Nanoha FanFiction Discussion

[MeisterBabylon]

...you didn't see anything here...

[Rika23onROOF]

.................................................. do you really wanna know?

[MeisterBabylon]

I... er... eeeeeh... Ah yes I forgot I need to go check on something!

*fleeeez*

(Times like this I realize that Nanoha would be cooler if she was like Bernkastel and Skeith like Hanyuu )

[Sheba]

Originally Posted by Rika23onROOF

.................................................. do you really wanna know?

We all know.

[yuiseppe]

Originally Posted by RadiantBeam

So... yeah. Short hiatus is short. Stuff happened today, and I suddenly got the urge to write, so I did. Lutecia-centric, short, some spoilers for another part of Lutecia's as of yet unseen past as a Shadow.

Spoiler for Two People:

Lutecia knows how many people have died on her, because honestly, she’s only lost two who ever really mattered. She never thinks of who she’s killed, and she spares a moment of silence for the nameless Shadows she didn’t know well enough to fully mourn.

But for her, two people changed her world.

Miranda is a given. Miranda was her partner, her sister, her best friend in the world of Shadows and the NSIS. Miranda was when her innocence truly began, and Miranda was when that same innocence ended.

Miranda’s death is simple, quick, and painless. Miranda bleeds to death in her arms, red stains her hands and warms her fingers, and the light goes out of Miranda’s eyes like someone’s switched off a lamp. Miranda goes still and limp in her arms, she smiles and she dies with Reflecting Wish a broken mockery of what she was, leaving Lutecia with nothing but memories and a tangled dragonfly key-chain that her boyfriend doesn’t want.

It is a death that makes Lutecia quieter, colder, a death that makes her driven and a death that begins the path of her inevitable breakdown oh so many years later. But Miranda’s death was just the first.

The second death is Dave. Dave, the young four-year-old son of the man who ordered the hit on Miranda and Lutecia. Dave, a young boy who is too innocent to understand Shadows and darkness, a little boy who looks up to people like Takamachi Nanoha and Fate T. Harlaown and somehow has copies of Superman from Earth, which he reads religiously, and out loud to Lutecia when she visits (to spy on his father). Dave is innocence and light in a body too tiny to hold it all, and Lutecia wonders what she did to deserve him.

Dave’s death is simple, quick, and full of fear and pain, a sense of betrayal and confusion. Dave is killed by his own father when he rushes back into the house when the man has pinned Lutecia to the wall with his summoned wolf beast and blood is dripping from deep bites on her chest and sides. Dave loves his father but knows that hurting people is wrong, it’s wrong and Superman would stop him, so he tries to stop him, because he wants to be like Takamachi Nanoha and Fate T. Harlaown, he wants to be like Superman who is strong enough to save everyone.

And his father tearfully picks the boy up and snaps his neck.

Lutecia screams and cries, she begs, but it’s over in an instant and Dave’s lifeless body is dropped to the floor like a doll, his face forever frozen in shock and childish disbelief.

(That was the only reason she let the man live, in the end; forcing him to live with the sin of killing his own son was much, much crueler than killing him.)

Miranda has a grave, and Lutecia visits it on a regular basis, leaving flowers and other tiny trinkets. She doesn’t talk much, just stands there quietly, contemplatively, hands in her pockets as the wind blows by. She always brings the key-chain with her, but she can never bear to leave it behind and promises herself that she’ll do it next time she visits (she never does).

Dave has no grave; he died young, and the shame it would bring to his family prevented him from having a marked tombstone, but Chrono insists that the boy at least have a marker. Lutecia only visits on his birthday, bringing tiny news clippings about Nanoha or Fate and a new copy of Superman every time. She sits and reads it to him, much the way he used to do to her.

During the day she lives, and she remembers their deaths as a life lesson and a cruel reminder that sometimes the good die first, and innocence always ends.

At night she dreams, and she’s strong enough to save them both and live happily ever after.

Spoiler for Author's Notes:

1. If anyone following my shorts and series at this point doesn't know who Miranda is, I'll slap you. Just kidding.

2. Dave is a character that I've contemplated creating for a recent idea I had detailing the aftermath of Miranda's death and the mission Lutecia took to bring in the man who ordered the hit. Yes, he's a kid. Yes, his death is violent and cruel. Because I was in one of those moods.

Bravo!! I thoroughly enjoyed the presentation - simple and to the point despite the emotional value of what was said. It's just how I'd imagine Lutecia to sound like when she reflects upon her life.

...and where has Allquall gone? :'<

[Rika23onROOF]

Originally Posted by Sheba

We all know.

(^//////^) nyahaha don't worry, I don't think I can do what that Rika did.

...but

...*smirk*...if you want to...i'll pull your's out...or is there anyone out there wants to volunteer...hehehehe


*cough* *cough* anyway I'm not that Rika Furude. She is one of my most favorite characters, cute with her NIPAAAA~

[Kaijo]

Originally Posted by spawnofthejudge

What I mean re: framing device. Right. The story is actually about the pasts of the Wolkies, right? So the framing device is how you end up telling that story. Example. In Clannad ~After Story~, there was a 'clip show' or summary of the whole series, which is normally rather boring, but I thought the framing device (the ep was introduced as Tomoya telling a story to Ushio) made it interesting enough that I wasn't bored. Your framing device for the story of the Wolkies' past is through this prick villain bothering Rein's subconscious, and sucking in each of the Knights one at a time and bothering them with their pasts.

