Infinite Stratos Character Creation and Fanfiction Discussion

[wavehawk]

Just to note: Kendo practicioners scream out the section of body they are aiming to hit, so:

MEN = Head/helmet
DO = Body/Chest Armor
KOTE = Hands/Gloves
TSUKE = Throat.

So I'm guessing "Chesto" is aiming for the chest. I only have a passing knowledge of Kendo, so don't take my word as fact.

[SRW-Otaku]

Originally Posted by demino_hellsin

You don't need a battle cry in actual combat as far as I'm concerned but generally they scream "MEN!"

Though with kendo its more of a declaration of where you hit with your shinai so there's a whole plethora of things they shout out when attacking during formal kendo. CHESTO could be one of them but I personally find it difficult to take anything seriously or intriguing when it's not used for comic relief or karate.

Yeah, it's kinda my fault. When my sister asked "what do kendo practitioners shout during combat", I thought she was going to do a SRW fic with Sanger, so I said "Chesto!". Communication fuck up on my end, really.

[wavehawk]

Originally Posted by SRW-Otaku

I thought she was going to do a SRW fic with Sanger

- ...this is the part where I bring up the "Growing Swords" of "Manly Men" and realize there was more to that miscommunication than just plain old missed communication, right? Oh god I'm evil.

That actually brings up another point. Even in a serious story, try to inject some comedy. Not slapstick; that's hard to do with the written word. But jokes, snarky remarks and the like give not only a boost of humor but a little more relatability to characters and their conversations.

[SRW-Otaku]

Originally Posted by wavehawk

- ...this is the part where I bring up the "Growing Swords" of "Manly Men" and realize there was more to that miscommunication than just plain old missed communication, right? Oh god I'm evil.

That actually brings up another point. Even in a serious story, try to inject some comedy. Not slapstick; that's hard to do with the written word. But jokes, snarky remarks and the like give not only a boost of humor but a little more relatability to characters and their conversations.

Yeah, Sis don't know how to make jokes on the fly. Hell, she can't even make a David Bowie dick joke! Who doesn't know how to do those?!

[wavehawk]

Originally Posted by SRW-Otaku

Hell, she can't even make a David Bowie dick joke!

- I don't.

I suggest stepping back from the fic first and just try to let the characters express themselves in your head. That might be easier for me to do because I've had both theater acting experience and am a known psychopath with schizoid tendencies. But I find it makes for more organic, real life conversations. Or entertaining ones at least.

Reading the fic again, I seriously doubt that Houki's first encounter with Cecilia woudl turn out exactly the same. Houki and Cecilia don't see eye to eye but their relationship would definitely come together very differently. It's a clash of personalities that makes the scene, and frankly I think it could stand to be a bti more dynamic.

[NatokoMizuki]

Originally Posted by SRW-Otaku

Yeah, Sis don't know how to make jokes on the fly. Hell, she can't even make a David Bowie dick joke! Who doesn't know how to do those?!

Uhm, those are irrelevant. I might be bad at humor, but I'm pretty sure you're pretty bad at timing.

[NatokoMizuki]

Originally Posted by wavehawk

- I don't.

I suggest stepping back from the fic first and just try to let the characters express themselves in your head. That might be easier for me to do because I've had both theater acting experience and am a known psychopath with schizoid tendencies. But I find it makes for more organic, real life conversations. Or entertaining ones at least.

Reading the fic again, I seriously doubt that Houki's first encounter with Cecilia woudl turn out exactly the same. Houki and Cecilia don't see eye to eye but their relationship would definitely come together very differently. It's a clash of personalities that makes the scene, and frankly I think it could stand to be a bti more dynamic.

How did you think it would actually turn out? I can use A LOT of advice right about now, as I only start writing fanfic again litterally since yesterday.
And please ignore my brother's nonsense, he's...a bit eccentric like that. And I really need advice on how to make characteristics pop in a non-visual medium.

[wavehawk]

First of all, remember that Cecilia's initial negative reaction to Ichika in the LN/anime was because she initially disliked or had no respect for men. Cecilia would still be standoffish to Houki, but the reactions will be different. You also advised that you want to change their characterizations a bit more and flesh them out further, so what I have in mind may not be what you're picturing. A Houki who's partly based on Nanoha may not react the same way as the LN canon Houki would in the same situation.

Just consider a less anime-ish or game-ish scenario. Think: Given Cecilia is like this sort of person, and when she meets Houki who is this other sort of person---how would that turn out. You can even base it on some real life experiences, like if you've seen two girls of similar characteristic argue or bump into each other, etc.

Just to note, I'll repost a segment of my fic, just to give you an idea. This bit is almost 80% identical too a scene in the original LN, but the way I reworded it and described the conversation makes it feel different. In this section, Ichika is still Ichika and Tatenashi is still the same, but I tried to give them both a bit more deptht han the original caricatures that they were in the LN.

There were heavy footsteps as Ichika slowly dragged his half-dead body to his dorm room. He sighed, possibly for the hundredth time that day. From keeping Laura, Rin and Cecilia from opening fire on one another to avoiding Houki's ire, the remains of his energy were drained from the day's practice session. In front of the room door, he wondered whether or not the girls were getting more out of the practice session than he was. They certainly spent more time duelling each other than training him anything new. If they were more like Charl, he began thinking. Then stopped as he recalled how dangerous a quietly angry Charlotte could also be. Nevermind. Just let me be alone for tonight.

