2011-12-19, 11:40 | Link #9881 | |
Underweight Food Hoarder
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For me personally, that kind of superiority attitude is a major turn off lol. Don't think I'd want to engage in a relationship where the other person thinks I'm the one that should try and not her. |
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2011-12-19, 12:59 | Link #9883 | |
Careful now.
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: UK
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I think it is good to have some crossover with hobbies and interests with your partner. My boyfriend and I do have similarities but they aren't identical, eg we both love comics but he mostly buys American ones while I buy manga, but we will sometimes read each other's. He'll watch some anime- the usual suspects like Ghibli films, Satoshi Kon films, GitS, Eden of the East, Cowboy Bebop etc but will turn his nose up at all the high school comedy/ romances that I have He hadn't watched any anime apart from Akira when I met him, but I usually have a good idea of what film or series he would enjoy. It doesn't matter if someone doesn't have the same interests as you right away, you can introduce each other to new things bit by bit and will probably find more things you both like.
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2011-12-19, 14:01 | Link #9885 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Suburban DC
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If not and you were just American/Western I'd just say tell em to Piss off/Sod Off/Va ta faire Voir or whatever linguistic stand in you have. It's your life, do it when you're ready and tell them to mind their own buisness less they THEMSELVES have trouble in paradise but don't know it. On the hobbies thing, it is true there should be SOME overlap. Otherwise, you really have to be intune with that "deep spiritual connection" jargon I talked about and it's often hard to pick up since we humans place so much emphasis on superficality in society. And same thing on the "Leagues". Remember, people are people are people. Now, the income gap thing may be a bit harder to deal with (especially for a dude) but it's been dealt with before. Otherwise, the people who normally have this "league" problem are nerds. It's time to get some friggin nerd pride and while embracing your uniqueness acting like a MAN about it. League talk is overrated. You don't put the pussy on a pedestal. |
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2011-12-19, 14:30 | Link #9886 | |
Anime Cynic
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: USA
Age: 35
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2011-12-19, 14:36 | Link #9887 | |
Underweight Food Hoarder
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I've tried to ask out girls that seem to be better than me in both appearance and intelligence. But what can I do? I just ask them out anyways. I got turned down every time because they probably see the same, but that assumption isn't enough to stop me from trying at least. --- Off topic on a tangent Does anyone see calmness as a positive trait anymore? Theoretically, that seems like a positive trait but my experience with women seems to be the opposite. Everyone seems to like the spontaneous emotional craze more than stability. =/ If only relationships didn't begin with a load of superficial judgement... xP |
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2011-12-19, 15:01 | Link #9888 | |
Senior Guest
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Athens (GMT+2)
Age: 35
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2011-12-19, 15:13 | Link #9889 |
Anime Cynic
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: USA
Age: 35
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It depends on how you define "calmness." If you mean "level-headed and slow to anger," of course it's a positive trait. If you mean "never enthusiastic about anything," that's less desirable. Apathy is never attractive, but being overly emotional isn't either.
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2011-12-19, 18:38 | Link #9890 |
Knight Errant
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Dublin, Ireland
Age: 35
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You guys that talk about a girl being "out of your league" need to get some self respect. It would take her to be a supermodel with a nobel's prize in physics for her to be really out of your league.
You guys are all smart, and you're probably not that bad looking. If there is a deficit in the looks department it's most likely entirely solved by: a) losing weight. b) taking a shower. c) Wearing some slightly snazzier clothes. Rather then that stupid faded meme referencing t-shirt, you could just wear a regular button up shirt. Now you've become thoroughly elite, for about the cost of $15. It's really that easy. I'll admit a) can be hard, if you have weight problems, but I find plenty of perfectly thin guys still go around with the whole "out of my league talk". Jeez, these guys need to learn to be a bit more, I don't know, arrogant. Aside from that super-model nobel laureate I already mentioned, most women aren't any better then you. A lot of them will be worse then you. And you know what, if you look at yourself in the mirror, with the right thought, you'll look pretty damn studly. You'd be surprised how many people agree with you. Heck, if a girl's consented to go out with you, she probably thinks you're pretty studly too. Remember that and take pride. And if people do call you arrogant for being full of yourself, well I have the perfect reply for you "It's not arrogance when it's true". They'll either realise that in fact, you are just as amazing as you claim you are, or laugh themselves silly at your gumption. Either way, you win. |
2011-12-19, 19:56 | Link #9891 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Suburban DC
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Arrogant is not quite the word, but it's getting there. Once again, the Don is the Man of the Hour with award winning advice.
Take me, I'm a quirky, booky, calm type of guy by nature, and I damn sure ain't your sterotypical hip "brotha". But at this point in time in my life I'm not taking ANY SHIT from anyone about it. I am who I am dammit and if you don't like that, STUFF IT. Chicks run with that mantra all the time. You have to take it with that approach it's like Kaoru from Welcome to the NHK anime if anyone saw it... Spoiler for late in the shows run spoiler:
If you're not just worried about booty calls, than you have to realize on average most women want a guy who's nice capable compassionate and can take care of them (whatever that means in this day and age, the gals call the shots on that one). Oh sure, they'd LIKE a Brad Pitt (or cultural equivalent) who had all those same qualities, but if you take care of yourself, have pride in yourself and treat her with respect then you can get "the cute ones" (dependent on you two being individually compatible with each other). Being modest is good, but while you don't need to be the Fonz, pulling a full on Charlie Brown isn't gonna get you any closer to that Lil' Red Haired Girl you so desire. You're one of a multitude of guys on the market, if you don't believe what you're selling, she won't either. Know and highlight what good points, keep your self presentable, stay confident and something will turn up. (ATTENTION: Still you shouldn't just go after beauty queens just to go after em, don't be afraid of going after or talking to a hot chick but remember what you're looking for BEHIND the window dressing, otherwise you'll likely run in circles and run the risk of having great sex but not much else, and even the sex isn't guaranteed unfortunately. |
2011-12-19, 21:14 | Link #9892 | |
Anime Cynic
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: USA
Age: 35
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No difficulty with arrogance here.
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2011-12-20, 10:13 | Link #9894 | |
Anime Cynic
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: USA
Age: 35
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2011-12-20, 23:51 | Link #9896 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Suburban DC
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NOOOOOOO!!!!!! My sophomoric dream SHATTERED!! HOLLYWOOD LIED TO ME!!!!
Anyway, anyone doing or did the online dating thingy before? I made fun of it before but I gave into temptation and joined OK Cupid, e-flirting as we speak. It's kinda fun actually! |
2011-12-20, 23:57 | Link #9897 | |
Megane girl fan
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
Age: 55
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Endless "Online Dating" Soul
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2011-12-21, 01:07 | Link #9899 |
Megane girl fan
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
Age: 55
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mIRC was, and still is, mainly a chat program. Some subbers still use it today for file sharing, but back in the mid and late 90s it was mainly used for socializing. You could join channels with hundreds of people, or do individual chats. Met a lot of people this way.
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2011-12-21, 07:35 | Link #9900 | |
Underweight Food Hoarder
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But, once you avoid the scammers, bots and one-night-standers, I hear there are some really decent people that is very hard to notice if you met them irl first. ------ How was your scavenging? I never tried but I can somewhat imagine I'd be a nervous wreck than if it was face-to-face conversations. |
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Tags |
advice, break-ups, dating, dating after divorce, divorce, happiness, love, pairings, single dad, single mom |
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