2012-09-22, 12:24 | Link #37221 |
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That was an excellent chapter Kaijo. The way everything seemed to be going right for our heroes, only to come around against them in the end was superb writing. And more combat would be delicious.
Otto and Arf really stole the spotlight for me. And nice job with the bomb, I wasn't expecting that little twist and it worked out really well. And I can't wait to see more of the baddies' motives. =3 Well done comrade. I'm looking forward to the continuation.
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2012-09-22, 14:05 | Link #37222 |
Left for TFF
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Warning, next part is kind of dark.
ViVid Revolution Start Spoiler for Blood That Flows - Revolution 2:
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2012-09-22, 14:52 | Link #37223 | |
Big Damn Lurker
Join Date: Feb 2011
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Also I guess Lina has to travel to that mazoku's staff, as she doesn't have a reputation there. Now to see if Rio can survive. This green gas or the place itself, kind of omnious... makes one wonder wha could be on that place, a piece of Chaotic Blue or the Azure Dragon's soul, perhaps? On a random note, I disegree with your choice of name for this arc, as Revolution is also one of Slayers arc's name. Last edited by Filraen; 2012-09-22 at 21:02. |
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2012-09-22, 15:56 | Link #37224 | ||||||||||
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
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Belated response to the latest chapter of Swords and Shields!
(Leave me alone. Between my parents moving in with me, and this new job, I really don't have the same kind of free time or energy anymore.) Kudos for this very interesting, original idea for an archaeological discovery. It's almost as good as a library, and in some ways better. I imagine you can learn a lot from a civilization based on how they educated their children. Quote:
Seriously, Yuuno never displays anything resembling enthusiasm or joy in regards to anything one might consider a passion or hobby or calling. We never see his eyes light up for anything, not even the Library -- which gets a "isn't that nice?" response at most. It's one of various reasons why his detractors accuse him of being bland and boring. Quote:
Yuuno doesn't once seem to think about his previous romantic (sexual?) relationship with Nanoha as a possible reason for Nanoha to get jealous. Quote:
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On that note, ANY attempt to look into what the Belkan Empire was like, and give ANY thought to its pre-instellar (and even pre-global!) eras, is really admirable. Quote:
Even if there were other classes to rival it, they would not be Cradles, because they would not be the flagships of surplus Kaisers. Quote:
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Is this true of your Leave of Absence story's background, as well? It would cast in a new light Nanoha's amused reaction about the pregnancy rumor regarding Yuuno and Hayate. Quote:
If Yuuno had been capable of the kind of passion he's showing Signum, would he and Nanoha have fallen out of love? Wouldn't there have been SOME bridge between their different areas of enthusiasm? This whole thing started because Yuuno was willing to give Signum the challenge she desired. Yuuno and Nanoha have sparred in the past, and Nanoha's fights with Signum can get damn messy. Would Yuuno have never tried to give Nanoha the same "Zenryoku Zenkai" attitude in their own fights? Not so much trying to dominate her as to challenge her to new heights of "giving your all"? Quote:
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Oh, and... Turns out there's some ridiculous forum-feature where you have to go into your settings and CHOOSE for the forum to save the PMs you send. Otherwise it deletes them. |
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2012-09-22, 18:04 | Link #37225 | |
GregOS Offline
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Philippines
Age: 36
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Spoiler for MST3K review:
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2012-09-22, 20:24 | Link #37226 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Pennsylvania
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Hello all. I am new here to the forum but I have read many of your stories over the years. I even have one of my own that I think some of you might have read. MGLN origins that is going into the back story of Hayate and her knights more. Its more of an AU with Vivid and Force now out.
