2009-03-10, 18:01 | Link #282 | |
Counting days
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Not even close to the Caribbean anymore
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Cuppy Cake, I've been reading what's been going on with you and it reminds me about what happened to me many years ago. My ex was very controlling too ever since we met, yes, through internet. He would find me annoying sometimes and would even block me in his messenger, then unblock me when he felt like it and apologize. He was extremely controlling and unfortunately, I didn't realize what was going on. I was extremely naive. Without knowing him too well I married him because he was quite quick in putting an engagement ring on my finger. We got engaged after having only been together (in person) for one week. >.< Two years later we got married and the time we spent together in person had been less than three months. Everything else was online and it was always with him getting angry at me for any reason and me crying countless nights. This got worse in marriage and, of course, he couldn't block me then. Our marriage became a nightmare with me running away from home many times in tears and his Okinawan parents making him fetch me and calling him "baka" plenty of times. >.< Everything got worse and worse and yes, he would always apologize after having treated me like trash and even bought me expensive gifts, but this kind of thing becomes very destructive and mines self esteem. The gifts were another way of having me under control and "happy." When I grew cold and started snapping back by defending myself, things got reaaally ugly and we divorced to avoid a possible tragedy. Sweetie, it already started bad. It won't get better. I wasted five years of my life waiting for some miracle that would transform a relationship that had already started badly into something beautiful. My ex mother-in-law even begged me in tears not leave her son saying her life had been the same (and still was) and that it was "normal" for men to treat women like trash. I begged my ex for us to look for help together and see a therapist, but anything I would suggest was meaningless and just "stupid womanly emotions." Cuppy Cake, you are already suffering. Don't go further into this. You should really break up with this person. |
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2009-03-11, 04:49 | Link #283 |
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Derelict Apartment Block
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I allready did, i sended him a message explaining everything, he saw the message he readed it and didn't give me any reply's, and then i sended him another saying "so you don't wan't to reply, we are over"
he doesen't even wan't to say anything;_; |
2009-03-11, 05:22 | Link #285 | |
Honyaku no Hime
Fansubber
Join Date: May 2008
Location: In the eastern capital of the islands of the rising suns...
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Every post was bringing me closer to snapping point in terms of 'wake up and smell the coffee already!' (If you're not sure of that expression it means, pay attention to what's going on and do something about it) You say you sent him a message, best is to send email cause then they really have no excuse of 'I couldn't read it' It stays in their inbox. All I hope after all the energy everyone has spent telling and advising you of the same thing is that for the next few weeks you remain single and not take him back. He may try to apologise, he may try to say 'he's changed', he may even go as far as to 'break up' with someone to prove it, but kick his lame-ass to the curb and get on with your life. Tell yourself 'I deserve better, I deserve someone who truly respects me'. Give yourself some confidence and one day you'll hopefully meet someone who'll adore you for you and not just treat you like shit, like you tell us this guy has been doing by his words and actions. All the advice given here isn’t just limited to online relationships btw, watch out for this kinda of behaviour from guys offline too if you happen to come across someone you like. It'll be hard and painful at first like most seperations, but time heals emotional wounds if you work at it and you'll feel better for ridding yourself of such a draining and negative person. All the best~
__________________
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2009-03-11, 05:35 | Link #286 | |
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Derelict Apartment Block
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2009-07-30, 22:13 | Link #287 |
MIKI_VON_BEUKEN!
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If your going to have an internet relationship or a relationship period, then you shouldn't ask your friends, or family, or whoever you can questions on your insecurities. Theres only going to be something you don't want to here if people aernt always on your side. (for the people who ask, but doesn't really want any advice from anyone who opposes) All we can give is opinions or theories or from experience even.
Dear everyone who has given me suggestions in this forum in the past, (ask me who i am, i will tell you and if you want to know what happen i will let you know) I just wanted to thank everyone. So Thanks so much. Last edited by Miki_von_Beuken; 2009-07-30 at 22:15. Reason: forgot to add something |
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