With me? Good. I don't like it. I think there are much better ways to tell this story. I don't think your story is bad (interesting take on the Signum/Agito question, for instance), but the way it is presented rubs me the wrong way. It's probably my isolated opinion, though. (I prefer... interesting things in my looks into the past. See my Wolkies' past look The Many Masters of the Malevolent Manuscript under my pseudonym Dracis Tran if you want to see what I mean).

Okay, I get what you're saying, and to a degree, I agree with you. I don't feel it's turning out quite as well as I'd hoped, but I partially chalked that up to my perfectionist standards that's rarely happy with what I write. I needed an impetus to link both the Wolkies origins, and the corruption of the book. I felt using an internal threat was better than an external threat.

But as for actual execution, I'm still not quite happy. I may go over and redo several sections, depending on how the rest shapes up.

Anyway, thanks for the feedback!

[Satashi]

AlternativeS Chapter 1 (AS rough draft) AlternativeS Chapter 2 (AS rough draft)

Spoiler for Alternatives 3-1:

Spoiler for NSFW image (pantsu):

I awoke with a start, eyes snapping open as I felt an arm snake around my side. There was movement behind me and I almost grabbed the hand moving up my front to break its fingers before I remembered that Fate-chan had fallen asleep in my bed. Although I was content to sleep on the couch, I ended up thinking the bed would be big enough for both of us, and thus I had simply claimed the left side as my own while letting her sleep. Now Fate was behind me and my breath caught in my throat as her hand slipped in between the snap together buttons on my night shirt. I felt her palm touch my stomach and slide upwards, popping the catches loose as it went up. 'Wait!' my mind was functioning but my body wasn't listening. I could feel Fate's other arm slide under my pillow and her breathing against my hair. Her leg slid between mine and bent at the knee, raising upwards until I let out a small squeak at the feeling. 'St...stop, I'm not ready!' My mouth wouldn't open and my heart was thumping hard in my chest, right under the palm that was pressing on me enough to be considered a loose hug. The movement slowed down until it stopped altogether, Fate's gentle snoring now being muffled by my hair. I still couldn't seem to move my body, however, and I stared across my bed with wide eyes and a pounding heart while being embraced from behind. 'I'm... scared to move.'

AlternativeS III
By: Satashi

Nanoha gazed over the pink and white pillow her cheek was resting on and watched the sun rise through the extra large windows that made up most of one wall. Fate was still asleep behind her, breathing peacefully against her hair in a steady rhythm. Just as the sun's rays started to creep onto her bed, the radio on her nightstand cut on to deliver the sounds of a popular song.

Fate groaned at the noise and shifted as she tried to wake up. "Few more minutes..." Her request was mumbled lightly while stretching out. The brown haired girl suddenly found it easier to breathe as the hand went away from her chest. The warm body behind her moved and rolled over onto her back, allowing Nanoha to sit up and look down at the girl. "I was sleeping so well, too..." Red eyes struggled to open as the blonde sat up as well, looking over at Nanoha with a glazed expression.

"Ah, g-good morning." Nanoha manged out, hand going to grip both sides of her nightshirt to close it enough to snap together. "You can go back to sleep, you don't have to get up this early."

Fate looked at the girl blankly before sighing out. "For a moment..." Her sentence trailed, eyes looking away.

"...I'm sorry." Nanoha felt a small pain in her chest. "I... thought you would like to sleep in this bed. I- I was going to sleep on the couch but thought the bed was large enough to..."

Realization dawned on the blonde's face. "I have really bad sleeping habits. I'm sorry, did I make you uncomfortable?"

"N-no!" Nanoha lied frantically, waving her hands. "I didn't even realize it until I woke up! Uhm, I-I'm going to get dressed now, you can go back to sleep."

"Eh? No, I promised I would help you train remember?" Fate moved so she could crawl off the bed and stood up in a long stretch, revealing her tone stomach as the tank top rode upwards. "I don't have spare uniforms to wear so I guess I'll put on the standard 6th Division one Hayate gave me... I don't think it would be wise to walk around in my enforcer outfit when I don't hold the rank displayed."

Nanoha watched the girl move to the closet and open it, taking out both of their clothes. "Um, thank you."

"At the risk of sounding rude, would you like help getting dressed?" The blonde smiled happily, offering the clothes to Nanoha.

"N-No!" Nanoha shook her head, blushing hard. "I can get dressed!"

"Ah, okay." Fate nodded in understanding. "I'm sorry, I'll just go change in the bathroom, okay?" Giving a small wave over her shoulder, Fate turned to go on her way.

