Haruhi and Koizumi getting completely hammered and nearly raping Kyon is CUTE?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
It's way more tame, in regards to the fact we don't actually get to see it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CatzCradle
Ah, but he doen't get raped in the end.
That's like saying Denzel Washington as John Creasy in Man on Fire wasn't killed by the Mexican mobsters after he gave himself up in a hostage exchange with the mobsters for the girl he was supposed to guard.
I've been having a go at working on Volume 2's prologue. I haven't got that far, and what I have covered hasn't required too much changing, but I thought I'd post it before I go off for the night anyway:
Spoiler for Chapter 2 Prologue:
Quote:
Prologue
At a glance, Haruki seems like the type of guy who doesn't have a single worry in the world. He always idiotically charges straight forward, energetically blowing through each obstacle he comes across without any thought for the consequences, no matter how much trouble he causes for others. Unfortunately though, even this happy-go-lucky fellow has his woes. I say unfortunate because, given the circumstances, there could be few worse worries for him to have other than the thought that "The world is too mundane."
To him, “Non-mundane things" are any kind of supernatural phenomena, meaning he often thinks things like "I can't believe that I have yet to see even a glimpse of a ghost.”
I should also mention that the word "ghost" could be replaced with "alien", "time-traveller", or "esper." However, it is common knowledge that these things only appear in fiction novels. They simply don't exist in reality. Which means, as long as Haruki continues to live in this “mundane” world, he will continue to be bothered by this fact. The world is supposed to be like this; nothing out of the ordinary.
I have my own worries to. Recent events that I’ve been through have made my confidence in this fundamental fact diminish greatly.
Because I know these aliens, time-travelers, and espers do actually exist.
"Please listen to me; I need to tell you something very important."
"What?"
"Haven't you always wished for the existence of aliens or time-travelers or espers?"
"Of course I have. What’s your point?"
"In other words, the purpose of creating the SOS Brigade was to find these people. Right?"
"Not just to find them, but to be able to have fun together! Learn the secrets of the universe from an alien! Play hide and seek whilst hopping around in the past with a time traveller! Take as my bride a mysterious esper who can instantly tell my every desire! Just finding them isn't good enough! I want to participate in the act, not just be part of the audience."
"I would really much prefer to be the one who got to watch from the sidelines... *sigh*, whatever. But have you ever considered the possibility that these aliens, time-travelers, or espers might be surprisingly close to us?"
"Ah? What do you mean? Don't tell me you’re talking about Yuuki, Mitsuuru-kun, or Koizumi-chan? If it's them, then that's not really a 'surprise'."
"Umm... that’s exactly what I meant. It’s been them all along."
"Are you an idiot? It can't be that easy."
"I guess that is true. This would be too simple by normal fictional story standards."
"So tell me, who's the alien?"
"You would be very glad to hear this. Nagato Yuuki is the alien. Hmm, how should I put it? He’s an android servant of the Integrated something entity... or Data something entity... something like that. Basically created by aliens and given a body."
"Oh? Then what about Mitsuuru-kun?"
"Asahina-san is easy to explain: he's your time-traveller. Well, he’s a visitor from the future. There's no problem calling him a time-traveller right?"
"Oh? Then how many years into the future is he from?"
"I don't know this, he wouldn’t tell me that. Something about it being “Classified information”."
"I see."
"Really?"
"That means Koizumi-chan is an esper? Is that what you were planning on telling me next?"
"That is correct."
"Ahh."
Haruki’s eyebrows twitched violently whilst he spoke. He slowly breathed in some air and bellowed:
"DON'T SCREW WITH ME!"
Chapter 2 Part 2... you know the drill... EDITJOB GET!
Spoiler for tl;dr:
The next day, after school, I regretfully declined Taniguchi and Kunkida's offer to walk home with them - though I wasn't going to miss their snide comments about my figure - and reluctantly dragged my heavy feet towards the clubroom.
