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Old 2010-06-21, 18:09   Link #25561
00-Raiser
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy C View Post
Looks good. I have no further suggestions.
Thanks for all the help! I've gone and uploaded it

@Satashi: A! Cuz after Einhart's deadly cooking, she's in no shape to be training

Vivio has a dango plushy, eh? You've been playing too much Clannad

Also, I wanted to see Vivio chew out Rio for blabbing about her crush!
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Old 2010-06-22, 01:28   Link #25562
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I agree, Vivio need to have some rest. I choose A
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Old 2010-06-22, 16:32   Link #25563
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Future Tense

Chapter 4: Discoveries


Previous chapters can be found here.

Spoiler for Future Tense, Chapter 4: Discoveries:
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Old 2010-06-22, 16:45   Link #25564
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Teana? Oh dear, the world really has gone to hell in a hand-basket, huh?

Dammit! This is too good! I wanna know more!
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Old 2010-06-22, 17:30   Link #25565
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I seriously like this. Really gives off a great dark vibe like BetrayerS! Keep up the good work, Kaijo!
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Old 2010-06-22, 18:46   Link #25566
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@Satashi: Put my vote down for A.

@Kaijo: I wonder just how messed up Teana's become since the incidents. >.> If its enough to cause Fate to freak out at an insinuation, then it can't be all that healthy for anyone involved.

I'm still trying to figure out which one of them is Puck...
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Old 2010-06-22, 18:52   Link #25567
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Anyone remember that one plot bunny that I posted about 700-odd pages ago?

Anyone? Anyone? No? Okay, it was this one.

It's being written. And it just updated yesterday with chapter 2. Thought you guys might like to know.
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Old 2010-06-22, 18:55   Link #25568
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Comartemis View Post
Anyone remember that one plot bunny that I posted about 700-odd pages ago?

Anyone? Anyone? No? Okay, it was this one.

It's being written. And it just updated yesterday with chapter 2. Thought you guys might like to know.
Oh damn, that is the most epic description of a fic ever.
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Old 2010-06-22, 19:01   Link #25569
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This series of questions got booted out of the Q&A Section, so I'm copy-pasting it here. And yes, it's a potential fic idea.

Any conjectures on the TSAB's method of Faster-Than-Light (FTL) travel? It seems to possibly use portals of some sort... Do you think it's a type of hyperspace? Or maybe subspace or sliptream space (Slipspace)? Or something entirely different?

Second: To those of you who know of the Halo verse. Read up on Halopedia's entry on Slipstream Space, and tell me if you think the usage of slipspace, and the methods used by UNSC and Covenant ships to enter and exit the slipstream (noting that UNSC methods for entering slipspace are much more brutish/haphazard/violent than Covenant methods - butcher knife compared to scalpel, and all), would be classified as the "dimensional disturbances" that the TSAB are usually tasked with investigating and mending. And if so, what the TSAB would do in response.

For that matter, how would the TSAB look upon / think about / respond to the practically-one-sided massacre that is the Human-Covenant War? Or the Flood? Or the titanic Lost Logia network that is the Halo Array and the Ark?
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Old 2010-06-22, 19:05   Link #25570
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For that matter, how would the TSAB look upon / think about / respond to the practically-one-sided massacre that is the Human-Covenant War? Or the Flood? Or the titanic Lost Logia network that is the Halo Array and the Ark?
They wouldn't like it but they probably wouldn't intervene. The Human/Covenant war is neither a multidimensional issue nor the issue of a member world so it doesn't fall into their jurisdiction. That might not stop a few stubborn heroines from "taking a vacation" to the world in question and lending a hand -- strictly off the record of course -- but the bureau's main forces wouldn't get involved.
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Old 2010-06-22, 19:05   Link #25571
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Originally Posted by DKN117 View Post
This series of questions got booted out of the Q&A Section, so I'm copy-pasting it here. And yes, it's a potential fic idea
Isn't "booted out" a little nasty? Seems Tempy was very friendly to you with your question, honestly.

