2013-12-18, 11:50 | Link #11041 | |
NYAAAAHAAANNNNN~
Join Date: Nov 2007
Age: 35
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2013-12-18, 14:02 | Link #11042 | |
malefic
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Nowhere, because I don't exist
Age: 32
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2013-12-18, 14:08 | Link #11043 | |||
Nyaaan~~
Join Date: Feb 2006
Age: 40
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My comments are thus: 1) Why are you presuming that those people are lying on their profiles? I would write the same thing and I wouldn't be lying. I do like to travel .. but I also enjoy staying at home playing games for 15 hours. 2) Even if they were lying -- if it's that obvious -- do you think the girls reading these profiles don't have eyes that can see through bullshit? If you say you like to travel -- people will actually ask you where you've gone? Where you'd like to go? Do you think if you all lied on your profiles other people wouldn't see through it? 3) Saintess ..
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2013-12-18, 15:00 | Link #11044 | |
Knight Errant
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Dublin, Ireland
Age: 35
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I also feel that you might be down on yourself for your lack of "adventure", if so do something about it! Either lose the excuses and do those adventures, or be a bit more positive about your unadventurous lifestyle! I crack jokes on my profile about how I'm on my computer most fridays nights, and plenty of girls dig that. The ones who don't I probably wouldn't get along with anyway. You need to be in a place where you like yourself, after all if you can't love yourself, how can you expect the same of someone else to? And if you don't like yourself, figure out why and work on it. For instance I was down on myself for being unemployed, and so I focused on that instead of dating. After I got a job I had nothing to be ashamed of anymore, and I found it much easier to talk with women, as I didn't need to hide anything. |
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2013-12-18, 17:55 | Link #11045 | ||
Deadpan Snarker
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: The Neverlands
Age: 46
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Or just like most people, you scrounge up the money for a few weeks long vacation somewhere on this planet I bet you stay at home and play games more than you travel "I like to take my motorcycle to the track" Exciting stuff huh,... better NOT mention I've only done so 2 times in the 9 years I have my license Quote:
The term "looking for my prince on his white steed" is found ad nauseum in these profiles So the fantasy needs to be kept alive as best as possible And I'm pretty sure me stating "No prince with steed, I'm more like a labourer on a bicycle" -even though it's pretty close to true- will have negative effects on how they percieve me, when 2 profiles earlier some guy DOES claim to be their fantasy delusion
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2013-12-18, 18:27 | Link #11046 | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Age: 38
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Also, what Nightbat said. |
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2013-12-18, 22:34 | Link #11047 | |
Nyaaan~~
Join Date: Feb 2006
Age: 40
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As for the first part of your message -- you're making an absurd comparison (reductio ad absurdum) -- it's like saying:
"You said you like fried chicken? Well, do you eat it 9 months out of the year!?" I'm am also perfectly okay with saying: "I travel when I can, which is not as much as I'd like, a couple of weeks a year .. most of the time I'm a bit of a homebody, sitting around watching tv, playing games and spending time with close friends" - how about that one? Do you have an objection against that? Quote:
"I'm not a prince on a white steed, but I'm a hard working guy that is looking for a down to earth girl to get to know and maybe have some good times with" -- I bet you it'll resonate with more than a few nice girls.
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2013-12-19, 05:26 | Link #11048 | |||
Knight Errant
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Dublin, Ireland
Age: 35
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But you're reading too much into it. Most women have pretty low expectations. Social skills are the only thing you need. Quote:
And if you feel anxious about your inexperience, don't worry too much, unless you're cruising for sex, most girls won't notice, and those who do may find it "cute"! (Think hugh grant). However you do need to get used to rejection, it's going to happen A LOT. It's their problem though! Online dating is a great safe way to get used to this, I find. Quote:
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2013-12-19, 14:59 | Link #11050 | |||||||||||
Deadpan Snarker
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: The Neverlands
Age: 46
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you'd be seeing THAT on dating profiles a lot more Oh, and I like riding my bike Enough to do it untill the winter makes it too risky, which makes it about 9 months a year Quote:
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though I would omit the "good time" bit, since I won't/can't garantee someone else's opinion Quote:
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If that were true I'd gotten hitched years ago Who do you think is the guy who gets the most reactions "Warehouse worker" or "Assistant veterinarian" (hell we even have a datingsite for "higher educated" people over here, where I'll bet a whole lot more ladies are registered than the 'normal' sites) Yeah, my social skills could use some polishing up, since treating men and women equally doesn't work when women want to be treated specially Quote:
and a person quickly content with the few good things he has, even if they aren't 'perfect' Quote:
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Since when is the one that has water in a desert at a disadvantage? Last I checked, most, if not all, ended up just fine without me Quote:
But it's also a lot less personal, and in many cases, a 'stage' to perform on Quote:
But I'll be damned if I sugarcoat anything, I sure as hell didn't live in a cotton-candy world any hard facts were given as "this is how it is, deal with it" no "But/maybe/if"s I am certainly able of being kind and gentle but I state it as: "I like you" instead of "Young lady, I must admit that your interesting personality has maken me grow fond of your presence" People want a play, a fantasy setting, I just happen to be a a lousy actor (or maybe should say that I hate acting, ...and theater in general )
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2013-12-19, 21:04 | Link #11051 | |||||||||||
Knight Errant
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Dublin, Ireland
Age: 35
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[/Quote] because looks, ambition, smoothtalking and intelligence are worth a hell of a lot more?[/quote] Really another way to say social skills. You can work on that... Quote:
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2013-12-21, 20:44 | Link #11052 | |||||||||||