The girl on the bed opened her mouth to protest but the memory of Fate's palm on her chest made her stutter out incoherently and allow the blonde to leave. 'Oh wow... I haven't been this embarrassed since...I don't know when.' Turning on the bed, she gripped the bars offered to her by Raising Heart and moved into her chair. 'I've never been held like that before... I don't think I slept more than an hour the entire night.' a light sigh came as she opened a drawer to get a change of underclothes.

Nanoha's hand paused over the garments, a thought running through her mind that made her ears turn a light shade of red. 'I'm still so excited about Fate-chan paying so much attention to me... The way she held me so casually while she slept, is that what its like to fully trust in someone? I wonder...' Before she could change her mind, Nanoha shifted through the drawer and found a bright, neon pink pair to put on. Wheeling herself to her closet, she opened a drawer and shifted through her old skirts, finding one that she wore when she was a little younger and not quite as tall. 'I feel so dirty all of a sudden.' The though made her giggle while changing clothes, getting situated just as Fate came back into the bedroom.

"About ready?" The blonde asked lightly while smoothing out her skirt and double checking her pantyhose.

"Ready, just need to do my hair." Nanoha got a hair band and began to scoop up the mess of hair to pull up before Fate popped her hands lightly, making her let the brown hair drop.

Fate picked up a brush from the nightstand and moved behind Nanoha, making the girl give up control of her hair and quickly started coming it for her. "I swear, you really need to take better care of your hair; you'll get split ends if you don't brush it properly." After being allowed to treat the tangled mess, Fate brought it up and combed the strands back to make a perfectly centered cheerleader-style high ponytail. "There, perfect."

"I feel lopsided," Nanoha complained slightly, looking in the mirror and seeing the hairstyle.

"Because the side of your head weighs so much you have to balance it out with a mop of hair." Fate smiled at her joke and moved to push Nanoha's chair before realizing that there were no handlebars there. "Ready now then?"

"Yes," Nanoha moved her palm over Raising Heart and glided down the ramp leading to the ground floor. "And we still have time to get there before everyone else."

As the two made their way out of the building and to the training field, Fate inhaled the crisp morning air deeply. "One thing that doesn't change is the tranquility of the morning."

"Yeah." Nanoha nodded in agreement.

Fate hummed to herself as they passed the few people that were out so early and wondered why they all looked away from them. "I wonder what's wrong?"

"What?"

"Everyone we pass looks down at you then glances away."

"I have no idea." Nanoha almost sang the words before stopping to turn to face Fate. "What do you think?"

Fate glanced down and almost did a double take. "N-Nanoha!"

"Yes?" She tilted her head to the side lightly.

Fate leaned down to her and whispered to her frantically. "Your skirt is too short, you can see your panties!"

"So?" Nanoha smiled cutely up at her.

"But... but...!" The blonde stammered back in shock, unsure of what she just heard.

"Fate-chan won't let anyone look." Nanoha reached up and touched Fate's nose in an open flirt. "So I can wear this small skirt, right?"

"N...No! No you can't!"

"Why?" Nanoha tilted her head lightly and gave her best innocent eyes. "A little peek never hurt anyone."

"Because!" Fate shook her head. "I don't want... You just... Don't!"

Spoiler for AlternativeS 3-2:

Nanoha smiled brightly, eyes shining with happiness. With that, she turned and began moving again, smiling even more as Fate suddenly began walking in front of her. 'I don't think I will ever get tired of this feeling.' Her palm snapped back on her control orb when Fate stopped walking, forcing her to come to a sharp halt. "Fate-chan, don't stop so suddenly." Moving around her, she looked at what made the blonde hesitate. "Well I'll be. Teana and Subaru are already practicing."

Fate looked at her watch and smiled to herself. "In my world your training session starts as soon as they get to the field, regardless if you are there or not. Those two took it upon themselves to make the most of their time, not because they are supposed to, but because they both desire something."

"What's that?"

Fate began walking again, subconsciously shifting in front of Nanoha again. "Teana has a goal of being recognized. She wants everyone to know what a Lanster is capable of. Subaru..." The girl hesitated her words. "In my world, she idolized you because you showed her how to be strong... however, I don't think you could have been there when that happened..."

"I met Subaru a long time ago," Nanoha revealed as she went to her instructor's podium near the field. "She had her arm broken after being in an airport that was on fire. Poor thing was seriously hurt..." Nanoha looked over at Fate with a questioning glance.

"I know she's a cyborg."

"Ah. Then you'll understand. I heard her crying as I was visiting someone else in the hospital. I felt like I needed to help the small girl, even if I didn't know her. When I went in, she tried to hide, thinking I would consider her a freak if I saw her exposed wires. She was older than I thought she was, but she was crying so hard I felt as if she needed more of a talking to rather than pampering. I stayed and talked with her for a few hours, listening to her story and in turn sharing mine." She patted her legs to imply which story it was. "When it was over, she said she was amazed I didn't give up being in the military. When I told her I would never give up on something that meant a lot to me and my friends, she seemed really awed. I told her if she took that path like her family did, I would personally train her and... well, here she is."

Fate felt a small bit of contentment in her chest at hearing the story. "Good, its nice to know some things still work out okay. Tell you what, I'll head to the field and play with them. Would you mind setting up something for us?"

