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Old 2009-12-03, 06:41   Link #20241
Thunderbird
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Originally Posted by 00-Raiser View Post
You can sleep when you're dead!

But seriously, if you aren't enjoying writing it, you don't have to continue it Above all, the point is to have fun We'll just enjoy what you've shared with us already
Quote:
Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
That wasn't an ending! You really got Hayate involved now, there's no way you can just end it there!

I'm just teasing, I'll keep going. I'm actually having fun trying to make a new romance work. I guess they just need a little push in the right direction. I just hope our little Mobile Section Six commander is up to the task XD
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Old 2009-12-03, 07:36   Link #20242
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thunderbird View Post
I'm just teasing, I'll keep going. I'm actually having fun trying to make a new romance work.
I know the feeling ^^ I started Vivio/Yuuno because the potential drama it would cause was very appealing and I wanted to see if I could make it be taken as a serious relationship. I never thought I'd be up to three installments of it! Guess this means I succeeded, though
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Old 2009-12-03, 10:11   Link #20243
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OZ7UP View Post
Damn, that's one heck of a backlog that I'll need to break. Well then...

@ Satashi's AlternateS: This is starting to get very interesting. I'm jumping on the Alt!Alicia/Alt!Nanoha ship. Hmmmm... Methinks that Alt!Alicia is actually Alt!Fate...

@ Nanya01's Day in the Life: Conspiracies abound, and it looks like Miyuki's not quite out of the woods... Well, that was an interesting second half to chapter 32, and I'd have to say that the chapter title definitely fits.

* looks at the rest of the backlog *

Huh. There's only one thing left to do.

BACKLOG BREAKER!!!

Ahem...

Right then, some time ago (last week, I believe), I posted the third chapter to my MGLN/Pride And Prejudice crossover, "It Is A Truth Universally Acknowledged...". Tabasco has given me his feedback on it and, as such, I rewrote most of the chapter, cutting out about 1300 words in the process. Am I happier with the re-write? Yeah, definitely. It's not exactly as humorous as I originally intended, but it's still better than the original version. Besides, by cutting out those 1300+ words, I do have material for future chapters.

Without any further delay, I present to everyone a re-write of the third chapter of:

It Is A Truth Universally Acknowledged...

A MGLN/Pride & Prejudice crossover

Genre: Romance/humor
Pairings: Subaru/Teana, possible Hayate/Shamal, standard pairings in P&P
Timeline: A year after StrikerS
Pre-story scenario: Hayate and Shamal decide to pay ex-Admiral Graham a visit in England. Teana is currently taking a short break from her Enforcer training and, without anything to do, decides to tag along and learn about the planet that Hayate and Nanoha are from. As for Subaru, well, 'nuff said.


Chapter 1
Chapter 2

Spoiler for Chapter 3, re-written:


Spoiler for A/N::
Hmmmmm, interesting changes. I like them. And hey, I don't mind seeing Subaru seem thoughtful. I always thought she had the potential for it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Thunderbird View Post
I'm just teasing, I'll keep going. I'm actually having fun trying to make a new romance work.
Oh, man, have I been there before. I only started with ViCia because I was tired of seeing Lutecia put in a love triangle and Vivio with OCs, and then somehow the idea of it evolved into a full fledged series with a backstory and character development!
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Old 2009-12-03, 10:27   Link #20244
Tabasco
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OZ7UP View Post
Damn, that's one heck of a backlog that I'll need to break. Well then...


BACKLOG BREAKER!!!

Ahem...

Right then, some time ago (last week, I believe), I posted the third chapter to my MGLN/Pride And Prejudice crossover, "It Is A Truth Universally Acknowledged...". Tabasco has given me his feedback on it and, as such, I rewrote most of the chapter, cutting out about 1300 words in the process. Am I happier with the re-write? Yeah, definitely. It's not exactly as humorous as I originally intended, but it's still better than the original version. Besides, by cutting out those 1300+ words, I do have material for future chapters.

Without any further delay, I present to everyone a re-write of the third chapter of:

It Is A Truth Universally Acknowledged...

A MGLN/Pride & Prejudice crossover


[/SPOILER]

Spoiler for A/N::
Jeez, make it sound like I befriended your poor fic, why don't you...

I like it better too, and what's wrong with a smart Subaru? One would think the girl would have to grow up sometime.
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Old 2009-12-03, 13:23   Link #20245
Thunderbird
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I wonder how...in depth I should go with all this...I guess it will depend on how Hayate plays things out hehe. Its 322am and I am still awake XD

Page claim for late night writing and because no one else has done it yet
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Old 2009-12-03, 13:28   Link #20246
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So Hayate is the deciding factor for how Yuuno and Fate's relationship develops?
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Old 2009-12-03, 15:27   Link #20247
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Looking forward to Nanoha's reaction when she realises what's going on.