Had a little plot bunny stuck in my head for a while. No, no, no........ This can't be. Shamal stared at the screen horrified by what she saw. She had given the young girl the forwards picked up along with a relic while enjoying a day off a clean bill of health when she decided to search the database for the child's mother. Mid-Childa being the advanced society that it was had a secure data base for storing DNA identification for health and law enforcement purposes and Shamal was certain the young girl had a relative out there somewhere. What she found struck much closer to home than she ever thought possible. "Klare wind run the scans again," Shamal said as she triple checked her results with a growing sense of dread. The results still hadn't changed as a partial match for the girls mother flashed on the screen. Dam it ...... "Mistress are still in the office," Shamal said telepathically. "Hayate frowned as the short message floated through her mind. She had slowly weened her family away from calling her mistress over the years, but they still called her that when it was serious. "Yes Shamal what is it," Hayate replied. "Where are Fate and Nanoha," Shamal asked. "They went home for the evening why," Hayate replied. "Good," Shamal replied as she headed towards Hayate's office. "Shamal what is going on, is Nanoha relapsing," Hayate asked worriedly over their link only to receive silence. "Shamal what is going on," Hayate asked as a distraught Shamal hurried into her office sealing the door behind her with a soft green glow. "Mistress Hayate," Shamal said in full knights armor layering more barriers around the office effectively sealing it in a temporary pocket dimension. "I have discovered who that girl's parents are." "Shamal that's great, so what is with all the barriers," Hayate said with a smile. "Shamal what's wrong, is she the daughter of some one higher up in the bureau." Hayate asked as a diverse mixture of emotions were displayed on Shamal's face from disgust, horror, confusion, and fear. "Do you remember how long Nanoha was in the hospital after her injury," Shamal asked. Hayate fell back into her chair as if struck by Vita's hammer. "Almost a year, no, no, no, no. Shamal please tell me this is one of Vice's jokes." Hayate pleaded. "I'm afraid not, Mistress. The girl currently sleeping in the infirmary is the daughter of the Aces, but there is more." Shamal said. "Vita, Signum, Zafira, I don't care what you are doing now, go to the infirmary and stand guard over the child immediately. No one goes in or out except Shamal and myself am I clear." Hayate ordered over her mental link with her knights. "Yes, Hayate, was the resolute if confused reply. "Tell me everything," Hayate ordered. "She is a clone mistress, she has a partial match for the DNA of Fate tesstarossa, Yuuno Scyra, and her mitochondrial DNA is a perfect match for Nanoha." Shamal replied. "English, Shamal," Hayate asked struggling to keep her anger in check. "Do you remember that movie Jurassic park we saw back on earth with the cloned dinosaurs." Shamal asked. "Yes vaguely, didn't they have to fill in the empty spots with some other animals DNA," Hayate replied. "Yes, and that is why the girl has some of Fate and Yuuno's DNA, and the egg the DNA was placed in was Nanoha's" Shamal replied. "Why Nanoha, why Shamal," Hayate said slumping forward. "She is one of the most powerful mages seen in modern times and the perfect vessel for the ultimate magical warrior." Shamal replied. "Fuck," Hayate replied. "They couldn't have." "Couldn't have what mistress," Shamal asked. "The saint's shroud case. It was stolen shortly before Nanoha's injury. Some one is trying to recreate the Saint Kaiser." What am I going to tell them. How am I going to tell them....... Hayate thought as the sun set over Cragan. "Nanoha, Fate" Yuuno called out as spotted his long time friends entering the headquarters of riot force 6. "Yuuno," Nanoha exclaimed. "What are you doing here." "A meeting with Hayate," Yuuno said. "You wouldn't happen to know why. "Nope and I've got a meeting with her to," Nanoha replied as the moved through the building. "I wonder what she wants us for," Fate added. "Hayate what's going on," Nanoha asked surprised by the serious look on her friends face. "Shamal seal the room," Hayate said encasing the room in layers of barriers and shields. "Hayate," Fate said as the room was enveloped in a green glow. Letting out a heavy sigh Hayate began. "I don't know any other way to say this but we have discovered the parents of the girl you rescued yesterday." "That's great," Nanoha exclaimed. "Hayate what's going on who are the girls parents," Fate asked. The walking lost logia clammed up as she looked over at her closest friends. "I'm sorry.... I didn't know.... I should have let Vita guard you like she wanted.... I'm sorry....." Hayate broke down sobbing. "Hayate, it's no big deal I'm completely recovered from that and I didn't even get a scratch yesterday." Nanoha said rushing to Hayate's side as Fate looked on confused. Yuuno went rigid as his famed intelligence quickly pieced the facts together while another section of his mind began reviewing every spell he knew and how to apply it in battle. "Hayate.... who ordered it," Yuuno spoke his voice hard. "Ordered what," Fate asked. "I don't know," Hayate choked out. "Yuuno, what's going on...." Fate asked shocked by the dark aura radiating off Yuuno. "Nanoha's special treatment during recovery," Yuuno replied. "Um... what