"Sure," Nanoha brought up her monitors with the help of Raising Heart. "What would you like?"

~**~

Hayate looked up from her desk when a knock at her door came. "Come in," she addressed curiously. When Fate walked into the room she smiled and stood to greet her. "Hello, Fate-chan."

"Hey," Fate saluted the girl. "Nanoha said she had some things to take care of so I thought you might want to get lunch together. Do you have time?"

"Certainly." Hayate reached back to get the purse from her desk. "Where did Nanoha-chan run off to?"

Together, the two made their way to the door. "She said something about needing to shop in town. I offered to go with her but she insisted to go alone."

Hayate glanced over at her new friend as they rode the elevator down to the first floor. "Your tone seems a little...miffed. Did something happen?" When the blonde looked away, Hayate was about to say never mind, but when the small hints of a blush came along with fidgeting, she pressed on. "Seems like an interesting story."

"How do you always know when things are interesting?"

"Sixth sense, get used to it. So tell me, what makes the girl from another dimension upset at my little Nanoha-chan?"

Fate waited until they were outside the building and heading to the parking lot nearby before answering. "It's silly." Her weak attempt at not explaining was deflected almost at once, leaving her no choice but to go on. "It's just that... Nanoha is purposely riling me up today."

Hayate unlocked her car and looked over the top of it. "Nanoha-chan? Purposly upsetting someone? Sounds a little weird to me." The two got in and closed the doors before getting comfortable. "What is she doing?"

"Well... Yesterday I made a comment that my Nanoha is a little...well... she's not exactly shy of her body. She likes to flaunt it, mostly in short skirts and letting people catch little glimpses of her underclothes. Anyway, your Nanoha seemed embarrassed at first but I told her how it always made me so frustrated, trying to make sure nobody saw my wife, you know?" Propping her chin up on her palm, Fate stared out the passenger side window as her friend drove them into town. "Today she wore bright flashy panties and a skirt that is so short its really perverse. You can see her plain as day and she took every opportunity she had to make me stand in front of her."

Hayate took a moment to let this soak in, blinking several times as she tried to absorb this information. "Wait, so Nanoha-chan... Is purposely flashing people?"

"Just to make me get embarrassed," Fate finished the thought for her.

"Because you told her that's what your Nanoha did?"

"...I guess, it makes the most sense. She told me that she knew I wouldn't let anyone see her, so... I mean, I know its none of my business, but she's still Nanoha, even if she's not my Nanoha, you know? I can't just... let someone see her."

"I see..." Hayate sighed out. "She seems to have taken a liking to you."

"...Yeah."

Hayate looked over at the blonde before turning her attention back to the road. "Should I talk with her about it?"

Fate didn't answer for a long time, rolling the question over her head and all the possibilities it could hold. After a while, she finally replied with what she thought was best. "We probably shouldn't worry about it; I won't be here for too much longer, hopefully, so it shouldn't be a problem."

"My boyfriend agreed to help us figure this out-"

"Boyfriend!?" Fate looked at her in shock.

"...Do I not have one in your world?"

"Well, you dance around with Yuuno but-" When Hayate grinned at her, Fate felt a bit of pride in her chest for the girl. "Well I'll be. I wonder how me not being here effected that."

"Not sure, but he's very interested in you. I'm sure we will get you home."

"...Thanks, that means a lot." The two shared a pleased look before turning to gaze back out the window and listen to the soft music playing in the car.

~**~

Nanoha hummed happily to herself as she placed a bag of clothes on her bed. 'I got Fate-chan enough to last her a while, I hope she likes them all.' Taking out the garments, she held up her choices again. A few shirts that were light enough to be worn in the summer but still warm enough to last through the changing seasons they were going through. A few skirts were placed on the bed as well, followed by underclothes that she hoped would fit the girl's ample chest. 'Well she did say she liked black so at least it was easy to match things up.' Her attention turned when a familiar rhythmic tapping came on her door. "Come in, Hayate-chan!"

"Hello, hello!" Hayate waved as she entered the room. "I saw you pull in from my window at the office so I thought I'd see where you ran off to, leaving your little puppy all on her lonesome."

"Vita-chan can handle training just fine until I get there." Nanoha stuck out her tongue. "She's not a puppy."

"Follows you around as much." The two shared a giggle at the inside joke and Hayate sat on the bed. "Oh, doing some shopping?" She held up a shirt and whistled at it. "Wow, nice brand. I really like the design."

"I got it for Fate-chan, she can't afford anything to wear yet."

"I see." Hayate looked down at Nanoha and sighed out lightly. "You know, you really should change skirts."

"Why? I like this one." Nanoha laughed to herself. "Its amusing."

Leaning forward, Hayate propped her elbows onto her knees and thought for a moment. "You know, I didn't really believe it when I heard, but seeing you actually doing it is rather unnerving."

"What do you mean?" The girl turned her chair to face Hayate directly. "What's wrong?"