At that moment, the door opened right in front of him.

"Ja-jaan! A wild Tatenashi onee-san appears~!"

"Oh. It's you." Ichika just look back dumbly at Tatenashi Sarashiki's peppy smile. At least she's fully clothed this time.

"Just 'oh, it's you'? That's so cruel, Ichika-kun!" Tatenashi replied in her charmingly joking manner. The trademark folding fan popped open, the words 'tease' written on them. "After all we've been through, is that the way you greet me?"

"I don't have energy left." Orimura shambled past Sarashiki, and just fell facefirst into the bed. There were only two possibilities in his mind: Either Tatenashi was going to tease him again, or she was going to put him through one more practice session. The fact was that he was tired. Too tired to even sleep, as he was still conscious of Tatenashi sitting beside him. The fan gently tapped Ichika's forehead, far more gently than he had been expecting.

Her scent. The familiar fragrance of her closeness soothed him despite Ichika's resistance.

"Ichika-kun?" Tatenashi's voice was oddly subdued this time. "Have you had any other childhood friends?"

A tired but still awake Orimura replied "...you're not going to suddenly make up some crazy story about how you're my third childhood friend, are you?"

"Now, why would I do that?" the fan popped open again to hide her fox-like smile, 'Honesty' written on it. Just as quickly it snapped closed. "Do you remember all of your childhood friends?"

"I'm too tired to make a list."

A giggle. "Then, who's the one you first remember?

"Houki." Ichika smiles despite himself, remembering Houki as a child. Sometimes he found it odd that he could not remember anything at all before his sister brought them to live with the Shinonono family, just as he turned five years old. But it had never really bothered him. Even if Rin and his other old friends Dan and Ran complained about how skewed his memories seemed to be on events.

"Would your childhood friends do everything they could to protect you?"

"I would protect them." Orimura said that absently, remembering the Silverio Gospel incident all too well. And of Laura, Cecilia, and Charlotte. "It doesn't matter how long I know them, I would protect them."

"But would your childhood friends do the same thing for you?"

"Houki would do the same for me. Rin, too. And probably even Dan and Ran--you don't know them." He was getting tired. "They're the only ones, I think."

The room went silent. Ichika felt as if Sarashiki were waiting for him to call out another name. She waited a minute longer before standing up.

"Tatenashi-san?"

"Good night, Ichika-kun." She waved goodbye with a smile on her face as she switched off the lights. "You'll be really busy in the future."

The remark puzzled his fatigue-addled brain. Ichika wondered why Sarashiki's cheerful voice sounded different, almost forced. But he quickly lost consciousness to sleep.

[Fireminer]

Hmm... Izuru does have a bright idea sometime.

Oh, and Wave, thanks for your efforts, but the submission I sent you recently didn't even make it to round 2!

[S-34]

What submission? Round 2?

[wavehawk]

I don't get the reference...

Oh lord. This is a bad joke but I think I need to adapt it to IS one day:

Images

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[S.Freedom]

Well Akatsubaki's pilot comes readily to mind.

Not to mention every female in IS's universe to some extent imo.

[lovetospoon73]

Originally Posted by S.Freedom

Well Akatsubaki's pilot comes readily to mind.

Not to mention every female in IS's universe to some extent imo.

Also either violent like chifuyu or perverted like Cecilia or a mix of both

[Saint X]

Current Thought Process: How to mix Bahamut and IS without turning it into a GATEstomp... or making it into a GATE-like scenario be more effective...

[eisai_haramasukoi]

Nope. it's gonna be Aldnoah Zero.

[Saint X]

I have yet to witness the full Capability of Bahamut's Old Empire Rebels (and their leader of course) as well as the Abyss so an Aldnoah Zero situation is a far from impossible.

[blitz1/2]

Originally Posted by Saint X

Current Thought Process: How to mix Bahamut and IS without turning it into a GATEstomp... or making it into a GATE-like scenario be more effective...

Easy, what's the potential for wincest and go with that.

[MeisterBabylon]

Lol hi Saintx

[Fireminer]

Originally Posted by blitz1/2

Easy, what's the potential for wincest and go with that.

Bahamut never go all the way with wincest.

Now remember it, how many shounen writer has the ball to do that?

[blitz1/2]

Originally Posted by Fireminer

Bahamut never go all the way with wincest.

Now remember it, how many shounen writer has the ball to do that?

Which is why the series needs an imouto patch. I can even make a plot from that.

1. Replace the onii-san with an onee-san (in case we need an onee-chan patch), and the reason why she caused the ruin of the kingdom is due to the possession of her divine drag ride why Lux has to cut her down.

2. Airi, the imouto is a political prisoner and forced to undergo monitoring while in the school. She HAS a mech this time (Leviathan, OC mech) while she is separated from Lux who is under the watch of the New kingdom's prison.

3. Using her political powers, the academy's principal frees Lux.

4. Lux bumps into the imouto, and you go from there. And of course, Airi and Lux become roommates. Lux knows that being from the Old Kingdom, Airi is subject to a LOT of bullying and is a loner, have Lisha attack Airi out of spite, Lux stands in and we have ep 1 duel. and we'll carry on from there.