Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha Character Creation and Discussion (second reincarnation)

[Kha]

So much epic in a day. Should've issued a storm warning.

I got ideas for later. And great work Tempy.

[Saint X]

*folds in*

Here's a Rather Short Prologue/Intro into Kriss's OC Debut.

Spoiler for Lyrical Phase: The Maiden Ascendancy:

As the turmoil of the Scagletti incident was still very much a fickle thought, those that will be affected by it by one way or another began to react at that impetus that was still silently enacted upon the Bureau- that it was no longer safe from within as well. One of these individuals was the illusive yet distinguished Admiral Kyla Scrya, head of the somewhat secretive First Independent Research and Experimentation of Developments Group or FIRED Group and it's Autonomous Military Arm called the AX or Aremitas Xellostre- which in Ancient Midchildan means Final Line/Stand/Solution. We now see her walking along the corridors of the group's primary base of Kagami, with a translucent image of a woman in maid uniform following her. The maid image had long black hair and had a strict face that only her azure eyes could break.

"Are you now feeling okay, Amiya?" Kyla began as they rounded another corner. "And how is your new home?"

"Travel stresses have been light, and my current facility is fine, though it is a far cry from where I was initially emplaced and the places where i was used to." the holographic maid replied, with a tact that some may find unnerving.

"I see... and?"

"I can't wait to get this so-called 'network' into my systems... if what I head from you is true, then my decision to leave my home planet was worth it."

The two then stopped at an open pair of elevator doors and entered the lift, doors closing after them. And the conversation continued as the left sped down.

"The mutiverse is a wide space Amiya, be assured of many opportunities." Kyla replied with a gleeful tone, a rare thing coming from the normally serious at work woman of 50 years. "Well anyways, once installation and system tests are done, we must formal testing in earnest. Will you be up for the challenge?"

"I have placed myself in that situation so that i can address the challenge sooner or later. If you remember what i have said years ago, you would have known."

"'You have placed yourself as a backup'... we know. But this part of space has its own challenges, not to mention its own rules and such. And as always, the unavoidable third parties..."

"You mean that Dr. Tsuzuki? He's strange, but his attitude and personality quite bode well with his intellect... a kind of strange reciprocity to be exact."

"Weirdness sometimes adds good flavor to things... but enough of that."

The elevator began to slow down at this point in time, the floor indicator no longer showing any numbers, indicating that this area was beyond the normal reach of any of the usual base personnel.

"What we need to address now is what kind of person or people should be bring in... as there are many kinds of people around."

"Allow me to deal with that." Amiya replied as the elevator stopped and its doors opened, revealing a hallway that has parts of it windowed, allowing a prime view of the ocean within. "With all you military running around, perhaps a change of pace is needed- civilians, perhaps?"

"I don't know... I've never been much of a civil person since i enlisted. But probably, maybe that can help..."

As they walked inside what is basically an undersea viewing tunnel, we now turn to the bustling city of Cranagan, to one of its classier shopping districts, to a small yet fully packed bookstore. The clientele at this moment seem to be all female, save the few males that happen to be buying as well, as well as the manager in attendance. And all were clamoring around a table stacked with orange covered books. And as the clamoring escalated into full-scale consumer war that could be seen during time service periods, we now set our sights outside of the shop, to a young woman of about 16 with long blonde hair, blue eyes, and a well endowed body. She was leaning on the wall and happily sighing and eying her wallet, particularly her AMT (Automated Monetary Transaction- ATM) Card, where a very handsome sum was just added to its usually low value- instantly making it her most treasured item at the moment.

"Happy-happy-Krissie... Finally, with this, not only can I mitigate those damages made by master- which I was forced to pay, but I have enough to last me until next allowance and a lot of extra for my personal things!" The woman thought as she closed her wallet and placed it in her bag. "I always wanted to buy a new something new just in case. But then..."

She peeked back into the shop and it was still in a state of slight anarchy, with the crowd, which were mostly girls, were now about to fight over the orange books.

"I have to satisfy more rabid fans..."

But as an Earth saying goes "curiosity killed the cat", her curiosity killed her hiding spot, when one alert shopper spots her. And a part of a stereotypical Earth like scene emerged as well- the so called "chase". But like almost all chases, it ends with the one being chased getting away, this time in Cranagan's huge Central Park. She sat on one of the benches and began to to look at the sky.

*Flashback*

It was a sort of a graduation day back then, a band of girls surrounds a younger version of this girl.

"Krissie, You're serious right?" a random friend, face seemingly covered by the blank mask on anonymity asked. "About that no-"

"Yes I am." the girl who answered to the nickname Krissie replied, a face full of determination. "Well, that's what life's all about."

Though a smile was on her lips, tears were streaming from her eyes. And as her friends walked away, only a clenched fist was being shown.

"One day, I will..."

*Flashback End*

"Was I... Dreaming? Why those memories now?"

Meanwhile, at another area of the park, we find someone sitting on a tree. It was a boy, with short brown and almost ruffled hair, in a gray-colored Bureau Naval Uniform and currently looking thru a pair of binoculars, trained towards a rather poor-looking soul in an Army Uniform trying to convince passing people- though mostly females to get a brochure from him.

"This is McDouglas, am I allowed to complain over this?" the watcher then thought. "He's more pathetic than what I was told."

"Patience boy. It usually takes time." A much older male voice came in the line. "And you did volunteer for this assignment."

"Well Captain, for your info, someone else would have made a more convincing attempt."

"Well why don't you try?" Another voice, this time female, came in near- too near and a bit above him to be exact. "You might be better than the chap the Admiral was presented with to attempt."

The observer removed his binoculars, and looked up to his companion. She was of the same age as him, female, shoulder-length brown hair and eyes, also wearing a gray Bureau Naval uniform. Even though she was a beauty, the male observer had only his stoic reaction.

"Why don't you try Ruri? You're always the one who's more convincing."

The girl named "Ruri" could only mumble as the scene before them carried on.

And we turn back to the area where we last saw our little Krissie. In the distance was a person in what seemed to be a generic Lab Coat and a yellow hard hat on his head, which his his midnight blue hair. And his black eyes were lingering at each person he was passing by, and periodically grunting "no", "probable" or "not perfect". Well the fellow passers-by were commenting at this rather strange behavior.

"What a strange guy..."

"Pervert"

"He must be one of those kinds of people..."

"Mama, what is he-"

"Get away from him dear!"

This scene continued for a little over five minutes until he was about a few meters behind and away from the bench "Krissie" was sitting on. And speaking of our her, she was still looking at the sky, dejected as ever as one hand tried to grab it to no avail- as always with these scenes.

"I wish I could fly..." She thought out loud. "Or even use magic for that matter."

"Why wish?" a voice came from behind her, though she did not look behind her as she was perceiving the voice from inside her head.

"Well wishing is what we could only do... we the powerless and useless people in this 'magical world' and it's free."

"Ohhh common commoner conceptions huh?"

"Hey, who are you calling a commoner you demented conscience of mine!"

"Well... look behind you."

Well, "Krissie" looked behind her and lo and behold, the man in the lab coat and yellow hard hat was staring at her, with a somewhat very evil smile on his face.