"Nanoha-chan..." Judging her words, the girl met her friend's eyes. "I think you're getting a little too clingy on Fate-chan"

Nanoha blinked in confusion, then laughed. "What do you mean? She's lonely, she needs someone to be there for her. I'm her wife-"

"You're not her wife, Nanoha-chan." The sudden firmness made Nanoha instantly pay more attention to her. "First you let her carry you around, then you let her stay in your room overnight, and now you're... exploiting her to get attention."

"I'm not exploiting her! What makes you say that!?" Nanoha moved closer to her, eyes and tone of voice clearly stating she was displeased in the word choosing.

"Nanoha-chan," Hayate reached out to take Nanoha's hands. "I know she's lonely and all, but you're the one who's craving the attention. You don't even know her, yet you're doing everything in your power to make sure she's always thinking about you. Don't you think that's a little unfair to Fate-chan?"

"I don't see what you mean."

"For goodness sakes, Naoha-chan!" Hayate raised her voice in an exasperated tone. "You're flaunting your panties like a cheap hooker just because Fate-chan said your other self did it!"

"If I was flaunting them, its none of your business!"

"You're only doing it so Fate-chan will protect you!" Hayate made sure Nanoha's eyes were still on her. "Did you already forget why Fate-chan fought Lexus the other day!? He was treating you like a tramp and she went and fought him just because she wanted to protect your image! And here you go, flashing everyone because it makes you feel special to have someone who will look out for you. That's insulting to Fate-chan's meaning isn't it!?"

"That has nothing to do with this!" Nanoha let go of Hayate's hands angrily. "Could it have crossed your mind that I want people to see them!? I don't exactly have a lover you know. If it gets me attention from someone who already likes me, what's the harm!?"

"If you wanted to attract someone, you would have done it in another way! You're doing this because you know it would give you attention from her! There's a differnce!"

"Even if I was what gives you the right to tell me not to!?"

Hayate stood and threw her arms out. "Nanoha-chan, listen to yourself! you're defending yourself like this has been the way you are for years! You're trying to be someone you're not just so Fate-chan will look at you. don't you see a problem there?"

"NO!" Nanoha shook her head. "I do not! Listen, we're not all lucky enough to have the love of our lives so casually stroll into our lives and click into place like you did. I was given a second chance, Hayate-chan! Somewhere out there, there is a person just like me who has this perfect woman who loves her more than anything and is living a happy life that could be mine!"

"Exactly!" Hayate cut her off harshly. "And that person wants her Fate-chan back! We're all working hard to send her home while you're pawing her up! She loves that Nanoha, and you're trying to become her!"

"...Leave."

"Nanoha-chan, I just-"

"Please leave." Nanoha turned around and went silent, staring at the floor.

"...I'm sorry I yelled." Hayate walked over to her friend and put both hands onto her shoulders. "Please, Nanoha-chan... I just don't want to see you hurt, okay? I love you." Leaning over, she kissed the brown hair in front of her. "I'll tell Vita-chan to cover the entire lesson for you, so please try and-"

"Hayate-chan," Nanoha's words broke. "Just... just please leave."

"...Okay." Hayate gave the shoulders a squeeze and left the room, rubbing the bridge of her nose while trying to wipe away tears before they formed. 'That could have gone a hell of a lot better...'

Nanoha slowly raised her hands, letting her chair shift forms so she could brace enough to move to her bed. Sitting there, she picked up a black and gold bra that she had picked out for herself and looked at it a few moments before tossing it to the foot of her bed. 'I am being myself,' She thought, moving so she was face down onto a pillow. 'I'm not doing anything I don't want to, Hayate-chan just doesn't understand what its like to be alone...' Pressing her face against the pillow harder, she felt a small damp spot appear near her eyes. 'I'm not so desperate for love that I'd change who I am just for one person am I?' Her breathing broke when a sob came from her mouth. 'I didn't put myself on display just for her, I did it because I... I...' Pulling the pillow closer, she used it to muffle her crying as it slowly started to overtake her. 'I'm so pathetic...'

Spoiler for AlternativeS 3-3:

~**~

Nanoha felt a hand on her head and slowly opened her eyes when a petting motion was made. "I assume," Vita's voice came from beside her. "That you didn't just fall asleep after a shopping trip?"

"Mm." Nanoha stayed laying down, face half buried in her pillow.

"You going to start talking or am I going to have to sit here for a while?" Vita scooted so she was sitting right in front of the laying girl and leaned back, propping her hands up behind Nanoha so the girl couldn't roll away from her.

The blue eyed girl sighed out and wrapped an arm around Vita's waist. "Vita-chan, do you think I'm a bad person?"

"Everyone has a moment where they do something bad. Its what we do after it that's important." Her tone was light, casual as she looked up at the ceiling. "What did you do that's so bad?"

"I'm... trying to cheat."

"Cheat what?" This time the smaller girl looked down at Nanoha's face and noticed that she had been crying.

"Fate-chan."

"Ah, I finally got to talk to her today. Seems like an okay person, I guess. How are you cheating her?"

"... I'm... Its hard to explain."

"Then start talking." Vita rolled her eyes. Nanoha smiled lightly and pulled the girl closer. "You know, normally the person doing the hugging is the one trying to comfort."

