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Old 2012-04-24, 09:55   Link #29921
Eratas123
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Original =/= Likeable to fans. If any of the girls rape Ichika, THAT would be original. Would fans like it? Most probably not.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:02   Link #29922
HasuMasu
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^ I'd like to see that, somebody fund this.

On another note, Sword Girls has not just claimed Agetreme's life but now also my own.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:02   Link #29923
Eratas123
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Please don't:/ Rape isn't funny and the way this series is going, it would be played for laughs.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:03   Link #29924
ZeroXSEED
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@ Eras
What I said, it has to be fun.

@ Box
No, just no.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:04   Link #29925
demino_hellsin
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I am also skeptical about the sudden shifts in status quo without any form of build up or some sort of compelling narrative. Thus far, every single plot development has been done by someone evil whom you're more vexed with for doing only half the job they should be. Another point, the level of character depth makes me feel like I'm wading in ffnet rather than watching professional wriing.

Though that's just my opinion.

Also, quite some unknown manga's and anime feel like a fresh series despite overused devices and story pogressions. To Aru and One Piece to name two.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:06   Link #29926
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Detective-san View Post
^ I'd like to see that, somebody fund this.



Also, duel scene WIP...

Spoiler for Duel:
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:07   Link #29927
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Last time I wrote a rape story is because of piled up stress from college, and it's a piece of crap written in two hours, top.

More like an old shame really.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:15   Link #29928
demino_hellsin
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Ichika rape is easy. Just xover with Haruhi

Rape played for laughs is a common tool and used with the basis that its delusional or would end in disastrlus fail anyway.

I wrote something like attempted rape during highschool. The rapist never got deeper than tearing the girl's uniform though.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:15   Link #29929
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An old shame that people seemed to like.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:17   Link #29930
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^ Which makes it even worse, maybe it's the purple prose

It wasn't supposed to be romantic, it was supposed to be tragic and pitiful. I admit though, that it has a potential for both character development AND derailment, but I'm too stupid to pull that stunt.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:19   Link #29931
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Why not? Ichika's going to most likely have a harem end at the climax of FI. No complaints so far on it.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:28   Link #29932
ZeroXSEED
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She was raised in a cold, ruthless environment and grew up with no sense of morality. Ichika gave her just that, and how! Suddenly, she has regret and loneliness the size of everest.

And Now Ichika ALSO has her memories of her past, adding into his post-rape trauma/ pleasure denial, which mean his self-induced idiocy in front of girls is not so much disappeared as it is shattered totally, eww....

As you note though, readers probably like it either way

P.S. anyone watch soccer? I'm sleeping early to watch it. See you guys later.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:31   Link #29933
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Plan for a future arc: Future Kazuma gets accidentally sent back and tries to do the one thing he always wanted: Kill Tabane. Far cry from the humor story, but shows the repurcussions of Tabane's actions on the world at large and what happens when somebody goes "Oh no, you're not leaving on that effing carrot after one of your schemes!".

Yeah, don't like Tabane much.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:38   Link #29934
demino_hellsin
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@zero: what did I just read? no srsly, what did I just read.

@eras: your story has no negative remarks becaus you are writing well. You tie up loose ends, You make sure each character matters to the readers, there are reasons for everything and attention to plot important details. Most importantly, you don't hold back in trying to get readers to sympathize. Though you tend to overdo it sometimes.

Thats just my analysis
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:41   Link #29935
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Demi's suggestion just gave me an idea: Haruhi and IS. Think of the possibilites!
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:45   Link #29936
ZeroXSEED
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^ NOOUUAGHWA!&@^&#)(*@#^!(&(^*@!

On a more serious note: oh crap, just... oh crap.

@ Demi
Well, just read this. Again, a piece of trash that people seems to like.

ZeroXSEED, Out.
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Old 2012-04-24, 10:48   Link #29937
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I can just imagine how changing into the suit would be Yakety sax playing in the background would complete it.
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Old 2012-04-24, 11:40   Link #29938
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Gonna leave this (mostly complete) duel scene here before I turn in:

Spoiler for Duel Scene:
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Old 2012-04-24, 19:57   Link #29939
HasuMasu
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eratas123 View Post
Demi's suggestion just gave me an idea: Haruhi and IS. Think of the possibilites!
Kyon's going to have a stroke at all the things he can snark about in the IS world.
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Old 2012-04-24, 20:41   Link #29940
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Onthe bright side, I think Kyon would be best buds with Ichika.....till he starts holding his hand, then he's gonna point him to Koizumi.
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