"Perfect... you're simply Perfect!!!"

"Perfect? wha- EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH?!!"

And so our bench sitting girl was now a girl being taken away, being carried bridal style. And as that happens, several Bureau communication devices rang up.

"We found her! I repeat we found her!" came in the transmission, as well as a lady's frightened screams and what seemed by be a bag being used as a club.

"Now that's results." "Ruri" commented as she went down from their hiding spot in the tree, followed by "McDouglas", who then waved to the person that they were watching. Said person finally stopped his futile attempts and sighed relief.

"I don't know who you are or where you are taking me, but let me goooooooooooooooo!" the comms continued with the sound of the bag hitting in between. "Let me go! Let me go! Let me go! Let me go! Let me go! Let me go! Let me go! Let me go! Let me go! Let me go! Let me go!"

"Don't worry... maybe we can let your dreams and wishes be reality."

Don't worry? How am I supposed to NOT WORRY if I was being taken like this!

Come to think of it... that was the beginning of everything for me... it was rather embarrassing.

And if wishes were made to be free... Then to make it true, I must do what I can... To Ascend!

Lyrical Phase: The Maiden Ascendancy

I hope I last thru this though...

[Sheba]

Originally Posted by Kha

Awesome work Sheba. While PF's fic was very fantasy, you've gone further in the other approach of Nanoha, the scifi aspect. Fighting with diminishing magic is one interesting aspect, and like the AMF, was one way of limiting the Aces quite a bit!

Hence why beamspamming would've been rather silly for your fic; feel free to leave it out.

AMF, then having common source... One makes you wonder if this really is the limit of Magic, which isn't limited in "conventional" scientific technology, and thus becoming the balance in the (sorely malnamed, but simple) Magic VS Science debate?

Either way, it is no wonder the Belka Empire was once so huge, it harnessed both to its power, and is something the newcomers to Ordered Space have yet to come to grasp. >=3

While chapter 2 is very sci-fi, it's just for one chapter. Then it'll be fantasy, otherwise, I'd not be talking about dragons, "ancient race" and whatever.
As for the disminishing magic, it echoes, in some ways, with one of the topics that obsess me the most: depletion of resources, and how people manage it.

EDIT:

And no, I refuse to drop my premise in the tech thread, I saw what people can do!

EDIT 2:

I started this because I want to see how I can piece my bits of crack together, instead of sitting around all day, nerd raging or talking, talking and talking about concepts I may never use.

EDIT 3:

The chapters are not set in stone, and are still subject to future corrections. If anyone want to write a short side-story about the transdimensional conflict and how your characters manage it, he or she is welcome. Most of clues about what they can do, and the different theaters of operations are presented in the first chapter.

[Kyral]

@Sheba.

This is the most awesome string of posts I have ever seen in my entire life!

Originally Posted by Kha

~~~New intelligence data updated~~~

More prerelease art for Codex Daemonjaegers:

Spoiler for And They Shall Know No Fear:

~~ And They Shall Know No Fear ~~

Someone might flip at this.

Wow, it's my color sheme!

[Kha]

~~~New intelligence data updated~~~

By request of Tempy and Nighty:

~~ Knight of Rounds ~~
From left to right, Maria, Vivio, Noland. Touareg in the background.

You see dead people, because this is the Knights of the Round summon.

[Evangelion Xgouki]

Originally Posted by Kha

~~~New intelligence data updated~~~

More prerelease art for Codex Daemonjaegers:

Spoiler for And They Shall Know No Fear:

~~ And They Shall Know No Fear ~~

Someone might flip at this.

I was hit by a tremendous idea, then presented to MercAng this unique challenge, and it is just wonderful. The Storm Bolter may seem small, but Kha isn't the kind to carry really heavy gear, unless wearing full Terminator armor. Everything else, its perfectly done, and is a very good contender for the bookcover art.

Ah so this was the commission she was talking about. Came out very nice.

Originally Posted by Kha

Now if only Anita'd be a bit more generous, we could be getting art for Codex Hexejaegers, covering Sophia, Keira, Ashley, Canoness Maria and the rest of her Sisters of Belka.

It's not nice to blame other people for your shortcomings

Originally Posted by Tempest Dynasty

So.

I did it again.

Consider this a sequel to the Southern Cross short I did.

Spoiler for Northern Lights:

*snip*

I has but two words to describe this:

F***ing EPIC

All it needs is that pic you found edited a bit at the end

[Kagerou]

Originally Posted by Kha

~~~New intelligence data updated~~~

By request of Tempy and Nighty:

~~ Knight of Rounds ~~
From left to right, Maria, Vivio, Noland. Touareg in the background.

You see dead people, because this is the Knights of the Round summon.

Because no one else will...

KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Actually it's pretty cool, carry on~

[Wild Goose]

Ladies and gentlemen, crossposted from FFT, I present a rather short, and IMO touching NanoFate piece here, entitled Dedication.

This piece is dedicated to Haru, Vivio Testarossa, and the tireless work of the NanoFate legion, for NF is serious business and more important, than, say, defending the world, fighting the good fight, and killing Taliban.

(I was being Deadpan Snark here but Haru thought I was actually serious and greeted me warmly. )

Spoiler for Dedication:

Fate Testarossa smiled as she gazed at herself in the mirror, admiring her long blonde hair and shapely figure, dressed in very, very sexy black lace lingerie. She arched her back and looked over her shoulder, pleased that the scars from Precia's whippings had faded so many years ago.

She was so pleased with herself that she purred, satisfied that all was ready for her darling Nanoha-chan. The doorbell rang and Fate pranced downstairs. Peeping through the eyehole, she confirmed the identity of her prey, opened the door and dragged Nanoha in, capturing the ponytailed girl's mouth with hers, deftly undressing her while closing and locking the door.

Nanoha was too distracted to realise that strapped to the small of Fate's back was a small leather scabbard, holding a knife...

* * * * *

In the aftermath of their lovemaking, Fate gazed lovingly into Nanoha's eyes, purring, "Oh, Nanoha-chan. I love you. Until the day I die I will love you, Nanoha-chan. I will love you more than that Ferret ever can. And I will dedicate my life to you, Nanoha-chan." She saw that Nanoha remained silent, and joy blossomed in her heart, for lo! her love and desire was moved into silence by her declaration! And to prove her dedication...

"Oh, Nanoha-chan, how I love you. I will wear your skin while rubbing myself erotically every night," purred Fate, planting a kiss on Nanoha's lips.

Nanoha remained silent. It was hard for her to answer Fate, as her eyes gazed blankly and lifelessly at the ceiling, her lifeblood leaking into a bright red puddle that faded to dark brown as the life went out of it.

Love. Dedication. Let it not be said that Fate lacked these qualities.

~fin~

*dons Ex-Gear and climbs into VF-25S Armored Pack cockpit, and prepares for incoming fire*

In my defense, I was trying to put something up that would shake up FFT. The Legion seems to like it. VT said, "Nice story, thanks."

*me headdesks, before casting Alert and Accel*

[AdmiralTigerclaw]

Originally Posted by Wild Goose

Ladies and gentlemen, crossposted from FFT, I present a rather short, and IMO touching NanoFate piece here, entitled Dedication.