"I prefer this." Nanoha took a deep breath. "Fate-chan is from another universe or time-line or whatever, right?" She was hummed at. "So, I was talking to her and... Well, she's married to me over there."

"So I've heard."

"I just... kind of latched on to that...I don't know, I was just looking for someone to love me and all of a sudden this girl appears that I'm supposed to be with... I guess I tried to skip the whole 'fall in love' part of relationship and jumped straight into the 'you'll understand everything about me' part."

Vita looked back at the ceiling and kicked her legs lightly off the bed. "You do realize she isn't going to stay here, right?" The arm around her waist pulled her closer. "I see."

"I'm a bad person."

With an annoyed sigh, Vita began patting Nanoha's hair again. "Nanoha, don't be stupid. It is a strange situation and you acted the way you did because you were... I don't know, but you did it. If you feel sorry for it now and know you made a mistake, why dwell on it?"

"Grown ups are complicated."

"I'm older than you." The remark made Nanoha smile again and Vita moved a strand of hair from the closed eyes. "Nanoha, just be yourself. Do what you want because you want to. Just because there is a woman who is telling you strange things doesn't mean that you are a different person. I don't think I'd like a Nanoha who was trying to be something that she's not."

"...Thank you, Vita-chan." Nanoha opened her eyes and curled around the girl. "Why is it you always know what to say to me?"

"If I knew, I'd use that to talk to Signum and Shamal to get them to stop treating me like a kid."

Nanoha smiled knowingly at the remark. "Be happy they care so much."

"Yeah, sure. Now, are you going to help me in tonight's training or what?"

Nanoha sat up and rubbed her eyes. "Yeah, I think I'll be able to. Thank you so much for covering for me."

"Its what I'm here for." Vita hopped off the bed and put a hand on her hip. "But I do want to say something."

"Yes?"

"Don't grab at smoke, you can't hold it."

The words made Nanoha look down a moment before meeting Vita's eyes again. "I want to try anyway, even if I know the results."

The smaller girl groaned and began walking away. "Don't expect me to buy the alcohol that night 'cause I ain't doing it."

Nanoha giggled and reached out to grip Raising Heart's offered bars to get into her chair. "Yes you will." She got a snort and the girl felt her spirits lift considerably. 'Even if I know she is going to leave... I want to experience this for what it really is... without cheating. '

Short because I have to go back to work I'll write a long post at lunch time!

[Nanya01]

Hooray! Vita-chan!

Why is it that our best friends who generally aren't good at giving comfort (or so they say) can give us the most comfort?

[SulliMike23]

Originally Posted by Nanya01

Hooray! Vita-chan!

Why is it that our best friends who generally aren't good at giving comfort (or so they say) can give us the most comfort?

Probably comes with the job.

[Rising Dragon]

Because we know they mean it when they try, as they're going the extra mile for us, that's why.

[Satashi]

So Vita wasn't too OOC? I tried to keep her as close to Vita-chanish as possible while still giving the advice needed :3

*waiting for Keroko to come in with NanoVita goggles*

[Rising Dragon]

I thought it was fine. Besides, since its an alternate universe where people developed differently thanks to the absence of Fate and other certain events, I think you can get away with characters being a little OOC.

[Rika23onROOF]

(^/////^)

you said it vita-chan! glad that AltNanoha finally understands it.

[Keroko]

Woo! A little bit of NanoVita! I is a happy NanoVita fan. :3 Now I wonder... could Nanoha's love perhaps be right in front of her all this time? A good friend who knows her so well, might just become more than just a good friend in due time.

This chapter see what made me see what you mean by being inspired by our debates on the forum. You can practically read our 'fated love' debate in the argument between Nanoha and Hayate.

[RadiantBeam]

I can get behind the AltS!NanoVita ship.

[BPHaru]

Originally Posted by Keroko

This chapter see what made me see what you mean by being inspired by our debates on the forum. You can practically read our 'fated love' debate in the argument between Nanoha and Hayate.

Oh, I had many things to say about the "fated love" topic, but I have been a bit busy lately and I didn't have time to have fun discussing it here. I barely can keep track of this thread now that is moving so fast

Anyway, thanks for another update Satashi, I've say it many times but I'll say it again: I really like that we're getting updates of this fic so often, that is great, I truly love this story

Now I'm leaving, see you later guys.

Cuídense y sigan sonriendo

[Tabasco]

Also finally caught up, did someone put something in the water while I was gone? Lots and lots of good news and excellent ficcing going on.

Anyway, going to break the chain here and not support a Nanoha-Vita ship because I can.

[D2]

Okay everyone, it's October 29th, and you all know what that means!

TWO DAYS BEFORE HALLOWEEN!

As I was reading around this thread, I couldn't help but notice that one genre that this board is lacking on is HORROR stories. While I do admit the awesome battle scenes that people write and some slasher stories *cough* Wallachia *cough* do contain suspense that makes me jump up and down with joy. I have come across many stories that deal straight up with the unexplained. Knowing this, I have made an attempt to inject some Halloween spirit into this board! Beware though, I'm afraid I still don't have the skills of dialogue writing down pat yet, so this story may seem more narrative than anything else. Don't be shy though! Read and Review please, and ENJOY!