does that have to do with anything.... I was just glad to get out of there when I did seriously 10 months was way to long especially after that relapse I had a month in......." Nanoha said pausing mid sentence. "Hayate... it's not true is it.... please tell me it's not...." Nanoha said tears starting to leak from her eyes. "It is.. the girl you rescued yesterday is your daughter, Nanoha....." Shamal said. "Who is the father.. who is the bastard...." Fate and Yuuno said together. "We don't know, but she is your's as well," Hayate said slowly regaining her composure. Fate and Yuuno did a double take before asking how. "We think she is a clone of the saint kaiser with parts of Fate's and Yuuno's DNA to replace the missing pieces while Nanoha's eggs and body were used to bring her to term. "Fate and Yuuno were soon engulfed by Nanoha in a giant three way hug as tears of sadness continued to flow. "Hayate who else knows," Fate asked. "Shamal and myself for now," Hayate replied. "Good keep it that way," Yuuno said. "When can we see her," Nanoha asked. "I'll have Signum and Vita bring her here," Hayate said sending a mental command to her two strongest knights. "Thank you," Nanoha said. "Nee Signum why do you think this little tyke is so important," Vita asked as they headed towards their masters office. "She apparently was carrying a relic and took out several drones before you found her yesterday." Signum replied as the child stirred in her arms. "Well lets hope she doesn't get any lessons from Nanoha. I don't know if Mid could survive. "There will only ever be one of that thing," Signum replied. "Yeah but what if she has kids. I bet they'll be blowing stuff up before they can walk." Vita laughed while Signum stopped dead in her tracks. "Signum whats wrong..." Vita asked as the newly awakened child looked up into Signum's eyes. "Who are you, and you gonna hurt me like the scary man," the child asked staring up at Signum with one red and one green eye that looked strangely familar. "No, I'm taking you to see some friends of mine who want to help you," Signum replied. "Really," the girl asked. "Yes," Signum replied as they continued onward. "Vita, I pray that I am wrong but if she is who I think she is we will carve a path of destruction the likes of which haven't been seen since the days of ancient belka." Signum replied. "Ok," Vita replied still confused. "Shamal drop the barrier." Signum called out. "I still don't get it why all of this trouble for one little brat." "Vivio's not a brat," the aforementioned girl said smacking Vita with a bright pink hand as they entered the room. The headed girl forgotten Vivio starred into the watery eyes of a blond haired woman with red eyes, a man with green eyes, and a brown haired woman who felt familiar. "You're not gonna hurt me like the scary man are you," Vivio asked holding on to Signum's leg. "No we would never do anything like that," Nanoha replied struggling to hold back her tears. "Um, ok.... can you do magic like me," Vivio said holding up a glowing pink hand. "Yes," Nahoha cried sending a floating pink orb over to the girl. "Wow, it feels like mine," Vivio said touching the glowing orb. "Can you teach me how to do that," Vivio said smiling as the orb flew around the room. "Vivio do you know who your parents are," Hayate asked as Nanoha picked the small girl up. "The scary doctor said vivio didn't have any parents because she was a bad experiment," Vivio said sadly as Fate moved next to Nanoha and gently stroked the girls hair. "But Vivio wasn't a bad experiment because she blew up the big meanie robots that came to take Vivio back inside, all I wanted to do was play a little more but my sisters had to go on a mission. Does this mean Vivio is a bad girl for blowing up the doctors toys." Vivio explained to the stunned occupants of the room. "Signum, I'm going to ......." Vita said telepathically to her fellow knight her rage slowly growing. "Get in line, they will rue the day they angered the walking lost logia. Ragnarok is not the most powerful spell I have, but that is for another time." Hayate said. "Yes mistress," they replied silently "No, Vivio is a good girl, and she has parents to," Fate said taking the child from Nanoha "Do you know who my mom is because you have hair and eyes like me," Vivio asked. "Yes Fate cried. "Mama Vivio said looking up at Fate. "Yes, Nanoha and Fate replied as Vivio's eyes brighten. "Mama," Vivio cried out doing her best to hug both of them. "Um, Mamas does Vivio have a papa since she has two mamas." Vivio asked breaking the silence. "Yes, Vivio has a papa," Yuuno said picking the small girl up. "Papa, Vivio cried wrapping her small arms around Yuuno's neck. While Yuuno and Vivio enjoyed some father daughter time Fate and Nanoha approached Signum and Vita. "Will you help...." They began. "You needn't ask our sword is yours. Who ever is involved will feel the wrath of the wolkenwritter." "That's if I don't leave them as a pile of ash at the bottom of a smoking crater," Hayate said. "I will find who is responsible and they will pay, even if I have to tear the TSAB apart." Well what do you guys think. I know it's not the greatest but I thought it could be an interesting idea. |
2012-09-22, 20:38 | Link #37227 | |
GregOS Offline
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Philippines
Age: 36
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And When will you update the MGLN Origin and your gunslinger girls(your so-called sequel) fanfic?
