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Old 2014-03-19, 03:14   Link #50961
Fireminer
Lumine Passio
*Author
 
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Hanoi, Vietnam
Age: 12
Or, a lot of them don't read the first chapter carefully.

Seriously, there are tons of great AU stories out there with low reptutation.

Maybe GBF: Polychrome and Monochrome could quite fit to this.
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Old 2014-03-19, 08:40   Link #50962
blitz1/2
Tenshi's Defense Squadron
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Fighting against those who oppress the system
Hmm, I may need a beta considering how many grammar mistakes I could find during my 4th time rewriting chapter 1 of ST remade.
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Old 2014-03-19, 08:51   Link #50963
demino_hellsin
That one guy
 
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Like real grammar mistakes or just uncomfortable to read kind of mistakes?
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Old 2014-03-19, 09:15   Link #50964
blitz1/2
Tenshi's Defense Squadron
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Fighting against those who oppress the system
Quote:
Originally Posted by demino_hellsin View Post
Like real grammar mistakes or just uncomfortable to read kind of mistakes?
A little bit of both. I keep mixing up some tenses.
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Old 2014-03-19, 09:28   Link #50965
demino_hellsin
That one guy
 
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
I always had a hard time with the whole "use only one tense" rule. Writing does become awkward when you mix the two but sometimes the events in your head just feel difficult to word out properly

My biggest problem is that I tend to repeat sentence structures too much so reading it feels tedious.
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Old 2014-03-19, 09:33   Link #50966
Fireminer
Lumine Passio
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Hanoi, Vietnam
Age: 12
Try to ask someone from the forums on Fanfiction.net.

You know, it's weird that almost every fanfic I've read always use past tenses, while present tenses would be the correct one.
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Old 2014-03-19, 09:48   Link #50967
ZeroXSEED
I am no one
 
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
Past tense for third person

Present tense for first person

That's the easiest way to do it, third person implies narration of what happened, while first person actually tell everything in real time.
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Old 2014-03-19, 09:52   Link #50968
Fireminer
Lumine Passio
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Hanoi, Vietnam
Age: 12
Say, could a man really develop a resistance to poison by cosuming bit by bit of that poison everyday, with a gradually rising quantity?
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Old 2014-03-19, 10:04   Link #50969
demino_hellsin
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Join Date: Nov 2011
I personally find the whole present tense thing a lot more intriguing and thrilling to read about.
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Old 2014-03-19, 10:09   Link #50970
blitz1/2
Tenshi's Defense Squadron
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Fighting against those who oppress the system
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fireminer View Post
Say, could a man really develop a resistance to poison by cosuming bit by bit of that poison everyday, with a gradually rising quantity?
Yes. But, I think in the end, the liver may end up giving up.
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Old 2014-03-19, 10:15   Link #50971
Tempest35
Awe of She
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Orlando
Hmmm, had a weird scene of Ichika and Squall together...

Something to do with a raffle (and Chifuyu being away at a conference) and getting Ichika for a day, and somehow, Squall heard about it and entered her name into it - and won. Instead of trying to take him away immediately, she just flirts with him - treating him to a high, privileged lifestyle. A classic case of 'Flirting with the Enemy'. Of course, I doubt if Squall would mind 'acquiring' Ichika for her own.
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Old 2014-03-19, 10:17   Link #50972
demino_hellsin
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She's bi. Chifuyu has to come with the package so she can complete the fabled legendary mythical Orimura harem set.
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Old 2014-03-19, 10:18   Link #50973
ZeroXSEED
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
What blitz said

Magic resistance is overrated, just like 'human potential'

But to a degree it's true, for example, anesthetic specialist somewhat resistant to lesser anesthetic due to years of exposure.
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Old 2014-03-19, 10:22   Link #50974
blitz1/2
Tenshi's Defense Squadron
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Fighting against those who oppress the system
Quote:
Originally Posted by ZeroXSEED View Post
What blitz said

Magic resistance is overrated, just like 'human potential'

But to a degree it's true, for example, anesthetic specialist somewhat resistant to lesser anesthetic due to years of exposure.
well, it's physiological tolerance, hence why we don't use too much narcotics for long term pain therapy, instead to use for short term.
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Old 2014-03-19, 10:26   Link #50975
demino_hellsin
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Join Date: Nov 2011
Oh yeah, an idea for a unit. It's simple really, an Uchigane with a remote bit unit. Only the remote bit unit is another IS. Though again technically not another IS.

Uchigane Kagemusha
- the unit sports heavier armor than the original Uchigane, almost 3 times as much. There are more armaments though with 2 katanas and an old black powder styled(aesthetically) gun called Hikigane. Though I would like to add more weapons I'm not sure what more would make sense to add

To explain the bit unit, the key is in the layers of armor. It's not there to act as defensive measures for the IS though it very well may be. The armor is actually designed to come apart from an inner armor frame which stays with the pilot. The outter armor becomes a separate frame that is remotely controlled by the pilot.
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Old 2014-03-19, 10:29   Link #50976
Fireminer
Lumine Passio
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Hanoi, Vietnam
Age: 12
Remember the Jim Jones case? I imagine Ichika drinking what he believe to sedatives, but really is a mix of harmful substances - and when PT capatured and tried to poison him, it didn't work. However, after consumed all these lethal stuffs, his mind broken. Giving PT another chance to use him.
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Old 2014-03-19, 17:46   Link #50977
ZeroXSEED
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
Chalk it out to pilot's weird biology, and keep it consistent.

In mirrorverse, the fact that Ichika managed to heal from moderate burn injury in less than 4 days is a miracle, and the doctor suspect "Probably a pilot" even though Ichika is in fact, a male.

Normal; human would take at least 10 days to heal from same wounds.
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Old 2014-03-19, 17:55   Link #50978
blitz1/2
Tenshi's Defense Squadron
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Fighting against those who oppress the system
Posted first chapter of remake onto fanfiction.net.

@Zero: 10 days, most people here in my hospital nearly take a month lol.
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Old 2014-03-19, 18:01   Link #50979
ZeroXSEED
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Inside your head
My apologies, it was a widespread superficial burn, his wounds appear like major sunburn than anything else.

This is the wizardy of Absolute defense, things that absolutely lethal and crippling will be turned into something that can be treated easily.
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Old 2014-03-19, 18:48   Link #50980
Akisa Akimune
L'anticipation du pouvoir
 
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Nowhere and everywhere
Quote:
Originally Posted by blitz1/2 View Post
Posted first chapter of remake onto fanfiction.net
Yahoo! Youpi!

By the way, what do you think of a fanfic about Ichika X Honne?
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