P.S. I heavily recommend you play the music as you read, it really helps!

Time for:

Spoiler for Urban Explorer!Shamal:

Theme music:

Shamal yawned as she placed the last of her belongings into her bag, looking forward to a long night of sleep at Hayate's house. She clucked in annoyance as she looked at the clock which emotionlessly read 11:56 PM. It had been an especially hectic day, with the average amount of training injuries in addition with an especially hard day of combat practice by the Forwards, forcing her to stay longer taking care of patients, which resulted in a longer cleanup time. Finally, Shamal locked the door to her office and set out on the lonely journey toward the exit of the hospital, going slower due to most of the lights being shut off due to the time. As Shamal stepped into the hallway that would lead her to the lobby of the hospital and subsequent exit, she was stared aimlessly, thinking only of the cup of hot chocolate she would have before going to bed.

Then she saw it.

Shamal unconsciously stopped as she drew level with a small hallway that branched off the main corridor. She stared down the dark hallway, eyes fixed on the doorway at the end. It would have been inconspicuous, save for a few details. Most of the doors were electronically powered, made of the shiniest new materials, and were freshly painted. This door however, was still graced with a doorknob, and the paint showed obvious wear and peel. As Shamal continued to stare at it, her thoughts drifted back to that afternoon...

"Can I help you?" A voice behind Shamal inquired.

Shamal turned around to see an aging man in a janitor uniform, who was curiously staring at her.

"Um, could you inform me of what room that door leads to?"
A few minutes before, Shamal was walking down the hallway to file some folders when she came up upon the peculiar doorway, and was wondering both what was behind it and how it managed to hold her attention for so long.
The old man wrinkled his brows as he tried to think up the right answer, then something seemed to come to his mind.

"Ah, before this new hospital was built, there used to be an older facility that went a few floors above and below the ground. This part of the hospital that you're standing in was one of the few sections they held over to the new facility. Most of the old wards above ground were demolished to make way for the new ones, but many of the underground wards were left abandoned. I think that door is supposed to lead down to some storage rooms and the abandoned parts of the earlier hospital as well."

Shamal thanked the man, and went on her way, quickly forgetting about the forlorn door. Now however, as the clock struck midnight, she couldn't help but stare at it, wondering what lied beyond its worn frame. Before she knew it, Shamal was standing in front of the door, her hand reaching for the handle. While her mind was convincing her to go home, and to forget about her petty desires for midnight urban exploration, Shamal's body refused to listen, as if she were in a trance. Without pausing, Shamal stepped through the doorway.

That's when the stench hit her.

Shamal slightly recoiled as she recognized the scent of mildew wafting up from what appeared to be a set of corroding stairs. Squinting at the darkness, Shamal bade Klarer Wind to provide her a ball of light, and went down the stairs. Once she reached the lower level, Shamal finally managed to take in her surroundings. She was in what appeared to be a long hallway, with several doors on either side, how long it went was lost to Shamal because the light from Klarer Wind was unable to reach to the end. The first thing she deducted was that NO ONE had been down here in a very long time. What remained of the paint on the walls were peeling off, and the bare walls were darks with water stains and mold. While the floors did hold various bits of trash, none of it seemed recent because most of it were in various states of decay themselves. The roof was lined by several pipes, and insulation hung down from them like icicles. Taking a deep breath, Shamal started walking down the hall. She promised to herself that she would walk to the end, then turn right around. Quickly however, she soon realized that the hallway was longer than she thought, and the stairway quickly vanished from her sight. Shamal kept walking, only pausing to peek inside several doors. Most of them were empty, save a few pieces of trash, but Shamal knew that they were once patient rooms. Shamal contemplated on the rooms as she walked by.

"Who once stayed there, what conversations occurred between the sick, the dying, and their loved on-"

CRUNCH!

Shamal jumped as the sudden sound broke her train of thought. For what seemed like hours, Shamal just stood, and strained with her ears to hear anything else. But it was dead silent. As Shamal moved her foot to begin walking again, she noticed that she had evidently stepped on some type of... sound recorder? Curiously, Shamal bent down and picked up the peculiar device. Indeed! It was some kind of tape recorder, and a VERY old one, since it evidently still used the plastic reels. Her nerves calmed again, Shamal looked forward and noticed a wide open door, and that it was slightly larger and darker than the other ones. Shamal walked up to it, but the paint on the door was too faded to see what the figures said. Shamal walked inside, and the first thing that came to her mind was: Boxes. Boxes upon boxes of files were stacked on top of one another in what now seemed to be a file/AV room of sorts, and numerous papers were scattered all over the floor and walls. Shamal glanced at some of the papers, and noted with a wrench that they were all patient files. Shamal's heart ached as she took in the various papers, x-rays, and other pictures that once represented the memories and lives of people, now lying forgotten and gathering dust, just like some of the actual patients that stayed here.