Quote:
Any conjectures on the TSAB's method of Faster-Than-Light (FTL) travel? It seems to possibly use portals of some sort... Do you think it's a type of hyperspace? Or maybe subspace or sliptream space (Slipspace)? Or something entirely different?
My knowledge of MGLN technology is definitely lacking, so you might be better off asking Keroko or Dezo about this, but as far as I know, there's no explaination for exactly how the TSAB's ships travel, other than "plug in coordinates and appear there in a badass fashion". It's never been fully explained by any canon source, so it's something people play around with.

If I'm wrong, anybody feel free to correct me. I'm kind of testing out unfamiliar waters here.
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Old 2010-06-22, 19:07   Link #25572
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DKN117 View Post
This series of questions got booted out of the Q&A Section, so I'm copy-pasting it here. And yes, it's a potential fic idea.

Any conjectures on the TSAB's method of Faster-Than-Light (FTL) travel? It seems to possibly use portals of some sort... Do you think it's a type of hyperspace? Or maybe subspace or sliptream space (Slipspace)? Or something entirely different?

Second: To those of you who know of the Halo verse. Read up on Halopedia's entry on Slipstream Space, and tell me if you think the usage of slipspace, and the methods used by UNSC and Covenant ships to enter and exit the slipstream (noting that UNSC methods for entering slipspace are much more brutish/haphazard/violent than Covenant methods - butcher knife compared to scalpel, and all), would be classified as the "dimensional disturbances" that the TSAB are usually tasked with investigating and mending. And if so, what the TSAB would do in response.

For that matter, how would the TSAB look upon / think about / respond to the practically-one-sided massacre that is the Human-Covenant War? Or the Flood? Or the titanic Lost Logia network that is the Halo Array and the Ark?
*Picard facepalm*

Write something. It doesn't matter how much you write. If you don't write anything, how else are we going to give you feedback in return?
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Old 2010-06-22, 19:46   Link #25573
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaijo View Post
Future Tense

Chapter 4: Discoveries


Previous chapters can be found here.

Spoiler for Future Tense, Chapter 4: Discoveries:
Error in quote as always. There's only one this time!

Hm, damn you for being so vauge and cryptic! Who was Fate sent after I wonder? Teana seems a lot different already, what with her licking her lips and hanging on Wendi like that.

Another good chapter. I see you're chugging along with this fic, meaning I need to get my own ass into gear if I want to prempt you on something I know is coming!
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Old 2010-06-22, 19:47   Link #25574
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I don't like starting a fic without having my facts straight, only to receive a TORRENT of corrections and "actually"s and "this is wrong"s. I prefer to have everything sorted out and understood before fingers hit the keyboard.
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Old 2010-06-22, 20:03   Link #25575
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaijo View Post
Future Tense

Chapter 4: Discoveries


Previous chapters can be found here.

Spoiler for Future Tense, Chapter 4: Discoveries:

Hmmm... okay, for Fate, I'm guessing she was sent after Carim. At the very least, she's the only 'old friend' I can think of with an ability that Hayate might consider worthwhile.

And evil Teana, now? Evil Teana who's dating Wendi, of all people? To me, this says that Subaru is probably among the dead...
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Old 2010-06-22, 20:19   Link #25576
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Originally Posted by DKN117 View Post
I don't like starting a fic without having my facts straight, only to receive a TORRENT of corrections and "actually"s and "this is wrong"s. I prefer to have everything sorted out and understood before fingers hit the keyboard.
Look, the more established writers in the FFT have all made countless mistakes, but does that stop them from writing? No. They cop it on the chin, take the advice and feedback given to them, and made the necessary corrections to their fics. Heck, a few months ago, when someone came up with a plot idea, he had the good sense to actually provide something for the regulars here to give feedback on. Sure, what was originally written was more of an info dump, and there were some errors in terms of continuity issues, but once everything was pointed out, that person thanked everyone who gave their feedback, and rewrote the original idea into something that was much more presentable.

If that person could cop it on the chin and use people's feedback to improve himself without getting afraid of being "attacked", as you've elegantly put it many months ago, why can't you do the same?

A writer who does not write is not a writer.

