2011-02-18, 20:17 | Link #1 |
Member
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: USA
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People say "I love you" too much
What do you think about people who say "I love you" too much and/or to almost everyone they know?
I've seen quite a few in my life, I think they treat love too lightly, sometimes I can't help but think if they really mean it...... |
2011-02-18, 20:42 | Link #2 |
PolyPerson!
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Northern VA
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I know several people like this, and it doesn't bother me TOO terribly much...
I have several people I'll say I love you to, obviously, my kids, hubby and gf, as well as my father. However, there are a few friends, such as my exbf, I do love (not in a romantic manner anymore, we're just incredibly close friends) but do not make a habit of saying it. While I may love many people (seeing as I'm poly, I get attached to people pretty strongly), saying "I love you", to me, signifies a higher.. level? for lack of a better word, and is reserved for those closest to me (aka in a relationship with or my kids/father). It may be different for others, or mayhaps they crave to BE loved so much they "give" love to everyone...
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2011-02-18, 20:49 | Link #3 |
Scholar of Yanderes
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The phrase is a bit overused in my opinion...
Honestly, it makes me... roll my eyes, when the girl I secretly admire says that to me in casual conversation, usually after I help her out with something, and yet the tone of her voice is reason enough to know she's not taking that phrase seriously. Of course, when I reply "I love you, too" even in a more... sincere tone, she doesn't take it seriously. Oh, the painful, irony... Right then... There's of course, the "I love you, man" between bros, the "I love you" towards friends and relatives, and such... Quite frankly, I'm finding it ironic that I personally live in a society that deems the phrase "I love you" to be more friendly and casual than "I like you" which of course, as soon as someone hears that, they automatically assume romantic feelings... Am I the only one who sees this, or what?
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2011-02-18, 20:55 | Link #5 | |
Scholar of Yanderes
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Good lord, I feel much older than I should be, to be dissecting the definitions and inner-most workings of simple phrases people throw to each other back and forth... I'm probably not making any sense at this point, and am simply ranting, so I'm just going to reply to the quote above with, yes.
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2011-02-18, 20:59 | Link #6 |
Okuyasu the Bird
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alberta, Canada
Age: 32
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It's certainly a phase used often but there's just many variations, such as one between friends and family, which is mainly used just to tell them you'll always care about them.
I can't really explain why, but when someone says "I love you" in the the romantic sense, I think you should just be able to tell instantly if it's genuine or not. The way they're acting or the situation you might be in will certainly help you recognize any affection behind those words as well.
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2011-02-18, 21:03 | Link #7 |
Scholar of Yanderes
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Well, tone of voice is the main key factor in determining just to what extent someone loves someone/thing.
Sincerity, sarcasm, adoration, casualness, ect. Those really tell you perhaps what someone means with the phrase. There are other signs, I know, but I feel like I've ranted enough this page...
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2011-02-18, 21:44 | Link #8 |
Senior Member
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smash mouth -
three little words are thrown around so much that after a while they begin to lose there touch. i feel awkward to quote songs, but here i agree. so "i love you". mmm. and again...mmm??? what the hell does that even mean? why not just elaborate, skipping the love part? its one of those things that girls like to hear. maybe boys too. but i could not say it to anyone, because it would be too undefined, meaningless and well, yes, corny. i would use other words than love. a whole lot of words, forming many sentences, actually... love is like moe - the word you think you understand, but you don't.
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2011-02-18, 21:48 | Link #10 |
Dictadere~!
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: On the front lines, fighting for inderpendence.
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Rule #1: If you're just starting to date, and it's high school, it's a load of bullshit when they deem it "love."
Just the other day my friend posted on Facebook that he broke up, and that he had wished this specific relationship was the one to last and that she actually cared for him. You know what I told him? I told him that if it didn't last, she obviously didn't care for him. Simple. Harsh, yes, but that's how it goes. you want to play around like little children go ahead. But don't expect real shit to be happening. I'm in a relationship now, but I surely don't LOVE her. It's a silly high school game, if you ask me.
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2011-02-18, 22:02 | Link #11 | |
PolyPerson!
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Northern VA
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Then again, when something is said too often, you become desensitized to it (like someone saying they're "sorry" about something after doing it for the 18th time in a week.. you just don't believe them anymore). Nopw, I've had someone say they're head over heels for me after the first date (yeah stalker creepy wtf guy that was the ONLY date), and one of my ex's asked me to marry him after a few months of talking online and spending a week together... At what point (if any) does the word "love" lose its meaning for you? Do you think people today use it inappropriately? aka, do they say "love" in stead of "am fond of" or some similar theme?
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2011-02-18, 22:10 | Link #12 | |
Senior Member
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anyway, love is too undefined and abstract and SUBJECTIVE!!! yeah, guess what, every person thinks love is one thing but when he tells the other person, it turns out the other person thinks its something ass backwards. while "i am fond of you" has very specific meaning. nothing to be confused about here. that is why i am against generalising words like "love". better to waste half an hour explaining to a girl what you feel, without using the word "love", than to just say "i love you". i think the emptiness of the phrase can be understood even by some girls.
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2011-02-18, 22:16 | Link #13 |
Test Drive
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IMO just saying "I'm fond of you" can still be rather abstract depending on who you say it to; after all, saying it in the first place implies you have some deeper feelings for the person you're saying it too, regardless off if it's familial, friendship, or romantic. It's really just a more low-key, indirect way of saying "I like you" or "I love you".
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2011-02-19, 01:22 | Link #15 | |
Senior Member
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"fond of" doesn't have that significance, even if abstract. ppl will react more normally to it and won't hold you responsible ("but you said you loved me! then why?!")
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2011-02-19, 09:32 | Link #16 | |
思想工作
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Vereinigte Staaten
Age: 32
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In my entire life, I cannot remember having ever said "I love you" to anyone. There are people I love, but I would feel weird if I ever had to say it so directly.
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2011-02-19, 09:58 | Link #18 |
Member of DOLLARS
Artist
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: In the magical land of Moonswell pass
Age: 28
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I throw around I love you all the time with friends, when after doing something assholish or being insulted or hit I just go "Love you too"
But I do have that cynical bastard in me that laughs in sarcastic disbelief when I see my friends saying "I loved him", "I love you" in a serious manner when they are merely 15/16 causing the asshole in me to shout "Ah still haven't learnt your lesson from the last person you 'loved', ah retards...they never learn" I love most people in the phileo (brotherly) way and that is what I mean when I say it. Its three words, not really hard to say, I can say it in the most serious tone with the most serious/sincere face and say "I love you" then stand up laugh and say "Just kidding" People put too much meaning in words.
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