting cylinder, as a deadly silent light show sprayed out and enmeshed everything. The surroundings changed again; now Irish was floating in emptiness, flying and banking at dizzy speeds. "We're being torn apart!" "Just 2 more minutes! We just need two more minutes!!" Irish snarled. He knew what was attacking these defenseless craft. IS. On that thought, a new craft blinked through, discharging a blur of incendiary rounds from its axial cannon. They caught an IS in the shields, but exploded harmlessly. The fighter tore off with an Immelman Turn; the IS turned on a dime and pursued. "Agor..." That voice sounded desperate. "FOR THE REPUBLI--" "JIMMY!!" Everyone was desperate. "CWS bearing 125 mark 078 mark 090 fire!" "Three bogeys CBDR port side..." "Bulkheads 3 through 5 breached! Sealing off..." "Such... monsters..." Irish gritted his teeth. This was the sadness in the world corrupted by IS... But there was another voice, this time full of hope. "Black Knights! We have Vandam inbound! We have Vandam inbound!" "Fuck yeah about time she showed up!" "Hold it together Knights, we need 56 more seconds!" "Van...dam...?" Irish heard Karon whisper. Irish could see or hear nothing of this Vandam thing. He was made to focus on just that fighter now with 2 Stratos hot on its tail. The Cosmo Eagle reared on its tail and fired thrusters at max; it screamed backwards like an angry cobra, flitting by the two IS in pursuit. On instinct, they aboutfaced... and slammed headlong into the JDAMs the fighter left in its wake. The pilots disoriented and crashing into one another, the fighter nosed down and peppered the weakened foes. There was a satisfying flash as IS cores went nova. A new light lanced into view, firing beams of pink at dazzling speeds. There were a couple more explosions, then the foes realized that they had to retreat. The Cosmo Eagle banked again and pulled back with the other fighters as the comet rushed past them. "Yay!" Irish could feel Karon's elation. "Agor rules!" But that quickly turned to dread. Irish found himself back in the bridge, and staring at another IS. This one was so close, he could read the markings on the wings. And it was pointing its linear cannon squarely at the bridge. "Brace for impact!" And then, everything slowed to a crawl. The light in the IS' barrel gradually grew, then the grey-black hull of a Cosmo Eagle drifted in from the side. As Karon watched on in utter terror, the machine ploughed headlong into the shield, nose involuting as electric discharge railed off the IS shield. The body of the IS crumpled against the collapsing fighter, and momentum propelled the collased wreckage off the side. A bang could be heard through the deck, and the ship listed sharply. "See you in space, Karon." The voice that earlier informed his wing that the Vandam was arriving. Karon was knocked free, and Irish instinctively reached out. His hands passed through her as though she were an apparition. Someone in the back row caught her; Irish turned to see, and snarled. Even though her hair was floating all over her face, that woman had rabbit ears. "A... gor..." Irish stared on, fixed in place by the illusion around him, watching the small girl, eyes wide and brimming, grasping at air, at the spot where there was a Cosmo Eagle just a moment ago. But to his surprise, that woman was holding Karon very tightly against her chest. He could sense the pain from her. He could feel the tears on her cheeks. And she was saying, over and over, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." ------
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2011-10-07, 10:59 | Link #2355 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
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@ Meister- Who's Kirio? You seem to keep mentioning him.
Would the newtype reaction even work on Irish? His mind is completely closed off so all he'd see are jumbled images and random words. Karon is an ISper so she'd have an easier time seeing than Irish does. That's why he got a piercing headache while Karon didn't since his mind is rejecting the images. That draft was awesome! This is why I hate writing in first person view, you have to limit what you're writing to what the protagonist sees. Too bad I need it to keep the ambiguity of a situation or I won't have an excuse as to why I can't just write what everyones thinking. How would Irish know that was a metroid ship? It's not like his teammates told him anything about it during their free time. Some people Class 1-2 would probably find any excuse to assault Irish since he's been pissing them off from day one Attacking them when they attack him (He doesn't care about a persons gender, an enemy's an enemy to him), Being open about his dislike of IS pilots and being a prick in general Don't worry! I'll make sure Irish and Karon won't get together, don't want to intrude on your characters rights too much Hopefully this event won't smash his trust in Karon too much, he'll still push her out of the way of the bullet since he doesn't want to owe her but that'll lead to his temporary memory loss. That meeting was doomed to fail from the start The minute he blew up the power station then any chance of compromise was out the window. Who do you think would've helped them try to assault Irish? I have Karon's four teammates and the three feminists along with Tyra Hedberg. anybody else? EDIT: Finished first chapter of "Daydreams of Maidens in Love"! First chapter is up on fanfic.net Last edited by Eratas123; 2011-10-07 at 13:03. |
2011-10-07, 13:17 | Link #2356 |
Just another Idiot
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Delusion world
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Some random idea.... hopefully I can see the ending after all the randomness.
Antagonists: The evil Trio of bitches.....whatever Spoiler for A group of nasty girls:
Code Named: Black Dragon Knight Also Known as: Inverted V Spoiler for The real Bully:
====== Now Incoherent stuff again: Surprisingly, I think Male ocs can actually blend into Ichika's group quite easily. Being guys in all girls school, they just kind of click with Ichika. Probably hang out together to do some male bonding....(Yuu: GATTAI! Note To Yuu: NOT THAT KIND OF BONDING!). This is the reason why I created Pxyis. At the same time, I find the idea of having Female OC joining in the chaos without falling for Ichika quite interesting and challenging too.... I might have to divide the ideas into two different story: Pxyis and Amami Amami being the closest to the canon while Pxyis is the crackier of the two. Alternatively, I could just find a way to combine the two (may be use a Female Pxyis for the lol). Oh well.... time to go back to drafting board.
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2011-10-07, 17:02 | Link #2357 | |
I am no one
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
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Quote:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ain't Meister said it's okay to ship her? Look at his reaction! Well, it's still up to you... YAY! I'll read it quick!
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Last edited by ZeroXSEED; 2011-10-07 at 17:20. |
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2011-10-07, 17:14 | Link #2358 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
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Tatenashi: So Irish-kun, I've heard that you're going out with Karon-chan. Irish: No I'm not! *Blush* Tatenashi: Tsundere. Irish: Shut up! Tatenashi: fufufu~ I think it's time onee-san taught you about a girls body. Irish; ...I have a VERY bad feeling about this. As for the draft: It has a lot of potential bit wouldn't Phantom Task kill him rather than use him as an operative. I doubt a completely militant feminist group would use and give a male a unit considering he doesn't trust them like you said and he has a pretty good chance to defect. How's the story? I had to bang my head against the wall but I still don't think it had that "Shoujo" feel. Last edited by Eratas123; 2011-10-07 at 17:30. |
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2011-10-07, 17:58 | Link #2360 | ||
I am no one
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
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During his escape form Phantom Task, made some accident involving EMP, those will kill the Nanomachines implanted on his brain (in fact, this will happen later in Sacred Twins with Madoka) Shoujo? are you kidding me?! it's really, really feel very shounen for me (like School Rumble for example)... Houki's fantasy is incredible!
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fanfic ideas, fanfiction, ff.net, harem, is fanfic, warning fanfic spoilers, wincest |
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