Haruki had already told me "You go on ahead!" and dashed out of the room with a speed which reminded me why the Athletics Club so feverently desired his membership. He's so fast... maybe he attached booster rockets to his feet? Is he excited because he's going to go find members for our group? Or because he's a single step closer to meeting aliens?
I slung my bookbag over my shoulder and unenthusiastically slouched towards the Literature Clubroom, thanking my Lucky Star lucky stars that he hadn't simply decided to kidnap me again.
------
Nagato Yuuki was already in the classroom when I got there. He was even in the exact same position as last time, and, just like yesterday, was ignoring my presence, his head buried in the book. I know this is the Literature Club, but doesn't he do anything besides read?
Silence.
"... What are you reading?" I asked, unable to stand the silence any longer. Instead of answering, Nagato Yuuki merely raised the book he was reading to show me the cover. It was lettered with flashy foreign words that I had no hope of understanding. I think it might’ve been some kind of science fiction book.
"Is it interesting?"
He pushed up the bridge of his glasses with a slight motion, and replied in an empty voice. "Unique."
I got the feeling he was just giving me any answers so I'd stop questioning him.
"...which part of it?"
"All of it."
"...guess you like books, huh?"
"Relatively."
"Is that so...?"
"..."
Silence.
Could I go home now?
As I placed my bag on the desk and moved to seat myself, the door flew open. Correction: It was kicked open. Brutally.
"Sorry about being late! It took a while to catch him!" announced Haruki cheerfully, marching in through the doorway and giving an airy wave to me and Nagato Yuuki. He dragged in somebody by their wrist - he'd gone and kidnapped someone else! - and turned and locked the door.
Click! The newcomer flinched at the ominous sound, and begun to tremble a little.
It was another boy.
And a ridiculously cute one at that.
He was small and slim; he looked like a middle school student playing dress-ups in a North High uniform. His brown hair was tousled in a childish kind of way, and his large puppy-dog eyes glanced around the room with a silent appeal for help. He reminded me a little of my little brother.
This is Haruki's "chosen candidate"?
"W-what are you doing?" the boy trembled. "W-where is this place? Why did you bring me here? W-Why are you locking the door?! Wha-"
"Silence."
The boy froze with a start at Haruki's sudden, imperious voice, and gave an involuntary yelp as Haruki pounced on him, a companionable arm around the newcomer's shoulders and a huge smile beaming on his face. "Let me introduce you, then... this is Asahina Mitsuuru!"
...
...was that the entire introduction?!
Silence engulfed the classroom once more. Haruki looked satisfied, as though he had already done his duty; Nagato Yuuki was, as expected, reading his book as though nothing had happened; and this mystery boy Asahina Mitsuuru was cowering, on the verge of tears. It didn't look like anybody was going to say something, so simply to break the silence, I opened my mouth.
"Where did you kidnap him from?!" I demanded, hands on my hips. Maybe being more forceful with Haruki would make him rethink this insanity.
"I didn't kidnap him! I just made him come with me!"
That's the same thing!
"I found him daydreaming in a second-year classroom. I go through the whole school during breaks, so I'd seen him before already. He's perfect for our plans!"
Plans? What plans? Wait, so that's where you've been going at breaks. More importantly, though...
"Hang on, that makes him an upperclassman!"
Not that he looks like one, but I'm not in any position to talk.
"What about it?"
I looked at him in disbelief. Don't tell me he really didn't see anything wrong with what he had been doing. He must have been behind the door the day they were handing out the brains. I guess being more forceful wasn't really working, either.
"Urgh, nevermind... uh, Asahina-senpai, right? Why do we need her for your club?"
"Just take a look!" Haruki slapped Asahina-senpai on the back with some force, causing him to stumble towards me. I took an involuntary step backwards, and Asahina-senpai ended up grabbing the edge of the table for support.
"See how weak he is?" Haruki declared. "See how easily he's defeated? What he needs is guts! Guts and courage! If you have those, then you'll never be beaten, but if you lack them, then you'll never amount to anything! You won't be worthy of being called a man!"
That's really not very nice, Haruki.