This piece is dedicated to Haru, Vivio Testarossa, and the tireless work of the NanoFate legion, for NF is serious business and more important, than, say, defending the world, fighting the good fight, and killing Taliban.

(I was being Deadpan Snark here but Haru thought I was actually serious and greeted me warmly. )

Spoiler for Dedication:

Fate Testarossa smiled as she gazed at herself in the mirror, admiring her long blonde hair and shapely figure, dressed in very, very sexy black lace lingerie. She arched her back and looked over her shoulder, pleased that the scars from Precia's whippings had faded so many years ago.

She was so pleased with herself that she purred, satisfied that all was ready for her darling Nanoha-chan. The doorbell rang and Fate pranced downstairs. Peeping through the eyehole, she confirmed the identity of her prey, opened the door and dragged Nanoha in, capturing the ponytailed girl's mouth with hers, deftly undressing her while closing and locking the door.

Nanoha was too distracted to realise that strapped to the small of Fate's back was a small leather scabbard, holding a knife...

* * * * *

In the aftermath of their lovemaking, Fate gazed lovingly into Nanoha's eyes, purring, "Oh, Nanoha-chan. I love you. Until the day I die I will love you, Nanoha-chan. I will love you more than that Ferret ever can. And I will dedicate my life to you, Nanoha-chan." She saw that Nanoha remained silent, and joy blossomed in her heart, for lo! her love and desire was moved into silence by her declaration! And to prove her dedication...

"Oh, Nanoha-chan, how I love you. I will wear your skin while rubbing myself erotically every night," purred Fate, planting a kiss on Nanoha's lips.

Nanoha remained silent. It was hard for her to answer Fate, as her eyes gazed blankly and lifelessly at the ceiling, her lifeblood leaking into a bright red puddle that faded to dark brown as the life went out of it.

Love. Dedication. Let it not be said that Fate lacked these qualities.

~fin~

*dons Ex-Gear and climbs into VF-25S Armored Pack cockpit, and prepares for incoming fire*

In my defense, I was trying to put something up that would shake up FFT. The Legion seems to like it. VT said, "Nice story, thanks."

*me headdesks, before casting Alert and Accel*

And thus begins the Adventures of Fate Testarossa... certafied nutcase.

Originally Posted by Her LIST

Nanoha
HAYATE
SIGNUM
YUUNO
LINDY
BILL

(I pity whomever happens to be named Bill when she shows up.)

[TheShinySword]

I think that list is too short ATC Fate won't rest until every cast member's gone...

[Kha]

Originally Posted by Wild Goose

Ladies and gentlemen, crossposted from FFT, I present a rather short, and IMO touching NanoFate piece here, entitled Dedication.

This piece is dedicated to Haru, Vivio Testarossa, and the tireless work of the NanoFate legion, for NF is serious business and more important, than, say, defending the world, fighting the good fight, and killing Taliban.

(I was being Deadpan Snark here but Haru thought I was actually serious and greeted me warmly. )

Spoiler for Dedication:

Fate Testarossa smiled as she gazed at herself in the mirror, admiring her long blonde hair and shapely figure, dressed in very, very sexy black lace lingerie. She arched her back and looked over her shoulder, pleased that the scars from Precia's whippings had faded so many years ago.

She was so pleased with herself that she purred, satisfied that all was ready for her darling Nanoha-chan. The doorbell rang and Fate pranced downstairs. Peeping through the eyehole, she confirmed the identity of her prey, opened the door and dragged Nanoha in, capturing the ponytailed girl's mouth with hers, deftly undressing her while closing and locking the door.

Nanoha was too distracted to realise that strapped to the small of Fate's back was a small leather scabbard, holding a knife...

* * * * *

In the aftermath of their lovemaking, Fate gazed lovingly into Nanoha's eyes, purring, "Oh, Nanoha-chan. I love you. Until the day I die I will love you, Nanoha-chan. I will love you more than that Ferret ever can. And I will dedicate my life to you, Nanoha-chan." She saw that Nanoha remained silent, and joy blossomed in her heart, for lo! her love and desire was moved into silence by her declaration! And to prove her dedication...

"Oh, Nanoha-chan, how I love you. I will wear your skin while rubbing myself erotically every night," purred Fate, planting a kiss on Nanoha's lips.

Nanoha remained silent. It was hard for her to answer Fate, as her eyes gazed blankly and lifelessly at the ceiling, her lifeblood leaking into a bright red puddle that faded to dark brown as the life went out of it.

Love. Dedication. Let it not be said that Fate lacked these qualities.

~fin~

*dons Ex-Gear and climbs into VF-25S Armored Pack cockpit, and prepares for incoming fire*

In my defense, I was trying to put something up that would shake up FFT. The Legion seems to like it. VT said, "Nice story, thanks."

*me headdesks, before casting Alert and Accel*

BANNED

...is what I want to say; since if its targeted at FFC, why does this have to be posted here? I firmly believe fics written to smite someone/some faction is just plain immature.

Then again, many fanatics we've battled have been worse. >.>

Also, there's something called a diplomatic answer, and I think that's what's VT's up to. Of course, I might be giving the ditz too much credit, and I don't discount that, but like an earlier debacle, something isn't quite right here.

Other than that, nice random story Goose. Care to develop it?

[Sheba]

Originally Posted by TheShinySword

I think that is to short ATC Fate won't rest until every cast member's gone...

I can see Hayate as O-Ren, being a leader and all

[Wild Goose]

Originally Posted by Kha

BANNED

...is what I want to say; since if its targeted at FFC, why does this have to be posted here? I firmly believe fics written to smite someone/some faction is just plain immature.

That's because the follow-on, Aftermath, involves a fair number of OCs. If I put up Act II without Act I, nobody would understand what's happening.

As for written to smite a faction: actually I was wanting to put this up ever since I came here, but Kagerou kept talking me outta it. I finally decided to just post it up anyway. The germ of this was prompted by a guy I knew, who used this as his sig:
<nodsri>Oh Tamaki Nami-chan how I love you
<nodsri>I would wear your skin while rubbing myself erotically

As for smiting any factions... if anything, it's the Yuunoha faction that's thwarted, what with Fate killing Nanoha. And that honestly pains me a bit, due to me supporting Yuunoha. (Although I also support KyoMiyuNano 3-way sibling rabu-rabu. )

Also, there's something called a diplomatic answer, and I think that's what's VT's up to. Of course, I might be giving the ditz too much credit, and I don't discount that, but like an earlier debacle, something isn't quite right here.

Hey, if you can troll and be a /b/tard like Vivio, I can damn well write brokenness and explore the effects of obsession. And if you don't like my deadpan snarking, then what about Kyon, deadpan snarker with the many fans?

Other than that, nice random story Goose. Care to develop it?

See above. Aftermath features Fate's interrogation and attempts by CCs and OCs to understand why this happened.

Originally Posted by Sheba

I can see Hayate as O-Ren, being a leader and all

Same here, with the Wolkies filling the same role as Yubari. Though that's not quite the direction I'm taking this in.

[Kha]

You thwarted both factions yes because you bumped off the one common link, so my lean then comes from your author's notes.

