Gift Giving

[SaintessHeart]

Well, there are three things I do with gifts that are useless to me :

1. Make something else out of it (I once turned a music CD into a clock)
2. Ebay
3. Charity

I usually do 1 or 3, thank goodness for organisations like the Salvation Army which made 3 a much easier choice; there is once a relative got me a teddy bear (I AM A GUY, WHY THE HECK DO I NEED CUDDLY STUFF LIKE THAT) and I gave it away in 7 days at a donation drive.

[synaesthetic]

I'll donate to a lot of charities, but never to Salvation Army. Or United Way. Both of them are corrupt as hell.

If I've got clothes or furniture I don't want I usually donate it to Out of the Closet or Goodwill.

[iceyfw]

Originally Posted by Vexx

I suppose the OP could buy his sister a jock strap and innocently declare "its the thought that counts" but then flame gear might be needed.

totally made me LOL.

Originally Posted by Xacual

So I guess what I'm asking is, do you agree that it's bad manners to tell someone they gave a terrible gift or to try to educate someone on better gift ideas? Apparently for my family it's rude but I'm curious about other people's opinions on accepting gifts even if they aren't something you'd ever even glanced at before

i would honestly consider how the person you tell would react. if the person isn't the type to get butthurt over this kind of response, then no harm done. and i'm in a similar situation you're in. i go to a family dinner every christmas where the families gather once a year (moms side) and we exchange gifts. i just keep my mouth shut and keep a poker face when i open the gifts.

[Miko Miko]

At the end of the day it's a nice gesture and it's the thought put into buying it that counts. Just remember people they didn't have to get you anything. Bet half of you would be complaining if they didn't..

[Hiroi Sekai]

Originally Posted by Miko Miko

At the end of the day it's a nice gesture and it's the thought put into buying it that counts. Just remember people they didn't have to get you anything. Bet half of you would be complaining if they didn't..

True, and I probably would - humans are greedy creatures, after all.

What I'd like to clarify is that the thought is always nice and you should appreciate it, but if you honestly get something you can never use, it's a better gesture to hand it over to someone who will. Just don't be up and coming for telling the one who gave it to you that you're proud to get rid of it.

[synaesthetic]

Originally Posted by Miko Miko

At the end of the day it's a nice gesture and it's the thought put into buying it that counts. Just remember people they didn't have to get you anything. Bet half of you would be complaining if they didn't..

I would complain less if they did not waste their money on something completely useless to me. I am not so shallow that I would rather get a pointless gift in order to inflate my ego, than get no gift at all and allow the gift-giver to keep their money and use it for something practical.

[hoshikuzu]

I would accept any gifts, even if it means that I will not use it.

To me, it's the thought that counts.

[chachaboru]

i will accept it....
the one who gave the gift might feel bad if i said that the gift is useless to me...

[Miko Miko]

Originally Posted by synaesthetic

I would complain less if they did not waste their money on something completely useless to me. I am not so shallow that I would rather get a pointless gift in order to inflate my ego, than get no gift at all and allow the gift-giver to keep their money and use it for something practical.

Fair point. But it's something people do regarding birthdays/christmas.. it's just what everyone thinks of, whether you use it or not shouldn't matter. Most people [outside family] only spend £5 on there friends anyway. I think you should appreciate more what you get given. Whether you like it or not.

[synaesthetic]

I haven't had anyone buy me a useless gift in years, so fortunately I rarely have to worry about complaining. Everyone who is willing to buy me a gift is also willing to ask me what I want first, which I think works out just fine. I do the same for them when it's their turn.

The whole "surprise" aspect never really got me wet. I hate surprises. They're almost never good.

[Last Sinner]

My mother bought me a truly ingenious gift for my 30th birthday a few days ago. Amongst the decent clothes and funky underwear, she got me a high quality mattress topper filled with duck down. I'm finding myself spending more time in bed now, because my back is loving that matress topper so much.

She is also the only person that knows what to give. I get junk from anyone else. I play the diplomat at the events, but only my mum's gifts stay in use/on display.

Now it's time for another session on that matress topper.

[DonQuigleone]

Originally Posted by synaesthetic

I haven't had anyone buy me a useless gift in years, so fortunately I rarely have to worry about complaining. Everyone who is willing to buy me a gift is also willing to ask me what I want first, which I think works out just fine. I do the same for them when it's their turn.

The whole "surprise" aspect never really got me wet. I hate surprises. They're almost never good.

when you receive something you know you're going to recieve it's semi-pointless. Last sinner's example above was really good:

Originally Posted by Last Sinner

My mother bought me a truly ingenious gift for my 30th birthday a few days ago. Amongst the decent clothes and funky underwear, she got me a high quality mattress topper filled with duck down. I'm finding myself spending more time in bed now, because my back is loving that matress topper so much.

She is also the only person that knows what to give. I get junk from anyone else. I play the diplomat at the events, but only my mum's gifts stay in use/on display.

Now it's time for another session on that matress topper.

Basically his mother knew him well enough to be able to guess what exactly he needed, and got it for him. She got him something he didn't know he'd enjoy. This is the essence of good gift giving. That said it's usually hard to pull this off consistently, so you have to rely instead on lists.

[Drake]

I think things like family and financial circumstances can affect how people appreciate things like gifts and such.

My own family isn't particularly well off so giving and receiving gifts is a rare occurrence but when we do its generally a teary eyed affair with a real sense of appreciation from everyone.

Expecting and getting something for every birthday or christmas probably just dilutes and desensitizes the experience.

[Throne Invader]

Well, I've most certainly have gotten gifts that I had 0% interest in. It's all gonna depend on your manners and maybe environmental customs how you deal with it. I for one would not dare at all to tell someone they gave a bad gift or a lousy one at that probably because I do appreciate the fact that they spent money to buy the gift. It could have also been a freebie they had no use for, or maybe something old stuck in their house that doesn't serve any purpose whatsoever for them. If I knew or assumed any of the aforementioned, I wouldn't reject the gift but it surely lowers the sentimental value.

If I do get a gift I don't like, it probably just gets stuck somewhere in the house or I give it to someone in my family.

In the end, a bad gift or shall I say, a useless or boring gift is only going to matter as much as how you're going to let it affect you.

[Last Sinner]

Well. it isn't like my family is that great in the money department either. My mother is simply very good at saving even under tight circumstances and buying things on sale.