... If she realises
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Old 2009-12-03, 15:30   Link #20248
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I bet it's all a clever trick by Hayate so she can get Nanoha all to herself.
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Old 2009-12-03, 16:18   Link #20249
Thunderbird
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Originally Posted by RadiantBeam View Post
I bet it's all a clever trick by Hayate so she can get Nanoha all to herself.
Hmmmmm....*ponders deeply*
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Old 2009-12-03, 17:20   Link #20250
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Originally Posted by 00-Raiser View Post
Looking forward to Nanoha's reaction when she realises what's going on.

... If she realises
Oooh I have got a situation in which I hope you will like. Till then here's the next part ^.^

Spoiler for Part 3:
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Old 2009-12-03, 19:07   Link #20251
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thunderbird View Post
Oooh I have got a situation in which I hope you will like. Till then here's the next part ^.^

Spoiler for Part 3:
Evil Matchmaker!Hayate is win. Nice touch including comments from users on this board

Quote:
"Its Ar-chae-o-lo-gy" Nanoha corrected "Its the study of dead bugs, dinosaurs, and animal bones" I turned my head and facepalmed "you know like that Indiana Jones movie I brought home the other week."
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Old 2009-12-03, 20:18   Link #20252
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thunderbird View Post
Oooh I have got a situation in which I hope you will like. Till then here's the next part ^.^

Spoiler for Part 3:
...

Why do I get the bad feeling that Emonoha is going to resurface at some point in this story? Or maybe it's just me.

I liked how Fate took the time to learn what Yuuno really does. I especially cracked up when she felt the sudden urge to correct Nanoha but was too tired to actually do it. It's kind of sweet, somehow.

And now Hayate has help. XD Oh, boy, the poor Wolkies...
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Old 2009-12-03, 21:58   Link #20253
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thunderbird View Post
Oooh I have got a situation in which I hope you will like. Till then here's the next part ^.^

Spoiler for Part 3:
EMONOHA IS A WIIIN! XD

And that was pretty clever of you to add what we said here not too long ago! XD

ARCHAEOLOGY AND YUUNO RULE...because it's not Archaeology if Yuuno is not involved...
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Old 2009-12-03, 22:08   Link #20254
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Fate and Yuuno's trip to the museum should be fun

Reminds me of my Ace Enforcer 2 fic where Fate and Yuuno go to the movies together. Fate's debating on what movie to see, really only having the option of a sappy romance (no action movies cuz she had enough violence in her day job), but she notices Yuuno's trying reeeally hard not to look at a poster for a documentary on ancient civilizations, so she picks that one.

I do think Fate would have some sort of interest in the field, considering her job has her encountering objects left over from these dead societies.
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Old 2009-12-03, 23:30   Link #20255
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Certainly possible, Vivio's fascination with ancient history probably came from somewhere, surely her origin couldn't explain all of it.

It would make sense that there would be references and such in Fate's home on various artifacts and dead worlds, the same way a lot of people in the professions keep reference material around outside of work.
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Old 2009-12-03, 23:34   Link #20256
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Then there's Hayate, who was shown as a bookwork from the moment we meet her. Being a special investigator would also have her encountering many Lost Logia, so I bet she has quite the interest as well. She has the added bonus of asking her knights for first hand information.

And then there's Nanoha, who, while not really 'dumb', is quite simple. That's why she became a combat instructor and doesn't take part in actual investigations. She's only good at blowing things up, not thinking about them!

So while there's Fate, Hayate, Vivio, Lutecia, Caro, Corona, Rio, and potentially more, the only person who doesn't share this interest with Yuuno is the one girl he wants the most!

Isn't it sad, Yuuno? ;_;
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Old 2009-12-04, 03:01   Link #20257
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The step from "Fate is an enforcer and might (note, might) encounter objects from dead civilizations" to "Fate has an interest in archeology" is quite a big one, to be frank. Not impossible for ficwork, but a bit... far off to be said so certain.

One of the things this fic points out to me is how little I know of archeology except that it is the study of human culture through old relics...

So now I'm curious, how does an archaeologist earn money?
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Old 2009-12-04, 03:13   Link #20258
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sponsors, i think. and whoever's paying him to dig if he was hired. not that they earn a lot anyway, or so i heard.
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Old 2009-12-04, 04:05   Link #20259
MeisterBabylon
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Real life, like MMOs, is where healers are seldom out of job.

But when it comes to digging bugs for a living, ask Alavon.
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Old 2009-12-04, 04:21   Link #20260
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@ Thunderbird: I wonder what you have,the story is interset to read.

well it''s me or everyone who write about Nanoha fiction made Hayate kinda playful evil at same time.

because all the story i read Hayate is like that.
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