Quote:
Originally Posted by toran
I love the chapter. I didn't see anything really wrong at first glance, so I don't have too much to comment.
Why do I get the feeling Nanoha is going to berserk here?
I just got the image of her attacking everyone there in a fit of rage.
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If she can go berserk in WD, it's just going to get worse, here... >.>
Quote:
Originally Posted by SpaceBrotha
I went and read the white devil and Resplendence of ebony, and the darker mood you set was rather convincing, the guilt, rage, desperation and generally darker mood seem likely in the situation you've put the characters in.
as for the OC: It's really been a while since i saw someone so down to the core evil, and can't get much more evil than what you've got there... well there's ONE thing i can think up right now, but that would push the T rating to M and perhaps even beyond  (is there anything beyond M anyway?)
Looking forward to the next chapter... and dreading it somewhat |
Quote:
Originally Posted by SpaceBrotha
Master of understatements right there...
...He's evil right down to the point where even the reader just wants to hurt him as badly as possible.
...and i'm going to miss that piece of the chair that i wrenched off accidentally while reading... 
Edit: Woo! page claim! |
Hearing this pleases me so. <3
...Though I have to admit I didn't think anyone would be affected by him that much. O.o Cause he's just a sort of random character out of the blue that I dumped evilness and evilness and evilness into it. I'm not much of a creator, which is why I usually stay far, far away from OC characters. I would have used Jail, but he's not quite suitable either.
*tries to fix chair but ends up making it squeaky*
...Well. At least you can still, uh, sit on it...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Saint X
Yes MA is not allowed...
dark and evil OC eh...
Introduce him/her to the Outer Cadian Society of Dark and Evil OCs... and have him/her beaten up by the Outer Cadian Society of Heroes
TAXI, LART SHELTER QUICK!!!</tech comedy>
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...Don't put ideas in my head, I beg. You're going to start making me list out things like behavior and looks and etc which I've been trying to avoid thinking of desperately, because then it's going to make me fond of him and...and... DD:
...but it could be entertaining. The fandom needs more bad guys so I can use them for...certain purposes...