Last edited by OZ7UP; 2010-06-22 at 20:33.
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Old 2010-06-22, 20:22   Link #25577
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Originally Posted by DKN117 View Post
I don't like starting a fic without having my facts straight, only to receive a TORRENT of corrections and "actually"s and "this is wrong"s. I prefer to have everything sorted out and understood before fingers hit the keyboard.
You know, in doing that, you're taking half the fun out of writing.

Writing itself is a trial and error process. Even if you work everything out in your head, there are still things you'll mess up; a story is like a living animal that way, because you can never predict it. Part of what makes a story become the final product, and what develops a writer, is getting things wrong and having other people point out those flaws. You wouldn't develop as a writer if people weren't there to critique you.

Just my thoughts on the matter.
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Old 2010-06-22, 20:49   Link #25578
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Originally Posted by Rising Dragon View Post
@Kaijo: I wonder just how messed up Teana's become since the incidents. >.> If its enough to cause Fate to freak out at an insinuation, then it can't be all that healthy for anyone involved.

I'm still trying to figure out which one of them is Puck...
Heh, still thinking this is gonna go like the Gargoyles episode, eh? To be honest, it's still one possibility. The great thing about how i have this plotted up, is there is a few ways I can go with it. But I might not go entirely the Gargoyles route, since I've included scenes that Nanoha wasn't a part of.

As for Teana, stay tuned for the next chapter or two... probably not so much next chapter, but the one after...

Quote:
Originally Posted by 00-Raiser View Post
Error in quote as always. There's only one this time!

Hm, damn you for being so vauge and cryptic! Who was Fate sent after I wonder? Teana seems a lot different already, what with her licking her lips and hanging on Wendi like that.

Another good chapter. I see you're chugging along with this fic, meaning I need to get my own ass into gear if I want to prempt you on something I know is coming!
Lick the lips was more of an act to get to Fate, as a bit of payback for Fate nearly blasting Wendi, but yes, she's changed, too. You'll see how and why coming up. ^_~

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Originally Posted by Moczo View Post
Hmmm... okay, for Fate, I'm guessing she was sent after Carim. At the very least, she's the only 'old friend' I can think of with an ability that Hayate might consider worthwhile.

And evil Teana, now? Evil Teana who's dating Wendi, of all people? To me, this says that Subaru is probably among the dead...
Heh, you make some interesting observations, and logical deductions. Time will tell if you're right or not. ;p

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Originally Posted by DKN117 View Post
I don't like starting a fic without having my facts straight, only to receive a TORRENT of corrections and "actually"s and "this is wrong"s. I prefer to have everything sorted out and understood before fingers hit the keyboard.
Gonna tell you this right now: no matter how well you plan, you're gonna mess up something. The good news is, writing really helps you nail down those points. For something like the cyborgs, writing them helps me understand them, their individual personalities, and how they relate to each other. having written all of them now (well, except for Sein who will get more screentime eventually) I pretty much know their personalities. Stuff like the Deed/Otto sister bond, or Dieci's more mellow outlook.

You write, you learn stuff. So get writing, and prepare to have people point things out. It's a good thing, because you'll learn!^^
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Old 2010-06-22, 21:01   Link #25579
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Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
You know, in doing that, you're taking half the fun out of writing.

Writing itself is a trial and error process. Even if you work everything out in your head, there are still things you'll mess up; a story is like a living animal that way, because you can never predict it. Part of what makes a story become the final product, and what develops a writer, is getting things wrong and having other people point out those flaws. You wouldn't develop as a writer if people weren't there to critique you.

Just my thoughts on the matter.
I can't really put it better but I'll throw in this. There's a reason people draft before calling something final.

Edit: Well lookie there I got another one
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Old 2010-06-22, 21:18   Link #25580
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I can't really put it better but I'll throw in this. There's a reason people draft before calling something final.

Edit: Well lookie there I got another one
and have alpha readers (forum peeps) and beta readers to correct stuff.

An example would be my AlternativeS. If not for the forum helping me and pointing out things, it would have stopped long before it got anywhere near as popular as it did. I owe all that to people here who critisized before it was actually done. I got to correct it before finalized :3

But hey, we all write differntly, so you're not wrong at all.
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