I must be absent where it happened. Innocent question: Could you point me to an instance when she was trolling and being a /b/? My encounters has more been "good lord how dense can you get?!" than trolling.

[Kyral]

*clears throat*
I really hope you two stay civilized and won't drag this on too much.

Or maybe you want to consider using PMs to talk about this.

[Evangelion Xgouki]

Originally Posted by Kyral

*clears throat*
I really hope you two stay civilized and drag this on much.

Or maybe you want to consider using PMs to talk about this.

We don't need arguments and poo-flinging going on in two threads at once

[Wild Goose]

I'm settled and using PMs.

[Nightengale]

Originally Posted by Keroko

I took her early shyness into concideration as to how she would progress, but the later episodes and chapters of the manga show no trace of that shyness, and Sound Stage 4 blew any last remaining doubt away. Track 11 has Nanoha and Vivio go to the Church school, and Vivio happilly bounds off to meet her new classmates, no trace of any shyness to be found. She pretty much abandonded the initiall insecure shy-moe shell over the course of the series.

When I said ‘shyness’, I meant those akin to adult!Fate-kind.

Anyway, SSX is a better showcase.

Originally Posted by krisslanza

*Skims by*
...
Why am I hearing genderbending?

Also: Subaru vs Snake. lawl <.>

Snake has faced worst opponents than Subaru.

Originally Posted by tshouryuu

Here is a little something that SaintX has been cooking for sometime that I have edited. It is the frame work for a few future OCs, one of them being Kriss Lanster (krisslanza)

Spoiler for Otome system:

Thoughts?

Well, obviously one question is how powerful are they compared to the original Otomes/average mage rank/etc?

Since we can’t exactly have some of them who are literally mountain punchers.

And distinct limitations, one way or another is advisable. One way or another, minority systems always need something to offset wide-spread usage of it. Otherwise, it’d demean the value of wide-spread systems.

Originally Posted by Tk3997

many people would prefer to forget it even existed, but it dose and Metal Gear has taken a massive slant toward the weird though it was always there a bit. One of the bosses in Metal Gear one was a guy that floated in the air without any tech and could read minds and conjure fire for instance... One of the enemies in three is part planet, another can command a swarm of killer bees, and one of them apparently was able to commune with dead spirits. Also the SEVERED HAND of one character when grafted onto another (to replace the one chopped off by a super powered killer cyborg...) sometimes takes over the recipnets mind. Metal gear is anything, but normal really...

Nanomachines.

Originally Posted by Keroko

*clucks tongue* My throat feels dry after reading this. It seems that even the creator himself feels like shafting Hayate.

Originally Posted by Keroko

The existence of magic circuits is neither confirmed nor denied as far as I know, so since it doesn't contradict anything, I see no reason not to use them.

Even if they exist, they exist alongside Linker Cores.

Something akin to tentacles of a Linker Core even, possibly. This might even be a good parallel to why Hayate’s processing speed is bad.

The larger the Core capacity, the slower or less tentacles there are for magic procession.

Which is kinda ironic, since Hayate is teh groper of the cast.

Originally Posted by Wild Goose

Since Belkan users are essentially Ki users, and since they're all one in the same, just make them Belkan. Besides, if you're having people throwing around fireballs just from shounen power, Comar, then it's no longer quite Nanoverse.

Eh, if we follow rule of wuxia ki, Mid and Belka are both ki users. Actually Mid more so.

It’s like the emphasis of sword-play techniques vs internal techniques, where despite learning both, one is favoured over the other.

Originally Posted by Kha

We see Hayate getting the shaft so badly, we can conclude that whether Keroko exists or not is completely up to us, since if it were up to Tsuzuki, he could create a 4th Ace and still have her completely pushed off the table.

And let's not even consider what would happen to a male Ace, and one that takes 5th place. This will completely blunten any power canon has to disprove Kha's existence on the basis of a total no-show.

Interesting thoughts, interesting thoughts...

Hey, are we forgetting that all of the Aces are on the eventual road called shaft and retire?

Originally Posted by Keroko

It is a little known fact that Keroko and Chrono were dating at one point in time.

*Runs like crazy while dodging red blasts of magic*

It is a well-known fact that they’re available to each other whenever necessary.

Or Keroko is available to everyone appropriate, more appropriately.

*flees*

Originally Posted by Keroko

*rubs eyes tiredly* I'm tired and going to sleep, but I managed to finish this before I go.

Archer-ko? Is that you?

Anyway, I don’t really like seeing the AAA word there, but it all depends on Vivio, I guess. I’d say AA or AA+ at best.

Originally Posted by Wild Goose

It's now up to a small team of 7 men to get in there and save Vivio.

Erick von Long, first Erusian recruited into the TSAB, the Flawless Gunslinger. A. J. Ivanovich, Mage Hunter of North Point. Glen Schattenmann, the Fire Knight. Master Chief John-117, the Green Demon. Yuuno Scrya. Franz Jaeger. And one man, seeking his redemption: Noland Reineger, the Calamity Knight.

Noland will walk into that Wasteland, with only one purpose: to rescue his beloved Sankt Kaiser.

And Death follows behind him.

Sounds like a horror-ish movie setting.

7 will enter.

But only *some* will return.

Originally Posted by Keroko

Well, the AAA rank is to make her and Vivio about equal in strength (as my mind fails to compute Vivio at anything less then AAA rank at that age) but as it stands, she won't rise much higher then AAA+, though that is of course subject to change.

and yes, her Barrier Jacket is cute. Much to Syn's mortification. She can't even get rid of the wings, as the two designed them to help stabilize her flight magic.

Equal doesn’t always mean she will have the same rank. After all, if anything, Vivio should be set up to be awkwardly superior one way or another.

Originally Posted by Kyral

*sigh* And there goes my intention of writhing shorter chapters...

It again turned out longer than planned...

Ah well... anyway. Chapter 5 of my main story is ready!

And as promised... a bigger titel so it won't be overseen.

Memories of Blood and Sorrow
Part 5: Ghost Hunt

Spoiler:

[Midchilda central, TSAB GAS HQ, canteen] [May, MC 076]
.

Puuh... next chapter is already in the works...

For a relatively ‘long’ chapter, nothing really happens, but it’s nice. :3

Originally Posted by Aaron008R;1704809[B

@Keroko: [/B]And Keroko, that means Syn is now a mostly toughie-tough girl with the family/friends that wants her to be cute...? X

Vivio : Self-proclaimed normal.
Syn : You should be normal, girl? :3

Originally Posted by Aaron008R

I don't like how 7arcs seemingly made Hayate as a helpless solo combatant. But that doesn't necessarily mean that I hate the concept in itself, I just hate the insanely high degree they used the glass cannon nerf-bat. -_-

Being a spellcaster type is a pretty difficult class to be in. But in Hayate's case, she has so much potential in managing to circumvent such. (Potential wasted in StrikerS.) But then, I can at least have my say.:3 And for me, she's quite honestly the most multidimensional of any of the Canon Aces. There's so much untapped character development and possible field dynamics to explore. *holds back another mention of my unspeakable hate for 7arcs* To me, she's the most 'human' and least static of the three. There's also the fact that I just love her occasional bouts of mischievousness that adds a great twist to her Main-character (Though the treatment she receives is even worse compared to side-characters. -_-) mandatory 'nice girl' personality. Oh, and of course I find her more attractive compared to the other two, almost forgot to say it.