Haruki grasped the air with his fist “Therefore, this will be our club’s first project! To turn this runty weakling, this non-man, into a man to be envied by all! A man among men!”
My initial thoughts were that Haruki had gone so far off the deep end he'd come right out the other side. He did have a bit of a point though... Asahina-senpai was probably the least manly man I'd ever seen. He'd be pretty popular with some girls, though. And at least he wasn't as crazy as certain unnamed individuals.
“Hey, that’s t-too mean!”
Asahina Mitsuuru had gotten up off the ground, and turned to face Haruki. “I-I’m a man too, you know!” he stuttered.
"Oh? Is that so?" Haruki draped his arms around Asahina-senpai again. He looks like a dangerous kidnapper like that. "How much of a man are you, really?"
Oh no, his eyes look dangerous! Run, Asahina-senpai!
His hand suddenly moved down Asahina Mitsuuru’s body, down to...
Oh. Oh my god.
I wasn't sure who screamed first, but I'd like to think that it was Asahina-senpai, because it's less embarrassing for me. Haruki had really gone too far this time.
"Stop that!" I shouted, trying to push the two of them apart. "What the hell do you think you're doing? That's sexual harassment!" Do you want to be sued!?
“Heh heh, well... whaddya know?" Haruhi chuckled without any shame whatsoever. “He really is a man after all! You wanna check?”
I flushed bright crimson immediately. “What? No!”
Haruki finally let go of Asahina-senpai, who sagged onto the ground, exhausted. The odd thing - well, another odd thing, really - was that Nagato Yuuki hadn't looked up once from his book the entire time. What's with him?
“You see what I mean, right, though? If we can turn something like that into the living embodiment of the spirit of men, the righteousness of our cause shall have been proven to all! All of this, of course, is but a small part of my plan.”
This plan of yours seems dangerous, and not something any sane person would want to get involved with.
“So that’s why you kidnapped him? To make him manlier?”
Asahina-senpai was looking at me with tearful eyes. Maybe he thinks I’m going to save him?
"Well, I thought we could use him to advertise our club, too. Kind of like a… mascot character, that’s it! Something like that."
...It’s official. Haruki’s idiocy has surpassed the idiocy of all the other idiotic idiots in the world. He could join a traveling freak show as "The Most Dangereous Idiot Ever".
"Mitsuru-kun!" Haruhi demanded. "You in any clubs?"
"Uh... uh... I'm in the H-Home Economics Club..."
"Quit that! Not manly enough. Besides, it’ll get in the way of our club activities."
Hey, aren't you being ridiculously selfish here?
Asahina-senpai looked like a victim in what was about to be a murder being asked to choose between death by cyanide or death by strychnine. He focused that puppy-dog stare at me, begging to be rescued; then he noticed Nagato Yuuki for the first time, and his eyes widened in surprise.
"I... see..." he half-whispered, in a voice as soft as the song of a dragonfly, staring at the silent student in the corner. "I understand..."
Uh, what did you just understand?
"I'll quit the Home Ec club, and join this one..."
Eh?
He hesitated. "But, uh, I'm not sure what the Literature club actually does..."
"Oh, we're not the Literature Club." Haruki clarified, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. Seeing Asahina-senpai looking confused, I hurridly cut in to explain.
"We're just borrowing this room for a little while. The club that you've just been forced to join is actually an unnamed organization to be chaired by Suzumiya Haruki that will participate in unknown activities."
"...wha-?"
"Actually, that guy sitting over there is the real and only Literature Club member".
"Oh..."
Asahina-senpai blinked slowly in astonishment, his lips half-open, struck speechless. Couldn't blame him.
"No worries!" said Haruki, his cheerful face declaring himself completely and totally free from any kind of responsibility. He smacked Asahina-senpai's shoulder, hard. "I just thought of a name!"
I glared at Haruki.
"Okay," I said, injecting as much sarcasm into my voice as possible, "let's hear it."
I didn't really want to hear the name, but Haruki was going to tell me anyway. He took a deep breath, in preperation for the momentous revelation of the name of his Grand Design.