Deadpan Snarker
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: The Neverlands
Age: 46
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*this is my 3rd revisit to a reply, pretty hard to remain clear and to-the-point without a lot of elaboration
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over here, the ones into that are mostly immigrants from the east for the rest, it's a society scared of getting their hands dirty, and an increasing shortage of unskilled and skilled labourers Quote:
I don't set up people for potential disappointment, I'd expect the same courtesy in return "a great time" can be assessed AFTER the event, not before and even then, it's a personal opinion in which you have no control over the other's Quote:
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has nothing to do with me needing to change profession If women consider what I do is not good enough, **** 'em! I don't care if the girl I'm interested in flips burgers at the McDrive, why should it matter the other way around? I could understand a disdain for social leechers, that sit on their ass and make no effort to make themselves usefull But here we're talking about having a decent job which pays the bills which only lacks higher social status Quote:
Not looking like George Clooney may also have something to do with that Quote:
All I do know is that I'm content with what I have, and continue to (try and) improve my life That I'll never be a millionaire or president is fine by me and I've given up on becoming "Mr. Popular" long ago Again, if that's not good enough, I fail to see why I should do any 'extra' effort for the lady Quote:
I can't supply that, I have good traits that apparently play second fiddle to polishing a turd Quote:
I do not posses the character/charm/aura/whatever that makes people think I need help/protection/understanding Oooh, they know where to find me when they need it, because I do have the 'aura' of someone willing to help and get the job done but I could actually get on my knees and beg for help, yet recieve nothing but an apology Yeah, it may be considered good to not appear to be weak, untill you need help then you're ****ed Quote:
they passed on spending time with someone they are not interested in, whatever 'profit' they could have gained is irrelevant since they had no desire to look for profit in the first place and I'm offering a real guy, not someone pretending to be the best thing since sliced bread It's what I'd like to see in return (well, not a guy though ) And a lady actually willing to hang out with me? I'd consider it a gift Last time I checked, it's certainly not a right, it's not like I can chain myself to a fence and demand it Quote:
It's not unlike that image of a perfect big mac in the advert, which, after you paid for it, open the box and see the real thing is a lumpy, flattened, lifeless piece of bread with some meat, sauce and vegetables crushed between them Yes, I know it's not a good move to advertise with a lumpy burger, but at least you know what you're getting This is what I sell: a decent guy, seen some milage, has some wear, old workhorse what lacks in glitter and glamour is made up with reliability and resolution, got some creases, but they probably can be ironed out in time Quote:
And I have no problems with jobapplications since those qualities seemingly undesired in romance are appreciated in a workforce of my level But no one -including me- wants to have "here lies a dependable colleague - we will miss the income he generated" on his headstone
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2013-12-21, 22:28 | Link #11053 | |
Nyaaan~~
Join Date: Feb 2006
Age: 40
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Point #2 -- I think this is more emblematic of people saying you're selling yourself short. They're arguably passing on spending time with someone they don't know and could be potentially missing out on something that could be amazing. Amazing isn't always flying to sunny destinations and expensive presents. Amazing can be waking up on a cold morning, snuggling closer to your partner under a blank and falling back asleep .. only to wake up again and them having a hot cup of coffee ready for you!
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2013-12-23, 18:31 | Link #11054 | |||
Deadpan Snarker
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: The Neverlands
Age: 46
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So, I should take someone never content with what they have, only forging forward, leaving behind what has 'lost it's initial value'? So, at what point will I lose my "initial value"? Quote:
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2013-12-23, 21:32 | Link #11055 | |
Nyaaan~~
Join Date: Feb 2006
Age: 40
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My point is not about "going forward" as in the past has lost it's value or only about having more ambition and never having enough .. it's about deciding how you envision what you want your life to be like -- and then think about whether the potential mates you'll meet actually fit into that. If you want a simple life .. smallish house some day, children, sending said children to college, etc. Well, flipping burgers for the rest of her life probably isn't going to cut it. Doesn't mean either of you need to be doctors or lawyers, but it does mean you have to be aware of what people want and how they expect to get there.
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2013-12-25, 09:47 | Link #11056 |
Deadpan Snarker
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: The Neverlands
Age: 46
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I get that, but I look from my own perspective, which, at this moment, is quite allright
Job, house, bike, parakeet, hobbies, what is there to desire more? Better job? Bigger house? Faster bike? Tame bird of prey? More hobbies? Nah. Already having the knowledge and experience being off much worse in the past, I'll appreciate what I have now So any person with that same mindset, could by no means, be a turnoff for me
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2014-01-16, 11:22 | Link #11057 |
Nyaaan~~
Join Date: Feb 2006
Age: 40
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So, to throw some more controversy into the whole "online dating" thing -- here's a blog that details the tale of a female here in Toronto (Canada) that is on a mission to eat at the nicest restaurants in the city .. and make her dates pay for all of it!
From the beginning: http://restauranttipsfromaserialdate...ets-go-fishing
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2014-01-16, 11:58 | Link #11058 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Age: 38
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If they got the money to spend, more power to them. She's basically being an escort, but dishonest about it. Since I'm not stinking loaded, if a girl wanted to go to a top line place on a first date she can look elsewhere. That kind of thing would be for special dinners, not "hey let's get to know each other".
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advice, break-ups, dating, dating after divorce, divorce, happiness, love, pairings, single dad, single mom |
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