I've always had the tendency to have a lot of interest in uncommon stuff. Same applies for the characters I make and how I develop some Canon Characters. Easiest example would be Aurion's device, which is a prosthetic arm. XD

Though some times I may have the tendency to try making my work too radically different whilst at the same time trying to stick as much as possible to Canon...

Originally Posted by Keroko

So don't take that test seriously, its far too limited.

The ‘Sue’ word is far too abused to be acceptably limited.

You might as well call every Arthurian romance and other mythos a Suethology at that rate.

Originally Posted by Tk3997

Unlike these lazy bums I'll acutally try and help you out.

Not much but some fun facts off the top of my head on Ancient Belka:

Personally I think the Saint Church should be treated like modern organized religion on earth people can believe if they want too, but it’s based on faith no facts. Basically I don’t think having members of the church calling down divine powers from the heavens to smite there foes or the like really fits the setting at all. An ambiguous visitation? An odd event that somehow inadvertently saves someone? Sure, but battling demons with the power of the creator? Not so much.

Took those words right out my mouth.

Originally Posted by Satashi

Well, this is OC centric ( Syn, made by Keroko) so I thought I'd post this here out of respect for the original Character I fell in love with.

Spoiler for Vivio to Syn.:

Originally Posted by PhoenixFlare

You won't believe how accurate it works in most relationships. I almost choked!

And yes! The one between Aurion and Hayate is a sekuh--!!

*is Proton Cannon'd*

Originally Posted by Sheba

Pfft, everyone knows that Belka is founded by a Goa'uld named Wotan.

No, it’s founded by an arrogant king who spends his days going LOL WOMEN AND CHILDREN.

*flees*

Originally Posted by Comartemis

Spoiler for Negima Spoilers:

Negima canon hints at Asuna being a part of the royal family of the magic world kingdom of Vespertina; suppose said kingdom was based on an offshoot of the Belkan Royal Family? Asuna's abilities as a magic canceler are actually a lesser version of the Saint's Armor acquired through genetic manipulation as the original Kaisers did prior to the fall of Belka. Her heterochromia, as with Vivio, is evidence of the genetic tampering done to her to bring out recessive genetic traits and try to piece the Armor back together again, which also results in an extremely slow rate of physical growth as we see in Negima. I think it fits better than my throw-away idea of making Asuna into Vivio's prototype, but what does the jury say on this one?

I’d more like Asuna is a different version of a unique magical bloodline.

Only that Asuna’s is natural, while Vivio’s are from genetic modification.

Originally Posted by Comartemis

Spoiler for This Crowning Moment of Awesome was brought to you by Comacanon:

“Farseer! Set-up!”

Well, an awkward twist I would agree... but still... kinda awesome.

Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki

*sniffs*

I think I smell...crack

Spoiler for Bat Man?:

I blame Aaron for this

NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU~ D:

The only Batman allowed in Nanohaverse is Batarisa. D:

Arisa: What’s that?
Aurion: Oh, the Nietono? You wouldn’t be interested in that-

*Arisa starts using the blade like a pro*

Aurion: We never got the damn internal flight programming of the flame wings in the device to work... but otherwise, it works just fine.
Arisa: Does it come as a katana?

Originally Posted by XenahortCharybdis

Head knowledge is one thing, Comart. The power to use it is another, and as far as canon has it, it doesn't look like Yuuno can do that, yet. You'll need to prove it, or show it in your canon, without breaking too much canon china. And if you were referring to yourself when you talked about his Taking a Level in Badass...then well, I'm afraid the term "Badass" has gone mainstream.

What, Yuuno has potential badass enough as he is.

Spoiler:

Spoiler:

He just needs to cough out tons of blood.

Originally Posted by Wild Goose

Well, here goes. The most protective Barrier Jacket seen in OC - short of TK's Ranger Barrier Jackets, anyway.

...or a Full Armor Danmaku Jacket...

Spoiler for Type-ODST Assault Barrier Jacket:

Spoiler for Background:

Lieutenant Jaeger doesn't care. All he cares about is that it'll keep him alive with he accidentally shoots himself with a grenade launcher. Again.

Well, they didn’t think a regular grunt’s extra protection was worth 100 grand.

Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki

The following unofficial sequel is all Lowe's fault. Blame him for what he suggested

The image is awkward, after Sagark and Yuuno!Kiva. -_-

Originally Posted by Ryand-Smith

... Ok my friends, please, let's not fight too much...

*hides in the Das Smith Bunker*

Well, time for Shin Profiles.

Spoiler for Great Brian:

.

Well besides that, Here is cleaned Origins Chapter 1

Spoiler for Aura and Dussander Origins 1:

"

Not that I don’t like it. Quite the contrary actually… though..

Or is it just me, or does that just scream STAR WARS!?

Originally Posted by Sheba

Then I remembered AARON SMASH...

And has gone to write a slice of life bit to check if I still has the writing groove:

Spoiler for A slice of life part 1:

Depending on the reception, I may or may not continue it.

And I realized one thing, dialogues were never my forte. So my stories tend to kinda look like a spaghetti western by Sergio Leone.

Well… it’s hard to say, since nothing really happens. I’m pretty divided on diary-like narration storytelling. Some novels do them well, but otherwise, it does feel uneventful.

And dialogues are okay.

Originally Posted by TheShinySword

@.@ well here's the crack that's been boiling in the IRC (both the FFC and the OCC. The ideas came from everyone who was there really. Tempest, I think, came up with the original idea, which proceeded to get bounced around, with apologies to everyone featured .

Monty Khrack and The Holy Flail

Spoiler for Here it is:

@__@ FLAIL.

Made of so much awesome my brain barely computes.

Originally Posted by PhoenixFlare

All right, I manage to finish the next chapter today, and it's passed all betas (sorta ), so I'm going to post it now. Here goes the Bluecheesium of the Day!

Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha GuardianS

Chapter Nine—Decisions

Spoiler for Scene I:

[Unknown Location] [February 14th, MC 081] [1908 hours]

Beautiful. Although the emotions could’ve been ‘haughtier’ in the scene with Grandy and Shary, it was nice. A little too long though, it’s almost like a torture on Shary.

Then again, the music of your choice… Tsubasa and .hack/sign… couldn’t be any fitting, in more ways than one. :3

Originally Posted by PhoenixFlare

Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha GuardianS

Chapter Nine—Decisions

[SPOILER=Scene II, continued]=Continued=SPOILER]

I’ll be frank… I’m not a big fan of Teslafitth (( Lucino ftw )) and it did have… some pacing awkwardness (( atypical of all lengthy PF chapters ))…

But I’d be lying if it didn’t excite me. :3

Originally Posted by PhoenixFlare

Last volley!

Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha GuardianS

Chapter Nine—Decisions

Spoiler for Scene III:

[Escutcheon, Cranagan City] [February 14th, MC 081] [2031 hours]

… Syringa vulgaris?