------
Attention, duelists! everbody! The name of our fledgling club has been decided. No alterations were made; this is purely the result of Suzumiya Haruki's mind.
SOS Brigade!
That is...
Save the World by
Overloading it with Fun!
Suzumiya Haruki’s Brigade
That is to say, the SOS Brigade.
Feel free to laugh now.
I was too dumbstruck, though, to even manage that.
You're probably wondering why it's called a Brigade. Technically, it should be the "Save the World by Overloading it with Fun! Suzumiya Haruki's Association", but we hadn't satisfied the minimum requirements to become an association, and in any case nobody knew what the club was about, anyway. "Well, let's just call it a brigade, then!" said Haruki, his incomprehensible words settling the matter. And thus was our magnificent club name born.
Asahina-senpai kept his mouth shut, as though resigned to his fate. Nagato Yuuki was technically an outsider. And I couldn't bring myself to say anything. Consequently, the naming of Haruki's club as the "SOS Brigade" passed on one 'aye' and three abstentions.
Oh, joy.
Look, just do whatever you want...
/me stretches, relaxes.
Man, that was annoying. Asahina-senpai is fun to write, though.
It's not as scary as "the Obedience of Suzumiya Haruhi"
...Against my better judgement, link?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jintor
Man, that was annoying. Asahina-senpai is fun to write, though.
There's issues between senpai/sempai in there, and the Abridged Series reference wasn't THAT funny...
Good job, though.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sterling01
That Doujin does bring up the question: What would Sasaki act like if she was drunk?
Anyway back on topic: I wonder how the bedroom scenes from Snow Mountain Syndrome are going to be done.
Your first question: Probably EXACTLY like Haruhi. This requires further research.
Your second: I have NO idea, but since the only one we actually get to see is Mitsuuru/Kyon-chan, it shouldn't be too hard. I think a guy she pretty much considers her brother crawling into bed with her and trying to grope her would be unnerving enough to work with, though.
Your second: I have NO idea, but since the only one we actually get to see is Mitsuuru/Kyon-chan, it shouldn't be too hard. I think a guy she pretty much considers her brother crawling into bed with her and trying to grope her would be unnerving enough to work with, though.
I mostly taking about this part
Spoiler for Novel 5:
Surprisingly, Haruhi actually lowers her head, bites on her lower lip and only opens up after some time.
"I had the strangest dream. I dreamed that you had sneaked into my room and you didn't talk like you would have... urr, and you did things that you wouldn't do. I found it odd... in the end, I punched you hard and you ran off! that's an odd dream! Right? But it didn't feel quite like a dream."
If that was a dream, then this would be a continuation of the dream. As I look at the vexed Haruhi with locked eyebrows, Koizumi heads to my direction.
"I, as well."
He stares right at my face.
"You appeared in my room as well. The appearance might have been you, but the behaviour was just terrifying... anyways, you did things that you wouldn't do."
I start to get frightened out of the blue. My sight moves away from that smiling face of Koizumi, seemingly up to something, and turns instead towards Asahina-san. This is the real McCoy. One look and there's no question about it. How could I have mistaken that person as her? Whether it'd be the feel or in her actions, she cannot compare to the bona fide Asahina-san.
Perhaps my gaze embarrasses her. Asahina-san blushes. Did I appear before her? Just as I assume that to be the case-
"Suzumiya-san came into my room."
Her fingers are caught together and move uneasily.
"That strange Suzumiya-san... I don't know how to describe it, was like a fake..."
Yes, definitely a fake. That is for sure, the problem for this to have happened. Why did fake versions of ourselves appear in each other's room? Asahina-san in mine, I went to Haruhi and Koizumi's rooms, and Haruhi in Asahina-san's room...
"Nagato." I keep pressing. "Who came into your room?"
The stoic façade of Nagato, who is in a t-shirt as is Asahina-san, lifts up and looks directly into me:
"You."
Having said that in a whisper, she slowly closes her eyelids.
2008-03-16, 21:23
. I though it was funny XD.