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2012-09-22, 21:16 | Link #37228 | |
Banned
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2012-09-22, 22:02 | Link #37229 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Pennsylvania
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Mega1987- I got a little side tracked by my stargate story between semesters but with the second to last semester of grad school going right now I'm pretty busy. I think I will try to get out some chapters on my MGLN origins fic first (right now I'm stuck on where to begin the next chapter) and then get something out for my gunslinger girl fic. What did you think of my little plot idea..... It's actually something I would like to use as part of a sequel to origins or a later part to it if I continue it through strikers
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2012-09-23, 08:26 | Link #37230 | |
GregOS Offline
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Philippines
Age: 36
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Quote:
And That's one way of getting a OT3.... Odin: We should run for the farthest Anti-SLB bunker, NEET. The white devil going Mama Baer is something we don't want to be near... Me: Right. *Fled the area...*
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2012-09-25, 02:42 | Link #37233 |
Queen of Tragedy
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Place of rocks and trees, and trees and rocks...and water.
Age: 33
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*dropping in*
For those who may still be reading... Crime Never Sleeps Part 15 “The worst things we do always are by our own choice.” New Part 1-4A New Part 4B New Part 5: Trial Day 1A New Part 5: Trial Day 1B New Part 5: Trial Day 1C and New Part 6 New Part 7 Part 8 and Part 9: Trial Day 2 Part 10: Trial Day 2 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Side Story: Raven Spoiler for Crime Never Sleeps, Part 15:
Spoiler for Author's Note:
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2012-10-01, 12:10 | Link #37234 |
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Greetings everyone!
September 28th was a rather special day. For those who don't know, it was the one year anniversary of Swords and Shields. To mark this occasion, I crafted a special gift for you all. The continuation of the bedroom scene from chapter 7. A special something for your reading delight and something to sate the curiosity you may have had so far as 'Did They or Didn't They?' Give a hand to Kuroi Hadou as well, who helped me along and kept it from turning into something awful. He demands mention of his evilness and his Dark Beta Powers as well. He is a bad, bad man... I hope you enjoy it and I'd appreciate any comments or criticisms you may have. Though given the mature nature of the content, PMs would be best if you don't feel like posting a review on Mediaminer. If you wish to read it, send me a PM and I will send you the link.
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2012-10-02, 18:05 | Link #37237 |
Left for TFF
Author
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Sorry for the delay.
Between new games, some fics, etc, my muse has been distracted. So, here's a new part to make up for it. Though... Due to certain people... I've been giving serious thought about not posting any more updates here. ViVid Revolution Start Revolution 2 Spoiler for Blood That Flows - Revolution 3:
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2012-10-02, 18:46 | Link #37239 | |
GregOS Offline
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Philippines
Age: 36
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Quote:
Spoiler for MST3K review:
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2012-10-02, 22:12 | Link #37240 | |
Big Damn Lurker
Join Date: Feb 2011
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On the chapter itself: Looks like Lina and Nanoha have drilled the basics of knowledge on Mazoku to Vivio and Arashi, (even if expected) well done for them. Though there's no mention of Chaos magic, I suspect it's just a slip of Vivio. After becoming the Pokedex Dragondex encyclopedia on UA-500's dragons it doesn't feel strange Thoth giving such big knowledge, still a bit surprising to see it though. However... Shut up! Let that go just this time! Uno and Jail are back? Though I'd rather have the not-cloned-(again)-flesh-and-bones version of them I can have hopes again for a meeting beetween Reinforce and Jail after both died(?) in StrikerS *nods* The last paragraph might use a slight reword (I understand Nove groaned and being glad for Jail's "return"/gift, but as those reactions are somewhat opposite of each other the paragraph feels broken. |
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authorshipping, befriending, fanfiction, interactive fanfiction, nanoha |
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