Right, that's about it. It's rather short (four scenes in total), but I think this is the most fanservice-choked chapter of all, and our shippers are grinning like devils, especially Hayaurion legions.

*flees from Aaronwrath*

Don't mind the references, it's cheesy and cliched, I know, but I still prefer them there.

Hope you all enjoy it, too!

Anyway, for this chapter, there will be a small credits post, since I really received a lot of help from these people. Without them, this will probably be a very tough job.

Spoiler for Credits:

I'd like to thank:

• Lowe -- For his brief glance-through at excerpts I posted for him, especially on the romance part. You're a great help, buddy!
• Keroko -- For giving me the creative license and full support for developing Tesla's relationship. I enjoy it very much myself!
• Aaron -- For being the beta-reader of the chapter, since I was finding it strange at some parts. Thanks! And most of all, for being open with the Hayaurion part. I loved every moment of it myself.
• SpaceBrotha -- For giving me a link to a very beautiful song, but unfortunately at the last moment, I decided to stick mostly to one composer first so that it's not clashing. Sorry.
• Others - If I forgotten you for whatever help you've given.

Rather short? @.@ It’s puzzling how you can say that so easily.

PFHUEGPICSIUM as usual, along with usual pacing flows. It’s natural of you, but sometimes you can do well to cut off the fat from some parts and putting them elsewhere. Reading one shot at times make the thing look uneven.

Originally Posted by Evangelion Xgouki

Macross Frontier is crack I tell you! CRACK!!

-------------------------

What happens when Nanoha has two people fighting for her attention?

Spoiler for Your Attention Please:

Replace Nanoha with Aurion and Fate with Leona.

Then it computes. :3

*flees*

Originally Posted by Sheba

This is one of the fictionnal worlds that made me go

The amount of details poured in there is just stunning, at the point to make me swirl.

Sometimes, too much does not make it better.

ESPECIALLY when they’re trying to do all things at once.

Originally Posted by dkellis

Apparently when I try to make Mary Sues, I'm the only one who thinks so.

Overpowered Character Attempt 2.0. I'm feeling a bit left out of the Everyone Yelling At Me that so characterizes this thread.

Spoiler for Mei Landau:

[j/k]Mary Sues? You can’t handle Mary Sues!![j/k]

Seriously though, such thoughts usually lead to Mary Sues not being created than actually.

And what’s this? A AU Tomoyo or something?

Originally Posted by Kha

>_>

...

<_<

...

*bombs*

Spoiler for Lesson 162.5 - See you in a Brighter Future -Khrack Extension!:

Lesson 162.5 - See You in a Brighter Future - Khrack Extension!

ground and certainly still absolutely floored by the turn of events.

I pray to the Light that I may be still alive tomorrow, for I fear that I may be painted for an Ion Cannon Breaker.

*starts running. Really, really REALLY FAST!*

Erm… whut?

*brain is boggled from the mess just read*

Originally Posted by Aaron008R

Excelleeeeeeeeennt!
That's why I kept telling you in IRC to go for it, eh?:P

I liked the interactions a lot. The sudden appearance of OC's in Negimaverse takes a bit getting used to, but it was made lighter by the fact that you and Keroko had been discussing about it in detail, so I pretty much know a fair bit about Keroko Negima version ( to Keroko for the awesome shop!) and Kouya.:3

It's poignant and sweet. You can pick up a lot of implied details already just from the scene alone. This has me anticipating your and Keroko's foray into Negimaverse in full force.

Anyway, I can't really be active for longer than I thought.:/ This thesis work is taking up much of my time. Though I prioritize this a lot since I want to increase my CGPA, so I need to focus on other subjects as well. The only sure time I can return here is probably not gonna come until April of next year... T____T

*sob*

;___;


Oh, and, snippet.

Originally Posted by Satty

Sorry for the double post, but whenever I try to put 13 in with 12, the system give me a message "too short" error (as if.)

Anyway, chapter 13, oh, and I'm curious to see if anybody could find some references I've put in.

Spoiler for SearcherS 13:

planned.”[/CENTER][/I]

Sorry for the squished text...I'll fix that later. Now...to work on my MG Ez8...later

The squished text isn’t bad. And nice. It’s not as long individually, but it’s a nice length in comparison to other chapters.

But Satoshi being… @_@

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

MSLN TEST DUMMIES: Chapter Six

Spoiler for Six A:

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

End of Chapter.

Yes, very. >.>

And argubly my favourite piece of yours yet. Exciting, great character dynamic with a tinge of comedy. Watching Crash going around with Wolkies were great, even if Signum is particularly absent.

Originally Posted by -Fate-

Its been quite a while since I've submitted another work. Also due to SSX, I'll probably have to make some minor changes in my fanfic. Anyway, I'll set that issue aside for now and post the 2nd chapter of my work.

魔道騎士雷アスクレイ

Madou Kishi Ikazuchi Asclei

Here's some extra scenes as well:


I'm not good at writing so just bear with my grammar if you could

True, the grammar's not that good, but it's fine as it is. It helps that you used a dialogue style writing, but it would be good if you could tone it down.

Otherwise, pretty solid chapter. >:3

Originally Posted by Wild Goose

Trailer of something in TF6:

She can start by... you know... commanding. That's the real problem with Hayate.

Forget combat fanservice, there was serious disservice to character development as a leader.

Originally Posted by Tempest Dynasty

Well, this took way to long to get out. And during the weekend too!

Ach. Update during a slow time.

Oh well. Enjoy, in any case.

Spoiler for Act 2:

“[I]

... It's very well written, as EXPECTED of Tempest...

But what's with... the... awkward... awkward... tension?

Chrono's personal tension, alongside Yuuno's seemingly unlike him's carelessness. It just didn't feel like... 'them' so much.

Originally Posted by Sheba

Here I drop my HUGE tetris!

The first chapter of a story. While I love the thrillers of the spy or political kind, my reading background made me cut more for the simpler stories.

Expect not:

- Me managing the huge cast. I stuck to a trimmed down cast I can somewhat manage.

- Geass-like plot twists.

- Death Note-like Mind Games.

- Battle plans a la Hannibal.

T_T

Originally Posted by Sheba

Here I drop my HUGE tetris!

LIES, SHEBA. YOU LIED.

The first chapter is literally epic building of hueg cast, plot-twist and battle plans.

And great chapter, except one flaw. Considering the urgency of the discussion, naturally the 3 Legendary Admirals should’ve been there as well.

Originally Posted by Sheba

Next part:

And everyone on IRC who had to stand my rambling about relatively alien concepts that were often out of their own frame of references.

Nuff said. Everything else I already said in IRC.

Originally Posted by dkellis

This is a long, boring summary of my own main fanon timeline. I'm posting this for archival purposes, so I can point to it in case anyone accuses me of making it up as I go along.

Feel free to skip. If you decide to read it, you might need a spreadsheet to keep track of everything here. Sorry.

Spoiler for Complete summary of the Lyrical Babel plot.:

interesting that way.

Well… that’s a little… mind-boggling to say the least.

I’d say that it’d be nicer if you could ‘concentrate’ the plot. Some elements need not be used yet, even when introduced. Kinda like a universal set-up, but not universal end kind of thing.