Shamal exited the room, and kept walking forward, only pausing to take a glance at a room that seemed to be filled with bathtubs, labeled: Hydrotherapy.

On, and on she walked, it seemed like the hallway was stretching onward and onward, and Shamal was seriously contemplating on maybe just turning around, when a cold breeze passed over her left shoulder. Shamal wrenched around and stared back at the empty black hallway behind her, but felt nothing but an increasing sense of nervousness. Shamal chastised herself for being so jumpy, and turned back around. As she started walking, she slowed down again as a sound made its way to her ears.

Drip... Drip... Drip...

Shamal's eyes narrowed as she identified the sound, until now, Shamal had heard absolutely nothing beside her own soft footsteps and nervous breathing. Strangely, Shamal couldn't lock onto where the sound was coming from, it seemed to come from all directions, echoing off the walls, and as Shamal started moving forward again, the sound didn't get louder or softer, it remained at that soft but unmistakably clear volume, just out of reach, but definitely able to be felt. Now with the sound of water to keep her company, Shamal started quickening her pace, seeking to leave as quickly as possible, when she noticed a small object at the very edge of the light Klarer Wind was shining out, laying on the ground. Shamal stopped short as she came up to the item, a small doll, lying face down. The doll was in just a sorry state as the rest of the building, the cloth that made up its clothing stained and some internal stuffing poking out. Shamal picked up the doll and turned it so that the face was staring up at her, and her eyes widened in surprise as she saw its angry expression.

"Hmm... why would a child want a doll that loo--"

Shamal wrenched her head toward the movement at the corner of her eye. The general direction of what seemed like a moving shadow led her vision to settle on a corrugated steel door that was partially hidden in the shadows just past the light provided by Klarer Wind. As Shamal stared at the door, a million thoughts were running through her mind,

"What was that? was I just seeing things? did I cause that motion by moving? WHAT'S INSIDE THE DOOR?"

The last question resonated inside her, and inevitably drew her toward the gaping entrance. As she stared inside, Shamal felt as she was standing at the mouth of some giant monster, that seemed to eagerly await its food. She could feel its breath, a cold breeze that chilled her to the bone that reached out from the depths of the room and wrapped itself around her. Taking a deep breath, Shamal stepped into the void. As soon as Shamal stepped inside the room, she was taken aback with the sudden change in temperature, as it had suddenly gone very cold, almost to the point of where she could see her own breath. While the air had felt damp in the hallway, the air inside the room also seemed heavy, and settled down on her like a blanket, it was depressing. As Shamal looked around the room, her mind raced as she recognized several open refrigerators, several oven-like compartments, and an operating table.

Shamal was in the morgue.

Shamal was silent as she stared at the compartments that once held frozen corpses, although most of the compartments were shut, enclosing their contents, several were open, giving Shamal access to their thankfully barren interiors. Her inspection of the refrigerators did not go as lucky, as Shamal clearly saw the labels on several jars that remained on the shelves,
BRAIN SLICE, LIVER SAMPLE, KIDNEY SAMPLE, BLOOD SAMPLE: Biohazard.

All of the seals on the jars looked unbroken.

Shamal quickly removed herself from the area of the refrigerators and moved on to the exam table. Shamal curiously took note of the materials that were haphazardly strewn on the surface. While the majority of the knick-knacks seemed to be materials you would find on any sort of exam room such as needles, scissors, and pliers, there were also screws, electric paddles, a lobotomy pick.

Seeing nothing more of interest, Shamal decided she had had enough, and headed back down toward the exit. As Shamal started encountering doors and various items she identified near the stairway she had originally entered through, she started walking at a faster pace, looking forward to finally leaving this accursed place.

Shamal ground to a halt.




Resting in the middle of the hall, pointed at an angle, was a chair. It wasn't a special or unique chair by any means, just an ordinary patient wheel chair sitting in the middle of the hall.

What was disturbing though, was that Shamal did not recall seeing ANY chairs during her entire time down in the lower ward. As Shamal ran her underground journey through her head, she did not remember any obstacles lying in her path. Shamal's neck hairs pricked up as she stared at the innocent looking object, wondering where it had come from, for all the rooms around it were empty when she checked them before. Now becoming more nervous, Shamal scooted around the chair, and made her way to the foot of the stairs that would lead her out.

"SQUEAK!"

Freezing, Shamal turned around and looked back at the chair.

It hadn't moved, at least, it didn't look like it had.

Shaking her head, Shamal rushed up the stairs, and finally made her way back to the hallway that separated the new hospital from the abandoned section. Shamal sighed in relief and turned around to close the door.















For undisclosed reasons, Shamal took the next day off.

[spawnofthejudge]

Originally Posted by Satashi

So Vita wasn't too OOC? I tried to keep her as close to Vita-chanish as possible while still giving the advice needed :3

I think it's borderline; you can explain it away as alternate universe, but it would only take a few tweaks, I think, to make Vita not skirt that line. (After all, it's hard to argue that based solely on Fate's absence Vita would change overmuch)

Originally Posted by RadiantBeam

I can get behind the AltS!NanoVita ship.

*waves a NanoVita flag*