Originally Posted by Keroko

Can't recall... it's been a looong time ago when that was mentioned, I don't even know in which topic it was.

That about describes what is going through my head as well T_T

On one hand, Archery is cool, and Syn's skill list has a few awesome spells. On the other hand, hand to hand is just as cool, and it certainly suits Syn's smart talking personallity better. Not to mention the scenarios with Syn and Vivio back to back.

I've always been a fan of close combat. No ammount of gun blazing could ever compare to a fight between people in close combat. this makes me wonder where my head was when I decided to give Syn a bow, especially since her original draft already was a close-combat specialist

Don't get me wrong, I'm still quite satisfied how Syn as an archer turned out, but now I'm hesitating whether that was the right choice, both for her and me. Now that I'm actually working on combat scenarios, I find Syn often filling the role of Hayate. With her virtually non exitent melee and 'keep a distance' combat style, she sort of... fades away in the background. It's probably just me, but it bugs me.

Also, as a finishing strike, I've been rewatching the final episodes of StrikerS and was reminded just how awesome Vivio in melee is, and how awesome it would be to have Vivio and Syn fight side by side, rather then Syn supporting her from a distance.

And then as if to kick me while I'm down I started to watch Tetsuwan Birdy, which has even more awesome hand to hand melee fights. Not to mention that Birdy in terms of personallity ocasionally reminds me of Syn too!

???: Are you crazy? What kind of archer drops her bow and then proceeds pound-for-pound with someone faster, stronger in close range!?

Syn: You know what they say. There are exceptions to everything.

Originally Posted by Kha

Jimmy you just spoiled my Nanoha/Cente Gravia plot!!! XD

But really, how does a non-functioning gate have a chance of regenerating into a new defence program? It can't even run itself anymore.



~~~New Intelligence Data Updated~~~

BetrayerS Khrack:

Spoiler for The Saint's Union Ratification Ceremonial Hall:

9nd Administrated World, Artemis
Saint’s Union Ratification Ceremonial Hall

back.

And notice that Hayate is not shafted, and instead is central to the entire conflict, even though Kia took all the limelight.

Nanoha is... elsewhere. And Fate-chan...

I wonder how many people will kill me for this little arc...

Now for something even worse: [spoiler]

*RUUUUUUUUUUUUNZZZZZZZ*

I am the 99th Supreme Commander-in-Chief of TSAB, Vi-

*static*

Originally Posted by Kha

I don't think Hayate would join the SU that early. It'll completely defeat the purpose!

You'll be surprised how she looks like unisoned with her Other Self.



Don't worry its just nothing really. :P




~~~New Intelligence Data Updated~~~

More BetrayerS khrack, this time, it's officially Chapter 1 Scene 1, taking the doujin released as its Prologue.

And so, I give you:

Kha the Cleric's
Magical Lyrical BetrayerS

Chapter 1, Scene 1

Spoiler for BetrayerS Chapter 1 Scene 1:

“ZIEG BELKAAA!!!”

I'm sorry, I think I got carried away with trying to make an epic opening and completely forgot that I wasn't playing Company of Heroes but writing a magical girl story...

It's pretty good, if I should say so myself. Though the Chancellor Jeremiah thing was >.>. Almost reminds me of Emperor Paltapine. ;p

Originally Posted by tshouryuu

As Estavali mentioned before, my crack engine was running at max power churning out crack at speed. I managed to refine the crack a little bit more and this is the result. Btw you guys can thank Nighty as he was the one to ask for crack. Be warned as it can be a little dry.

Spoiler for Cracked General History:

e still frowned on by the other TSAB members.

Comments and Criticisms please. I much prefer the latter usually but whatever.

lol, so it's my fault? >.>

Anyway, it's decent. There are parts left and right which contradict fanon and canon though, especially the centralization on only 2 factions for Belka. From the booklet tls, I was under the impression that there were a LOT of Belka 'Kings' which supports my 'Warring States' theory.

Originally Posted by AdmiralTigerclaw

Okay... In case people've been confused by me anylizing cranagan in the IRC, It was for some work...
How accurate does this look for Cranagan?
And... how's this chapter opener flow to everyone?

who will do any job, no questions asked for the right price. And we know 'Word of mouth' transcends dimensional space in ways we cannot fathom.

You miss the part where seemingly 30% of entire Cranagan is ABANDONED DISTRICTS.

Originally Posted by ghazghkull

BEHOLD!!! ONE OF THE FEW, IF NOT, THE FIRST ONE-SHOT ABOUT The Numbers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Spoiler for A Sister's Boredom:

A Sister’s Boredom

Rare for a Numbers fic, indeed.

Though I kinda want to see a lazy-bro Jail and bro-con Uno as well... >.>

Originally Posted by Keroko

Threes? Shouldn't that be fours?

Anyway, its more a thing that everyone from the Quint gene uses rollerblades and a zero-subtlety aproach, then to have someone from that gene be designed for infiltration kinda clashes.

Oh, and Ghaz? I'll break FF backlog later and comment propperly, but yay for Numbers fluff!

Now where's Nighty when you need him? <_<

*FLAILS*

[Kha]

Hurray! Nighty caught up!

Too bad See you in a Brighter Future popped your mind. It certainly popped many, including mine.

And yeah Jeremiah's title was inspired by Palpatine, but his character is not just that. I'm still wondering about what's the final direction of the BetrayerS storyline; Noland changed things a little.

And so, welcome back.

[AdmiralTigerclaw]

Originally Posted by Wild Goose

Well, here goes. The most protective Barrier Jacket seen in OC - short of TK's Ranger Barrier Jackets, anyway.

...or a Full Armor Danmaku Jacket...

Spoiler for Type-ODST Assault Barrier Jacket:

Spoiler for Background:

The Barrier Jacket is the simplest and final defense of a mage, servicing two purposes: it acts as a last-ditch defense against magical attack by generating Barriers and Fields, and also serves to preserve the mage's modesty. However, it has several weaknesses.

While providing decent protection against collision impact, Barrier Jackets are less capable in protecting against penetration and slashing damage - this is due to the fact that most Barrier Jackets are made of thin cloth, as the mana is being shunted into the barrier, as as few mages face threats from gun users. This SOP came into place after Midchilda's final war and the shift to magical combat, where mages realised that other mages would be bigger threats to them, not gun users, and accordingly adjusted their barrier jackets to focus on magical protection.

The TSAB was thus in for a rude shock in the Erusian War, where then-Gunnery Sergeant A. J. Ivanovich earned his nickname of "Mage Hunter of North Point" by racking up an impressive tally of kills: mages sniped with his 14.5mm sniper rifle.

When Erick von Long formed the Order in the wake of the nuking of Sotoa, he wanted a Barrier Jacket design for his mages that would not only protect against magical threats, but would also provide decent protection from conventional weapons. After talking it over, Erick, the XO, and Ivanovich also decided that the Barrier Jacket would have to be thicker and tougher than standard TSAB barrier jackets, simply because the Erusian mages they had to work with weren't as used to magic as Mid-childans, and were much slower at casting barriers and shields compared to their TSAB counterparts. At first, it was suggested to make a thicker TSAB standard-issue jacket, but Erick nixed the idea due to the need for plausible deniablity in OFM operations.

It was his Sergeant Major, A. J. Ivanovich, who suggested the idea of the Assault Barrier Jacket - a Barrier Jacket based off the armored combat bodysuits used by Erusian special forces units. Known as the Assault Barrier Jacket, since it would be used by the OFM's Assault Platoon, it would essentially be a fusion of standard barrier jacket and special forces bodysuit. Erick gave the go-ahead, Ivanovich went scrounging, O'Neil talked to some people, and within a few weeks a rough prototype was ready. Testing commenced, and the prototype was found to be well suited for the intended purposes Erick had in mind for the Assault Platoon. After some more fine-tuning and tweaking, the Assault Barrier Jacket was ready for deployment, and issued to the Assault Platoon. In the past 21 years it's been in use, it's undergone periodic updating, one major design revision, and remains by far one of the most-protective barrier jackets in existence.

As the mages intended to use this Barrier Jacket are for the most part B-ranked, it thus is tuned to provide higher latent protection against magical attack, being amply protected against conventional weapons. The fabric of the Assault BJ is also thicker than standard BJs, providing better heat retention in cold climates, though it does become fairly hot in normal, hot or temperate climates. Temperature control is what the Assault BJ's field is for, although Ivanovich has eloquently stated that if an Assault guy cannot take the heat, he should Golf Tango Foxtro Oscar.

The last component of the Assault BJ is the helmet, which is optional. The helmet contains a communications and HUD package to provide higher situational awareness, as well as a digital navigation system. The blue visor helps to shade the eyes and hide the identity of the user - a key consideration in black operations - and, like the helmet, is capable of protecting the wearer from limited rifle fire. That said, several members of the Assault Company (notable Lt. Franz Jaeger and Sgt. Major Ivanovich) typically dispense with the helmet.

Though it flies in the faces of TSAB tradition and everything mages stand for, no current member of the OFM's Assault Company - except for the Master Chief - will trade in his Assault BJ. It works, it's a lifesaver...

And most importantly, it's badass.

Spoiler for Design:

Assault Company mages on training excercise, circa mid MC070s. Note the BR55HB carried by the squad leader.

Unlike the standard TSAB barrier jacket, which resembles a rather fantasy-ish design for random cannon fodder, the Assault Barrier Jacket is essentially a magically-enhanced copy of the NAVSPECWAR bodysuit. Visually the jacket is a full-body suit in a mottled black & gray urban camoflage pattern, chosen as the OFM would primarily operate at night in urban theaters. The torso is covered by black body armor - magically strengthened and magically-lightened copies of the body armor worn with NAVSPECWAR bodysuits - and arm, elbow, and shin pads are also worn, providing extra protection (though these pads are primarily intended for protecting against scrapes and bumps, not bullets, they can tank a few pistol caliber rounds). On the biceps are mounted colored metal plates, which are either white or red; squad members use white plates, while squad leaders use red plates. Black fabric covers can be used to cover the colored plates if required.

The Assault BJ protects very well against pistol rounds - tanking even .50cal Magnum pistol rounds - and most small arms fire. It can withstand several bursts of 7.62mm rifle fire and .50cal MG rounds, but sustained heavy weapons fire will defeat the Assault BJ. Assault Company members have reported surviving grenade detonations at point blank range, but are encouraged to take cover rather than standing in the open and tanking.

Spoiler for Assault BJ Ver. 1:

The first version of the Assault BJ.

The original version of the Assault BJ was a rather simple design, essentially a black and gray urban pattern camo bodysuit with a black body armor vest, shin guards and a helmet. It was chosen rather than a more elaborate design in adherence to the KISS principle: Keep It Simple, Stupid. As such it's little more than a basic TSAB barrier jacket with urban camo and body armor that covers the upper torso. The helmet contains a simple compass and HUD, and holds the radio communications gear, as well as protecting the user from sun glare and from identification. The armor, being fairly light, can protect the user from small arms fire and explosions, but not so well in case of the latter. A disadvantage with using this barrier jacket - to those used to Mid-style jackets, anyway - is that it's heavy compared to a standard Mid-Childan jacket, weighing 11 pounds. (It should be noted that this weight is considered absurdly light by the military forces of NAW 97.)

After MC0066, the 1st version of the Assault BJ was scrapped and a revised replacement was fielded, which visually resembles the armored bodysuits of the elite Orbital Drop Shock Trooper Marines, hence the nickname "ODST Jacket." This jacket sports several improvements over the Ver 1 Assault BJ, more focused on enhancing the strengths of the Assault BJ. The ODST jacket sports stronger armor as well as more armor placement, the fields are also tuned to help cool the mage down (because it can get very hot, wearing a full bodysuit with armor and no ventilation), along with a redesigned helmet navigation and communication system; all of this comes at a weight penalty - the jacket alone weights 16 lbs. With full combat gear, an Assault Company mage will be carrying anything from 40 to 55 lbs of gear. The relative lesser weight of the armor (compared to similar types of conventional body armore) allows for more weapons, ammo and water to be carried by the wearer.

Spoiler for Defenses:

The ODST Jacket's defences consist of two parts: the magical defenses and the physical defenses. The magical defenses are the jacket's barrier and field, which are tuned to provide higher magical protection compared with other barrier jackets, and provide lesser impact penetration and blunt force protection. The physical defenses are the armor plates of the ODST jacket, which protect against bullets, blunt force trauma, and stabbing.

The ODST Jacket is thus in these respects superior to a standard TSAB Barrier Jacket, providing good protection against magical attack and excellent protection against conventional weapons, as well as looking cool. There are a number of disadvantages to this jacket, however. Being heavier than the standard TSAB jacket means that the wearer has to be physically fit. Also, the weight of the jacket is an issue in air combat, due to the fact that since it makes the wearer heavier (due to carrying loads of stuff), users are less manuverable in aerial combat (this is less of an issue, however, given that the Assault Company are for the most part incapable of flight). Lastly, the final reason this jacket will not see mass-deployment is simply because it looks far too dangerous and scary, which is at odds with the image of the friendly mage here to help that the TSAB tries to project.

Or as the Sergeant Major puts it, "Those Mid pussies can't take the badass."

Lieutenant Jaeger doesn't care. All he cares about is that it'll keep him alive with he accidentally shoots himself with a grenade launcher. Again.

You missed the Olympian Powered Armor Exoskeleton in your 'most protective'... considering:

Originally Posted by Cooper, Chapter 3. MSLN Test Dummies

"It has all the standard defense measures of a barrier jacket, but also solid armor made of reinforced tungsten carbide and titanium alloy. If an enemy is strong enough to break through a barrier, a shield, and the barrier jacket standard defensive response, he'd still have to deal with two centimeters of solid armor plating if it were a chest shot. The best part is that it's magic forged, so it's triple density thanks to the precision in which the molecules could be laid out. I rechecked it twelve times to be sure... these plates are FLAWLESS. No cracks, no fatigue, no stress weak points. I LOVE Magic Forged steel."

I should call the Triple density Tungsten Carbide, Titanium plating... 'Cooper Steel'. Or 'MEGA-Steel.' Or something equally catchy.

Otherwise, I like your 'light' jacket. :wink: